Seriously, who doesn't love this ship? I haven't written anything in a while so feedback would be greatly appreciated. Enjoy!

"Jiraiya boy has died in battle"

The room was silent and the air was still. This could not be happening. Did she hear correctly? Jiraiya, that old pervert hermit could not be dead.

She was numb. She couldn't feel and she couldn't speak. All she could think about was the last conversation that they had, although neither of them believed that it would be their last. The mission that he took upon himself was definitely a dangerous one. A suicide mission, some would call it. That was exactly the reason why Tsunade did not want him to go. She was all too familiar with battles and going up against an opponent like Pain, the leader of one of the most powerful evil organizations the ninja world has ever seen, would definitely result in some serious injury or death.

"Please come back alive, Jiraiya." These words were a shock to him and even a shock to her, "If I were to lose you too I- "

"You would cry for me? That would make me happy."

She told him to come back. She couldn't bear the very thought of losing another person dear to her. Sure he was a pervert and he didn't quite grow up yet but he was her longest and best friend. She knew everything about him and he knew everything about her. They haven't seen each other for years but when he found her when she was at the lowest point in her life and brought her back to the village to take her position as Hokage, her life dramatically changed from being engulfed in pain and sadness to a life of happiness and stability. She silently thanked him for that every day. They became closer and started to go out for drinks with each other and when Shizune restricted her from drinking, they would just reminisce about the good old days when they were inexperienced genin.

"Let's make a bet then." Surely this was the only way that he could reassure her that he would be alright, "You bet that I'm going to die. After all you always lose your bets. But promise me, if I actually do manage to make it back alive…" He stared intently into her eyes. She just looked at him with wide confused eyes. She knew what he was going to say but what would she do if he actually said those words? Was she prepared for that? "I'm just kidding Tsunade. I'm actually quite grateful to you!" Of course he would laugh it off. Maybe he was afraid of getting rejected again for the millionth time.

He wanted to pursue a relationship with her from the very first day he met her but she rejected him over and over again. Maybe it was because he was a little too immature and perverted for her tastes but even when he matured into a man, still perverted but a man; she continued to render all his advances futile. However, lately she has been experiencing strong feelings towards him, feelings that she would never address.

Tsunade lost so much people in her life. She loved her little brother so much and it severely damaged her when he died. To make matters worse she fell in love and he died right in front of her after her failed attempts to heal him. This made her question her skills as a medic and she developed a phobia against blood because of it. She got over it when she had to battle Orochimaru in order to save the village and keep Naruto and his dreams alive. Now the last person who she cared for deeply died and left her too. It seems as if everyone she loves leaves her all alone with nothing but her sadness and eternal pain.

"Tsunade girl!"

The words of the elder toad pulled her out of her deep thoughts and brought her back to reality. She looked up to see her trusted assistant and apprentice Shizune looking up at her with worry and concern in her eyes and the elder toad himself who delivered this devastating news.

"I'm sorry. What were you saying?" Tsunade apologized for not paying attention and tried to keep herself together. She was the Hokage so she had to be strong right?

"You just received some terrible news Tsunade girl, its okay to be distraught but you must be strong. You have the village and its people to protect." The elder toad said simply with sympathy in his voice. He knew Tsunade since she was young because she was Jiraiya's team mate so he knew her story. He knew that Jiraiya was close to her. He wasn't just another name on the list of fallen shinobi. He was the closest person to her besides Shizune.

The wise toad relayed all the information Jiraiya left behind to her and she listened as carefully as she could. She was in mourning but she had to act as a responsible Hokage since Pain was a threat to the security of the leaf village. Then it was time to tell Naruto. Hearing the news that Jiraiya died was hard enough for her but it was going to be very hard for her to tell Naruto. She knew that Jiraiya was like a grandfather to him.

"Did you send him?" Naruto asked her while looking at the floor, trying his hardest to contain his anger towards the Hokage.

"That's right." She said simply.

He threw his tantrum and lashed out on her.

"If the pervy sage was Hokage he would never send granny Tsunade on such a dangerous mission by herself, I know it." With that he stormed out to grieve on his own.

Those words stung her. She knew that he would never send her out on a mission like that. She knew that he insisted on going but a part of her blamed herself for his death. She was the Hokage after all. She could have forbid him from going. Then again she knew that he would never listen to her. She didn't know what to think. All she could think about was the fact that her friend was dead and was never coming back. All the time they spent together, the drinks that they had, she would never get those back. All she had left were the memories of him.

Some time past and she was busy working on the information that Jiraiya left behind. Shizune came in often to check on her or to bring her more paperwork or even tea. She could see the pain in Tsunade's eyes and it hurt her to see her master going through such a hard time and pretending to be strong like it didn't faze her at all. Shizune could see behind that mask of hers.

"It's okay to be sad lady Tsunade, even if you are Hokage." Shizune said while placing a gentle hand on her master's shoulder before giving her the privacy that she needed.

When Shizune left, Tsunade got out of her chair and walked over to the window directly behind her desk. She looked out at her village and then to the ledge of the window. She remembered Jiraiya entering her office through that window. A normal person would simply knock on the door and enter but Jiraiya was not a normal person. He was an idiot, but he was her idiot. Her mind travelled to when they were kids.

The jounin in charge of placing the newly appointed genin to their teams read out the names, "And for team Hiruzen Sarutobi, Orochimaru, Jiraiya and Tsunade."

None of them knew each other so they did not know what to expect. The three kids went outside to meet their sensei and were told to introduce themselves.

"Orochimaru.", "Tsunade.", "Jiraiya." Were all the kids said but then the white haired genin got a good look at Tsunade. Her amber eyes were sparkling in the sunlight, her blonde hair was tied in a high ponytail. She was flat- chested but was beautiful in his eyes.

"Why hello there, my name is Jiraiya, you can send love letters later, nice to meet ya." He said with a sparkle in his eye and a wide grin on his face. Surely she gave him a punch but his introduction to her flattered her. From that day on they started to tease each other. Who knew that those two would become such close friends?

She couldn't hold her emotions in anymore. One single tear slid down her cheek and it was followed by another until the tears came down her cheeks like a waterfall. Memories of him flashed before her eyes and consumed her every thought. She felt as if her heart was breaking into tiny pieces. She just let it all out.

"Why did you have to leave me alone like this you dummy?" She cried then slid onto the ground and brought her legs up to her chest and buried her head in the space between them. The tears slid down her face and onto the ground. She just sat there, whispering his name over and over again as if saying his name alone would bring him back. She wished that it could.

During that time while she was in deep mourning she came to realize that she really did love that perverted idiot. But it severely hurt her when she remembered that she discovered that she was too late.

I think I'll make this into a multi chapter. I just love this ship so much!

Thanks for reading!