Disclaimer: Nope, don't own a thing

The first sensation the Doctor felt when he woke up was pain. Blinding pain. Blinding, searing pain. And most of it was centered right behind his eyeballs. The rest of him only felt moderately stomped on.

Bits of memories flashed through his traumatized head, and he would have groaned if he could have; his attempt sounded more like a whimper.

In one of the store rooms in the TARDIS, he'd discovered a case of the Gallifreyan equivalent of champagne. After another narrow escape, the Doctor thought that Rose's suggested celebration would be the perfect venue to enjoy his find.

In a way, he'd been right. The spicy but light bouquet had been just as he'd remembered it, and the flavor nearly brought tears to his eyes.

He'd forgotten about its potency.

Human alcohols had very little effect on him; something about the way his metabolism reacted to their composition. He'd always enjoyed winning drinking games on Earth and coming out unscathed the next day.

Gallifreyan alcohols were different. The first glass had gone straight to his head. The second glass had things going slightly fuzzy at the edges, and he remembered Rose smiling indulgently. After the third glass…he couldn't remember. He could have been dancing around the TARDIS naked, singing 'I Will Survive' for all he knew. It wouldn't be the first time in 900 years.

But in front of Rose…what if he'd said something inappropriate? What if he'd used some of that liquid courage and finally told her how he felt about her? Bugger.

He did whimper this time, and was slightly surprised when his bed (at least, he presumed it was his) dipped as someone sat.

"Hey," a voice said softly, as though aware of the fragility of his condition.

He whimpered again. That one might have passed for a groan.

"Poor thing," Rose said, keeping her voice low. "You've got a doozy of a hangover, don't you?" She continued without waiting for a reply. "Don't worry, I've got plenty of experience with 'em; I'll have you set to rights in no time." Humor tinged her voice. "Now don't jump," she instructed. "I'm gonna put a cold cloth over your eyes, then I'll be right back."

The cloth felt heavenly, and he just stayed mercifully still and blessed his companion. Multiple times. He was still doing so in as many languages as his poor suffering mind would allow when she returned.

"I've got something for you to drink. I know that the mere thought of eating or drinking anything right now is repulsive, but you'll feel better once you're got it down. There's no aspirin in it, but are you allergic to any other painkillers?"

"Just the aspirin," he replied, "or things that have salicylic acid in them."

"Then you're good," Rose said with a nod. "Drink this. It's banana flavored, and I even got you a straw."

"Acting like my mum now, are you," he grumbled, though he did begin to drink the milkshake.

"Absolutely not," she replied with a snort. "If your mum was anything like mine, she'd have left you to suffer! Good learning experience and all that."

The Doctor smiled slightly. "You're probably right."

"Course I am," Rose stated. "No, a friend of mine called this the West Indian way of dealing with men. Tell 'em what to do, and it's on them for not listening. Besides, you take care of me all the time. I like being able to return the favor."

While she'd been talking, the Doctor had finished the last of the drink. He set the empty glass aside. "Rose Tyler, have I ever told you how fantastic you are?" he exclaimed. "I actually feel almost normal."

She laughed. "Good. Just remember how awful you felt this morning before you go drinking like you did last night."

"Yes ma'am!"

Rose stood and picked up the glass, making her way to the door so he could get changed and whatnot. She paused in his doorway. "Doctor?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm quite fond of the Garfield boxers, but you might want to try altering your accent a bit if you really want to give a good performance of 'Sweet Home Alabama'," Rose suggested. "Just a thought."

She left, and when the bed refused to swallow him and save him from his mortification, the Doctor sighed and decided he'd have to face the day. She'd never let him live this down.

A/N: For those of you wondering, a banana smoothie with feverfew, B vitamins, ginger, and honey is an AMAZING hangover remedy. I'd recommend either making one before you start drinking, or having someone else around, however. Hangover + Blender = Pain. Trust me. Hope everyone enjoyed the silliness!