Little one shot for you all (: Currently watching Angel of Death (such a BEAUT of an episode) and felt I should post this . . . I wrote it last summer, so I went over it and edited it to make it postable.

Has anybody else not been getting emails from ? I HAVEN'T. Again. Grr.

Any who, love you guys. Hope you enjoy this little thing . . .

The Life I Should Be Leading

Marian had been waiting for that whistle all night, and when she finally heard it, she thought that she could positively burst with now-free expectation.

'My father should probably be aware that there is an outlaw in my bedroom, you know,' she said, smirking without turning around. She had been organising one of her trinket boxes, not from necessity but more pure and utter boredom whilst she waited for this long awaited visit. She heard his chuckle and the footsteps across the room before he came up behind her, an arm around her waist. She smiled and tried not to just laugh with excitement. She was acting like a young girl, for crying out loud! Somehow - heaven knew how, but it was a dangerous gift - Robin always made her feel and act like this.

Robin was still laughing quietly as he pressed a quick kiss to the back of her neck; she could feel his warm breath on her skin.

'Maybe you need to tell your father that an outlaw plans on staying in your room, not just visiting.'

Marian was glad she was facing the opposite direction as she blushed scarlet at his oh-so-Robin remark. She regained her composure before turning around. Robin still hadn't removed the arm from around her waist - not that she was complaining.

'Or maybe I should tell him that I just forcibly ejected an outlaw from my bedroom. I am sure he would like that much better than your suggestion.'

'Spoilsport,' said Robin, flashing her one of his familiar, mischievous grins. 'You always ruin my fun.'

Marian laughed quietly. Robin's arm was still around her waist and she was aware of just how intimately close they were.

'Where are your men?' she asked. 'Surely they can't cope this long without your presence? I'm sure they're banging their heads repeatedly against trees from all of the frustration.' Robin laughed again - loudly – and it was only then that Marian realized just how true their joking remarks about her father had been. If he did happen to come up and find Robin in her bedroom, stood so close, she assumed that he would be less than pleased - especially if he also happened to find out just how often he came up here. But, really, didn't she deserve this? Less than twenty four hours ago, she had been set to marry Gisborne. She had sent Robin away, broke his heart . . . she needed to thank Much. She needed to thank him a lot.

Robin seemed to realise what she was thinking about and sighed.

'Are you not glad you didn't have to marry Gisborne?'

'Of course I am,' she said quickly. 'Or . . . I am not . . . or whatever makes sense.'

Robin gave another grin, but it was less prominent than before. Marian could sense that he was worried about her - about whether she was happy with this new . . . situation.

'I'm glad, Robin,' she said firmly, taking his face in both of her hands with a sudden surge of boldness. 'I am very, very glad. I didn't marry Gisborne. I didn't marry a traitor . . . . I guess I have Much to thank for that.'

'Don't remind me,' Robin murmured, looking away from her gaze. She kept her hands on his face, determined to make him look at her. 'Much won't shut up about how he saved the day.'

Marian smiled. 'And so he should. He has a lot to be happy about - he saved me from a life full of secrets and lies and treachery -'

'But isn't that what life will be like now?' demanded Robin. Marian could see the desperate worry in his eyes, raw and painful. 'I live in a world full of secrets and lies and treachery, Marian!'

Marian gave a sad smile and removed just one of her hands from his cheek.

'But the point is, I'm choosing this life of secrets and lies and treachery. These secrets . . . they're not bad secrets. They're necessary secrets.'

Robin lowered his eyes again.

'I am sorry that I . . . I gave up that easy.' His voice was incredibly quiet and gentle and Marian reminded herself that apologizing was a rare feat when it came to Robin of Locksley. He probably hadn't had much practice of the art in his lifetime and he was doing surprisingly well so far. 'I'm sorry Much had to be the one to save you.'

'He only helped me think,' said Marian, just as gently. 'I would have realized, sooner or later that . . . ' she trailed off, staring at the ground. She had removed both of her hands from Robin's face now.

'What?' asked Robin, his voice and stare heavy.

Marian was quiet for a moment. She took a step away from Robin and bit her tongue before sighing.

'He told me things I didn't really know . . . .well, I did know. I just hadn't really let myself think about it.'

'What?' asked Robin again.

Marian finally met his eyes and said, her voice delicate and almost silent as she spoke: 'That my heart belonged to another.'

The silence that spread between them was, for lack of words, deafening. For a short time they simply stared at each other. The intensity Marian could see in Robin's eyes was overwhelming. She opened her mouth to say something, but as she did, Robin shook his head, almost resigned to this fate, and stepped towards her, pressing his lips fiercely against hers. For a moment Marian was taken aback. His hands were on either side of her head and his body couldn't have been closer to hers if he tried. His lips fit hers perfectly and one of his hands moved onto the contours of her hips, nestled exactly the way she'd always imagined. His body pressed to hers, giving her the warmth she had secretly been pining for since the day he had returned from war.

'You,' she murmured against his lips as they pulled away for air. 'He . . . I belong to you.'

And then his lips were on hers again, desperate and bruising. She kissed him back with the same intensity, if not more.

For some time, they remained like this. But it wasn't long until there was a loud sound from outside - the braced neighing of a horse. Robin's head jerked sideways and out of the window the pair could clearly see Marian's father, Sir Edward, closing the doors of the stable and wiping his forehead with the back of his sleeve. Marian and Robin looked at each other one more time. Marian gave a sad smile, realizing that the moment had been broken - Robin needed to leave now. Still, it had been so long . . . Sighing, she put her hands in his hair and kissed him once more, gently and softly, and definitely much more chaste than before. He kissed her back, equally as sweet, and matched her sad smile as they pulled away.

'I should be leaving.'

'I suppose,' said Marian, reluctant to let him leave, but not stupid enough to try and stop him. 'But I would take the stairs. My father is outside.'

Robin broke out into a boyish grin. 'Well, you just took all of the fun out of my escape, Marian.'

Rolling her eyes, Marian jerked her head gently towards the door. She knew that she would be seeing Robin very soon - she had a feeling he would be visiting a lot more, now that he knew he could kiss her without being forcibly and physically rejected.

As Robin crept downstairs, he couldn't keep that boyish grin off of his face. The last few days had been . . . eventful, to say the least. He had lost Marian, got her back, lost her and then finally got her back again. He just hoped they could stay together this time. His grin didn't even vanish when he heard Sir Edward's shocked voice behind him (although it did fade slightly).

'Robin?'

Robin span around to look at Edward, trying not to wince.

'Oh. Well . . . good evening, Sir Edward.'

Edward frowned, obviously confused.

Robin grimaced where he stood. Robin Hood thought of escape plans pretty much every day, what with the Sherriff and Gisborne constantly on his back. But, really - how could he escape from Sir Edward?

'What are you doing -' Edward broke off, his eyes trailing towards the stairs. He sighed. 'Oh. Of course. Marian. But may I ask why you were so imbecilic to use the stairs and not the window, as you usually do?'

Robin opened and closed his mouth in shock. He knew about that?

'I, er - I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't . . . I mean, I don't -'

Edward sighed again, folding his arms.

'I have been naive enough tonight to assume my daughter had somehow found her own way out of her wedding. I presume that I was in fact wrong and you once again had something to do with it?'

Robin opened and closed his mouth one more time before giving a meek, 'Yes,' whilst staring at the ground. He was hoping that Edward would not notice how swollen his lips were or how messed up his hair was . . . . (it was even messier than usual). He was preparing himself for shouting, or at least a cold telling off. He was not, however, expecting Edward to laugh as he did.

'And I thought you'd just leave,' he chuckled softly.

Robin frowned. 'I did,' he started uneasily. When Edward said nothing more, he continued. 'I left this morning. But I . . . I came back.'

Edward raised his eyebrows and shut the door. Robin swallowed - he hadn't even realized it was open. Edward came back over to him and looked at him expectantly.

'And why did you come back?'

'Because I -' he cut himself off. Did he really want to say this, for the first time, in front of Marian's father? Shaking his head impatiently, Robin stopped.

'Because you . . .?'

'Because I love her,' Robin finished quietly.

And, for a moment, there was a chilling silence. Robin stared at the fire crackling away in the corner and waited anxiously for Edward to answer. However, Edward didn't answer. He just looked at Robin with a confused look on his face, as if Robin had broken out speaking German. Robin took the look to be one of disapproval and so continued in his rushed rant.

'I know. I don't deserve her. Marian deserves someone who can . . . who could actually give her a future. Who could give her wealth and a house and children and happiness . . . I can't give her all of that. All I have is a forest and some friends in pretty low places.' He laughed and rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. Edward was still watching him curiously but, this time (at least) he spoke.

'You must have a very low opinion of yourself then, Robin. Because I know Marian. Maybe - at least, not at the moment, you can't give her wealth or a house . . . but you give her happiness just by being there, you need to remember that.' Robin stared at Sir Edward, hardly daring to believe that this man had not, in fact, done the expected and told him off. He had done the opposite. Had he just (albeit, very informally) given them his blessing?

Edward sighed and the corners of his mouth twitched as he said 'And as for the children part, I don't particularly want to think about that.'

Robin laughed meekly as the realization set in. Edward had never been one for words much, but this almost seemed like a blessing - or as close as Robin was expecting to get to one.

'Thank you, Edward.'

Now smiling madly - genuinely, not in his usual, cocky manner - Robin hugged Sir Edward. For a moment, Edward was shocked. In fact, he remained shocked until Marian's voice called from the stairs, followed by the sounds of her footsteps.

'Father? I'm going to sleep now.'

Robin glanced at the stairs and coughed uncomfortably. Edward smiled knowingly and almost laughed at the startled look on Marian's face as her eyes fell upon the sight before her – her father being embraced by an outlaw she had undoubted feelings for. Edward couldn't help but notice the way her eyes lit up and her cheeks reddened slightly when she saw him, and it seemed that Robin reacted more or less the same.

'Oh, Robin. I didn't -'

Edward shifted at his daughter's feeble attempts at covering up her late night visitor.

'There is no use in pretending, Marian. Let us please just not focus on the fact my daughter has had an outlaw in her bedroom.'

Marian blushed further and Robin's cheeks blemished, too. For a moment there was silence in which Edward felt himself becoming more and more ill at ease by the moment. Finally, he sighed and made to leave.

'I'll just go up to bed. Goodnight, Robin.'

Robin looked away from Marian as if pulled from a trance and said vaguely, 'Goodnight, Edward.'

As Edward left, a stray and slightly scary thought flitted through his head. At least he hasn't started calling me father yet, he thought dryly. He chanced another glance back at his daughter and more than probable future son-in-law only to see Robin talking, his face barely inches from Marian's. Edward cursed mentally - he really had turned into a nosey codger in his old age.

For some reason, however, he felt his heart breaking for the pair. Because they deserved happiness. They deserved the perfect life together - long and full of joy. Yet, somehow, Edward knew that this could never happen for them. It just wasn't the life they were leading.

Reviews? Possibly?

Love you anyway, thank you for reading (: xxx