Authors Note: I know this is probably not what anyone really wanted as my next story, but this is what happened to come out of my brain today. I've been having major writer's block, but I really do have some more ideas for stories that I want to write for your guys! It's just so hard to get up the motivation to write them, ya know? Anyways, about this little story. This is not supposed to be serious AT ALL. This was written while I was playing with my action figures. Haha. I have 4 CM Punk action figures, and one Cena (only because he came with one of the Punks). I started posing them and then the story was writing itself in my mind, and slowly became a little, crappy story. I figured it's good enough to post, I guess, but I don't blame anybody if you guys think it sucks, I literally just wrote it five minutes ago. If you want to see the photo that inspired this story, please go here: "i imgur com/0HZmI jpg" (replace spaces with periods, no quotes) I'll try to write something a little less... weird, soon. hahaha I hope you enjoy. Oh and please please please don't be offended by the use of "faggot," I just felt that it fit.

CM Punk was worried about his WWE Championship for the first time in a long while. Fucking John Ass Cena was now trying to get his hands on it, and as everyone who watches WWE knows: LOLCENAWINS.

Punk thought to himself for a moment, while he sipped on a can of Diet Pepsi.

I was so much better when I first started out in WWE. I was quicker, I hit harder, and I wasn't as old. I feel like an AARP recipient on some days. I kind of miss my long hair, too.

Maybe, if I could somehow use a time machine and bring my former selves to 2012, we could all gang up on Cena, and teach him a real lesson. Even Super Cena can't beat FOUR CM Punks.

As luck would have it, even though luck is for losers, Punk's best friend Colt Cabana was not only an awesome wrestler, he just also happened to be working on a time machine! Wow what a coincidence!

Punk waited until Colt had to go work some marks at a show, and snuck into his place to use the time machine. With the devious smirk on his face, Punk worked on the controls until he was able to retrieve various living, breathing versions of his past self.

Standing before him were three different versions of himself, all happened to have long hair. Thankfully they were all wearing different colored trunks or else this could get confusing. The long haired Punk with black trunks with white stars was similar in attire to the real Punk, but it was okay because current Punk has short hair, and their trunks are of slightly different design.

As weird as this whole situation was, they all agreed on their hatred for John Cena. Four CM Punks against one Cena? Count everybody in.

Punk (the real one) waited for Cena in the parking lot after Raw one night, the other Punks in tow. When they saw him, all the Punks jumped Cena and dragged him into the back of an unmarked van, driving off into the night.

Once they had arrived at their location, the Punks took Cena out of the back of the van. They took turns kicking him as he lied on the ground, sputtering and choking back screams. Not only was this terrifying for John, it was also confusing. Four CM Punks?

The real Punk soon tired of just physically hurting Cena, though, and decided to humiliate him even more.

"Jack yourself off." Punk then spat on his face, showing him he means business.

"W-Why?" Cena managed, looking away from them all in shame.

"Because I know that will break you down, do to anything gay. Not just in front of ONE of me, but in front of FOUR of me. And plus, you always get a hard on during our matches anyways. I know how hot you are for me, Cena. Well, now there's four of me here for you to look at. I can see you getting hard already."

Punk was right, Cena was starting to enjoy this sort of abuse, if the tent forming in his jorts was any indication.

Cena reluctantly started stroking himself, while all the CM Punks smirked, watching him. A single tear dripped down his face as he fought to not look at any of them, but occasionally a Punk would kick him and demand "LOOK AT ME" and so he had to.

Cena wanted this over as soon as possible, so he quickly jerked himself hard.

The real Punk, standing at Cena's head while wearing the title around his waist, kicked Cena's head to face him and bent over him, menacingly.

"Are you going to show me the respect I deserve now, Johnboy? Are you going to cum all over yourself wishing that me and me and me and me were the ones making it happen? Are you going to, faggot?"

Hearing Punk call him a faggot drove Cena over the edge, and he came all over his hand and chest.

"That's what I thought. How fucking pathetic. Clean yourself up and find your own way home."

And with that, the four CM Punks left Cena lying there, confused and humiliated.