Disclaimer: I do not own Perception, or any of the characters I write about here.
They were sitting at the bar of their motel. It was late but none of them felt like going to bed. The case was solved and they would be returning to Chicago in the morning.
'I just have all these awful thoughts in my head. It's like a constant background noise telling me that Donnie's gonna cheat on me again.'
'Over the years I've learned that I can't make my voices go away. But I can try to figure out if they are helping me, or hurting me. And if they're not helping, I try like hell not to listen to them.'
That sure got Kate thinking. She knew she had a bad feeling about the whole Donnie-runs-for-office thing, she just didn't want to admit that she was partly the reason. Kate knew that if (or when?) Donnie cheated on her again it would be her fault as much as his. He had said once that he'd hurt her again because that's just who he is. Fooling themselves that they had both changed so much over the last year was not doing them any favors. Donnie was still amazingly good-looking and Kate still spent most nights working. What they had been through, this life-changing trauma, this whole How-could-you-You-pig-Get-out-of-my-life drama was nothing more than an episode. Some couples went through those on a regular basis. Some couples survived far worse and never even complained. She and Donnie were no heroes and they were certainly not two brand-new people who just happened to re-fall in love.
Donnie's voice mail. Kate didn't flinch. She was expecting it; after all, it was his big night and he must be busy. She already knew what she wanted to say. It was partly her fault and she wanted him to know she understood. She should try harder. She will, starting tomorrow. She will surprise him with breakfast in bed, like he often did these days. She will try to be friendly with Miss Tight Skirt and will do her best to optimize her schedule so she and Donnie can spend more alone time together. Tomorrow…
Kate looked at the sky. It was so beautiful, so peaceful. She didn't feel like sleeping. Returning to the bar, she found Daniel writing enthusiastically. He stopped and closed the book as soon as he saw her.
'No, go on, don't let me disturb you. You are obviously in your element here,' Kate joked good-humouredly.
'I'm done. Let's get going. I need to spend one more sleepless night before our lovely flight back tomorrow.'
'Daniel, why is it you are so afraid of flying?'
'I am not afraid of flying. I am afraid of being at the mercy of a couple of tons of brainless steel.'
Kate smiled at him.
'So you are sure you will not be able to sleep tonight?'
'Not unless I drug myself. And I'm not doing that for obvious reasons.'
Kate's eyes narrowed for a second. She was thinking.
'Come on then. We are going stargazing.'
'Stargazing? Kate, what are you talking about?'
'Daniel, you really have to see this. The sky is amazing.'
'Of course it is. There is hardly any artificial light around here. Did you suddenly become an astronomy enthusiast?'
'Go on, ruin my mood again.'
Daniel was about to say something else but stopped and closed his mouth. He breathed out.
'I'm sorry Kate. You know how I feel about nature and grass and bugs and…'
'I know. Just give me a minute, ok? I think I have a solution to some of your phobias.'
'Not the ones that matter, sadly,' Daniel murmured under his nose as Kate ran up the stairs to her room. She came back a couple of minutes later with a blanket in one hand and some spray in the other. Daniel had put his notebook back in his bag and was clutching his possessions, clearly ready to leave.
'You don't want to leave the bag in your room perhaps?'
'No way.'
'O-key,' Kate decided not to argue.
'What's that?' Daniel squinted at the spray bottle.
'That's mosquito repellent. It's full of chemicals, but, as a friend of mine says, 'everything is chemicals'. So you can either get them all over you or offer the bugs a free dinner.'
'You are not spraying me with that thing!'
'Fair enough. How generous of you,' Kate teased as they walked behind the motel and into the woods. They found a small opening in the trees far enough not to hear the cars on the road (there were very few of those this time of night anyway) but not too far so that they get lost. Kate cleared the twigs under their feet and spread the blanket on the grass, then sat on its left side and started spraying her hands and face with the bug repellent. Daniel was trying to pull the collar of his coat as close to his neck as possible, then pushed his hands deep in his pockets and sat on her right.
'Lie down,' Kate instructed, pulling him back with her. Daniel jerked free, then rearranged his coat and slowly lowered himself on the blanked beside her. They looked at the stars for a couple of minutes in silence. When Daniel spoke, his voice was unusually calm, almost sweet.
'I wish I could dazzle you with my knowledge of constellations and distances, and magnitude, and mythology…' He trailed off.
'You have been dazzling me with your knowledge my whole adult life, Daniel. Feel free to take a break.' Kate sneaked a peak at him and grinned. 'Daniel Pierce, do I see you blush?'
'You can't see me, Kate. It's dark.'
'Not that dark, apparently,' Kate giggled softly. 'It was unintentional.'
'What?'
'Making you uncomfortable. I try hard not to do it, you know. Good thing we are alone here.'
'Yes, this is good.'
They fell silent again. Then Kate sighed.
'You told me to figure out if the voices are trying to help. The thing is, I kinda believe them. And I feel guilty.'
'You feel guilty because of your intuition? Kate, you are a cop, you are supposed to trust your gut.'
'No, I know that. I feel guilty because it'd be my fault. If Donnie did it again, I mean. I… I neglect him sometimes.'
'You sometimes put your work first, that's all.'
'I always put my work first.'
'You always have. That hasn't changed. And it hasn't stopped Donnie from wanting to marry you… twice now,' there was a sly smile in Daniel's voice. Kate wondered what his face looked like when he said things like that. He so rarely smiled. 'Still, don't listen to me,' Daniel continued, 'I am the nutty professor who spent half his life in an all-consuming relationship with a hallucination.' The smile was gone from his voice now.
'Do you miss her?'
Daniel sighed. 'Of course I do. She's the only woman who can put up with me.'
'You know that's not true, right?'
'Please, Kate, spare me the whole you-will-meet-a-nice-woman-one-day lecture. I might be delusional but I am not desperate.'
'This is not what I meant,' Kate sounded hurt. Daniel turned to look at her. She was just a faint dark shadow against the trees. Her eyes were sparkling, as if… did he see a tear in there?
Kate went on. 'I never was the feminine type. Christ, I became a cop. But one would expect that at 32 I will at least qualify as a woman.'
Daniel was confused. Kate had explicitly said she had no romantic interest in him. She even got engaged to a different man. He was obviously reading her wrong. Maybe he should just let it slide. He looked back up at the sky. 'You do qualify as a woman, Kate. You always have. But you are more than this and… I am just trying to do you justice, ok?' He looked back at her. Kate was watching him with what seemed to be a childish grin on her lips.
'I am just messing with you, Dr. Pierce. Relax, I am not going all sweet on you again. That ship has sailed.' and, before Daniel could get disappointed, added, 'How are the mosquitoes doing?'
'I think they managed to sneak through my pocket,' Daniel answered and produced his left hand from his pocket, as if Kate would be able to see the bite marks.'
'In that case, Dr. Pierce, I think you need better armor,' said Kate, taking Daniel's hand in hers and turning back at the sky. 'Come on now, dazzle me with your astronomical knowledge.'
