The first time Karkat told you he was flushed for you was when you told him you were dating Dave.
You'd thought it would have been obvious-everyone else on the meteor could tell that Dave was courting you in his one human quadrant. But no, Karkat stayed holed up and oblivious in his respiteblock, and Kanaya told you it made her uncomfortable to be the one to break it to him.
So you told him yourself, an unpleasant experience to say the least. You had been flushed for him, you really had, but he didn't seem to reciprocate. Even if this was his way of reciprocating, it wasn't what you wanted from him. And you needed to move on.
You feel bad calling his reaction a tantrum, but that's what it was, and somewhere in the middle of his confused jumble of words he had told you, "I'm flushed for you," not that you didn't already sort of know that. It was an awkward, ugly confession of feelings that was never really meant for you, and you had been reminded of all the reasons you two fell apart.
You hadn't been talking much anyway, but after that you barely saw each other.
But when you'd been upset and depressed over your ancestor-over a lot of things, really, but fuck if you could articulate that to anyone-it had been Karkat who found you and comforted you. Of course it was Karkat, and it sure as hell wasn't your matesprit.
You couldn't begin to explain what had gone wrong there. In the beginning everything had been perfect-you'd transitioned seamlessly from inseparable best bros to the stupid bliss of your first red relationship. Then things just stopped working. You talked less and less. You didn't go to him with your messy issues anymore, and eventually you started avoiding encounters with him, because you knew how awkward things would turn out. Can Town went neglected. You suppose that's why you were out in a dreambubble of the forest by your hive, alone, instead of talking things out with your former best bro.
You'd missed Karkat. You hadn't realized how much you missed him. And you were completely unable to tell him anything that you wanted to. It wouldn't be fair to Dave, to just blurt out to Karkat that even after almost a sweep of not talking he still made your heart jump. You definitely couldn't tell him about your relationship with Gamzee, the one relationship in your life that you hadn't ruined for good. So you stood dumb with your eyes on the ground as he beat himself up for the mistakes he'd made in your relationship, and finally left.
Your first instinct, when you got a hold of yourself, was to find him and say at least something, at least let him know that the things he said meant something to you. But that didn't go well, to say the least, and anyway, you realized he wasn't the one you needed to talk to the most.
Dave is sitting on the couch in the common room, listening to music by himself. You don't say anything, just sit down next to him, but you can feel him tense up when you approach.
He takes off his headphones and looks at you. "What's up?" he asks, a hint of defensiveness already in his tone.
You realize that you really should have thought about what you wanted to say when you hear the words "I think we should break up" leave your mouth, in the most blunt and ungraceful manner possible.
"Oh," is his only answer. He sounds disappointed. "I guess I can't really say I didn't see that coming."
"I'm sorry!" you say, and you are.
"Is this about Vantas?" He's not angry, just sad and resigned.
"No!" you say automatically. You remember Karkat saying I just want you to be happy, and mumble, "Yes." Although this is really just something you should have done a long time ago. "No," you say, and after a moment, "No, it's not about Karkat."
"Then what happened?"
"I don't know any more than you do, but it's obvious this isn't working!" You don't want to start crying, but it's out of your control. "I just want to go back to the way things were, when we didn't worry about red feelings or any of that, and we could just tell each other anything." You miss Dave, just as much as you miss Karkat.
He doesn't say anything, but he lets you collapse against his shoulder as it was pretty clear you were about to anyway. "I hate hurting you, Dave, but I don't think I can do this. I don't know if I was ever really red for you." Your speech is muffled against his shirt, but you think he can hear you just fine. "I really like you. Love you, even. But it's a human-platonic kind of love."
You're both quiet for a while as you calm down a bit. It makes you nervous that he hasn't said anything, but you don't know what you're expecting him to say that could make this better.
"Hey Rezi," he begins, still looking over your shoulder, "obviously you don't want to be red with me anymore, but I thought maybe we could try one of your other troll quadrants. I mean like a paler one. Paler pink. The one with the diamond."
"Are you saying you want to be moirails?" you say slowly. "I'd try that! I'd be more than willing to try that, I just, well, you always acted like you had no interest in the quadrants, and I thought if I couldn't even do human romance right there was no way you'd be able to be pale for me and I thought it would just make it more painful to bring it up and you might resent me for it."
"I figure it's worth a shot, if you're willing to make a go of it. Isn't that basically what we were doing before, anyway?"
You pull back so that you're facing him and pull off his sunglasses. "Moirallegiance is a complex relationship with every bit as much nuance as the flushed quadrant. But we will get to that soon enough! The point I am trying to make is that yes, Dave, I'd love to be your moirail." You pap him on the cheek, and kiss him on the nose, and touch him all over his face until he tells you to lay off the troll gestures of affection just a little bit.
"So what's wrong with Vantas, now? You never did tell me what was up with you and him."
"Oh, no," you say. "We are not doing this on the bare floor." You take the cushions and pillows off the couch and grab a blanket that was lying on the floor and shove them in the corner to make a small but adequate pile. You practically drag him over to the pile and make yourself comfortable.
Before you have a chance to talk, though, he says, "You know, every time I manage to almost forget that you're an alien, you go and do some weird shit like this."
"You know you love it, coolkid. We are going to shamelessly have a feelings jam right here and you are going to enjoy every minute of it."
Okay, so maybe that turns out to be an exaggeration. He doesn't enjoy it when you talk about how you've botched your relationship with Karkat and you can't see how to repair things, or when he talks about how much he wishes his bro were still alive and how seeing the miniature version from the new session just made it worse. But it was true in a general sense that he and you enjoyed it more than you've enjoyed anything in a long time. When you're finished you're exhausted and happy, and you cuddle up to him, ironically of course, or at least that's what he says. But the only irony here is that a member of a species that doesn't even do moirallegiance is the best moirail you could ever hope for.
Just a little something I wrote because I was having Dave Terezi feels! I might continue this if there's interest.
Regardless, the second chapter of Land of Sun and Sweat will be up quite soon!