Caught in a Closet, a tokyo mew mew fanfic

Due to the dark premise of my main fanfic, I decided to write something funny staring Pudding and Tart.

Pudding: Yay! A story staring me and Tar-Tar na no da!

Please note I do not own Tokyo Mew Mew.

Tart: What, no DBZ Abridged joke?

If I did, there would be comedic overload.

Tart: No fair!

"When is he going to get here? It feels like forever," Pudding whined as she waited impatiently by the door.

"It's only been twenty minutes," declared Mint, sitting in her usual spot sipping her usual tea.

"It's nice to see her play with someone her age, even if he is an alien," Lettuce said to herself as she set tables.

"As long as Kish doesn't bring him," Ichigo sighed. "Zakuro, are you going to make a comment, or are you just going to brood in the corner all day?"

*brood*

"I thought so."

"You know I don't pay you to have play dates," Shirogane said with his arms crossed.

"Relax, Ryou. Here, how about you have some cake," Akasawa replied with a slice of cake in his hands.

Just then, the door opened.

"He's here! He's here na no da!" Pudding then realized who it was. "Oh, it's just you, Masaya-oniisan."

"Hello, Pudding. Is Ichigo here?"

"I'm right here, Masaya." Ichigo walked over to him and placed his arms around his shoulders.

"Are you ready for our date?" He asked her.

"The thing is, I haven't really told Shirogane about it," Ichigo replied, looking to her boss.

"It's not like any work's going to get done anyway, Goat Head."

"What?"

"Go ahead."

And with that Ichigo and Masaya left.

"I suppose you three want the day off as well," Shirogane turned to the rest of them.

"I'm fine where I am," Mint said.

"So am I," Lettuce seconded the notion.

*brood*

Then the door opened a second time.

"He's here! He's here! For real this time na no da!" Pudding pounced on Tart, clinging on to him tightly.

"Hey, get off me!" the small alien shouted.

"Oh, don't you be such a baby," Kish said bemused. "You're lucky to get a girl like that at all, wouldn't you agree, Pie?"

*brood*

"Speaking of luck and girls, has anyone seen koneko-chan?"

"Ichigo went on a date with Aoyama," Mint answered.

"Well then, it looks like I'm off. Tootles!" Kish flew off in search of the two.

"Should someone help them?" Lettuce asked nervously.

"They'll be fine," Mint replied. "It would be two against one anyway."

"Come on Tart, let's go have some fun." Pudding tightly grabbed his arm and pulled him away.

"Hey! Wait! Where are we going?"

"Aauuugh! It sickens me," Mint said frustrated.

"What does, Mint-san?" asked Lettuce.

"Seeing my Oneesamma with…with…him."

*brood*

"It just makes me so jealous. What does he have that I don't?"

"You mean, besides man parts?"

"I don't need those to give her the pure love that only I can give her."

"I think I'm going to stop talking to you." Lettuce walked away and head over to Shirogane.

"Shirogane-san?"

"Yes, Lettuce, what is it?"

"Well, since everyone was off doing their own thing, I was kind of wondering if maybe, you know, if you don't mind, like, hang out."

"I would love to."

"Really?"

"I know you've wanted to ask me that for a while now, and to be honest, you always were my favorite."

Lettuce began to blush. "Oh, thank you, Shirogane-san."

"Please, call me Ryou."

"Okay, Ryou."

Together they walked away.

Mint looked around. "Huh, where did Oneesama go? That stupid Lettuce distracted me. Now I'm going to have to find them." She got up from the table and walked away.

Akasawa walked out of the kitchen. "Hey, everyone, I tried out a new cake recipe, and I need you to…where did everyone go? Oh well, more for me."

"Ow, that hurts," Tart said as Pudding pulled him up the stairs.

"Sorry, Tar-Tar," Pudding said. "We just need to find a good place to play our game."

"What sort of game is it?"

"It's a game we need to play alone where no one can disturb us. This broom closet should do the trick."

Pudding opened the closet to much disappointment.

*brood while making out*

"Oh man, someone's already playing it in here."

Tart was shocked. Is this the game she's referring to? It looks gross.

Pudding shut the door. "Come Tar-Tar, I know another place we can use."

She ran down the hall with him until they came to Shirogane's room.

"Ryou-oniisan has a closet, and that's the most common place to play the game."

"But what if he wants to play the game?" Tart asked nervously?

"He usually plays a different game, one he plays by himself. It doesn't need a closet."

Tart felt queasy at thought what that game would be. "Pudding, just what is this game called?" he finally managed to ask.

"I keep asking them," Pudding answered, "But they telling me I'm too young to know."

"And do you know about this game?"

"Once I saw Ichigo-oneesan and Masaya-oniisan playing it after work one day. I kept really quiet and still so they wouldn't know I was there."

That's a laugh, Tart thought.

"So I wondered if anyone else was playing this game, but they all seemed to be playing different games. I tried some of them, but they weren't much fun, so I thought the next time you came over, I thought we should play the game for two."

Tart was horrified. S-She's tried these games? Suddenly, I think I should have stayed home today.

Pudding opened the door to Shirogane's room. For some reason, there were pictures of Lettuce everywhere, but she ignored them and opened the door to the closet. It was a walk-in closet, which made Tart a little more relaxed.

There's a lot of space in here. I could see playing a game in here. Maybe what she means is for us to play a nice, ordinary game.

Then Pudding took her clothes off.

"Pudding! What did you do that for?" He yelled in surprise.

"Ssshhh," Pudding said, her finger to her lips and the placing it on his. "We have to be quiet, or else they'll catch us."

"Just how is this game played, Pudding?"

"There're not really any rules to this game. You just take off your clothes and make it up as you go along." She then began to undo his shit. He was too shocked to resist as his shirt fell to the floor. She looked so beautiful.

He then felt tightness in his shorts. "Pudding what's going on?"

"That just means you're ready to play the game."

"That was a lovely lunch, Ryou," Lettuce said they walked back into the café.

"It absolutely was, my dear," Shirogane said as he held her in his arms.

They then noticed Akasawa sitting with his head down at a table. "Too much cake," he muttered to himself.

"Should we help him?" Lettuce asked her new boyfriend.

"He'll be fine," he reassured her. "He's like this every time he tries a new recipe."

They walked up the stairs together in each other's arms. I'll just take her my room and give her the best day of her life. This is what I've dreamed of, and judging by her smile, she's dreamed of it too. They finally came to his room.

"Lettuce, are you ready for the time of your life?"

"I've been ready for it since the day I met you."

He opened the door, and on his face, there came a look of utter horror. Shit, I forgot I had these pictures up. Now she's going think I'm like a stalker or something.

Lettuce smiled. "I thought I was foolish for having pictures of you up in my room, but since you've done the same, I feel better about it."

"You mean you don't mind?" Shirogane asked.

"Not at all," his new girlfriend answered. "It just shows that we were meant to be together."

"Lettuce, I love you."

"I love you too, Ryou."

"Let us embrace each-other in great passion."

"Yes, I am forever yours."

Shirogane closed the door behind them. "I can't do it in here. It's too embarrassing with all these pictures of you. I have a walk-in closet. There'll be plenty of space in there."

"Okay, honey." The two of them kissed passionately as they entered his closet.

"HEY! WE WERE PLAYING IN HERE FIRST!"

Mint franticly searched everywhere for Zakuro and Pie. She looked in every hallway in every room. This is getting bad. Are they even in the café anymore? The only placed I haven't look in is this broom closet. HOLY SHIT! They're in the broom closet. Do I dare open it? They're probably doing unsightly things in there. I have to open it. Here goes nothing.

Mint opened the door. "ONEESAMA! YOU STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW!"

*brood*

"I don't care. I want you, Oneesama, and I can't stand you being with someone else, even if he is well hung."

*brood*

"Well, I'm in love with you, and it breaks my heart when you do this to me."

*brood*

"Really? You want a threesome? Okay, I guess."

She walked into the closet and closed the door.

"Pudding, what on earth are you doing?" Shirogane said shocked.

"We were just playing a game na no da," Pudding answered. She and Tart were each wearing one of shirogane's coats.

"Well, it's not a game. It has serious consequences. Looks like we're going to have the talk. Put your clothes on, both of you."

"That was great, Ichigo. I had a wonderful time," Masaya said as they entered.

"Too bad Kish had to come and spoil it," Ichigo replied.

"Ah, good, you're back," Shirogane said looking very cross. "I need to have a word with you two."

"You said we could go on a date," Ichigo said annoyed.

"It's not that. It's about Pudding. Apparently, she found you two being intimate."

Ichigo's face turned bright red. "How dare she spy on us like that!"

"Oh dear," Masaya said, "I hope we didn't give her the wrong idea."

"Lettuce and I caught her with Tart in my bedroom. Don't worry, we gave them the talk."

"We're sorry," Masaya said.

"Don't be," Shirogane replied. "It's hard for Pudding considering almost all of her friends are older than her. She hardly interacts with kids her own age."

Kish then appeared. "Has anyone seen Pie? I can't find him anywhere."

"Come, to think of it," Shirogane replied, "I haven't seen Mint or Zakuro either."

Just then Mint walked in. She was wearing Zakuro's uniform, and her hair was a total mess.

"What's everyone looking at?"

Kish: Not bad, though I would have like there to be more of me.

I just wrote three stories featuring you. By the way, where's Pudding and Tart?

Kish: I sent the kiddies away before the more adult parts began.

Good for you. I thought I was going to have to explain it to them.

Kish: You're welcome. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go find Koneko-chan.