"SURPRISE!" Wendy barely had time to react before she felt a pair of arms wrap around her. A painful pricking sensation covered her body, inciting a yelp. She instinctively threw off her attacker.

"Ow!" cried a familiar, raspy voice. Wendy turned around and sighed in relief.

"Webber, I told you not to sneak up on me like that."

The spider-boy jumped to his feet, rubbing the back of his head. "Sorry! But we just wanted to give you a hug!"

"I've told you not to do that either." Wendy said, sitting back down.

Wendy liked Webber, she really did. But he could get a little touchy-feely. The fact that he was covered in itchy, prickly spider hairs didn't exactly make things better.

Webber sat down next to Wendy on the grass, smiling happily as per usual. "What are you doing?"

"Sulking over the futility of life."

"Aww!" Webber pouted. "But you do that every day!"

"That's because every day only manages to further prolong my empty and meaningless existence."

"Ooh! We found a knife this morning! We can play your favourite game! 'Stab The Automaton'!"

Wendy perked up immediately.

It was true. Inflicting pain on WX-78 was one of the few things that brought her satisfaction in the Danteesque hellscape she had found herself in.

"Why not? It may serve as a nice distraction from my constant state of despair."

"We'll take that as a yes!" Webber exclaimed, handing her the knife. "By the way, do you think it hurts WX when we stab them?"

"Of course not!" Wendy said, casually swinging the knife around to get a sense of its weight. "We've been over this, Webber. Stabs are like tickles to robots."

"But then why do they shout all those bad words?"

"Swears of jubilation, I can assure you." Wendy said offhandedly, tucking the knife away.

A small part of Wendy felt guilty for lying to Webber. He was so naive and trusting and kind that it felt wrong to take advantage of him.

But then again... it was WX.

She didn't like WX.

Like, at all.

"Well, OK then!" Webber said. "You're the smart one!"

The two friends had scarcely made it halfway down the hill before Webber stopped. "Oh! We almost forgot!" He said hastily, pulling out what seemed like a bundle of grass. He excitedly thrust one of them into Wendy's hands and upon closer inspection she found that it was actually a band, woven together from multiple strips of grass.

"We made these for you!" Webber said, bouncing up and down.

"Wow. Grass. I am amazed." Wendy deadpanned.

"No silly!" Webber laughed. "These are friendship bracelets!"

Wendy felt her heart sink. "Friendship bracelets?"

"Yep!" Webber excitedly tied his bracelet around his wrist. "People will see our matching bracelets and they'll know that the two of us are best friends forever!"

But Wendy wasn't listening. Her mind was too busy drowning in a flood of painful memories.

Here you go Wendy! Now we have matching friendship bracelets! Mine's still prettier though. Ow! Ha ha! What? It's totally true!

"Abigail..." Wendy whispered to herself.

"Oh don't worry!" Webber exclaimed. "We made one for Abigail too! Of course it's gonna be tricky getting her to wear it, since she's all... ghosty and stuff."

"Webber, I can't take this."

Webber froze. "Oh." He said, with a mix of surprise and poorly-concealed disappointment. "Um... is it because you don't like the colour? Because we can make it different if you-"

"No, Webber, it's not that. It's just..." Wendy bit her lip as she searched for the best way to phrase her thoughts "I just don't see the point of giving any sense of emotional attachment to such superficial ornaments."

"Uh... they're supposed to be symbols of our friendship! To show everyone that we're best friends forever!"

"But what's the point of a symbol if its meaning is bound to fade?"

Webber scratched his head. He often had trouble understanding Wendy whenever she got too poetic. "Uh... what?"

"This bracelet is meant to be a symbol of our friendship, so when that ends, it'll ultimately become a meaningless reminder of what we once had." Wendy explained. "The bracelet will only have meaning until the day you inevitably leave my side."

"Wait... leave?" Webber's mind was racing. "Who said anything about leaving? We're not going to leave!"

"But you will. Eventually." Wendy sighed. "It's not your fault, everyone leaves eventually. That's why I don't think there's any need for these silly bracelets."

"Wendy, we're... we're not going to leave you! We told you, we're going to be best friends forever!"

Best friends forever...

"I appreciate the thought Webber..." Wendy placed the bracelet in the spider-boy's palm and closed his fingers around it.

"...but I've heard that line before."

Wendy sighed. "Sorry Webber, I don't think I'm in the mood to play right now. I think... I think I'd much rather be alone." With that, Wendy marched back up the hill, leaving the poor boy alone in cold, confused silence.


Wendy sat down to wallow in her own melancholic thoughts. When will I learn? She wondered. I've been down this path before. I know where it leads. So why do I still try?

She dragged her gaze to the flower in her hands. Every time she looked at it it seemed to wilt just a little bit more.

"Oh Abigail..." Wendy whispered, but she knew that Abigail couldn't hear her. Her sister would arise whenever she was summoned, which was usually when Wendy required protection from whatever monster had decided to attack the camp.

But until then the flower was just an agonising reminder of the pain and suffering that came with caring for someone.

Wendy instinctively wiped the tears from her eyes. The action had practically become routine at this point.

Best friends forever. Wendy wished she could be like Webber. She wished she could still believe in things like that. But she knew better. In time, everyone leaves. And when they do you're left with nothing but a stabbing pain in your heart.

So why bother...


"I don't get it. What did we do wrong?"

"Maybe she just doesn't like bracelets."

"No, she would have said so."

"Hmm... what was that she said again? After we told her we would be best friends forever?"

"I think it was... 'I've heard that lime before'. What do you think that means?"

"I think it means... she doesn't believe us."

"You mean she thinks we're... a liar?"

"I DON'T KNOW!" Both of Webber's halves were getting worried at this point.

"No! I won't let Wendy think that we're a liar! We just have to think of some way to prove that we're going to be friends with her forever."

"Let's eat her."

"WHAT?!"

"It worked for us!"

"That's different."

"I don't know, maybe it'll work!"

"WE ARE NOT EATING WENDY."


Wendy stumbled along blindly, as Webber guided her by hand.

"Webber, how much further do we have to walk?"

"Almost there! Just a couple more steps!"

"Is the blindfold really necessa-"

"We're here!" Webber exclaimed. "Ta-da!"

"Webber, I'm still wearing the blindfold."

"Oh! Sorry!" Webber fumbled with the knot for a while and curtain of spider silk loosened and fell away. As Wendy's eyes adjusted to the bright orange light of the setting sun she found herself in the presence of an enormous looming tombstone.

The tombstone was wider than it was tall, and lacked any elaborate carvings or designs. It was a simple rectangular slab of grey rock that arched slightly along the top. Engraved into the stone were three short words: "Here Lies Craig" The name Craig however, had been clumsily crossed out in red crayon. Hastily scribbled next to it were the words "Wendy and Webber: Friends Forever".

"Ta-da!" Webber grinned. "Do you like it?"

Wendy narrowed her eyes and tilted her head in confusion. "So... you desecrated a grave for me?"

"What? No! Um... we mean... yes? We think? Uh..." Webber scratched his head. "What does 'desecrate' mean?" He asked sheepishly.

"It means to treat something sacred in a disrespectful or sacrilegious manner."

"Oh. Then... probably." Webber frowned. "What were we talking about again? Oh right! The gravestone!" His smile quickly returned to his face. "Well, earlier we told you that we were going to be best friends forever. But you didn't believe us! So we made this to prove it!" As if to demonstrate how to use the gravestone, Webber lay down in front of it, facing the sky, his head resting in the tombstone's shadow.

"This is proof that we're going to be friends forever! No matter what happens, we're going to stick by your side! All the way until the day we both die!" Webber stuck his tongue out and made a brief choking noise, simulating his own death.

Under normal circumstances, this would have been where Wendy would make a snide comment about Webber's naivety. But for some reason this time, she found that she couldn't. She opened her mouth to speak, but immediately caught sight of Webber's smile and found that the words got stuck in her throat.

"And I made sure to find an extra wide tombstone, so when that happens, they'll bury us next to each other right here, so you'll never be alone!"

The entire idea was patently ludicrous. And yet... Wendy couldn't find it in her heart to tell him that. She thought about what Webber was saying. He had basically just promised to accompany her throughout his life. To waste his short, already insignificant lifespan on her and her alone.

All because she was his friend.

It was unfathomably dumb.

But also... sweet.

Emotions began welling up in Wendy's chest. Emotions that she wasn't used to experiencing.

"Even when our bodies start turning into gross stinky black underground mush and mushrooms start popping out of our eyes or whatever, we'll still be right here with you, every step of the way!"

Webber sat back up and gave Wendy a big, wide grin. "Because best friends forever means best friends forever!"

Webber faltered as he noticed the tears trickling down Wendy's face.

"Webber..."

"Oh no. Oh no no no no no." Webber muttered, scrambling to his feet. "We're sorry Wendy! We didn't mean to-"

Wendy raised her hand and wiped the tears from her face. She was no stranger to tears, but these tears felt... unfamiliar. Unfamiliar... but not really bad.

"It's... wonderful, Webber." She said quietly. "Thank you."

The spider-boy breathed a sigh of relief. "So..." he said, awkwardly digging his toes at the ground. "...does this mean you'll wear the friendship bracelet?"

Webber held out the ugly strip of grass in his hands. That's all it was wasn't it? An ugly strip of grass?

Not to Webber.

She took the bracelet and in a few twists, their friendship was sealed.

You know for an ugly strip of grass, it feels... nice. She thought. Then again, maybe that was just the big dumb smile on Webber's face.

"Best friends forever?" He asked, his voice full of hope.

A tiny gem of a smile lit up Wendy's face and Webber felt like his hearts were going to burst with happiness.

"Best friends forever." She agreed.

Suddenly Webber found himself pulled into a warm embrace.

Webber's bristly spider hairs still stung and irritated her skin, but strangely enough, Wendy found that she didn't mind at all.

I suppose some things in life are just worth the pain, she thought.

And Webber was definitely one of those things.

She pulled away from Webber, still wearing her smile. Webber responded with a big toothy grin. "Now come on." Wendy said, pulling out a knife and twirling it in her hand. "Let's go stab the automaton."

"Yay!"