I Choose You
"Oliver you can't do this," Felicity begged as he stalked through their home. Many years ago they had moved back into the Queen mansion having spent long enough away from it and they felt strong enough to bring back the Queen legacy. Now that future was threatened by a group who had taken up in Starling City with ties to the Bratva - an organization that Oliver had cut ties with the first few years he had been back – and apparently the grudges they were known to hold extended to even Oliver Queen, billionaire playboy turned Mayor. Threats from multiple sources had been taunting the former members of Team Arrow, something that Oliver knew not to take lightly. It had been a quiet few years, but his senses were still on alert – and he knew better than to brush off Bratva threats.
Oliver took the hidden door to their panic room- a new addition he had put in before they moved, Felicity's footsteps echoed down the stairs as she followed him – unrelenting as ever. They had been arguing about this for days - ever since a package had been delivered to their doorstep while Felicity was home alone. It had enraged Oliver – the fact that someone had been so close to his wife – not to mention that she even now she refused any personal protection that wasn't John. Diggle had been on a trip with Lyla and their daughter Sara, an early ten year anniversary present from the Queen couple and so Felicity had been without her personal bodyguard and apparently the Bratva were keeping good tabs on her if they knew that.
When he rushed home from the office and she explained the situation – along with being obstinate that she didn't need more protection – repeatedly telling him that she was more than capable of protecting herself. He had pulled his hair as she tapped her foot at him, waiting for him to explode; Oliver knew that she was capable – he had trained her himself - but even in the years before they were together he had always worried about her safety. It was something he still had nightmares about. She just kissed him and held his hand to her heart, assuring him that nothing would happen to her; but now, Oliver had received another threat - one at his office this time and again Felicity was the subject - that sparked the argument again.
"Listen to me! You can't run off as The Arrow again like you used to - this isn't for the sake of the city this time, you can find another way." Felicity spoke up behind him as he reached the floor of the basement and Oliver turned to her, drinking in her golden hair and earnest expression.
"Felicity, you saw the threat - you did the research on their plan! I can't just sit here and do nothing, you're too important to me."
The emotions he had been holding back washed over his face and Felicity changed tactics and just clicked her tongue, "If I didn't know any better I would think you just missed running around in your leather pants," raising her eyebrow in a mocking tone.
His smile broke through the trademark brood and he held her face between his palms, leaning down to kiss her. He had meant to keep it soft, but their passion from earlier caused Felicity to hold him to her, their mouths open and devouring. He pulled away just enough to dip and kiss down to her ear as he whispered, "Well you and I both know that the leather sees plenty of action still."
He was rewarded with a soft moan and a flush against her skin and he just chuckled, pulling away, "However, you know I can't just ignore this Felicity. If they're coming at you they want us distracted and we need to face this head on. I can't do this without you, please?"
Felicity just sighed and as he watched her worry lines began to etch across her face, "It's just been so quiet and I'm reluctant to let our peacefulness go. But I know better, you can't say no to the fight - especially not this one. I just have one condition."
He watched her intently as she held up a finger and wagged it at him, a serious expression on her face, "We do this like before - with Diggle and Roy next to you and me on the comms in the Foundry. I won't have you fighting anything alone."
Oliver took a deep breath, taking in the face of the woman he would never get tired of - his wife. "It's a deal, Mrs. Queen."
And she was temporarily disarmed, as he knew it always caused her to feel fluttery when she heard him call her that, before she turned to go back upstairs, "I'll call the boys and get them ready." She yelled down at him as she ascended.
"Good," he responded, and turned towards the storage space where he kept his old gear. He still practiced archery and combat daily - with Felicity and the others - but now it was out of habit instead of before when it was out of survival.
As he opened the old trunk he spun back to the memory ten years ago when he came home as a man filled with dark purpose - with anger and an inability to trust anyone. Felicity had changed all of that, and even though their first date had ended horribly, he meant and remembered every single word - she was the first one he saw as a person and it was that fact that led him to trust John shortly after he had met her.
Smoke wafted around him from the explosion that had knocked out his comms, separating him from his team and Felicity. He tried his best to maintain his bearings – remembering the layout of the building that his team had been lured to; he was out of practice.
"Mr. Queen, I thought we had an understanding. You were not to disrupt our business in this city, but then as soon as you came back our entire operation was dismantled in less than four years by this..Arrow. We had our suspicions, of course, given the timing."
Oliver knelt on the ground, his bow that Felicity had made so many years ago was lying on the ground more than ten feet away and he was surrounded by Bratva thugs with guns trained on him. His vision swirled as the man spoke to him, but he understood nothing.
"You were released from service to the Bratva with the warning that if you crossed us, those you loved would suffer. Unfortunately, you've lost most of them. Your Felicity, however…"
Oliver's head dipped low from the blood loss, his knees aching, but he still shook his head, "I fulfilled my end of the arrangement long ago, and if I stand in judgment of violating the arrangement then the only blood that's owed you is my own."
A fist hit his jaw sharply, "We shall see, Oliver Queen. If you are indeed responsible for the dwindling of our business the past ten years, you and your lovely wife will pay."
Oliver hit the ground hard, the force of the blow causing more blood to drip down the cuts on his face. Rolling on to his back to get back his breath, he focused on the only one that mattered right now.
"Because of the life I lead, I can't be with someone I could truly care for," he said as he watched Felicity's head tilted down to stare at her desk. She was silent as she eventually rose from her chair, deliberately not looking at him. Oliver closed his eyes as she walked right by him before he heard her speak.
"You know, you deserve better. Better than her."
He spun around at that and watched her walk away, the only thought in his mind was how he would never deserve a woman like her.
His lips lingered on hers as the sounds of the hospital faded away. Oliver cradled her head between his hands as if she was the most precious thing he could ever hold. He had watched Diggle kiss Lyla's forehead reverently as she cradled their new daughter – but the only thing on his mind was Felicity.
The images had flashed back and forth in his head - her lying on the cold slab after the explosion and cooing over a loving couple's new baby. Oliver desperately needed that with Felicity - but there was no way he could ever have both. His life just wasn't about his happiness anymore - it was about ensuring the happiness of others, even strangers in the city he called home.
He had to be the Arrow - and that meant giving up the woman whose lips were against his right now. She had known this was coming, had avoided it, but he couldn't let her go without her knowing one last thing.
"Felicity. Don't ask me to say I don't love you." He whispered as they broke apart, her face still in his hands.
He wanted to give her something to hold on to, but instead she walked away from him, her words echoing in his head. "Stop dangling maybes."
Oliver resolved to never pull her in two directions ever again - she deserved a happy life free of the love of a man who couldn't ever give her what she wanted.
He needed to keep her safe - from him, and from others.
Keep her safe. The thought swirled around his head as he managed to calm his body and pull back up to his knees.
He felt the menacing figure circle around him carefully and Oliver tried to focus on the number of enemies - knowing Diggle and Roy would eventually show up, expecting him to be prepared. The circling figure was making him even dizzier as the blood from the gunshot seeped out of his stomach.
"It is obvious, of course, that you are both Bratva and this vigilante - with you before us in such a fine suit. I wonder…did Mrs. Queen try to talk you out of coming to stop us? She seems so pure, so good. It is a shame you had to bring such darkness to her life."
Oliver winced at having his worst fears come to light – and by a complete stranger, nonetheless. The figured squatted in front of Oliver, continuing to speak, "I bet you were in communication with her tonight - she was part of your team right? We rigged up the explosion separated you and your friends with an electronic pulse that disabled your communication devices. What would she think of you, kneeling before Bratva once again, Mr. Queen?"
Oliver's thoughts drifted to their conversation earlier – the man was right.
He grabbed Oliver's chin and forced him to look at him and Oliver grit his teeth and glared, "You would do well to listen to me, Mr. Queen - The Arrow. I would like to see you dead right now, but I have other plans for you that are contingent on you living - and listening."
The enemy leered in and Oliver took his chance, head-butting him and taking him by surprise, his hands gripping the man's neck despite being slick with his own blood.
The elevator dinged and Oliver walked towards Felicity's new office - it was late, but his security clearance had never been removed thanks to Felicity. She knew they would at some point need his access again.
Diggle had been right, as he usually was - Oliver couldn't let Felicity slide past and move on from the possibility of a relationship with him; she was too important.
He turned towards the glass partitioned and saw Felicity in a gorgeous blue dress, locked in a kiss with Palmer.
Oliver stared for a few moments before turning around and leaving. He should have known - she meant what she said before about wanting more to life than what he could give her. Oliver could only ever bring her darkness.
Unfortunately what he saw now was a woman he loved moving on without him and he knew now what true heartbreak was. Laurel, Sara, all the other women he had been with and loved - none of them were Felicity; he had never been in love like this, and to see her with him...
He punched for the ground floor, a sick feeling in his stomach that wasn't cause by the elevator dropping.
Oliver sat on the steps in front of a quiet house in Starling City; it was late and he had just delivered Roy to Diggle's house for a home cooked dinner with friends. He hadn't felt much like socializing and found himself driving to the only place he knew he would find peace - Felicity's.
He knew he was asking for yet more pain as she could very well not be coming home tonight, or worse - come home with Palmer. Nevertheless here he was, sitting on her front steps, his head in his hands.
The sound of a car pulling up to the curb set him on alert and he immediately spotted Felicity's minicooper, a zippy little car that he had once hidden in, trusting her to save his life. He watched her get out of the car, flinging her purse into the backseat in what he assumed was frustration; she held her shoes in one hand and her keys in another as she walked up the sidewalk and she was a few feet in front of him before she saw Oliver.
She stopped and if she was surprised to see him there she did not show it; instead she just watched him, expecting him to start the conversation.
He stood up, feeling suddenly awkward, "I don't know what I'm doing here."
"Well that makes two of us, Oliver," she said in a clipped tone.
He winced, knowing he deserved all of her ire - especially after he had broken her again tonight with his honest conversation with Cupid - knowing Felicity could hear and understand.
She didn't have much sympathy for his pain, knowing it was all his creation and that knowledge made Oliver feel incredibly awkward in this moment.
"Felicity...I saw you tonight. With Palmer."
She raised her eyebrows in surprise and her mouth opened in a small 'o' as she knew what he was saying.
"I don't want you thinking I was spying on you, because I wasn't."
"Then what exactly were you doing, Oliver? You had no reason to be there - our mission was done," she spoke with a quiet strength and Oliver closed his eyes.
Felicity waited a few moments for him to respond before giving up and walking past him and up the few steps to her door.
"I love you."
The keys clattered against the concrete as her body went stiff in shock.
"I said it before, but it was couched in caution and strategy. I came to see you earlier to tell you that. I love you, Felicity Smoak. I love you so much I can't even imagine how I ever thought I could be without you."
He watched as she turned towards him and ran up to her as he spotted the tears splashing her face but held back touching her, not knowing if she would still want that.
"I've spent so many years just surviving, trying to be a hero so that others would be kept safe - including you," Oliver continued, the last words softening with meaning. "But I know for certain now, that if I don't have you now and in my future, I will always regret it. I want to be with you, if you'll have me."
Felicity looked down at his face, an earnest expression so apparent, "This isn't because you think I've moved on with Palmer?"
Oliver shook his head, eyes locked on hers, "I came to say this very thing and I am here now regardless of what's going on with him. If you'll still have me, I can't miss a moment of it."
Felicity just sighed and watched him for a while before turning and grabbing her purse and keys from the ground. Oliver let out a ragged breath, but before he could say anything she leapt towards him, his hands instinctively coming around her hips as her legs wrapped around him.
"Oliver, you're stubborn and noble and protective and an idiot," Felicity started and Oliver just looked at her with a baffled expression. "But I love it, and I love you too."
He grinned and wasted no time in capturing her lips again; all thoughts of bandits and Palmer were banished as they finally made it into her house and gave in to their baser instincts. But for once, Oliver was wrapped around in love and not just lust.
It was the thought of that first night with Felicity that burned in his mind as he fought the dizzying blood loss and the Bratva boss at the same time. Early during his time on the island, he and Slade had argued about love - Slade thought it was a weakness, but once upon a time Oliver considered love a strength and it was this Oliver that used his love for Felicity to power through and hold the Bratva leader as a hostage shield.
There was only one way out of the situation - stall for Diggle and Roy to make it through the debris and barricade that separated them.
The thug members were holding guns in front of him, but he held their leader. Russian curses were being flung at him, but he instead tightened his grip on the man's neck.
"I will snap his head before your bullets kill me," he warned in Russian.
"You would still die," the man in front of him rasped.
Oliver gritted his teeth, "Maybe, but at the very least word would get back to the other leaders and they would leave my city and family alone. It is the way of the Bratva: I kill you and as a member of the Bratva my family takes your place. That honor is then bestowed upon my family, which includes Bratva protection."
"You're insane if you think that would protect your pretty blonde wife," he spat. Oliver just squeezed tighter to silence him. It would protect Felicity if he killed this man, but it would also ensure his death - something she would never forgive. Her thoughts on self-sacrifice for her safety were well known, he thought wryly.
"OLIVER!" A voice shouted from his right and he relaxed only slight at the sound of Diggle's voice.
"HERE!" He called out and immediately an arrow hit one of the men nearest him and he went down, sending the others scurrying to hunt down the men who had broken through.
"We'll never stop, you know. The Bratva will always be part of this city; you will have to kill me to protect your sweet sweet Felicity."
At that, Oliver finally squeezed the man's neck and snapped his head, letting his body fall to the floor, "I've done it before."
His vision blurred as he saw John running towards him, mouthing his name.
"Oliver! Stay with me. We cleared them out and Roy is calling Captain Lance to get them arrested. The Bratva will know."
"I killed him, Digg. The Bratva…protection for my family…captain. If they return, tell them that..." Oliver swayed forward and John caught him, laying him on the ground gently.
Oliver knew he was fading; no other man would have been able to survive this long with such extensive damage. In the end, as always, Felicity was right - his wife was right; he shouldn't have done this as the Arrow.
"Oliver! Stay with me, I called Felicity and she's on her way. Stay with us, the ambulance will be here soon." Diggle's voice drifted, muted, as Oliver clung to only one word.
Felicity.
Years after that fateful night on her doorstep, Oliver had slid down onto one knee and in the most traditional way, asked her to be his wife - to seal their love forever.
She had tears in her eyes as she said yes, and they were surrounded by those they considered their closest friends - those that knew both sides of their lives. Though they were a team of more than just themselves, Oliver had realized that sharing his fears and emotions with someone else was one of the most intimate things that someone could ever do. He owed Felicity for a lot of things, but mostly he owed her his life - in every sense of the word.
They had fought against both Thea and Donna in their desire for a small wedding; both were adamant that as a scion of the Queen family tradition dictated a large affair. Felicity and Oliver, however, had put their feet down, and found themselves in a small Synagogue - homage to Felicity's Jewish roots.
Felicity agreed to a traditional wedding, if small, however she had one condition and that was kept a secret from Oliver until the double doors opened and he saw her, stunning in her cream dress as she waited a few beats for the music to filter through.
I'll unfold before you
Would have strung together
The very first words of a lifelong
Love letter
Oliver felt the words go through him and he suddenly grinned as she started walking towards him after the first verse. Everyone would understand the meaning of the lyrics, but as they stared at each other a much more private memory was playing in their mind; before her beauty and the intimacy they shared in both body and soul, he cried.
He saw her beginning to mouth the words and smiled.
Tell the world that we finally got it all right
I choose you
I will become yours and you will become mine
I choose you
Felicity had timed it perfectly, standing in front of Oliver and breaking tradition to wipe away his tears, touching his skin before they had been officially bound. This was why they had wanted a small wedding and as Thea and Donna gaped at their intimacy, they understood unequivocally that what Felicity and Oliver shared was far more profound than anyone could have predicted.
Oliver smiled and took Felicity's hand before turning to the Rabbi.
A voice brought him back from the darkness and memories, its warmth surrounding him.
"Oliver! Please wake up, please," the voice was shaky and he opened his eyes to see his wife staring down at him with tears in her eyes.
"Felicity," he whispered brokenly, his arm trying to come up to brush the tears away, but only making it a few inches. "I'm so sorry."
A sob echoed and she grabbed his hand and pressed it against her face, "Please hold on, Oliver. Diggle went to show the paramedics how to get through."
Oliver knew it was far too late and shook his head, "You'll be safe now. They can't touch a widow of the Bratva. In the end, I did what I always did..."
He coughed and Felicity cradled his head, pressing her forehead against his.
I, Felicity Smoak, take you, Oliver Queen, to be my loving husband and partner.
Their vows ran through his head as he realized she was whispering them to him through her tears, trying to keep him grounded.
To love, honor, and cherish.
He coughed, remembering the twists on their vows - identical until the very last lines. As Felicity whispered hers, he murmured his with the last of his strength.
I believed in something again. My whole heart will be yours forever. I choose you.
He heard her whisper she loved him as he drifted in and out of consciousness, felt her lips on his for the last time - mingled with her tears.
"I love you," Felicity repeated, over and over again.
"I chose you. Best decision of my life," he rasped. It had always been his worst fear – ever since he knew he was falling in love with her - her being hurt or killed because of her association with him. It had caused him to push her away for years, keeping her at arm's length. In the end, he finally got it all right with her - she showed him every day for the past ten years that love was the most healing, most powerful thing that could ever exist. The day he met her was the day he began to see people again, to see who they were really - the beginning of him trusting people other than himself. It was all Felicity. Golden haired, bubbly, whip smart, furious Felicity.
Oliver had stood at the crossroads for so long, and finally chose the path with her. He heard Felicity crying still, cradling him in her arms. "Oliver," she said with insistence. "You can't leave me yet, I haven't told you..."
He opened his eyes, wondering what secrets she could possibly have left; they were so terrible at lying to each other - it was one of the things he loved about their love.
"Oliver, I'm pregnant." She whispered softly and the words floated down, his eyes closing, his body rapidly failing him. "So you see? You can't die. We need you. I need you."
"Oh god," she sobbed as she felt his body go limp, one last breathy exhale. "NO, nonononono."
She hugged him tighter to his chest, hands covered in his blood from trying to stop the bleeding, slippery as she pulled his head to her body and sat there for the five minutes it took for Diggle and he paramedics to find them.
They stood there, looking at their new home. Oliver had decided he didn't want to spend the first few years of their marriage in the Queen mansion and he and Felicity had found a place near Diggle and Lyla's so they could see them and Sara as much as possible. The need for The Arrow had diminished greatly, Starling City no longer being a gritty bed of crime - thanks to the combined efforts of Team Arrow and Captain Lance.
"Who would have thought three years ago that we'd be standing here, looking at a house we share?" Felicity said out loud, voice holding considerable awe.
Oliver just stared at her unabashedly. "I dreamed about it."
She looked at him and rolled her eyes, "You did not, you're just too smooth for your own good, Mr. Queen."
He grinned and shook his head, suddenly picking her up and holding her bridal style. Oliver stared at her intently, "I really did dream about this, with you. It was a dream I held for so long and -"
Her finger went up to his lips, stopping him from saying anything further, "I know, but it's the past - now we get to look forward to our future."
Oliver pulled her up a little closer and kissed her sweetly, "To a grand and glorious future, Mrs. Queen."
Author's Note: So there ya go. It was a horrible idea that popped into my head after listening to I choose you by Sara Bareilles. I'm so sorry. Yell at me, I deserve it.
