Disclaimer: I own nothing, sadly.
A/N: Yet another Cupcake short. is a little anemic in the Cupcake department, so I want to do my part to right that. I don't really have time to write more than oneshot-y stuff though. On a different note, if everyone psyched for Fearless Fourteen? I read the jacket cover, and it looks like this one will be more Cupcake-ish! Which will be nice after reading Twelve Sharp.
Summary: After Stephanie storms out, Joe gets drunk and confides about his relationship drama with Ranger.
"What's the deal with Terry Gilman?"
I was sitting in the corner booth, decidedly facing away from Pino's masses, and drinking on my empty stomach. He approached me, probably appearing out of the shadows like the sexy hunk of mysteriousness everyone seemed to think he was. Ranger. The last person I wanted to see on most days, but especially today. Especially after that afternoon's fight.
It was bullshit, really. Terry's family was in a bind, and she needed to hide out for a few days. My house was offered (not even by me). I even tried to protest, since Stephanie had broken her lease and moved in less than a week ago. She was understanding for the first day, surprisingly so. It was supposed to be the start of a new era in our relationship. No more fights; we would work things out like adults. We would make this relationship work. How could we not? We loved each other so much.
Then I came home from work to find Steph crying and packing a duffle bag. She refused to speak, except to say that she would pick up Rex later, and then she just drove away. I stayed for a few minutes, trying to get Terry to tell me what happened, but she just stood there, all smug. And I knew this was another one of her dumb mind games, and I couldn't believe I had been stupid enough to leave them alone together. I should have known that Terry hadn't grown up at all. That she hadn't changed at all since high school. Finally I grabbed my keys and tried to find Steph, but she wasn't at her parent's or her sister's, or Mary Lou's. She wasn't at the bond office, and Lula hadn't heard from her. There was only one place she could be, and person she could be with. I was seething inside. We got into one little fight, whose reason I didn't even know yet, and she was already back to him.
Him: Ranger, who was glaring down at me, wondering what the deal was with Terry Gilman. I followed the trunk of his arm with my eyes, and breathed out a sigh when I saw that his hand was empty, and not wrapped around the soft palm and long fingers that I know so intimately. But he must had seen her, or at least talked to her since it happed.
"I have no idea," I could hear myself slurring the words, but I couldn't help it. All of my fine motor skills seemed lost in my foggy mind. If I were sober, I wouldn't talk to Ranger at all, but I was drunk and I wanted to talk. At least Ranger had slightly more personality than the carved wooden fish that hung on the wall across from me. "Don't know what happened." I tried to take another swig of beer, but Ranger's dark hand shot out of nowhere and set itself heavily onto the rim of the glass.
"No more," he said, taking the seat across from me. "Now talk."
"We dated in high school. It was bad. Unhealthy, I guess I might call it now. We were never exclusive, but we never broke up." It was like a switch inside me had turned. I was telling the story, but I wasn't telling it to Ranger. I didn't know who I was telling it to. "I never thought we would break up, and I never thought we would be monogamous. I just figured that I would knock her up, we'd have a quick wedding and about 50 years of a loveless sham of a marriage before, finally, liver failure released me from the hell." I fell silent. Ranger just kept staring.
"Go on," he nodded.
"When I came back from the Navy she was already married. It was weird. We hadn't spoken at all for four years, but I'd still sort of hung onto the idea. Although it was dismal, it was the future I'd been counting on. We met up a few times anyway, and we had sex, but it was different. It didn't feel good. Not like it was exceptionally great before I left, but now it didn't even feel like sex. It's hard to explain. Sorry."
I didn't know what I was apologizing for, but I guess I also didn't really know what I was saying. The words seemed to be coming from nowhere and everywhere. They were coming from that afternoon's fight, and from the beer that sloshed uncomfortable in my stomach, and Ranger's piercing stare, and the mistakes I made many years ago. I felt my throat closing up, and my eyes burning. I thought that I was tired, because I knew that if I cried in front of Ranger I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
"It's funny. I never thought that Terry would affect me that much. Everything was so casual. Even our break-up; we just stopped calling each other, and it was over. After Terry, I was careful about my relationships. I was careful not to pick a girl who was smart enough to play me the way Terry had, or stupid enough to expect anything from me other that a warm body. But soon even they lost their charm, and I was just alone, and I stayed that way for a while. I know that Stephanie thinks I don't take marriage seriously because of my lame proposals, but I've been serious every time. Even after Terry, I never accepted that I could have anything other than a loveless marriage. I thought that right up until I started seeing Steph."
A warm arm reached around my neck, snapping me out of my rambling. It only took a second for me to recognize the arm.
"Just shut up," she whispered huskily into my ear and kissed my neck. Had she really been there the whole time, listening in on everything? Ranger's smirk said yes. I'd been had.
"Steph," I said. I was having trouble talking without laughing. I was unnaturally happy, no doubt through the effect of alcohol and proximity to my girlfriend. "Steph. I think it's you're turn to tell me what the deal with Terry Gilman is. What the hell happened today?"
"I have a better idea," she said with a wicked smirk, trailing her finger across the V of my exposed skin. "Why don't we go home and have really loud sex. Show her what the deal is with us."
I agreed. It was a better idea.
The endd!