A/N: Rao! Ed'c sa The Hyper Al Bhed Jokester! Anyway... to stop confusing you Al Bhed illiterate people, Auin gave me another idea to write this story. Again,I must say thank you to her for giving me this idea and placing her here... again. I decided to write it before I forget this and also to entertain those who liked my first fanfic. I was making"How Nooj got his metal leg and his metal walking stick!" when I noticed I ACTUALLY had reviews. Broken Yuna said she personally didn't like Hypellos. Gee, hope the Hypellos aren't the reason Broken Yuna's name is that way... Insanity Creator added my FIRST fanfic to his favorites (I feel happy!) and Faery Ears... I apologize for my uh, weird humor. I'll probably make better ones in the future! One last apology to Broken Yuna and InsanityCreator! It's hard to do a Rikku one, but I will finish it! Also to some people out there who might've tried to give me a review but can't find theirs, I made the story before I even made my bio and didn't uncheckthe little box that said "Don't receive anonymous reviews"... hehehe sorry... -The Hyper Al Bhed Jokester-
The Ya Virus starts...
It's night time at Besaid Island. Lulu's on the side of the bed closest to the crib of their little baby, and Wakka is on the other side of the bed. All is calm and quiet. (A/N: Just like Lulu's calm and quiet and dead voice! XD Though it's dead, there's this charm that makes you like it...) Then a sinister dust particle landed on Wakka's nose. Wakka suddenly sat up on his bed and sneezed, "Aa...Ha...Ha... YA!" (A/N: Not those "Hai yah!" things the martial artists say when they hit stuff. He was about to say "Achoo!") "That was a weird sneeze ya?" muttered Wakka sleepily. Wakka dropped back into his side of the bed and fell asleep.
Meanwhile... The virus spread around Spira, like Mt. Gagazet, Bikanel, Zanarkand, and this red flying object called the Celsius. Oddly enough, the virus seems to affect the characters we know and not those extra people (ex. those random people who do nothing but walk around Spira). The effects may take some time to sink in, but eventually it will. The cure? Uh-oh... Forgot about that...
Morning comes... then passes by very quickly because I wake up in the afternoons and can't write anything while I'm asleep. So now it's afternoon...
Somewhere in Luca... Tidus just had a game the day before, and had an overnight stay in a hotel because he's the Ace of the Zanarkand Abes. While Tidus was having a comfortable stay at the hotel, the rest of the team slept on benches with newspapers for blankets outside since they could only afford one room in Luca, and Tidus got it. So after the game and overnight stay at the hotel, Tidus was walking aimlessly around Luca and avoiding little midgets, er, kids with blitzballs making him sign thier blitzballs or that creepy girl deciding which player from which team she should date. Then he saw a familiar lady running up to him in her trademark girly run.
"You were great Tidus!" said Yuna huffing slightly from running.
"Yeah! Nobody can beat me cuz I played especially for you." Tidus said with a wink.
"Oh really?" said Yuna blushing slightly.
"Um, Yuna. I have a question. Just to make sure you're really Yuna and not some die-hard fan who has some great impersonating ability to imitate Yuna... Do you love me?"
"Hell ya!"
"Woah... Since when were you that crazy? Oh well, love does weird things to you... Hmm... another question just to make sure. Did we kiss underwater in the hot springs?"
"Um... ya!" said Yuna, her face quite bright pink and warm after Tidus mentioning the hotsprings in public and after yelling"Hell ya!"... then she suddenly asked, "Silly Tidus! Why're you so paranoid ya?"
"I. Don't. Know. Ya?" said Tidus blankly.
"Did you play with Wakka in the games Tidus? I think I hear him... Ya!"
"Nope, didn't see a blitzball player with orange hair shaped like a dorsal fin. But I think I do hear him, ya?"
Ok... Let's leave those clueless characters for now... Getting curious at how the other characters are? Let's check out Gippal!
In the Djose Temple...
"Everything's under control right?" asked Gippal when the Al Bhed Machine Faction tried making the experimental machine work. It did work. For a few seconds, it was a calm machine examining its surroundings. Then it went beserk... Most of the crew members were buried in the rubble. Oh well...
"Oui eteudc! E ycgat oui ev ajanodrehk fyc eh fungehk untan! Dryd ec hud cibbucat du pa y gemman sylreha! Ed'c cibbusat du pa y... sylreha dryd tuach'd gemm ic... Fa'mm ryva veht cusi ica vun ed..." (You idioits! I asked you if everything was in working order! That is not supposed to be a killer machine! It's supposed to be a... machine that doesn't kill us... We'll have find some use for it...) said Gippal after the accident.
"Oac fa femm!"(Yes we will!) said the Al Bhed workers and at the same time trying to crawl out of the rubble the machine caused.
Okay, while Gippal and company (Heh heh heh... Al Bhed Machine Faction) are cleaning up their little workplace, let's check up on Tidus and Yuna...
"Wakka! You're here, ya?" called out Tidus.
"I can hear him but I can't see him! Where is he, ya?" asked Yuna.
"I don't think he's here... Maybe he's far away. That's why we can't see him, ya?" said Tidus.
Okay... They still don't get that they're hearing themselves and not Wakka... Back to the Djose Temple... Gippal managed to haul out his crew out of the rubble, with the help of some escaped crewmembers and machines. So Gippal was resting on the ground when one of the crew members ran towards him with a interesting story to tell.
"Gippal! Drini'c drec nammo ehdanacdehk sadym upzald! (Gippal! There's this really interesting metal object!) said the Al Bhed.
"Fryd? Frana ec ed?" (What? Where is it?) asked Gippal.
"Un, ed'c uidceta..." (Oh, it's outside...) said the Al Bhed looking down at the floor.
"Tisso..." (Dummy...) muttered Gippal. "Dryhgc yhofyo..." (Thanks anyway...) he says to the Al Bhed.
Gippal walked outside to examine the so-called interesting piece of metal. He saw an Al Bhed youngster rushing up to him with the oh-its-so-interesting-that-Gippal-must-see-it metal piece.
"I got that from digging in Bikanel Desert! Do I get a raise?" said the kid.
"Yeah, whatever... I need to keep this part for uh... obsevation purposes... Now hand it over!" said Gippal, waving the kid away.
So the kid walked away with his raise,and Gippal inspected the metal object closely with his good eye.
"Hey... I think I've seen this before... It looks so familiar..." thought Gippal.
Then, Gippal heard a moan close to the building outside the Djose Temple.
"Somebody... help me! I can't get up!" yelled the voice which sounded so much like...
"NOOJ! What the hell are you doing on the ground moaning like a sissy!" asked Gippal when he ran to the source of the noise, still holding that metal thing in one hand.
"What a funny thing to ask me Gippal? Can't you see my leg is missing! What the hell are you doing with it ya?" asked Nooj staring up at Gippal since... well he's on the dirty ground.
"Some kid told me he got this outta the Bikanel Desert..." said Gippal.
"Well that kid, ambushed me and stole my leg! I tried to whack him a couple of times with my walking stick, but the kid dodged all of the blows! Then he just grabbed my metal leg and raised it up and I lost my balance then I fell then the kid took out my leg!" spluttered Nooj.
"You lost to a kid? You've beaten fiends and we were supposed to be against Sin and YOU LOST TO A KID!" asked Gippal.
"Well... uh, ya?" exclaimed Nooj.
"You're hopeless, ya? I had a hard time attaching this on your stump or a leg the first time..." muttered Gippal.
So Gippal took out super glue and attached the scrap metal, I mean, Nooj's metal leg and then took out duct tape and taped Nooj's metal leg firmly in place. Then he reluctantly helped Nooj up and shoved him his walking stick.
"There! Good as new!" said Gippal. "Only a genius could do that, ya?" he added.
Okay... We saw Tidus, Yuna, Gippal, and Nooj... What about the others? They're all in the airship called the Celsius. Let's take a look and see how they are... ya? (A/N: Ack! I caught it!)
"Can we pick up Yuna now!" asked Brother impatiently.
"Hmm, it's been long already... Maybe she's been ambushed by people who want her auto-graph again." said Paine.
"Yuna! Where are you? Are you alright!" asked Brother in the radio thingy...
"Ya! We're just looking for Wakka!" asnwered Yuna.
"We? Who is with you?" asked Brother.
"Eteud..." (Idiot...) muttered Rikku.
"Fru yni oui lymmehk yh eteud, oy!" (Who are you calling an idiot, ya!) yelled Brother.
"Nobody, ya?" said Buddy simply. (A/N: Buddy's sounds like Arnold S. saying "ya". Arnold S. is the governor and the old Terminator right?)
"What's with all the ya's now?" asked the self-proclaimed wunderkid. "According to my analysis, not much other people besides the people we know are like this, ya?" added Shinra.
"There ain't no way I'll start talking like that!" exclaimed Rikku happily. "Ya?" she added oddly. (A/N: Rikku only has the accent of Arnold. She still has her regular voice...)
"Ry! Oui kud ed duu! Oy?" (Ha! You got it too! Ya?) said Brother.
"Well you got it first poopie head, ya?"
"E tuh'd lyna oui cdibet pmuhtea!" (I don't care you stupid blondie!)
"Dum- Dum! You're blond too!"
"Fimm oui'ni cu ikmo dryd Pyn gaab muugc paddan dryh oui, oy? (Well, you're so ugly that Barkeep looks better than you, ya?)
"Dryd fyc duu vyn, Brother!" (That was too far, Brother!) said Rikku with tears in her eyes... "You're a meanie you know that!" she screamed.
"Ur oayr? Famm yd maycd E's hud-" (Oh yeah? Well at least I'm not-)
"WILL YOU SHUT UP!" yelled Paine before Brother could say anymore. "For FIVE minutes, can we have silence? Please? I just can't understand how you two manage to talk non-stop! Ya?" added Paine. Paine's eyes went big when she said the "ya" part, and the "ya" sounded swedish. Paine covered her mouth after she said "ya".
"You heard nothing!" Paine threatened in her normal voice. "Ya?" she added with the swedish accent and the wide eyes.
Everyone looked at Paine and laughed really hard... That was until Paine started stroking her sword with an odd glint in her eye,then silence filled the airship. All of a sudden, Barkeep walks in.
"What hash happened to me, YA!" asked Barkeep. Everything he shaid, er, said was slow like before, but his "ya's" were fast and clear compared to his regular speech. Brother laughed at Barkeep like an idiot, because well... he's weird.
"Hey Shinra! Is there a cure for this thing? How'd it all start, ya?" asked Buddy.
"I have a guess it started in Besaid since only people who live there always say ya, ya? I'm guessing a sinister dust particle landed on Wakka's nose and Wakka sneezed causing this Ya virus and all of us have contracted this virus. We need to find all the other people who might have contracted this virus, ya?" said Shinra.
(A/N: I don't even want to get started on how HIS ya's sound like... Use your own imagination. I can remember him singing... it wasn't exactly pretty...)
"Um, Shinra? How do you know all this, and how are you so sure it started with Wakka, ya?" asked Rikku.
"I'm just a kid, ya?"
"Okay... I'll just stop asking questions... Ya, I will..."
Um, I'll stop there first... It's too long! I'll didn't even victimize Baralai yet! Or, Kimahri! But I will soon... It'll be in the next chapter. I hope I can finish it... I should! I will! Even though I'm like busy during the summer...