It's been two weeks since the entire planet went down in a flaming blaze, and I've still found absolutely nothing except a few cockroaches. With nothing else to do, I've been following this one particular cockroach around for a while. He (at least I think it's a male) seems to have more personality than the rest of the cockroaches around here, he's always jumping around and running over my feet in a playful manor. I've named him Sam and he's be come a sort of pet for me. He scampered off down the dark alley the other day, I might investigate and see what's over there today. It's an intimidating alley, it always has this strange glow coming from the other end and it feels very warm in the area around it. I'm half convinced it just leads straight to the worst death I could ever imagine.

I'm off to investigate the alley now and it seems that Sam has decided to tag along, he should keep me from getting bored if it turns out to be nothing. It's really dark in this alley, yet it seems that everything is glowing orange. I can feel the heat getting more and more intense as I travel along. I can no longer see the area I've called home for the past few weeks, though I don't feel I'm making any progress towards the other end of the alley. Perhaps this is someone's idea of a nasty trick, and I'm now stuck here forever.

I've finally done it! With Sam leading the way, I've reached the other end of the alley. I can't believe what I'm seeing! Everything on this side is glowing with hot, bright orange flames as far as I can see. Sam is scampering around excitedly in every direction, unsure of which way he should investigate first. He seems to be staying close by my feet, so close that I have to be careful not to step on him. I have a bad feeling he may know something about this place that I don't know.

I've come to the top of a hill and can only stare at what's in front of me. Sam has crawled up my pants in an effort to escape, making it impossible for me to stand still. I would probably do the same to him if I could. What lays in front of me is a charred, burning pile of what appear to be wrestling rings, I'm moving closer to get a better look. Unbelievable! On top of the pile of rings lays one giant cockroach with an extremely evil looking face. I may be going crazy from the heat, but I could swear I've seen it's face somewhere before. The most astonishing thing is that he's sitting contently eating Twinkies. Who knew, at the end of the world, there's still Twinkies. I always knew those things were packed with chemicals.

Sam has come out from my pants now and has a very strange and confused look on his face now, almost as if he's trying to wake himself up from a dream. If cockroaches could talk, I'm sure he'd ask me what was going on right now. The cockroach in the ring is now moving. Wait, I know that walk! No, it can't be! Sam seems to have realized it as well, as he's back in my pants. That cockroach is Vince McMahon! He seems to have spotted me and is now aiming a cannon in my direction! I'm trying to escape back through the alley, but it's been blocked by the most terrifying image I can imagine. It's been blocked by a giant Randy Orton inflatable doll. This seems to be the end for me. Vince as lit the cannon, there is a very large object flying through the air in my direction in the shape of...

These were the last words of one poor man who manages to survive the end of the world, but he couldn't survive the worst. His remains were found in a giant crater that resembled John Cena. The only possession he had were his clothes and a cockroach. The Vince McMahon cockroach of which he speaks was never found.