Manda's Note: So uh, have I mentioned that I can't stop writing? ...wasn't sure. Enjoy!
"Sissy push me higher"
She listened to the demands of the little brunette boy who's curls flailed in the wind every time she pushed him forward in the toddler swing. It was unusual for her to have Elijah out. Had she been at her mother's in Lima Heights her mother would have thrown a bitch fit and a half over it. It was a good thing that this was a rare weekend without her. Antonia Cruz had claimed she needed a break when she'd dropped off her eighteen year old daughter and the four year old to her ex husband. Something that Santana hadn't complained about for even a moment. She liked being at her dad's, she could get away with things she couldn't when she was in the other side of the tracks. At her dad's in the house she'd been raised in she could get away with the things she missed most. Things like reading to Elijah and tucking him in at night, At least her father didn't seem to think she was any sort of poison to the child.
The nights she got to spend with him cuddled up to her underneath the transformers blanket as she read and re read the books she'd listened to her own father read to herself night after night as a child were ones that Santana would have chosen over almost any other ones put in front of her.
"Sisssssssy"
His squeal pulled her from her thoughts and she looked down at the little bright hazel eyed boy. His head was thrown back with a big smile on his face. Every wall she had in her life was pulled down at the small child's face. It had always been. Elijah Jaden Cruz was one of the few exceptions to Santana's every rule. Stopping the swing she picked him up and he wrapped his arms around her neck. There was something different about being able to let herself go, to let every wall that she held up so high down. The child never failed to make everything in her life somehow work with something so simple as one of his smiles or his 'I'm up to no good' smirks. His little arms were still around her, holding onto her tightly, chin perched on her shoulder.
"Sissy…can you take me here alls a time?"
If only she could have looked at him and said yes, she wished she could fill his requests but with the way things were that just wasn't possible. Instead for a moment she held him in the tightest hug she could manage before pulling him away from her, hands under his arms. He looked at her questioningly. His little head tilting, and an eyebrow raised. For a four year old he had all of the quick witted smarts of a sixteen year old.
"You can tell me if you don't wanna"
If only he would have understood the truth that she wanted to tell him. If only he could have comprehended any bit of it. But, he wouldn't have been able to and she only would have confused him. So instead she simply kissed his forehead as he folded his arms across his chest, a scowl finding its way to his face with little effort. He was like her when it came to that. Able to pack the attitude the moment something wasn't going the way he wanted it.
"Don't give me that Elijah. You know how your mother gets."
The words were acidic sounding as they left her lips. She'd never speak of that woman as if she were any trophy winning mother. In Santana's eyes she was almost as far from that as she could have gotten. The woman hadn't even been able to meet her half way on anything. It'd turned even worse the moment she'd stopped going to church at the age of fourteen. A lot of things had gotten worse at the age of fourteen. They were issues she decided not to linger on day after day. It didn't do her any good to think about when she and her mother's relationship had gone south. It wasn't like it was ever going to be fixed so what was the use? Part of her would always wonder why she didn't choose to live with her father when the option had been put in front of her. Then she looked at Elijah and she knew exactly why. The last thing she would have done was leave them in the possession of the one person she knew could have easily ruined everything about Elijah that made her smile.
"Does ….you promise you love me to the moon then?"
The little face in front of her was dead serious as he uncrossed his arms and raised one of his tiny pointer fingers up to the sky. A smile crossed her face then as she nodded her head and started to tickle him under his arms earning his little shrieks of happiness as she did so. the moment that she stopped tickling him the now exausted from laughing little boy crashed back into her arms, his head melting against her shoulder as she held onto him tightly. She wrapped her arms around him again and nodded her head as she made her way over to a wooden bench to sit down on for the time being.
"I love you all the way to the moon and back."
Guess How Much I Love You, that had always been one of the very first books taken off of the shelf and handed to her when she had the luxury of spending any sort of time with him. Her favorite book had been one of the few things she'd been allowed by her mother to slip into his nursery. His eyes sparkled as he pulled back from her again before pressing a fast kiss to her cheek, looking once again around at all of the other play equipment in the playground. She knew right then that it would only be a few more moments before he wanted to be put down so that he could go climb up the slide or any other thing kids weren't supposed to do yet did anyway. He knew with her he could get away with anything he desired to and she
wouldn't once raise her voice or tell him not to do something.
There was one other thing she loved about being at her father's house other than location. It wasn't as if she hated Lima Heights she just didn't so much appreciate the noises outside of her windows at all times of night. If it scared her there was no way that Elijah could have liked it even better. The little boy she'd watched freak out over the terror of a thunderstorm couldn't have had any easier a time with the sounds of shouting and shots being fired on a nightly basis. It wasn't just that it was the fact that this house, her father's house, was the place she'd grown up in for the first fourteen years of her life. Her height chart was inscribed on the wall of her childhood doorway, photos of her childhood hung going down the stairs. Everything about being in this house was comforting where the small apartment in Lima Heights just wasn't. This place had always and would always be her true home. Had it not been for Elijah she wouldn't have still been in her mother's grasp. But she couldn't very well leave the child with just Antonia alone. She'd rather of kidnapped him than done that.
Backing away from the preschooler's doorway she closed it gently and stood for a moment staring at his name written in block letters on the outside of it. She'd read to him, 'Guess How Much I Love You' had once again been the choice of the night when she'd tucked him in and kissed his forehead. A lazy smile pressed to his lips as his heavy eyelids closed and passed him into a comfortable sleep. He always looked so calm when he slept. Something that she didn't get to watch other than when she was at her dad's, something that she resented. But, it wasn't anything to linger on. She had other things she was supposed to be doing.
Walking into the bathroom off of her room she ran her hand along the garnet counter top. Plastic Surgeon for a father was nice when you actually got to enjoy the perks of it. It looked like something that belonged in the Palace Hotel rather than an ordinary house in Lima Ohio. But when she was twelve he'd taken her along with an interior designer to pick out whatever she wanted. Daddy's little girl was something that she'd always been. Maybe that was why when she'd asked for implants he'd snapped his fingers and her mother had scoffed. She liked doing things that spited the woman.
Her hand on the sliver knobs of the Jacuzzi tub she set on the jets and the water to a comfortable hot before stepping down off the marble steps. Stripping out of her shorts, tank, and lace she left them in a heap on the floor before lighting the lavender candles and waiting for the bath water to reach the right level. The scent already relaxing her and soothing every situation around her. A simple long bath and then an early night. Tomorrow she'd spend the day reminding everyone what it was actually like when Santana Lopez was actually accessible and in the normal part of town.
Water filled up quickly and Tana slipped under the curtain of bubbles. It was nice being at her dad's and not having to keep up the façade of being into Brittany just to throw her mother off from her extracurricular activities. The lights were dim, the silence was comforting. At least it had been comforting till the door creaked open.
"You started without me?"
She held back a smile at his voice and used her energy to turn it into a smirk instead. She should have known he'd rush over when the neighbors noticed the lights in her bedroom and put him in alert. Marcy must have confirmed for him that it was her in the house. Maybe she should have given the cook a warning before she'd gone to take a bath. That probably wouldn't have done her any good. Puck had known the ways to break in, they'd done it both apart and together since they were kids.
"Fuck you Puckerman"
The drawl sounded tired and lazy as she refused to look at him. She didn't have to look at him to know exactly what he was already doing. She knew the sound of his belt coming undone and his shirt being pulled over his head. This was without a doubt the other perk to being back where she belonged.
"I'd much rather if you'd do that."
Tapping her shoulder gently till she slipped forward, he slipped in behind her and slipped his arms around her bare sides, his lips attaching themselves to the side of her neck and making every tense muscle there suddenly feel like j-ello. Not that that was a new feeling. Puck always had that effect on her, making her relax without hardly trying. Even when she was mad at him. It was just the way they worked and she'd learned to accept those facts through the years that passed. His hands ran up and down her sides as she turned her head to meet his heated kisses she was tempting to clear the calm that had been her bubble bath time just to surrender to the way he made her feel. She was eighteen and an adult. This behavior was perfectly acceptable.
His hand snuck lower, rubbing circles on her inner thigh till her head was back and her eyes were shut. His hand crept up further, his fingers brushing against sensitive areas and wiping most thoughts from her head. The perks of her father working late at its best. His fingers worked, his lips created red spots she'd have to cover with makeup before going home. She didn't care. That was till the little knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts. Even halfway gone she heard the small little bangs.
"Sissy …I'm scared"
At that moment she pushed Puck's hand away, it no longer having the effect that it'd had before. How could she have been so dumb? Getting carried away when Elijah was in the house. Getting carried away with him of all people. When was she going to grow up and stop this immaturity? She couldn't even turn around to glance at him again. She should have known him better than to think he was going to give her anything but a hard time about actually leaving.
"Puck you need to go"
As she pulled up her jeans and pulled her shirt on over her head she hadn't noticed him, already in his boxers and tee-shirt pulling open the door. Great.