I walked silently into the cemetery in the pouring rain. How appropriate. My rain coat pulled tightly around me though the freezing water still seemed to penetrate it. I kept my head low and tried my best to keep the long silver colored box from getting wet by clutching it under my coat. I don't know why I came here every year. It only brought back memories...the kind that hurt to remember. Honestly, why did I insist on tormenting myself and never moving on? But I just couldn't stop myself. Not after all these years.

Lightning flashed and the sky lit up for a split second and I could see the many rows of headstones and memoirs that lined the grounds. It's easy enough to find the one I'm looking for as I've came many times before; 3rd section, 14th row back, and the fifth one over. This is the only day I ever step foot in this wretched place throughout the year and on each visit there're more headstones. Some many lives.

You may wonder why why a guy like me, an evil, animal killer that no one loves or let alone even likes would even be doing here. Well it's a long story...

See, it all goes back to when I was younger and more open and when I definitely had more hair. Back then, I was free to love things besides food. I had friends, at least, and I wasn't known as a endangered species eater with every environmentalist on the planet after my hide. No, back then things were different and I miss my old life terribly. Its all connected to this resting place of someone I loved and that night.

I remember the horrifying night like it had happened only within the last few hours and it still hurt. It hurt so much. Such a perfect night turned into a disaster. And the worst of it was that it was all my fault.

Why did it have to be me? Why Clara?

Clara. My Clara.

She loved animals. I couldn't for the love of food figure out why. I still can't. Those creatures. All of them strange. Sure, there were the regular ones like maybe dogs and cats, but then there were the ones she liked and worked with. Zebras. Lions. Elephants. Monkeys. Snakes...most any exotic animal you could think of. The all had long, weird names that definitely fit them and they were in every color of the rainbow and beyond, for that matter. I've even seen her with a leopard once.

Clara was a vet who loved animals more than anything. And she was the love of my life. But fate always hurt those I was ever close to and I will not make that mistake again. I can never make a mistake like that again...never love anyone ever again.

After the...incident, I would never be the same. That one day that changed my life for the worst.

It was an ironically beautiful evening on that day in April, longer ago than I can recall the exact date. It was one of those cloudy days, but beautiful all around none the less...

*Nearly 30 Years Ago*

Today was the day! It was absolutely perfect. Today...my life would econe complete. I was so giddy with joy. Nothing could ruin it! I had just purchased the most beautiful ring for the love of my life:Clara. My Clair! She was the most wonderful woman in the world! As I left the jeweler's, I practically danced down the street. Every so often, I'd get a strange look from a passerby. Okay, maybe I shouldn't be too hopeful. I still had to ask her and she'd still have to answer. I had it all planned out! I'd propose to her that evening.

I was already dressed up as I was attending the Documentarian Awards with her. With the connections I had, I was able to make it so that I'd go backstage, she'd be called up, and I'd come out to propose! It was perfect. It would be perfect if she said yes. The worst possible case wouldn't be if she said no. It'd be if she said no and never wanted to see me again. But that couldn't happen...right?

I walked up to her house on Civil Street. I tugged at my collar. I wasn't use to these monkey suits. Also, I was nervous. What if tonight didn't go as planned? Last chance to back-

"Hey! There you are. C'mon in, I'm almost ready. Door's open!"

Down. Clair cut my thoughts off by poking her head out of the window, seeing me.

Well, there went my chance. Now there's no going back. I stuck the ring box carefully into my pocket and pulled out the white rose I'd gotten as a separate gift. She loved white roses.

I walked up the steps and went inside. Clair's bird, conveniently named Chitter, was chatting up a storm when she saw me. She whistled at me as she always did when I visited. "Hey, fatso! Lover boy! Love love love!"

I rolled my eyes and tried ignoring the parrot. It made kissing sounds at me and continued squawking on. It said something about me being compared to an over-weight hippo and I sent it a half-hearted glare. "I am not fat, bird! I'm actually very lean"

My glare didn't intimidate it like I'd hoped. It actually seemed to egged the annoying bird on. I was about to go over and would have guiltlessly strangled it when Clair came down the stairs. I looked up, about to tell her about the parrot's rude words, but whatever I was going to say was lost.

I was awestruck. She was absolutely beautiful. I couldn't remember a time when I'd seen her in a dress, usually it was jeans and a cute top, and this one on her was just...wow.

Clair had on a scarlet knee length dress that had one strap going across her shoulder. The skirt of it had slight ruffles and a golden lining to the skirt's end. Her black hair was flowing like it always did when she walked and all I could do was stare, probably with a dumb look on my face.

"You're early!" She said walking down to me with her ever bright smile, breaking my trance. She gave me a hug and I realized she was taller. The red sling back heels she was wearing gave her an extra inch, but I was still taller at 5'9. She also smelled like citrus. It was...nice.

"So...y-you ready to go?" I asked, mentally slapping myself for my voice cracking.

"Yes! Oh, wait let me go grab my purse. It has our invitations. Be right back!"

I nodded and watched her got around the corner. I sighed and leaned against the wall. I still held the rose in my hand, twirling it a bit. I'd give it to her on the way.

"Clair and lover boy sitt'n in a-"

"Quiet!" I yelled, really aggravated, in the birds face. Though I really wasn't as bothered with it anymore.

XXX

We had decided to walk just because it was nicer. It was cool outside for April and the pre-rain wind was blowing cold air which didn't exactly make it any warmer. Clair was freezing and I gave her my jacket I was wearing.

"But then you'll be cold" she tried to give it back, but I just shrugged putting it over her shoulders.

"Eh. I'm fine, really. I've still got these sleeves. You needed it more. And by the way..."

I pulled out the rose I'd been concealing for awhile now. One of its thorns pricked my finger and I let out a quiet "ouch"

"Oh..." she sighed looking at it then at me. I just grinned.

She took it and smiled, pecking me on the cheek and I blushed tomato red. No matter how many times she did that, it always managed to make me light up and looking like a strawberry.

We walked slowly, having over an hour's time to get there. As we strolled taking the path through the park, a plus to walking instead of driving, we talked and laughed and shared memories. It showered a bit and she opened her umbrella.

Clara linked her arm around mine and put her head on my shoulder. I smiled putting my arm around her, happy to just be spending the evening with her. I listen while she went on excitedly about her animals and all the different types of creatures she'd seen on her travels as a vet and the ones she kept at home. I didn't know what she saw in them, really. They were just animals.

I teased her, calling her animal girl. Yeah, I know. Not the most original nickname ever, but it made her smile. I loved her smile.

After a near thirty minute walk, we finally made it to the building they were holding the awards in. As we walked inside, I looked around at the expensive decor. Diamonds, gold, and stones of all colors seemed to be on everything in the hall. If this was an animal awards, then why was the place so fancy? It looked more like some over-the-top ballroom. As it turns out, the manager this year was a very wealthy environmentalist.

And his wife had been the one to decorate the main hall. The room where everything was being held was a lot more discrete with the extravagant use of gold shavings on the floor.

It was a lot like a movie theatre without the rows of seats. More like a large, leveled auditorium.

Tables with red and royal blue cloths where spread out and most of the guests here looked like they had more than a few thousand in their pockets as well, if you catch my drift.

All in all, I felt completely out of place. Among this crowd, I was an outsider. Clair on the other hand seemed perfectly at home. A few people waved to her, some asked her how she was. Aparently she was more famous around here than I thought. Some people even sent me some looks and smiles.

This one large, well built man in a royal blue suit came striding up to us. The man had a proud demeanor and the way he carried himself showed it. He was slightly intimidating from my view, but I wasn't gonna let him know that. He introduced himself to me as Will "S.D." Tucker, owner of some large chain of stores all over. The tall, brown haired businessman greeted Clair, kissing her hand. His thick, curled mustache was very distracting. However I snapped out of my trance state when I heard something about me.

Will walked up to me and found I was much shorter than him. Probably by an inch or two...or three. Okay, so the guy was huge. I tried to stand straight to make myself somewhat bigger, but it didn't make a difference.

I could practically see the egotistical air glowing about him. He went to pat me on the back and knocked the wind out of me. He evidently worked out often. It took me a moment to recover. I stalled a bit, straightening my tie, and put on a forced smile. He led us to our table and I was relieved when he went to go tend to other guests.

I spotted my best friend Calvin waving at me.

"Hey! Mandi!" I never liked the nickname he gave me, but it was better than being called GASTON Gourmand. How terribly ironic that my name meant 'person who loves food'...

Calvin walked up to us, his jet black hair covered slick with gel was long, almost down to his neck which in my opinion was too long. He nodded to Clair, "Clara. Lovely, as usual"

She giggled. I smirked, "Calvin. Still need to get a haircut, I see"

He ignored my greeting and sat down at our table with Lisa, his girlfriend. While the girls started their own conversation, Calvin leaned in and talked low so the girls- Clara more so- wouldn't overhear, "How've you been? Are you...ready for the show?"

I knew exactly what he meant by that. Everyone in the room was in on the little surprise but Clara. I gave him a crooked smile, slightly unsure. "A little nervous"

We'd been friends since 3rd grade and we'd grown a strong bond over time. We were pretty much brothers.

He gave me a pat on the back and his light blue eyes gave a look that said everything was gonna be okay. Ah, typical, Calvin. Always looking for the best in everything and thinking on the bright side. He always gave me the assurance I needed, but couldn't give myself.

I smiled, relaxing. I knew he'd be there for me. We'd been through so much over that past almost 20 years. I'd even been the one to get him the love of his life which would be Lisa.

As everyone arrived and settled down into their seats, the program was announced to have started.

"Ladies and gentlemen!"

The quiet murmurs in the room ceased and everyone's attention was drawn to the stage as the lights dimmed down making it almost dark aside from the bright stage lights centered on the man who probably arranged the event. David Browser. Yeah, that was his name. And Gaylord Nelson was another associate with him.

Once it was quiet, the tall man continued. "Thank you. I would first like to say, welcome to our seventh annual Nature Documentarian Awards. We have much planned for this evening"

'I'll say' I thought to myself sneaking a glance towards Clair.

This might actually turn out well.

I couldn't of been more wrong.

A/N:oh yes I did :P I made a villain love story (aren't there some others on the archive?) I've had this written down for the past few months and decided to publish it just because. Dunno if I'll continue, or finish, but I put it here anyways. Depends on if it gets good feedback. Anyway tell me what you thought. Like it? Hate it? Let me know!

~Water F. Thirteen