Okay, so Haley and Nathan never had Jamie. This starts at episode 5.12. The first two chapters will let you know where Peyton and Nathan's heads are. I don't know If I will continue from there, it depends on the reviews I guess.

Disclaimer: I do not own one tree hill or anything else I may mention.

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We are all sitting in the church wondering what just happened. Lucas is so stunned, he is not even moving. I know he is hurting but he has to know that Lindsay is not making up these connections. He loves Peyton Sawyer, and when you love Peyton Sawyer it is not something that your mind will let you forget or manipulate. Believe me, I know.

I have loved her since Sophomore year in high school, when our story began, if you could call it that. It is not the novel romance that she has with Lucas, but it is our story nonetheless. When we first began dating, I turned on the charm. It was easy when she was around; you longed to see her blush or smile. She is perfect, from her curly head to her gorgeous green eyes. You may ask, what happened.

Junior year things started changing for me, and while I am not trying to make excuses I am merely stating the facts. Lucas began barging in on my territory. I was the top basketball player. I was jealous when he came into the crowd that was mine. He came in and got to play basketball with his heart. I could do the same but I always had that stupid man named Dan Scott in the back of my head telling me I should've tried harder if I want to get scouted. I was jealous because Lucas did not have that. In junior high, Dan's nagging had been there, but it got worse when high school began and college was quickly approaching. My mom had started staying at home more, but this only meant more pain for her. She started drinking more, and taking pills. Can't say I blame her. There was just too much pressure and hate in my life. Peyton was the one good thing I had going for me, but I was stupid and began directing my anger towards her.

When Lucas entered the picture, our relationship was bad and you could tell Lucas liked her. I didn't make it any better. She chose to move on. I didn't know then that he would hurt her more than I ever could.

I soon met Haley. Everyone thinks that she changed me, and made me into this better person. It is easier to let them believe that. It was losing Peyton that made me change. I treated her so bad, and when I realized that I could be that person anymore. Losing her is the regret in my life. Back to Haley, so I changed when I got together with Haley. I liked her a lot, and she made changing easy. She already expected the worst from me, she wasn't in my crowd at school, so it wouldn't be too embarrassing around the guys, and I needed to move on. Peyton needed someone better than me. I was afraid if I remained unattached too long, we would return to our old patterns and I would hurt her again. At with Luke, I thought he would treat her right. I couldn't bear the thought that I could hurt her again. So Haley and I got married. Marriage wasn't easy. I took Haley back after so many things. She left me to go on tour, kissed another man, and a few other things. I think I stayed with Haley so that I couldn't go there with Peyton, not that she would want me back.

Loving Haley wasn't hard, and I do love her. Not in the way I should though. But she loves me and I thought if I just pretended she would at least remain happy. She is not so happy anymore. We are getting divorced. Evidently I am not the man she fell in love with. She is tired of trying to change me. I never told her that she didn't, that it was Peyton. It is probably better that she move on anyways. She hasn't been happy in a while. I'm not perfect, and I guess she can't handle that.

So here I am in the church on my brother's wedding day. His fiancee' just left him at the alter. He said the words "I do" and all I can do is stare at the curly blonde in the second row of the church on the verge of tears. Tears over Lucas. Tears I wish I could make disappear.