Hey-hey, I'm here with another Zutara story. I started this last year and was originally going to make it a cracky one-shot and set it in S1, but I woke up one day going, "OMG, IT SHOULD BE S3!" And then everything changed (when the Fire Nation attacked).

(You all know you thought it.)

Ahem, in any case, here is the multi-chapter S3 version. Not really any warnings worth mentioning, except there will be some Maiko (for obvious reasons, as you'll see). Hope you enjoy!

A Teeny Problem

Katara shifts with a sleepy sound and rolls onto her stomach. Silk brushes against her bare skin. Wait. Silk on bare skin? Her eyes snap open to a sea of red. No rock, no cave. She can't even hear Sokka's snores.

Panic seizes her chest. She sits up in a rush, only to freeze as she realises she is completely naked. Not a stitch of cloth remains. Even her hair is loose. Her heart thuds against her ribs and it takes all of her effort not to scream. She is naked in an unfamiliar place with none of her friends around her. This is bad. This is really, really bad.

There is a soft sound from her left. She swings around and her eyes bug wide open. A very large thing is sprawled on the sea of red silk. It is also moving. At first all she sees is a blur of colour: pale skin tones intermingling with red and gold. Then the thing sits up fully and she stumbles back a few steps. She is looking at a boy. A really, really huge boy. He towers over her like a giant even though he is sitting. Black hair falls in his face and he brushes the strands away as he raises his hand to rub his eyes. That is when she notices the scar marring the left side of his face.

"Zuko!" she growls.

His gaze zones in on her, albeit sleepily. Then his jaw drops and he blinks a few times.

She balls her hands into fists. "You—"

But whatever she is going to say is lost in a cry of rage. It doesn't matter that she is naked and probably smaller than his hand; the sheer craziness of the situation tells her that this has to be a dream. So she doesn't bother to cover herself. Instead, she charges and begins attacking every inch that she can reach of him. Which really means she is stuck kicking and punching one of his legs. If only she had her water to bend …

Zuko's brow creases. "Okay, this is really weird," he mutters.

She makes a frustrated sound and tries to kick him with all her might. He flicks her away with a single finger. She yelps and falls on her backside, legs flailing. Her face splotches with colour.

"I hate you!" she screams. "You evil, horrible—"

"Too weird," he says decisively. His frown deepens and he glances away while scratching the back of his head, ruffling his already messy hair.

"Hey!" She kicks him again. "Don't you ignore me!"

Ugh, the jerk isn't even listening to her. He is still frowning at the wall and mumbling under his breath about strange dreams and how he can't understand why she is tiny, let alone naked. He throws a sidelong glance at her, which she meets with a glare and folded arms. Pink dusts his unscarred cheek.

"Can't you put some clothes on or something?" he asks.

"You're asking me that? You think I wanted to dream myself naked in front of you? I wish I was bigger and clothed and had my water flask so I could make you pay for what you did!" Her hands tremble with building anger. "I can't believe I almost—"

"But this is my dream."

Katara blinks. "What? This is my dream!"

They both stare at each other. He leans forward so that his huge face is looming far too close. She stumbles back a step, feet planting into a bending stance. The prince doesn't attack her; he just frowns before, very carefully, he touches her head with his fingertip.

She swats at him. "Don't touch me!"

His good eye goes as wide as it can go and he moves back, averting his gaze. Some of the colour drains from his face. "Hey," he says, voice thick with an emotion she can't place. "Do you know where you are?"

She casts a swift glance at her surroundings. Now she can see that she is in a room. A really huge room. The décor is all red, gold and ornate wood. It looks like the kind of thing she saw in the Earth King's palace, except more muted. Still, every bit of fabric and carving screams of wealth.

"I don't know," she says with a shrug. "I don't care either. Once I wake up, I'll—"

Zuko curses. Multiple times.

"What?" she demands.

"This is my room." He is still avoiding looking at her. "Do you understand what I'm saying? This is my bedroom in the Fire Nation palace." He clenches his hands into fists. "If this is your dream, how could you have imagined it in exact detail?"

"Well, I—"

"And if this is my dream, why wouldn't you know that you were in my bedroom?"

"That's just—"

He groans and places his hands over his face. "This can't be happening."

Her heart thuds against her ribs. She wants to laugh and tell him he is crazy for thinking that this is real, but the awful twisting in her stomach whispers that what he says makes a sickening kind of sense. That also means she is now very tiny and very, very naked.

Cheeks burning, she snatches at the silk sheet and holds it up against her body. "No way!" she cries. "There's no way this is real! Just look at me! How can—"

"Then you tell me what's going on!" His face emerges from his hands, except where she is pink, he is pale. Only the wounded discolouring of his scar stands out. "None of this makes sense! Why are you like this? Why are you here?" His eyes meet hers, flickering with too many emotions to unravel. "Why with me?"

She can only open and close her mouth. She has no answers. Neither of them do.

Zuko groans again and flops against the bed so he is lying on his back. She stumbles a little from the motion. Ugh, being this tiny sucks.

"Watch it!" she snaps.

He drapes his arm over his eyes. Jerk has gone back to ignoring her and muttering under his breath.

Katara gathers more of the sheet around her and stomps up to him. "Hey!" She kicks him again. "Hey!"

He doesn't even twitch. That's when she realises just how vulnerable she is. She can't fight him like this. She can't fight anyone. Worse, if he's to be believed, she's now stuck in the Fire Nation palace, the very heart of her enemies.

She is in every sense of the word screwed.

I really do have a penchant for writing stories about characters who undergo some kind of body transformation. Oh well, it's fun.

Anyway, if you've read I Don't Speak Meow Language, you'll notice I'm using a similar style. Chapters will be short and have a more slice of life feel. It's the only way to stop this from turning into another Zuko's Tiny Dilemma. (I've learnt my lesson.)

Until next time!