Old joke.html The old joke

By Juliss the Severed Snake.

Not much had been left to check. I was looking at Moon Chart in my hands in the narrow beams of light, streaming from the school windows, when a dark shadow fell on the parchment.

"Hello, slimeball", drawled too familiar voice.

"Hello, barking freak", answered I.

"What are you doing here? Crawl back to your murky dungeon, or you'll see your disgusting features smeared over the wall"

"Be quiet, Black, you're risking your own disgusting features. Last time we've met it was cactuses all over your face, if I remember right. This time it might be chicken eggs instead of your eyes-not that it changes much…" I pulled my wand out of my robes pocket, smiling as nastily as possible (and I can sport out a really nasty sort of smile).

"Too cowardly for upright fight, aren't you?" growled Black, squinting at wand in my hand.

"Check me", my smile went even nastier. I could read Black's face as a plain sheet of paper- he was eager to hit me but the recollection about cactuses sprouting from his cheeks forced him to cool down.

"Anyway, you hadn't answered. What are you doing outdoors that late?" continued Black, edging nearer. His eyes glinted like embers in coming darkness.

"Not of your business, Padfoot".

"You sneaking git!" The growl in Black's voice was almost canine, but if he intended to scare me out of my wits with this cheap show he certainly had overestimated himself.

"Sneaking around, one could learn loads of interesting stuff. For example, your friend, Moony"…

"So that's why you're lurking here. Want to see him trans…" He checked himself, but too late.

"I see. So I'm right. He's a werewolf. Now, that's really impressing, Headmaster letting a werewolf in. Did he tame him before? He should have trained him well, I suppose, bringing a stick, so on. Oh no, I'm mistaken-bringing a stick is your part, Padfoot"…

He snapped and was about to lunge on me when the doors behind cracked and two figures slipped out. One was Madame Pomfrew, wrapped in thick woolen cloak, and the second unmistakably was Black's buddy Lupin. We both-Black and me-had frozen on the spot, hidden in deep shadow.
Madam Pomfrew marched Lupin down the Quidditch pitch towards Whomping Willow, which branches kept swishing aggressively, crouching in howling wind.

I couldn't figure out what they were doing under the tree, but a minute later Madam Pomfrew appeared at the path alone, heading back for the school entrance.

"Guided her ward outside, just to let him eat somebody in Hogsmead, I guess?" hissed I when the doors closed. Then I turned to Black, to see a dim smile wandering on his face.

"What? Ready to hunt down somebody too, Black?"

"Not me. I've heard recently that somebody cried about how brave he is, or am I mistaken?"

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing could scare you, right? What about full-grown werewolf?"

"No one in your filthy company could scare me, Black, werewolf or not"

"Prove it"

"And how should I?"

"You can just follow him"

"To be beaten to death by mad tree? Thank you very much, Black, it's your piece to play a brainless idiot"

"You can just pick a tick and push a knob on tree's trunk. Come along, I'll show you. Or are you scared?"

"Eat dirt, Black, I'm not!"

And we started for a haggard swishing tree down the path…