I don't own any of these characters btw.
Ok this is my first attempt at a fanfic. Keep in mind that this is set in a world where Ziva never left and the shambles that was season 11 never happened. It will be multi-chapter so apologies for not finishing the whole thing before publishing but it will be concluded very soon. Enjoy it and, of course, reviews are welcome. I need to know whether to stick with this stuff or give up
Nothing quite sets the mood like the abrupt sound of gunfire. It's one of only a few loud and explosive sounds that only ever signal immediate danger of even death for those unfortunate enough to be in the vicinity of their source. The horrifying sound of that first peace-shattering bullet embarking on its potentially fatal, and often short, journey to the whatever destination the shooter has chosen is something the average Washington D.C resident would not be used to hearing. It tends to invoke a similar reaction from these (mostly) innocent souls. Panic. Instinctive, widespread and often uncontrollable panic.
One minute an ordinary person with an ordinary job will once again find themselves carrying out their usual everyday routines: - walking back to work after spending their lunch break with an old friend, squeezing in their daily jog somewhere between all the other activities in their busy schedule or maybe even putting their feet up on a Friday night in the apparent safety of their own home, and the next minute all hell breaks loose. Assuming these ordinary people aren't the ones who actually get hit by the flying lead, common courses of action tend to range from:- running for help, calling 911 for help or, in some cases, falling in a crumpled heap on the ground in hysterics and simply praying for help.
But highly trained federal agents are anything but ordinary. Especially any federal agents who just so happened to be originally trained by Mossad to spy, kill and generally not panic when it came to any form of combat, unexpected or planned. Few, if any, people could be described in such a way and, in that respect, NCIS special agent Ziva David was one of a kind. Her everyday 'routines' were far from ordinary. They usually consisted of investigating puzzling, and often sickening, murders, finding a missing marine, preventing potential terrorist attacks and generally following her boss' often 24 hour-filling orders. This line of work often involves armed suspects who have a tendency to be hostile towards said boss and any of his major case response team.
This meant that gunfire was something Ziva David had become almost embarrassingly accustomed to over the years. This familiarity, combined with her training and combat experience, meant that panicking was something she almost never did in a gunfight. When others might be forgiven for going into a shocked paralysis or letting fear take over their actions, Ziva simply took a few moments to analyze the situation and act quickly to defuse it. It almost goes without saying that her 'ninja senses', as her partner would call them, would have had her drawing her sig immediately after, or sometimes even before, the first gunshot is even heard so therefore 'defusing' the situation usually involved her kicking some serious bad guy ass.
She could always take care of herself. And as a rule she did not allow herself to panic, not matter what danger she found herself in. There was an exception to every rule she lived by, however.
In the case of this particular rule, the exception tended to take the shape of a certain senior field agent. She could always keep her cool if it was only her life on the line but whenever Anthony DiNozzo, her partner of over 8 years, found himself in harm's way when she was supposed to be watching his back, Ziva couldn't control her uncharacteristically frantic actions that sometimes led to her being accused of being overprotective and nearly always led to some bruised faces and broken bones.
She could never really explain the reason behind her adrenaline fueled actions when a suspect points a gun at Tony, or even if they decide to get in a fist fight with him. She has always taken any measure necessary to keep him safe and put his welfare before her own. It had reached the point where it was instinctive. She knows he's in the same boat when it comes to watching out for her. In fact, the closeness and honesty they shared in this 'post elevator' chapter of their partnership meant he was constantly watching her back in all aspects of life. He managed to keep her intact physically and emotionally and had slowly become a better friend than she could ever have hoped for. She was always thankful for him, even if she could never find the words to express her gratitude or be able to understand why she deserved him in her life. They had always steered clear of openly showing affection for one another. She figured the best way for her to thank him for always being there for her was to ensure his safety at all times, whatever the cost might be. That was one of many reasons why she often became her own version of the Incredible Hulk whenever someone so much as laid a finger on her partner.
On one unforgettable day someone did much worse than that.
It started off like any other day did during an ongoing investigation. This particular case involved a young marine who'd been stabbed to death outside a bar in downtown DC. This meant Gibbs was as motivated as ever to get to the bottom of this case and find out why a fellow grunt had reached this untimely and tragic demise. After interviewing the bartender upon arriving at the scene the previous day, the team discovered that the victim was not alone in the bar. A few hours later, and with the help of one particular caffeine addicted Gothic forensic scientist, McGee was able to use his unworldly computer skills to use surveillance footage and ID the marine's companion. This meant that early the next morning the DiNozzo-David dynamic duo were sent to a rather unfriendly feeling neighborhood in Anacostia to hopefully find what was their only suspect.
''This is the place. Barkley lives in the one right at the end of the street'' Ziva informed her partner even though he probably already knew.
Tony looked around with his nose turned up after bringing the charger to a stop at the end of said street. ''Nice place'' he replied sarcastically.
Ziva hummed in acknowledgement, ''It certainly is not somewhere I would choose to live If I could help it.''
''Nope.'' He turned to her, ''But it is the sort of place you might find a crazy murderer.''
She raised an eyebrow at him, amusement shining in her eyes. ''You are so sure he did it?''
''Aren't you?'' He quizzed quickly with a hint of confusion etching itself onto his face.
She sighed, looking out the windshield in a way that suggested to Tony that she at least hoped the case was as simple as he was suggesting. ''That would be too easy. Usually we lose out on a few more days of sleep before closing a case. Besides isn't there rule number…something or other.'' She says waving her hand dismissively as she unbuckles her seatbelt before elaborating, ''Never assume.''
''Ok. If you're gonna recite the holy Gibbs rules to me you've gotta at least remember the numbers.'' He shot back whilst wearing his infectious DiNozzo grin. ''You've had long enough to remember them by now, sweetcheeks.'' With that she shot a glare at him in that way he secretly found adorable. (When she wasn't genuinely pissed at him that is).
''You have worked for Gibbs longer than me and I know you don't remember all his rules by number.'' She gave him a look that dared him to argue. She knew he would. He was Tony after all.
He gasps and shoots her a look of disbelief before holding his head high in that proud fashion he often did when defending his senior field agent related abilities. ''I'll have you know, mon zee-vah, that there is not a single rule our fearless leader has thought of that I don't know.''
She snorts. ''Oh please. I bet you do not even know what number the 'never assume' one is.'' She challenged.
''Sure I do'' he replied without thinking ''never assume: double check. That's number…'' With that he tilts his head to the side in contemplation, ''I wanna say…seven?'' Ziva scoffs at his obvious failure to be convincing. ''Okay maybe eight.''
''Maybe?'' She mimicked, ''I thought you knew them all?''
''I do.'' He replied calmly. ''The rules themselves are more important than the math behind them.''
At that comment Ziva raised her hand in confusion. ''I agree. So why do you insist I should remember the numbers for all of them when you…''
''Hyundai.'' He interrupted her abruptly. This raised her levels of confusion even more. She turned to look at him and noticed something on the street had caught his attention.
''What?'' She asked glancing in the same direction he was before looking back at him. He now had his professional special agent face firmly in place.
''McGee said Barkley drives a Hyundai. It's not on his driveway and there's none anywhere in the area. He's not at home, let's go check it out'' With that he finally opened the driver's door and got out the car.
Ziva followed him outside, but was slightly skeptical about just marching up to his house and 'checking it out' as Tony put it. That usually meant finding a way into the house to snoop around or, if necessary, breaking into it. They started walking towards the bungalow in question. ''Are you certain he's not home? Does he not have a garage?'' She asked trying not to sound overly concerned.
Tony must have heard the almost nervous edge to her tone though because his head whipped around as he stared at her with a typically cheeky grin. ''Are you telling me my big bad ninja is scared of bumping into Chris Barkley the low-life part time dock worker?'' He teased. ''Worried he might get mad and yell at you?''
She took the question about as seriously as he intended it to be. ''I just do not want another suspect to sneak up on you and knock you out again.'' She replied matching his smile. ''You complained about the headache for days last time.''
''I took one for the team.'' He replied sounding dead serious. Ziva shot him a look of surprise. ''If someone's gotta take the hits, it might as well be the handsome and brave one. That's how it happens in the movies.'' She rolled her eyes. That sounded more like him. ''Would you rather it was you getting hit in the head by a vase?''
Actually she would. If it meant he wasn't the one getting hurt. But this wasn't the time or place to admit that. So she stuck to the way he'd expect her to answer. ''You are right. It might as well be you. Your head is the thickest.''
He regarded her for a few seconds before responding. ''That sounded way too sincere. I'm gonna try not to take it to heart.''
She chuckled lightly before taking pity on him and patting his back affectionately. ''Don't.'' She implored. ''And please do not feel as though you have to 'take one for the team' all the time. Teams are meant to work together, yes?''
''And look out for each other.'' He added before turning again to meet her gaze. ''I'll always take a blow to the head if it means you guys don't have to.''
His tone and expression were, again, completely serious. She felt a genuine wave of love and affection for him spread through her chest upon hearing that statement. She knows he always looks out for his friends and colleagues, even if he can be a pain in their ass a lot of the time. His sincere honesty had made her regret the dig she made about his head a second ago. She knew the brain within that head of his had been responsible for saving her countless times and that her loyal partner was anything but 'thick'.
They arrived at the front door of Barkley's bungalow to find the door was slightly ajar. Tony and Ziva slipped into synchronized bad-ass mode. Drawing their sigs and giving each other a sure nod before sweeping into the house and announcing themselves as federal agents. Every room they checked appeared to be clear so they went about looking around house for any clues or evidence that could help with the investigation. All the time listening out for any cars on the street outside.
Ziva looked around the small kitchen, her expression forming something akin to disgust. ''Just because you are going to stab your marine friend does not mean you should forget to do your dishes.'' She said whilst examining an old take out container with her nose upturned as if it was a dead rodent in her hand and not a 'Golden Dragon' noodle box.
DiNozzo chuckled before joining her in the kitchen. ''I thought you weren't making any assumptions today, little miss rule book.'' He replied as he stretched white gloves over his hands. And looking at the assortment of dirty plates on the countertop. ''This guy's gotta have left fingerprints all over this place. We lift some- gets Abs to run them- and find out if our slacker here's been stabbing anyone with bread knives outside bars recently.''
Ziva picked up a glass of what she presumed was milk at one stage and showcased it to Tony triumphantly. ''Well in that case it looks like we've found the jackpot.'' She said with a hopeful smile.
He frowned for a second before smiling in a way that could only mean…''Hit.'' Yep. Sure enough she had botched some sort of idiom for the millionth time in front of him. ''You hit the jackpot, not find it.'' He informed her in that overused correctional tone.
She rolled her eyes. ''Does it matter? I can actually see his fingerprints on it, Tony.''
He patted her shoulder. ''That's a fine discovery there, Agent David.'' He then suddenly cocked his head to the side and made a face that suggested he'd just had an idea. ''You stick to it. I'm gonna go check out the yard.'' He stated with authority before turning and heading towards the back door.
''Look out for men with vases lurking in the corners.'' She teased at him. They both knew by now that this was her way of telling him to be careful.
''Don't worry. I'm sure my 'thick head' could survive another whack.'' He shot back without any venom. He turned and winked at her before slipping out the door into the yard. She scoffed and failed to hide her slight smirk. She knew that non-insult would be thrown back at her at some point.
She went back to lifting the prints off the milk glass. Another routine she found herself doing so often that it had become a task she simply did on autopilot these days. A few peaceful moments passed before all of a sudden she heard raised voices. One of these voices was the unmistakable tones of her partner. Her gut was twisting and, before she knew it, she stopped her previous activity and headed to the back door that Tony had disappeared through the minute before. Her hand had just grasped the door handle when she heard it.
A single, loud gunshot.
The noise echoed through the DC air as her world froze in that moment. Her heart rate suddenly went through the roof and her stomach flipped. She was now acutely aware of two things: - That her partner/best friend was in the same yard the shot came from and that it definitely wasn't his sig firing it. Her body was on the move before her mind could catch up. She burst out into the yard and was almost knocked over by a man sprinting away from an open shed in the corner. He wore a shocked, panicked expression as his head shot round at her and then he managed to pick up speed after dropping what looked like a .44 magnum to the ground.
''Freeze!'' She yelled at him with her gun primed and ready to help him do just that if needed. He ignored her but was around the corner of the house by the time she fired off two rounds in the direction of his legs.
''Ziva!'' All of a sudden Tony appeared from behind her, apparently still in one piece. ''Son of a bitch shot at me!'' He explained in disbelief before running after said shooter. Ziva barely had time to register the feeling of sheer relief she felt upon seeing DiNozzo still on his feet, and seemingly not bleeding to death, before she took off around the corner after him.
The runner, who she assumed was Chris Barkley, was faster than one would expect a slightly overweight slacker to be. Tony was still ahead of Ziva as they both remained in pursuit of the potential murderer for an entire block. She acknowledged the emerging residents of DC stepping onto their front porches with curiosity but did nothing to reassure them that this was a federal matter. She was too busy wondering when Tony had been able to outrun her. Sure, he did used to be an athlete and was definitely faster over short distances. But as their mile total totted up to another block, she wondered how his plague-scared lungs were dealing with this.
Barkley was still just about in their sights when her veered off and headed down an alleyway. Tony and Ziva reached the end of the alley and slowed as they saw him disappear into a run-down warehouse shouting something about 'cops' and 'dope'. They took cover behind a dumpster and kept eyes on the warehouse entrance where a confused looking man, perhaps their suspect's accomplice, was squinting in their general direction.
They stealthily moved further down the narrow corridor and again took cover behind a dumpster that lay at the end of the alley. The open space between them and the warehouse was filled by a few cars and an open truck loaded with boxes of 'baking soda'.
''Well what do you know? That's Clint Eastwood's Hyundai over there.'' Tony said after a few labored breaths. He turned to see a confused frown on Ziva's pretty face. ''Dirty Harry.'' He elaborated. ''You know, Barkley had a .44 magnum- the most powerful handgun in the wor-'' He tried to continue his best Eastwood impersonation but was sharply shushed by his partner. She had her ear turned in the direction of the warehouse entrance with a familiar look of concentration now firmly in place in her eyes.
''What are your Jedi senses telling you?'' He asked over a slight smirk and a few more ragged breaths that Ziva hadn't failed to notice.
''I can hear them talking.'' She replied quietly. ''Sounds like Spanish. They are saying something about the DEA.'' She translated for him. ''And that they need to kill us…and get the hell out of here.''
Tony considered that for a moment. ''That would explain the cocaine he was weighing in his little magic shack in the yard.''
Ziva raised her eyebrows. ''Gang related, maybe?'' They always bounced ideas off each other, even if it sometimes led to arguments. But she then realized that now was not the time to think about the bigger picture. They just needed to call for back up and make some arrests. She turned to him to suggest that he should call Gibbs when she noticed that he had turned and leant his back against the dumpster, still catching his breath. His right shoulder was now in her view and she could see what was almost certainly a bullet wound through the recently made hole in his NCIS windbreaker. Blood was running down his arm, soaking into his sleeves.
''Tony! Your arm.'' She pointed out in shock as a wave of protective concern passed through her.
He glanced down at it as if it was just a slight graze. ''Oh yeah. That one stung a little bit.'' He said attempting to brush it off with a smile. Ziva was having none of it and instead glared at him like an angry mother. ''It's fine, Ziva. Let's just get these guys and you can put a band aid on my arm later.''
She rolled her eyes and cursed in what he guessed was her native tongue. ''Tony, forget about them for a minute. We need to get you out of here and call Gibbs for back up.''
He looked at her like she was crazy. ''They'll get away, Ziva. I'm more worried about what Gibbs will do if I let that happen than I am about this little scratch.'' Ziva sighed at his stubbornness, even if she knew her attitude was the same at times.
Tony got up from his seated position and looked over the dumpster. A loud shot rang out and a bullet fizzed in to the wall beside them before he quickly ducked back down with a grimace. ''First he shoots at me, and then he leads us into an ambush. I'm really starting to hate this guy.'' He shouted before firing off a few rounds in their foes direction.
''How many are there?'' The Israeli asked, still wincing at how close that shot came to hitting her already wounded partner in the head. He turned around again to lean his back against their cover with a few wheezy breaths. This time she was sure she could see the pain marring his features and her concern was raised a level once again.
He sighed heavily before replying. ''Probably too many.'' He conceded before removing the clip from his gun and checking his ammo. He looked at her and, upon seeing her worried expression, brushed a stray curl out of her face with far too much familiarity. ''You ready'' He asked expectantly. His tone suggesting she was supposed to know what the hell he was planning.
She didn't. ''Ready for what exactly?'' She was always able to read his thoughts, especially in serious situations like this. But right now her cage had been well and truly rattled.
Another bullet fizzed past as it ricocheted off the dumpster's side. ''Well we can't stay here.'' He shot back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. ''Not unless you were planning on being shot to death any time soon.''
She nodded quickly. Now he was making more sense. ''Exactly. We cannot stay here. Let's fall back and call Gibbs, Tony. Before you get shot in a more delicate area.'' She told, well more like ordered, him.
He considered that suggestion for a moment. ''Was that supposed to sound dirty? 'Cause it sounded like you were talking about my-''
''Tony!'' She cut him off sharply with wide eyes. ''This is not funny.'' She turned to look back down the alley to plan their daring escape.
She found him looking at her knowingly when she faced him once more. ''Ziva we can't go back that way. We'll be like fish in a barrel.'' He said diplomatically before something seemed to click in his head. ''By the way 'fish in a barrel' means we're easy targ-''
''I know what it means, Tony.'' She interrupted again with an eye roll. ''What do you suggest then? That we fly out of here?'' He seemed to seriously contemplate that option for a second. ''Oh for god's sake, Dinozzo. Try to take this seriously.'' She was in no mood for one of his undoubtedly impending superhero jokes.
He got up into a squatting position and peered around the side of the dumpster this time. ''Ok. I say we move forward.'' He supplied, apparently having made his mind up.
Ziva made her you are completely insane face at him. ''We move towards the people trying to kill us? That sounds like a well thought out plan.'' Her sarcastic dismissal of his idea actually ended up making Tony turn back to her and grin.
''It's not the craziest thing we've ever done, sweetcheeks.'' He winked. ''Cover me.'' Before she could process his sudden insistence on being an idiot, he had stood up and made a dash for the next obstacle that lay between them and their enemies. She let out a harsh expletive once again as she rose above the tin container, full of what must have now been more bullets than anything else, and fired multiple rounds in toward the entrance of the warehouse.
She was quietly pleased to see one of the perpetrators fall down in a cloud of blood. That moment seemed as good as any to follow her partner into the opening at the end of the alleyway they had foolishly rushed down a few minutes ago. This area was dotted with the vehicles they caught a glimpse of earlier and plenty of other random junk she didn't have time to label. But all of it would supply adequate cover if needed.
DiNozzo was crouched behind Barkley's car looking as though he was still struggling for breath after their unexpected run earlier. He gave her a nod as she took cover behind the truck full of what she now suspected was actually cocaine instead of baking soda. She replied in kind, confirming no injuries were sustained on their temporarily separate journeys.
''There's two of them now.'' Tony's shout found her ears above the sound of gunshots still coming from the 'them' in question.
Ziva didn't have time to reply before she heard multiple sets of heavy footsteps running in their direction. She spun from her cover and quickly put two bullets in the chest of one of the suspects and, luckily for her, Tony had done the same thing and disposed of the second one that was not too far behind the first.
Recognizing Barkley as the man he had just fatally shot, Tony looked at his companion with eyebrows raised. ''Something tells me our buddy here wasn't just a run-of-the-mill dock worker.'' He said with a relieved grin.
She chuckled at his not so sudden revelation. ''Whatever gave you that idea, Tony?'' Her sarcastic tone making a comeback.
''Well he seemed to have an unhealthy interest in the 'baking soda' industry.'' He responded, making air quotes with his fingers for emphasis.
Ziva took a deep breath as she tried to process the events of the morning they'd just been through. She ran a relieved hand through her curly hair before turning an endearing smile to her friend. ''You know, for once you're crazy plan actually worked, Tony. I'm impressed.''
He mirrored her relief fueled happiness. ''It's been known to happen.'' He replied with a toothy grin. ''But you were right about calling Gibbs.'' He reached into his pocket and got his phone out to do just that.
She moved to examine his forgotten bullet wound more closely. ''Yes and perhaps an ambulance would be a good idea as well. You have lost quite a lot of-''
''ZIVA!'' His sudden panic filled warning took her by complete surprise as he pushed her down behind his body at the exact second two gunshots rang out from the direction of the alleyway they had previously left unoccupied.
The ex-Mossad officer's perspective seemed to become slow motion in that moment. What was a split second for the unaccounted for shooter seemed like about ten for Ziva. He had barely had a chance to blink, let alone get another shot away, before Ziva had jumped to her feet and redrawn her gun to put one solitary, cold bullet into his forehead. As this was happening at what seemed like the speed of an action replay in a football game, her peripheral vision picked up Tony falling into a bloody heap at her feet.
When she eventually snapped out of her shocked trance she looked down at the man who just acted as her human shield and her heart stopped.
He had taken one in the chest and one in the side. Her ability to breath suddenly became questionable at best and she quickly dropped her gun and got down on her knees beside his still body. ''Tony! Tony can you hear me?'' He was still breathing. She ripped open his windbreaker and her chest grew tight at seeing his shirt underneath it soaked with blood. His lack of response kick started her inevitable panic. ''Tony open your eyes. Stay with me.''
She started to put pressure on his wounds as best she could. Knowing if he didn't get to hospital soon.. She wouldn't let herself finish the thought. She would not lose him.
Remembering that she actually had to do something about the whole hospital thing, she suddenly went for her cell phone only to realize there had been a slightly muffled voice coming from…underneath her partner? this whole time. His cell phone. ''Sorry, Tony'' She said softly, not realizing she'd been shedding tears until she choked on them, as she shifted his body slightly and retrieved his now red-tinged cell.
She raised it to her ear and somehow her panic levels were raised even more after hearing her boss' voice bellowing across the bullpen on the other end of the line. ''McGee! Where the hell are they?''
''Working on it boss.'' She heard the ever faithful agent's voice reply faintly.
''Well work on it faster.'' Her boss ordered as unreasonably as ever. ''DiNozzo what the hell is going on? Do you read me?''
Ziva managed to squeeze out a shaky greeting, ''Gibbs.'' Her voice cracked as she whispered to her fierce leader.
''Ziva? What happened? I heard shots.''
She chanced a look at her fading partner again but realized looking at him in such a state would only make her completely lose control of her emotions and lose her composure. So she closed her teary eyes as she tried her best to keep her cool. ''Yes. We got into a gunfight. One of them snuck up on us. Tony has…'' She trailed off and choked out a sob as she trailed her hand gently over her best friends increasingly pale face.
''Ziva…'' Gibbs' famous gut must have been screaming at him by now.
She took a deep and painful breath. ''He has been hit Gibbs. Three times!'' She sniffed back more tears trying her best not to completely break down over the phone. ''He threw himself in the way to save me and…'' She trailed off.
''McGee!'' Gibbs shouted again. ''And what, Ziva?''
She checked his pulse with her trembling hand. ''He's alive. Please send help, Gibbs. He has not opened his eyes. I think I'm losing him…''
''You're not gonna lose him, Ziva.'' She wondered how he could always be so certain.
''Got it boss.'' McGee's voice was suddenly laced with worry as he confirmed what she assumed was a trace on Tony's cell.
''With me. Call an ambulance.'' Gibbs had clearly stood from his desk now and was heading towards the elevator. She could hear McGee questioning the need for the paramedics. ''Just do it, Tim.'' Her boss' usually gruff voice softened, ''Ziva stay where you are. We're on our way. Don't give up on him.'' And with that he hung up.
The team leader usually only acted this way when he was seriously worried that the team had lost, or were about to lose, someone dear to them. The thought of them- and of her- losing Tony was simply unbearable to Ziva in that moment. She kept pressure on his chest with one hand and gently cupped his cheek in the other as she leant over him and silently begged whatever higher powers might be listening to let him open his eyes. There was nothing she would not do right now to ensure his survival.
When her silent begging didn't seem to work she reverted to expressing her thoughts out loud. ''I can't lose you, Tony.'' She stated quietly. ''I have lost so much. Please.'' He was still breathing, albeit very faintly. A teardrop had made the long journey from her eye to her chin before dropping on to her companion's neck.
Ziva could feel him slipping away and, despite Gibbs ordering her not to give up on him, she felt herself trying to put together a worthy farewell. Something fitting for the man who formed such a vital part of her soul. She closed her eyes against the pain in her heart. ''I am so sorry, Tony. I have let you down. I have let you down again. You deserve so much better.'' She whispered softly. ''I should have had your back.'' He always had hers, no matter what. He may just have given his life to prove that once again.
Moving her hand round to cradle his head, the reality of the situation suddenly hit her like a slap to the face. She may never get to touch him again. She may never get to see his joker smile or hear his light chuckle. She might not ever have him there to try and cheer her up on a bad day. All she might have left of her partner, the man who had completely stolen her heart without knowing it, were memories and dreams. Without him, would she ever be able to smile again? Would she ever be able to watch a movie, go to work every day or even go to sleep at night without feeling completely empty? His absence from her life may just be the final nail in the coffin of her potential happiness.
The world was about to become a much darker place and such a small handful of people would know why.
Her dark and hellish thoughts were interrupted when she felt a cold hand grip hers above Tony's chest. She opened her eyes in surprise to see his had half opened as he tried to focus on her. The relief she felt went some way to easing the pain of her broken heart.
''Ziva…'' He managed to squeeze out weakly before a violently wet cough forced its way from his throat. Her face melted as more tears formed in her deep brown eyes. ''You alright?'' He managed to ask, although it seemed talking was a hell of a tall order for his body.
Her mouth opened in disbelief. ''Tony, you have been shot three times and you are wondering if I am ok?'' Her expression softened when he could only manage a slight nod in reply. ''Yes. You saved my life. Not for the first time.''
''Well I'm glad my…'' Another painful cough. ''…act of heroism did the trick.'' He rasped out with anguish.
She squeezed his hand tightly, trying to stay strong for him. ''Well your act of heroism almost got you killed.'' She berated through her tight throat, not failing to notice how much she sounded like a mother talking to a hurt child.
He opened his eyes fully, despite how hard it clearly was for him. ''It still might'' he whispered. His loose grip on her wrist tightened as he brought her hand up to his mouth and placed a light kiss to her knuckles. ''Worth it though.'' He told her with an almost inaudibly quiet voice.
Ziva smiled intimately before leaning over and pressing a feather light kiss to his forehead. ''I told you, you do not always have to take one for team.'' She reminded him softly as she sat back up slightly.
Tony met her gaze with a sudden intensity that squeezed her heart. ''And I told you…'' He forced out, ''that I couldn't live without you. Nothing's changed about that, Ziva.'' Her eyes widened as she thought of when he told her that in the middle of that hell hole in Somalia and how surreal it felt to see him sat across from her in the sandy cell. He dragged her out of that horrifying situation and has since dragged her out of countless more. He was always there.
''What makes you think I can live without you?'' The thought of even trying to was a nightmare for her. His eyes misted over as he listened to her tear stained declaration. ''I need you, Tony. Where would I be without you?'' It didn't bare thinking about.
He coughed and wheezed breathlessly again before answering in typical fashion. ''Well…I doubt you'd be kneeling down beside a baking soda truck surrounded by dead guys.'' She had to laugh at that. He always knew how to make her laugh.
But as he went into another fit of coughing her thoughts turned serious again as reality came crashing back. ''I would not be anywhere.'' Of that she was certain. ''You have saved me more times than I can count.''
The coughs wracking his body stopped and his eyes closed as he appeared to slip into unconsciousness again. Her breath caught. ''Tony. Come back to me. Please don't do this.''
Just as she had begun to lose hope again, distant sirens grew louder. Before she knew it people wearing green jump suits and sympathetic facial expressions pulled her away from her partner. She reluctantly let go of his hand as he was lifted onto a gurney and shoved into the back of an ambulance, accompanied by all the paramedics trying to work their magic and keep Tony breathing.
Was that the last time she would ever see him alive? She realized that she wasn't breathing either. That she had suddenly been thrown into the unknown. She felt as though she was floating in a confusing world filled with nothing but the blur of red and white lights. Her entire universe had just been set ablaze. She'd never felt so lost. So helpless.
A strong hand was placed on her shoulder and she turned away from the retreating ambulance to find Gibbs' steely gaze piercing her very soul or, at least, whatever was left of it. It was a rare occasion though because, as well as seeing sympathy and concern etched over his stern features, Ziva could have sworn tears were forming in those blue eyes of his. He never cried. Never. That was how much Anthony DiNozzo meant to them. He held everyone together, not just her.
And that realization, above all else, caused her to completely lose control.
Her chin quivered before she completely broke down in a fit of sobs and cries of anguish in her ever protective boss' arms. A boss that knew he could be losing more than one agent on this fateful day.