There was no possibility of walking that day. It was a typical November day, chilly, rainy, windy and grey. But today for once, I was glad of it. I never liked long walks. I could barely keep upright indoors, let alone outside. Especially when such walks included the chiding of my cousins Jane and Lauren combined with the pinches, pushes, and even blows of their brother James. He bullied and punished me continually. Every nerve I had feared him and I shrank whenever he was near, making me even clumsier and tongue tied than usual, to the amusement of the girls. My Uncle Charles had been dead for five years, leaving me to the inattention of his wife and not so tender mercies of her children. I was more nervous than usual during James's holiday from school. He seemed to be always looking at me or for me, seeking me out when I was alone. There were moments when I was bewildered by the terror he inspired, knowing I had no appeal whatever against his menaces. Therefore, I cherished my opportunity to slip into my undiscovered refuge in Uncle Charle's library. Here, I could hide behind a velvet curtain in the shelter of a window seat, watch the storm outside' and escape into the other world of my latest acquisition, Treasure Island. I was whisked far away from my loneliness and fear on a ship in the warm Caribbean sun, hunting for pirate treasure. I was happy in my way and feared only interruption. That came too soon I thought as the library door was slammed open.
"Boo! Madame Mope! I can find you wherever you go! " cried the voice of James, but then he paused momentarily finding the room empty. I heard Jane and Lauren tumble in behind him. I wished fervently that my hiding place would not be discovered.
"Bella is not here, James. Jane let's go tell mama she has run out into the rain- bad animal," Exclaimed Lauren petulantly.
James too calmly replied, "To be sure, Jane, she is in the window seat."
I came out immediately, for I trembled at the idea of being dragged out by James. James was a school boy of 16 having been mysteriously taken home early for the winter holidays by his mamma "on account of his delicate health." A dubious explanation considering James's character, made more so by furtively whispered lectures I occasionally caught my aunt giving to James. He was 5 years my senior with wiry but deceptively strong build, making any resistance futile. My cousins, all taking after my Aunt, were tall and had light hair, piercing blue eyes with sharp but attractive features. I was often taunted by Lauren and Jane for my contrasting plain brown hair and eyes, as well as my small size. I never dared mentioned that being the youngest by at least 3 years accounted for my lack of stature if not beauty.
He gestured for me to stand near him. Habitually obedient, I walked closer. "What were you doing?" He questioned, pulling the book out of my hands.
"Reading." I croaked out. Seeing Jane's smirk out of the corner of my eye, I knew he would soon strike. Accustomed to James's abuse, it never occurred to me to resist. My only care was how to endure the blow that would surely come. It did not come at once. Usually, his waiting he knew, made me more anxious. Yet, this time seeing my only joy being held in his hand, knowing I would never see it again, a strange calm settled on me. I looked at them and mused how ugly and disgusting they were to any who could see behind the beautiful façade-monsters. I wonder if he read that notion in my face, for it was then that he struck me forcefully across my face. I tottered back a step or two, noticing a metallic taste in my mouth. I could almost feel Jane's malignant stare and it seemed as if it goaded James on. He stepped forward, slapped me again, and then gripped my arm wrenching me to the door.
"What. What. Wait- What are you doing?" I stuttered in confusion as he dragged me down the hall. Usually, his bullying was done with the giggling and inciting audience of his sisters, but they were left stunned standing in the library.
"You! Your going in there, for your impudence and for the look you had in your eye two minutes ago," he growled as I realized where he was taking me, the Red Room. The Red room was a spare chamber, never slept in unless the rare influx of visitors at Gateshead hall rendered it absolutely necessary to use. However, it was the largest and stateliest of bedrooms, unused because it was where my Uncle Charles had died and servants said his spirit still resided. I half believed these stories. Once, the maid Jessica spoke of feeling a cool breath on the back of her neck while she was dusting. The oversized furniture, matching the crimson walls made the somber room macabre. I knew in that moment that anything that was dark and dreadful could happen in that room. I resisted all the way, a new thing for me. I was conscious that my new mutiny made me vulnerable to strange penalties, but like any other rebel slave I felt resolved in my desperation. I dragged and screamed like holy terror, but he still made it to the door now cursing and swearing half pushing, half tossing me to the floor. He quickly stepped in and closed the door, locking it with a key I didn't know he had while I scrambled up.
"Now we'll see," he said with a strange new look of determination as he stalked me.
But I found myself looking straight back at him for once and I thought to myself, "Yes, we'll see. I'm not as meek a lamb as you think." I felt nothing, none of the blows, kicks or punches, but in the back of my mind I knew I hurt him somehow with my retaliatory scratches and kicks as I struggled to escape. I was only faintly aware of the door rattling and the shouts of Lauren, Jane, and more than a few servants to be let in. He finally caught hold of both my arms and slammed me against the post of the large mahogany canopy bed, the back of my head banging on it making my vision darken for a moment. Suddenly, his hateful face was on mine, his breath on my mouth. I reflexively bit down and he yelped as he stepped back, grabbing his mouth. I didn't hear what he said to me as I climbed over the bed, towards the door but then his hand grasped my ankle as I tried to climb over the baseboard. As I fell to the floor, I felt and heard a sickening crack of my leg breaking. I lay on the floor next to a dresser stunned with pain as he crawled over me dragging my skirt up with him. Suddenly, I felt so cold, and heard a loud bang with a responding oomph. James fell to my side, unconscious, a dresser drawer inexplicably pulled out over me where James had been. The clattering door suddenly opened with the girls and a gaggle of servants falling through. Then, my Aunt, just now arriving at the scene, stepped through the gawkers and surveyed the room. Her disdainful look fell on me as darkness finally came.