No one likes or really cares about Pansy Parkinson, so I decided to make this oneshot/drabble thing about her. It's my first HP fic and my first drabble, but I think it came out sort of okay. I really like Pansy after writing it. :)
Disclaimer: If I were JKR, I'd buy a house in Fiji and vacation there every summer. No Fiji for me, though, because I'm not her. D8
Love Conquers All
Character(s): Pansy Parkinson
Summary: Pansy spent her whole life looking for love, but her mistake was that she was never able to look past him.
Maybe it's hard to believe, but Pansy was always a sweet girl. At the very least, she always tried to be. She tried to be good for many reasons.
One, her parents. Pansy's parents were kind, and to disappoint them would be unbearable. So Pansy tried to be good for her parents, not willing to face their disapproval.
Two, her sister. Pansy and her sister were close. Lacey Parkinson looked up to her sister. Though Pansy was not beautiful or smart or funny or anything special, really, Lacey admired her. And Pansy did not want to let her down. So she tried to be good for her sister, even though it was often hard.
Three, Draco Malfoy. Though Pansy could only admit it to herself, she was in love with Draco. That truth stayed solid in her mind, but she could never think of any reasons why, only moments when she'd been so in love with him that she'd thought she would die if they couldn't be together. Moments when he was all that mattered.
***
It is fourth year, and Pansy is sitting in her bedroom in front of Tracey's vanity mirror. It is the only mirror in the girls' bedroom, and she nearly drew blood from another girl to use it. All of the Slytherin girls, fourth year and up, are refraining from screaming in anticipation for the Yule Ball, and the younger years pretty enough to be invited are now strutting through the Common Room with their heads held high.
Pansy is not pretty. As she examines herself in the mirror, that belief is reinforced. Even after smothering herself with makeup and spending hours trying to learn a hair-curling spell, Pansy still sees a pug-faced girl with dull brown eyes and a sneer. Even after days and days of pawning through racks looking for the perfect dress and then spending all of her savings getting it tailored, Pansy still sees a skinny, pointy-featured girl with chicken legs.
But she still hopes with all her heart that the makeup and the spell and the dress and the jewelry will make Draco see something else, not her sneer or her chicken legs, but the Pansy Parkinson that was so desperate to be with him.
Pansy stands up and examines herself from all angles. Everything is perfect, or as perfect as it could be, except for one thing. On her wrist is a blue and green beaded bracelet that spells out her name in crooked letters. It clashes horribly with her magenta dress.
She moves to pull it off, but then she remembers her promise. This is the friendship bracelet Lacey made her when she was seven and Pansy was twelve. Lacey has an identical one herself. And she remembers their promise never to take it off.
But it is a stupid, childish promise that pales in comparison to the utmost importance of this night. Pansy has heard stories about the Yule Ball: first dances, first kisses, and moments where couples fall completely in love. This is how her aunt and uncle ended up married. All these things she hopes for with Draco, and she won't let this silly promise stand in her way. Pansy pulls the bracelet off and tosses it aside. This is the last time she sees it.
***
It is sixth year, and Pansy stands at Platform nine and three-quarters clutching her bags. This time, though, she is not alone. Lacey stands beside her, quivering with nervousness.
The scarlet train pulls into the station, and it is met with a customary round of applause and whistles. Lacey's eyes widen at the sight of it, and she presses closer to Pansy.
Pansy remembers her first year anxieties. She remembers walking down the aisle of the Hogwarts Express, looking for another lost-looking girl to sit with. She remembers her stomach churning with apprehension as she stands to the side in the Great Hall, waiting to be sorted. She remembers wishing she had someone there to comfort her and show her the way. But mostly, she remembers her first sight of Draco Malfoy.
And then she spots him, picking out his white-blonde hair from among the crowd. He has grown over the summer; he's now a good head taller than her. He beckons with his hand for her to join him, and she blindly pushes her way through the crowd.
Lacey calls to her, looking frightened as she tries to avoid getting lost in the mass of bodies. Pansy remembers her promise then: she remembers telling Lacey that she will stay with her, sit with her on the train, and tell her everything she needed to know. She remembers promising to protect her.
Pansy hesitates, looking back for a minute. She will always remember her sister's face at that moment, confused and alone and scared.
But she doesn't turn back. She continues through the crowd, pushing past people until she is at Draco's side. She smiles at him. But she doesn't remember this day as the day she betrayed her sister; she remembers it as the day where Draco Malfoy slept with his head in her lap.
***
It is seventh year now, and everything is in chaos at Hogwarts. Everything is a swarm of Death Eaters and students and teachers and giants and elves and spells shooting everywhere.
Pansy stands on one end of the Great Hall, watching the battle through tear-filled eyes. She watches for Draco, hoping, praying that she will see his silver-blonde head emerge from the pandemonium. She barely hears her sister come up behind her.
"Pansy?" she whispers, tugging on the back of her robe. She turns and sees Lacey's tearstained, sooty face and charred robes. She looks more scared and confused than she did that day at the train station. "Pansy, we have to go? Where do we go?"
Pansy looks back at her sister. She looks seconds away from breaking down and sobbing. She is torn as she scans the crowd for Draco's face. Then she spots two other students, fifth years maybe, hurrying down the hall.
"Go with them," she said, nudging her sister towards the girls. She tries to cling onto Pansy's robes, but she pries her off. "Go!"
As Lacey disappears down the hallway, Pansy doesn't know that this is the last time she will look to her for help. She doesn't know that this is the last time her sister will believe in her. She draws her wand.
***
School has ended, and Pansy is now thirty. She has a job, not a great one, at the Ministry of Magic. She lives in Knockturn Alley.
But she is not at home today. She is standing on the beautiful green lawn of Malfoy Manor. She has not been her in years, but she is here now. She is here now because it is Draco's birthday. Although she hasn't seen him since he left his job at the Ministry three years ago, she has not forgotten him.
And, as Pansy has always done every October 7th since she was eleven, she has brought him a birthday present. The last three years she has sent them by owl, too afraid to speak with him, but she has gotten no response. Now she is trembling as she makes her way to the steps of the enormous house.
She has decked herself out in lavender robes and silver jewelry. Since fourth year she has perfected the hair-curling spell and now uses it often. Beneath her right arm, she holds her green-wrapped present. Her hand shakes as she reaches up and rings the doorbell.
It is several seconds before the door swings open. Draco stands before her, wearing black robes and looking ten times more handsome than Pansy remembered. She almost bursts into tears at seeing him again, but manages to hold herself together.
He is surprised to see her, but not unhappy. He invites her in and accepts her present, but does not open it. He leads her into the living room and they sit down on a green velvet couch. It's odd; Pansy always remembers this couch being white.
Draco talks, but his answers to her questions seem…evasive. Just as the topic of relationships emerges, a door opens and a dark-haired woman enters. In her arms is a small, blanket-wrapped bundle. She sits down beside Draco.
At first, Pansy is confused. She is confused until she sees the bright silver band on Draco's left hand.
***
Pansy stumbles blindly out of Malfoy Manor, into the darkness of the night. The sun has set and the sky is completely black. Her head is consumed with confusion and her heart is consumed with pain.
For so many years, Draco Malfoy was her obsession. Her dream. Her only goal in life. Her only desire. It had consumed her. And now, now that it was gone, Pansy has nothing.
She needs a cure for this pain. She needs someone to talk to. Friends? She has none. Draco was the only friend she'd ever needed. Parents? They wouldn't understand.
Sister?
Pansy hasn't seen her sister since right after Lacey graduated from Hogwarts. She remembers, vaguely, receiving owls with letters from her sister, most of which she was too preoccupied to respond to. But one that had arrived maybe several weeks ago, that she had tucked into the pocket of these very robes…
She searches her pockets before finding the folded piece of parchment. She flips over the envelope and reads the return address. Without hesitation, she spins around and disappears with a crack.
***
Pansy Apparates onto the steps of her sister's house. The lights are on, and she breathes a sigh of relief. She reaches up and rings the doorbell. There is no response. She rings it again. No response.
She looks up into the window and sees her sister. She is shocked at how much she has grown. She looks healthy, put-together. Beautiful. A pang of jealousy strikes Pansy. She meets her sister's gaze.
Lacey stares at her for a long time. And then she pulls the curtains shut.
Confused and hurt, Pansy stumbles down the steps. Tears sting at her eyes. Why didn't her sister open the door? Why had she refused her when she needed her? A glut of memories appears to Pansy, an answer to her questions.
She left her sister behind for Draco during her first year when she needed her.
She threw out her friendship bracelet, abandoning the promise they'd made to each other.
She wasn't there for her sister's graduation; she was visiting Malfoy Manor.
She wasn't there for her sister's wedding; she was busy persuading her boss to give Draco a job.
She'd ignored her letters, her calls, and her invitations to visit. She'd shut her out of her life.
Now she has nothing left.
She continues down the block. The night is dark and perhaps dangerous, but she doesn't feel like Apparating back home.
Pansy will not remember this day as the day she lost Draco; she will remember this day as the day that she lost her sister.
"Lacey," she whispers into the night, hoping for a whisper of her own name in return. "Lacey. Lacey. Lacey."
(But nothing but the whispering wind breaks the silence.)
It didn't turn out the way I expected, but I like it. I think the idea of Pansy's love of Draco overshadowing everything else in her life is interesting. I mean, clearly he didn't love her back, but in the books she seemed pretty enamored by him. I was going to put in the Buckbeak scene from the Chamber of Secrets, but I couldn't really find a way to make it work. Oh well.
Review, please—I'd appreciate some concrit.