After a long day of sparring, Sonic and Link collapsed on the grass, gasping for air. They were tied 10-10 and both were eager to prove themselves as the better fighter but their endurance was beginning to wane.
"You're not half bad." Sonic complimented the young elf. Link smiled, acknowledging his opponent's prowess.
"Aww shucks!" Sonic blushed. "You up for one more? Winner takes all." Link nodded in agreement.
"Alright, 3… 2… 1… go!" Link readied his bow, trying to hone in on the hedgehog's movements. He fired a shot but Sonic easily dodged the arrow. He fired another one but missed again.
"Ha! You're too slow!" Sonic laughed playfully and sped towards his opponent. Link managed to defend himself with his shield just in time.
"Heh, watch this!" The blue speedster began to spin very quickly on the spot, he was charging his special move. "Take this!" Sonic yelled as he unleashed his spin dash on Link. The young adventurer braced himself for the worst. The attack knocked Link's shield out of his hand and sent the two rolling down the hill.
"Ugh…" When Sonic came to, he found himself laying on top of the Hyrule Warrior. He lingered for perhaps what he felt was too long but Link made no move to push him off. Sonic's looked down, Link's tunic was pulled up and revealed an impressive set of abs glistening from sweat. It must take years to build this kind of muscle, the speed demon thought as his hands absent-mindedly caressed Link's six-pack. Sonic's eyes met a pair of deep blue ones, the Hero of Time looked back at him inquisitively, his eyes holding almost a sense of hunger.
Sonic felt a warm fire rising within him, his hands wandered below Link's belt and he felt something hard and stiff. The hot feeling grew more intense as the hedgehog began to stroke the stiffness with his hand. The Hero of Hyrule groaned, he may be a man of few words but the sounds he made said it all. The scorching passion in Sonic's loins could be contained no longer.
"Put your sword inside of me!" Sonic begged. Link stood up and obliged, penetrating the hedgehog with his mighty Master Sword. "UNGH! OH GOD!" Sonic moaned as his rings spilled forth all around. He had his fair share of secretive rendezvous with Shadow and a regretful night with Dr. Eggman, but they could not compare to the god before him. Sonic discovered that elves were much, much larger than hedgehogs.
"I-I'm sorry… there's a reason they call me the fastest thing alive." Sonic admitted embarrassed. Link smiled reassuringly, not bothered by the hedgehog's sudden 'reaction.' "I'd like to try it one more time." Sonic pleaded, not satisfied by the quickness of the first round. Link nodded and thrust the entire length of his sword into Sonic's gaping hole.
"AHHHH!" Sonic cried out, and died. Because he took a stab without any rings.
The End