Tugger, The best man
Summary: This is pretty much a parody of the Blackadder-Arrival of Lord Flashheart. It's funny! I decided to put it in cat's form. Think of the mating as a wedding thing alright? It's cute! Warning! This does contain Slash!
Munkustrap smiled as the ceremony began. He was finally being mated with the love of his life. His beautiful, sweet, innocent Mistoffelees. Skimble had been kind enough to do the ceremony and only a few people arrived. Such as his father, Jenny, Plato, Victoria, and Alonzo. He frowned then. Where was Tugger? He was supposed to be his best man. He then shrugged. O well. He would be mated to Misto forever! Nothing can ruin that. The bride's music started up and Munkustrap turned around proud and tall excitement and joy filling his eyes. Jemima walked down the isle first being the flower girl. Then Pouncivil followed her with two wedding rings on a purple pillow. Then it was Misto. He was gorgeous. He had a long white flowing silked robe that most Queens or Toms wore when mated. He was as Mr. Mistoffelees and he was holding a bouquet of roses and his eyes looked like they were about to burst with tears of happiness. Munkustrap extended his hand and Misto took it gratefully. They gave each other a longing look before turning to Skimble. Skimble opened his mouth to speak, but a loud crash was heard. They all turned quickly to the sound and saw Tugger.
"It's me!" he yelled running up to the alter drawing many queens attention.
"Tugger!" Munkustrap said shocked. Tugger smirked and did a pose.
"Tugger's the name, Tugs by nature!"
Munkustrap roleed his eyes. Misto starred at the tom.
"Where've you been?" asked Munkustrap shocked Tugger would act this way in front of Misto(coughs not really coughs).
"Where haven't I been? WOOF!"
Tugger did his signature thrust movement that made the queens swoon. Misto put a hand over his mouth. Munkustrap looked appaled.
"But I'm here now! So my older brother is getting hitched, eh?" said Tugger happily. Munkustrap nodded.
"What's the matter can't stand the pace of 'in' crowd!" asked Tugger grabbing Munkusrtap's….ahem….in emphasis. Misto would have fainted. Munkustap screeched and slapped the hand away hissing. Tugger ignored it and turned to Bomba.
"Hey queeny. You look sexy. WOOF!"
Bomba was panting.
"But listen wear your hair long I prefer it that way."
Bomba muttered to herself "I've got such a crush on him."
He turned to Skimble.
"And Skimble! Still worshiping God? Last thing I heard he started worshipping me!"
Munkustrap again rolled his eyes. He turned to Jenny.
"Woof! Jenny! I like it fame and fruity."
Jenny scoffed at his rude behavior.
"Am I pleased to see you or did I just put a canoe in my pocket? Down boy down!"
He then turned back to Munkustrap fluffing his mane.
"And now! Where's this amazing bird? The one who stopped my whole ability doing exactly whatever he wants."
He turned to Misto and grinned. He took his hand and span him much to Misto's surprise.
"Ten times a night."
Munkustrap cleared his throat.
"Yes. Tugger let me introduce my….mate…mate…Misto."
He stopped when Tugger dipped Misto and Misto looked like he was about to collapse in ecstasy.
"Why baby…."
He then kissed Misto fully abruptly on the lips. Misto made muffled noises and flailed for a few seconds before giving in and wrapping his arms around Tugger's neck continuing the snog. Tugger's hands roamed and he kissed hard.
Tugger let go and said "He's got a tongue like an electric eel, and he likes the taste of a toms tonsils."
Munkustap was furious and it took all of Skimble's strength to hold him back. Misto was practically swooning. Tugger turned back to Misto and looked deep into his eyes as Misto stared back absolutely hot and bothered. (*!* had to get it out.).
"You don't want to marry this jerk baby. Meet me on my hog in eight seconds and I'll give you the ride of your life! WOOF!"
"Oh and I'll give you a magical night Mr. Tugger!" said Misto running away down the ail with Tugger in pursuit.
"Oh yeah! Score tonight! I'll be keeping this one around for a long time! You can say we'll be…..mates. Later bro!"
With that he left to go screw Misto senselessly. Munkustrap stood there staring after them his mouth opened wide with shock.
"Misto…." he said saddened. Everyone felt pity for him. Then his eyes flashed to anger.
"Tugger!" he yelled running after them at top speed. Everyone sweat dropped. Poor, poor diluted tom. Didn't he ever notice the noises coming from misto's rooms at night? And when they made out right in front of him? I guess not.