A/N: So I was looking through my files, and discovered this story that's been sitting around for years without being completed. So, uh, here it is? It's nothing spectacular, but whatever.
Warnings: None, really.
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to their respective owners, none of whom are me. Because, let's be a real: if I had an Axel of my own, I wouldn't be spending time writing fic.
Summary: "Santa?" Axel echoed curiously, rushing up behind Roxas, who was knocking—actually knocking—on a wooden door. "The big fat guy in red that brings toys to all the good boys and girls but doesn't, you know, actually exist?"
The Space Between
"I hate the cold," Axel grumped unhappily, following a disturbingly fuzzy Roxas. "Why are we even on this world? You said I'd like it!"
"I had to get away from them," Roxas replied calmly, staring warily around the empty square. "And you will like this world, as soon as I find my way to the other part of it."
Axel just pouted at the smaller boy's back and kicked up a bit of powdery snow, hoping Roxas would get to the interesting part already. This place, Christmas Town, was the height of mind-numbingly boring—emphasis on the numb. His internal heat kept him warm enough, considering how thick (and now fuzzy) his trenchcoat was, but he could feel the cold pressing against him and trying to smother him. He could at least do with a bit of a fight, but the Heartless seemed oddly quiet here, and the only entertainment he had was to watch Roxas.
At least watching Roxas never got old, even when the blond was doing nothing.
"Let's go inside for a minute," Roxas said softly, eyes on Axel's hunched form. "Santa will have a fire going."
"Santa?" Axel echoed curiously, rushing up behind Roxas, who was knocking—actually knocking—on a wooden door. "The big fat guy in red that brings toys to all the good boys and girls but doesn't, you know, actually exist?"
"Yes, him," Roxas said shortly, and then grew silent as the door swung open. There was a little woman in green with big pointed ears smiling up at them. Axel gawked.
"You said you weren't going to be back, Roxas!" the woman said cheerfully, ushering them inside. "Do you want some hot chocolate?"
"Sure, thanks," Roxas said, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a smile that somehow didn't reach his lips. "And some for Axel too, please. He's a friend."
Large brown eyes turned to Axel momentarily, before the small woman shrugged and practically skipped off. Roxas followed after her into a small room with a single couch and a fire roaring merrily in the fireplace.
If Axel had been a girl, he would have squealed. As it was, he was male and therefore above that (he thought), so he just dropped down as close to the grate as he thought would be comfortable for Roxas and patted the floor next to him. Roxas rolled his eyes but followed suit, settling himself down and resting his hand on the one Axel had left flat on the floor.
"Hey," Axel said thoughtfully, staring at the other doorway that the elf had disappeared through. "Think Saïx was an elf in a past life?"
Roxas threw his head back and laughed, leaning a bit closer to Axel and wrapping his fingers around the other's larger hand. "Sure," he said softly, giving Axel one of those smiles that was only reserved for Roxas' best friend. "And he grew three feet, developed a thirst for blood, and that x-shaped scar is completely natural."
"Hey, it could happen," Axel insisted, pouting. "You wouldn't believe who I used to be."
"And who was that?"
Axel hesitated, grinning sheepishly and rubbing the back of his head. "I was an action figure of some character in a video game," he muttered. He didn't sound like he entirely wanted Roxas to hear him. "My name was Lee, but they spelled it L-A-E. You wouldn't believe what the others said about that!"
"You've got to be kidding me," Roxas responded, eyes wide in disbelief. "Toys don't have hearts."
"They did where I came from," Axel snapped, glaring at Roxas. "I mean, we pretended we didn't—you wouldn't believe how spooked the older humans would get when we started talking to them—but we had our own lives and legends and everything when nobody was looking. I remember this one story I heard from a lost doll, about this ancient cowboy toy running away from his comfortable home to find a toy he didn't even like. It was wicked."
"So, how did the Heartless get you, then?" Roxas asked curiously.
"There were little toy-sized heartless. I tried to save some of the other toys, and, well…let's just say that when you're a toy, you don't actually have the skills of the character you were based off of."
"Little hero Axel," Roxas teased, grinning. "I bet all the girls just threw themselves at you and your manly plastic muscles."
Axel glared at him, but didn't get to respond—the elf returned at that moment, two mugs of hot chocolate in her hands. Roxas turned to her immediately, smiling his thanks as he curled his fingers around it and blew at the steam. Axel shrugged and took his own mug, sipping at the hot liquid and enjoying the feel of it burning down his throat.
"It's really good," he said to the elf, being polite mostly because Roxas was. "Thanks." He was rewarded with a familiar weight settling itself against his side and he grinned as a short arm wrapped comfortably around his waist. The elf looked surprised.
"I've got some work to do still, since Christmas is coming up," the elf murmured, backing away from them and smiling. "You don't mind being here alone, do you?"
"We're good, thanks," Roxas said from behind his mug.
As soon as the elf was gone, there was silence in the room. Axel found himself too content to talk, and Roxas (who hardly ever began a conversation anyway) was enthralled by his admittedly delicious beverage. He stared aimlessly into the fire for a few long minutes.
"Hey," Roxas said eventually, voice soft and sad and calling Axel's attention to him. "I know who I used to be."
The redhead stiffened, dismayed by this revelation. It couldn't bode well for anyone.
"I'm not mad at you," Roxas continued, giving Axel a gentle squeeze. "I know you knew, but I don't doubt that the Superior forbid you from telling me. But I found out by accident, from Santa. He told me that all Sora wanted for Christmas was to find his best friend and go home. Nobodies aren't on his list, but Sora was and I know now that Sora's alive. I've been thinking about going to find him. I want to know the reason for everything, the keyblades, Kingdom Hearts, how the two of us can exist at the same time…"
"I don't want you to go," Axel said abruptly, turning fully toward Roxas and frowning. "You know what will happen, don't you? I can't lose you."
Roxas just gave him a sad smile and got slowly to his feet. Axel stared at him for a long moment, then stood as well with a sigh.
"Let's go say hi to Santa," he said. Roxas blinked owlishly at him, then shrugged and led the way upstairs. Santa was perusing a long list, checking names off with a large quill, but he looked up from his work when the two of them entered. Axel gave Roxas a short look, one that the slim blond easily understood.
"I'll go let the elves know we're leaving and the mugs are still downstairs," he said softly, disappearing almost as if he'd formed a portal. "I'll be right back."
With Roxas gone, Santa Claus and Axel stared at each other.
"Hello, Axel," Santa said eventually, placing his list to the side. "I've heard a lot about you from Roxas."
"But you don't know me without him," Axel said coldly, turning his face away from the old man's honest eyes. "I guess I never existed to you, huh? First I was a toy, and then a Nobody—two things that never registered as real to anyone important. I suppose it would be too late to ask you to add me to that list of yours?"
"Even if I did, I get the feeling I couldn't give you what you want." Santa said gruffly. "Not only would you be on the 'Bad' list, but I don't have the power to give you a heart."
"I know," Axel said sulkily, crossing his arms and staring at the wall. "I can do without it anyway, as long as I have Roxas. I don't suppose there's any way you can get him not to leave the Organization?"
"My sleigh only carries toys, not decisions," Santa said softly. "For what it's worth, despite everything, I am sorry. But Roxas deserved to know, and you just can't deny the boy trying to save the universe."
Roxas took that moment to appear, thankfully keeping Axel from saying something nasty to the spirit of Christmas, and frowned at the blank look on his best friend's face. He stepped forward quickly, placed a gentle hand on Axel's arm, and, in his concern, didn't smile when he turned back to Santa and said his goodbyes.
"Roxas, I…" Axel began uncertainly as they stood on the doorstep, but Roxas silenced him with a look and he trailed off hopelessly.
"There's mistletoe above us," Roxas said softly. Axel looked up and noticed it immediately, the green leaves waving in a soft breeze. "Halloween Town can wait," he added, pulling Axel down into a gentle kiss even as he opened a dark portal behind the tall man and nudged him toward it. Axel knew immediately where it led to, and he smiled down at his lover, resting his hands on the Roxas' sides.
"I just want you to know," he said gently, allowing himself to be led wherever Roxas wanted him to go, "that I think I love you."
He hoped it would be enough.
A/N: Before you review, please keep in mind that this was written wayyyyy before Birth By Sleep came out, so I had no idea of who Axel's Other actually was. But, hey! I got the name right!
