A/N: I came up with this when yet another one of my english teachers made me writh an I Am poem. I HATE I am poems. They are stupid and corny.
If you have ever watched an english dubbed version of Naruto, then you'll know that Naruto always says "BELIEVE IT!" Yeah, it's horrible. Anyway, this poem is making fun of that.
Once upon a time in a place called Konoha, a little boy in an odd orange suit sat weeping in the swings. By now, everyone had gotten used to the sight. Naruto always went there to cry about nothing. He seemed to think that no one could see him hidden in the shady shadows of the trees. Regrettably, the unfortunate color of his garments will shine luminous even in the deepest, darkest pits of hell. It was a highlighter orange after all. And everyone knew that highlighters have an unnatural light all to their own. Everyone, that was, except for Naruto, because he had declared himself a SKEPTICAL CYNIC.
So everyone stayed clear of him.
Except for Iruka. Iruka felt that he should be the good guy. One day, he came to Naruto and said, "Hey Naruto! I think I know how you can become less depressed. How about you write an I Am poem!!!"
He grinned at Naruto expectantly.
However, instead of leaping up joyfully, and crying out Yes, yes! Yes, Iruka! You're ingenious! I'll write this poem, and become a REAL BOY and be happy again! Naruto, instead, crossed his arms and glared. "I'm not writing some stupid poem," he grumped. "I want Ramen."
Iruka was dumbstruck. But then, he had an idea. A sly glint came into his eye.
"Hey Naruto," he said craftily, "I bet you can't write poems at all. That's why you're refusing to write the I Am poem."
"I can too write poems," Naruto protested.
"Yeah, right," Iruka said, sneering.
"Watch me! Believe It!!!" Naruto declared.
""Okay." Iruka smiled triumphantly. "I'll give you three days! Belie – Oh drat, your catchphrase is catching on!" With that, he hurried away…
I AM NARUTO!!! (BELIEVE IT! version)
I am Naruto! BELIEVE IT!!! >.
I wonder why I say BELIEVE IT!!! after every single sentence I say.
I hear myself rudely farting in Kiba's face. BELIEVE IT!!!
I see bandages on everyone and Sakura's abnormal pink hair. BELIEVE IT!!!
I want to become Hokage. BELIEVE IT!!!
I am Naruto! BELIEVE IT!!! .
I pretend that the milk is not expired. BELIEVE IT!!!
I feel Heroic! BELIEVE IT!!!
I touch EVERYONE. No one can hate me once I get through with them, because I'm just UNNATURALLY CHARISMATIC!!! BELIEVE IT!!!
I worry that enemy ninjas won't be blind and see my highlighter orange sweat suit! BELIEVE IT!!!
I cry when people hurt me. ALL THE TIME! BELIEVE IT!!!
I am Naruto! BELIEVE IT!!! .
By this time, Naruto was getting kind of tired of all the corny phrases he had to fill in. So he decided to finish the poem once and for all…
I understand BELIEVE IT!!!
I say BELIEVE IT!!!
I dream BELIEVE IT!!!
I try to BELIEVE IT!!!
I hope that people will BELIEVE IT!!!
I am Naruto! BELIEVE IT!!!
Iruka read the poem, then looked up. "Why," he asked, rather plainly, "Are there so many BELIEVE IT!!!'s in this poem?"
"Because there just is. BELIEVE IT!" Naruto said.
"Fine. BELIE – er – I mean, you're a horrible poet," Iruka said.
"It's your fault you made me write that stupid poem," Naruto pointed out. "BELIEVE IT!"
So Iruka never made Naruto write another I Am poem ever again. In fact, he had forgotten all about Naruto. Another little lonely boy had caught his eye. This boy had weird hair, and his name was Sasuke…