I was bored. So whatever this is, I can't remember it. But anyway, I was thinking back to Pirates of the Caribbean 3, you know that part where all those people are getting hung? Well, anyway, they've finished the song they were singing, and a few more people got hung.

The line of handcuffed men and women moved up as six more people walked on to the stage. The dead bodies were removed. There were a few children spread between the convicted adults. The reason they were all there? Supposedly, they'd associated with pirates. Charlie poked his head out, and looked up and down the line. Hmm, not long to go now. He watched with an almost bored expression as a guard pulled the lever, and six more bodies were removed. It was the same old thing after another. Couldn't they just hurry up? What was the date? He looked down at his shiny new silver watch. Wasn't he lucky, it had a place for the date. Hey, he thought, isn't it my birthday today? Charlie did some quick calculations in his head. He yelled out as loud as he could, over the next lot of people choking to death in the ropes. "Hey! Today's my birthday!"

Everybody turned towards him. All the convicts, guards and spectators burst into song again.

"Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday dear… erm, what's your name?"

"I am Charlie, who are you?"

There were various shouts as everybody tried to tell Charlie their names. Gradually, the noise died down again, and they burst into song. Again.

"Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday dear CHARLIE,

Happy birthday to you!" Somebody yelled 'hip hip', and the rest of the crowd shouted 'hooray'.

Charlie thanked the crowd. "Well, I can't say this has been the best birthday, but I'm sure there are plenty more to come. I'd like to thank my mum and dad, who unfortunately couldn't be here today… More importantly, I'd like to thank--" And then Charlie was speechless. He was now hanging from the piece of rope, dead. The colour drained from his face. He went all cold. The crowd cheered on Charlie for his speech. Charlie had lived 16 years to the exact millisecond. In that time, what had he achieved? Nothing at all.

Heh, the life and death of Charlie. Who is Charlie, exactly? Don't ask me, I have no idea. I'm only the author, after all.