Overheard
Disclaimer:- Don't own them just borrowing!
Episode:- None
Pairing:- Sandra/Gerry
Rating:- K+
Achieve:- . /group/new_tricksff/
Summary:- I've lost count of the number of hairline cracks there are in my heart caused by moments exactly like this but I know that one day it will shatter completely and then without ever knowing he held it he will have dropped the most precious gift I could ever give him and it will splinter into a million pieces never to be fixed again leaving me with only memories of what I hoped we'd be.
Author's Note:- in answer to Sarah's challenge in which one character should accidently cause emotional or physical pain to another. The story itself (without these top notes/ summary etc) is exactly 600 words so short and a bit angsty but no warnings so enjoy and reviews would be lovely!
"She's a real looker that one Gerry you should definitely go for it she's giving you the eye, has been since we walked in the door." I know that eaves dropping is not a good idea, my mother used to constantly tell me that you never hear anything good about yourself by eaves dropping but I was on my way to the bar and they started talking now I'm standing behind a pillar holding my breath waiting to hear Gerry's response to Jack's comment.
"You think? Yeah she's alright isn't she and she's legs to die for." My heart feels like it's about to break all over again now but then it does on an almost daily basis where he's concerned.
"Go on mate go talk to her all she can do is tell you to clear off and you're used to that by now." Now Brian is getting in on the act you know I used to think working with three "older" men would at least mean I didn't have to sit through these sorts of conversations but I couldn't have been more wrong they're like a pack of teenagers at times.
"Yeah I think I will, tell the guvnor when she gets back that I'll see her in the morning you can have my pint Jack." I can see him walking away, approaching the girl at the bar who as Jack said had been looking at him since we walked in the door of our local and I'm rooted to the spot. My stomach is in a knot, my heart is racing and the lump coming to my throat is something I've long ago got used to when he does this. When he walks away from me to some woman who will likely spend the night with him, having him make love to her as I wish he was to me all those feelings come back in a flood and it never hurts any less. You see I want it to be me he takes home at night, I want it to be me he looks at and talks about the things that he finds attractive, I want it to be me that he loves and wants to spend the rest of his life with but I have long ago accepted that will never happen.
"Where's Gerry?" I've perfected my impassive face, the mask I wear when they tell me he's gone again and I know it fools them for now. I know they accept my muttered compliant about him being like a rabbit on Viagra as irritation mixed with amusement but how long will I be able to continue fool them and him? How long will it be before I have to watch this happen once too often, how long will be he before he unintentionally breaks my heart too many times and I can't hold back any longer? I don't know what I'll do when that day comes, if I'll run and hide or just tell him how I really feel and accept that when he rejects me I will know for sure that things aren't meant to be move on. I've lost count of the number of hairline cracks there are in my heart caused by moments exactly like this but I know that one day it will shatter completely and then without ever knowing he held it he will have dropped the most precious gift I could ever give him and it will splinter into a million pieces never to be fixed again leaving me with only memories of what I hoped we'd be.