Hello God, it's me again. 2:00 a.m., Room 304.
Visiting hours are over, time for our bedside tug of war.
This sleeping child between us may not make it through the night.
I'm fighting back the tears as she fights for her life.
Well, it must be kind of crowded,
On the streets of Heaven.
So tell me: what do you need her for
Don't you know one day she'll be your little girl forever?
But right now I need her so much more.
She's much too young to be on her own:
Barely just turned seven.
So who will hold her hand when she crosses the streets of Heaven?
Tell me God, do you remember the wishes that she made,
As she blew out the candles on her last birthday cake
She wants to ride a pony when she's big enough.
She wants to marry her Daddy, when she's all grown up.
Well, it must be kind of crowded,
On the streets of Heaven.
So tell me: what do you need her for
Don't you know one day she'll be your little girl forever?
But right now I need her so much more.
She's much too young to be on her own:
Barely just turned seven.
So who will hold her hand when she crosses the streets of Heaven?
Lord, don't you know she's my angel
You got plenty of your own
And I know you hold a place for her
But she's already got a home
Well I don't know if you're listenin'
But praying is all that's left to do
So I ask you Lord have mercy, you lost a son once too
And it must be kind of crowded,
On the streets of Heaven.
So tell me: what do you need her for
Don't you know one day she'll be your little girl forever?
But right now I need her so much more.
Lord, I know once you've made up your mind,
There's no use in begging
So if you take her with you today, will you make sure she looks both ways?
And would you hold her hand when she crosses the streets of Heaven
The streets of Heaven
Hello God, it's me again. The same place as usual, at 2 a.m, room 304 at Greenwich Private Hospital. It's time for one of us to leave, Paul or me. I don't want to leave my daughter's bedside but we have our other children at home. They need us too. But what if she doesn't make it through the night? I need to stay.
I looked at our eldest daughter, Aurora Rose Levesque, between us and she was sleeping soundly. She had her teddy bear and her Dad's action figure in the bed with her. Paul was watching me and I knew he was too tired to start a fight. I looked back at Aurora and had to fight back the tears. Our daughter was fighting for her life and we couldn't do anything to help.
It's gotta be crowded up there, why do you need my daughter as well? She'll always be your little girl but I need her more than you do right now. She's my baby. I don't want her to leave this world, she will be all alone. She's only just turned seven; she is far too young to be alone. Who will help her up there? Who will be there to hold her hand as she crosses the streets of Heaven? Who will read her a bedtime story? Who will look after my baby? She needs to stay here with her family.
"I guess I'll head home then honey." Paul said, coming over to me and shaking me from my trance. I looked up at him and pulled myself up by his shirt. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to his chest. I moved closer to his warmth and sighed happily. I missed these moments but we didn't have enough time any more. Aurora was our number one priority.
"See you tomorrow morning." Paul whispered. I nodded and smiled happily.
"I love you." I said.
"I love you too." He replied. He walked over to Aurora and kissed her forehead. Then he walked out of the room and I sat back down.
Do you remember the wishes she made at her last birthday? I do, she told me afterwards and I haven't forgotten. She wanted to be better so she could live the rest of her life. She wants to learn how to ride a pony when she's old enough. Paul said not at the moment, not while she's so sick. She wants to marry Paul when she's older. She wants to marry her Daddy. The man she loves the most in the world.
I stood up and ran my hand over Aurora's sweaty head and kissed her forehead. She looked so peaceful when she slept. I ignored the needles in her arms and just looked down at my precious angel.
"Mommy," Aurora murmured. I held her hand tightly and she turned her head to the side. She gripped her teddy bear and relaxed again. I smiled and gently sat down.
God, it must be too crowded up there in Heaven. You don't need to keep putting Aurora through this. You don't need her up there as well. She will be your little girl later; I need her more than you. So does Paul, Aurora is our baby girl. Did you realise she's only just turned seven? I'm scared, and I know she will be. No-one will be there to hold her hand as she crosses the streets of Heaven.
"Good morning Stephanie, has Aurora woken up yet?" The Doctor asked, coming in. I shook my head and stood up, stretching. Paul came in with the rest of our children, Murphy, Hunter and Zaidyn. They came in carrying presents and Zaidyn's entire face lit up when he saw me. I hadn't seen him in nearly a week. I walked over to Paul and took Zaidyn from his arms.
"Mr and Mrs Levesque, you know she has been improving in little amounts so we need to take her for more tests." The Doctor said. We both nodded and a few more nurses came in to help wheel her bed out.
"Come on, we'll watch." Paul whispered in my ear. I nodded and he lifted Hunter up. We walked out of the room, following the Doctor and Nurses. Murphy ran forward and held my hand.
"I've missed you Mommy." She said.
She's my angel Lord. You've got plenty of your own; let me keep mine, please. Yeah, you hold a place for her but Lord, she already has a home. She doesn't need another one. I don't even know if you're listening but praying seems to be the only thing to do right now. Lord, have mercy, you lost a son once too. You know how it feels.
"Baby, are you all right?" Paul asked. I nodded and sighed. I kissed the top of Zaidyn's head and watched as they started Aurora's tests. She was still asleep and I was worried. What if she never woke up?
Heaven has got to be crowded, people are dying every day. Why does my little baby need to die to? One day, she can go up there and be your little girl, but I want to be there to meet her. Her whole family needs her here so much more than you need her. I know that once you've made your mind up, there's no use in begging.
I watched the Doctor put another needle into her arm and I stiffened. The Doctor frowned and turned to look back at me and Paul. Then he looked back at the computer screen. I looked up at Paul and he looked like he was going to be sick.
"What's happening?" I asked him.
"I have no idea." He replied. Murphy looked up at us and I saw the tears in her eyes.
"Is Aurora coming home?" She asked. I looked down at her and smiled.
"She will be, one day." I said.
This is hurting the kids just as much. If you do take my baby, please look after her. Make sure she looks both ways and hold her hand when she crosses the streets of Heaven. Please, that's all I ask for.
The Doctor came out of the room and frowned.
"This is a very unusual test result. We need to run even more to see if it's correct." He said.
"Why, what does it say?" I asked.
"Well... it is showing the same results for a healthy seven year old girl. We're taking all the needles out and seeing what happens." He said. I nodded and he walked back into the room. They took all of the needles out and we all went back to her room.
When Aurora woke up, she sat up and yawned. She hadn't been able to sit up by herself in months.
"Hi guys!" She said sweetly. I stared at her shocked and she looked at her arms.
"No more needles! Can I have a hug?" She asked. I rushed forward and hugged her. Her normally weak arms were strong around my neck. It was a miracle.
"I need to go to the toilet." She announced. Paul lifted her off of the bed and she ran into the bathroom. The Doctor came in and showed me all the test results.
"A miracle has happened overnight. Your daughter is no longer sick. She will be living a long and happy life." He said. I smiled and hugged Paul.
"Aurora has always been our little miracle." He whispered, kissing the top of my head.
"Well, we'll keep her here a couple of days but she'll be going home before you know it." The Doctor said. With that, he left the room.
Thank you, thank you. We get to spend more time with our baby girl. Lord, thank you so much. One day, I promise you, she will be crossing the streets of Heaven but for now... she's with her family.
Aurora came out of the bathroom and smiled up at us.
"I feel lots better!" She said. Paul laughed and lifted her into his arms.
"You're gonna be coming home soon!" He told her. I smiled at them and saw Aurora's face light up.
Lord... I truly thank you. I haven't seen my little girl smile in a while. Thank you for bringing my angel back to me. Thank you.