Disclaimer: I don't own Frasier or it's characters. I just borrowed them briefly to tide me over until the start of the new series.
Rating: G
Summary: It's the night before her wedding, but what is going through Daphne's mind as she tries to get to sleep?
Author's note: I am DEEPLY sorry for the title. I just couldn't resist!
In Bed With My Donny.
By N
[rthernStarDaphne's hand hovered over her toothbrush. She'd already cleaned her teeth twice; scrubbing so long and so hard her gums were starting to get sore. There was no reason to brush them again. No reason other than to stay in the bathroom and avoid Donny.
Admitting that to herself made the ghost feel of Niles' lips on hers, soft and shy. She smiled at the memory and it vanished as suddenly as it came under the crushing weight to guilt that followed.
No, I mustn't think of that ever again.
She was going to marry Donny. And she was going to be happy!
And her teeth really did need to be brushed again.
She picked up the toothpaste and unscrewed the cap.
Niles' voice echoed through her mind…Because I love you! She known that before, of course, but to hear him say those words…
"Honey, are you coming to bed?"
Daphne jumped in surprise and her fingers tightened around the toothpaste tube. A long thin sausage of blue and white paste shot up into the air, some fell to the floor, some stuck to the mirror and the rest oozed nastily over her hand.
"Oh, Donny!"
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." He grabbed a towel and began wiping the paste off her fingers. "You've been in here for hours."
"I'm sorry, I guess I'm just a bit nervous tonight."
"You're supposed to be nervous on your wedding night, not the night before." He frowned at the serious expression on her face; "hey, I was kidding." He touched her shoulders. "I know this is a big step we're taking but everything's gonna be fine, I promise."
"I guess you're right," she replied, her voice full of false cheer. She took the towel from him and began mopping up the paste, "I'll just finish this and then I'll be in."
"Alright." He kissed her lips and she watched him disappear back into their room.
******
She pulled back the covers on her side of the bed and slipped in. Donny turned over slightly to allow her to slide next to him so they were almost cuddling. It was they way they always slept.
Daphne moved over to him, their shoulders barely touching. She lay on her back, looking up into the darkened room.
How would she and Niles' have slept together?
The question shocked her, more by the sudden wealth of pictures it brought with it. Niles was a thin man, so was she.
Well, a thin woman anyway…
There would be plenty of room for them both in a bed this big. But she felt sure they'd snuggle up and he'd hold her, even while they slept. If you'd waited so long to be with someone, the way he had, you wouldn't let them go for even a moment…would you?
An image of Niles and Mel curled up together flashed through her mind. Her fingers tightened on the sheets. Were they lying together like that now? She wondered, guilty at her thoughts of another man. Were they talking? Was Niles telling her it was over?
Were they making love?
Donny began tickling the back of her neck and she turned into his arms. He smiled at her in the darkness, staring into her eyes with nothing but love.
What would it be like to lie like this with Niles?
Her heart ached with shame now. What sort of a person thinks these things on the eve of their wedding? What sort of person would hurt this wonderful man for her own happiness?
She couldn't be that person. Not now, and not when Niles had asked her to be with him earlier that night.
Donny lent over and kissed her. She was glad of the darkness; he wouldn't see the tears that welled up in her eyes at his touch.
Tears of guilt.
Tears of shame.
Tears of sorrow that he wasn't Niles…
He pulled back, sensing the lack of enthusiasm in her kiss. She slid forward and buried her tear stained face into her shoulder so he wouldn't see she was crying.
If he saw, he was ask her why…
And right now she wasn't sure she was strong enough not to tell him the truth.
"I'm sorry…" she whispered, "I'm just…really tired…"
"Yeah, I know." He rubbed her back soothingly, "and we have the rest of our lives…"
Daphne clutched him tighter, swallowing back the sobs that threatened to overtake her. "I do love you, you know."
Who are you trying to convince?
Her mind screamed at her, him or you?"I know," he smiled and settled his arms around her. "Shh, we gotta big day tomorrow, we don't wanna oversleep."
Daphne lay her head against his shoulder. Tomorrow…
"Goodnight, honey." Donny whispered.
Daphne smiled slightly and wished him the same. She closed her eyes and the image of Niles looking at her with his intelligent eyes filled with such love and concern for her floated in front of her. I love you, he said.
And she loved him, but sometimes that's just not enough…
Niles smiled sadly and repeated what he'd said to her on the balcony not more than a couple of hours ago…You don't want to live the rest of your life thinking about a chance you didn't take…
The words were the last thing she heard before sleep carried her away…
~~END~~
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[RTHERN STAR" FENNThink I should do one about what Niles is thinking? Comments welcome. Thanks for reading.