Set between seasons two and three, here is a story I've had in my head since I went to see Wicked in London in August 2013. This song had me welling up when I saw the show, and, even then, as the first verse ended I knew this would immediately become a Caskett song in my head.
For the Bubble Death Girls, who I met that very same day.
A disclaimer: I don't own the lyrics, Steven Schwarz wrote them. If you're considering sending me a message about that, thanks for drawing attention to my inability to write a successful Broadway musical. I already got that memo.
He could be that boy
But I'm not that girl
"Come on, girl, the cab's waitin'!"
Lanie is rushing her, so she forgoes the eyeliner and extra flick of mascara, since it'll be dark in the theater, and who's she trying to impress anyway? It's not like she's going with Castle.
Shit.
Kate growls at her traitorous brain as she slips her heels on and flicks at her dress before she hurries out of her bedroom. Her best friend is waiting with a jacket for her and as soon as she's put it on they're ready to head out.
"I cannot believe you haven't seen Wicked yet, Kate! You're gonna love it, I just know it!" Lanie enthuses for the whole cab ride and she can't help but smile indulgently.
"And just how much are they paying you for advertising?" She grins.
"This is all for free, because it's worth it! And the tickets we got are really great too, we totally lucked out with these."
"Yeah? What row are they on?"
"I'm not gonna tell you, 'cause you'll say it sounds crap."
"Come on, Lanie, tell me!"
She shrugs, "Well, okay then, but I warned you." Kate rolls her eyes. "Row Zee-Zee. Seats one-oh-eight and one-oh-nine."
Kate waits a beat before she replies, "They sound like they're at the back."
"Ugh! I knew you'd say they're crap!"
"I never said that!" Lanie folds her arms and looks out of the window. "Come on, Lanie." Kate nudges her arm. "Explain to me why they're good seats."
Lanie turns back to Kate with a look that says don't you dare interrupt me, Kate Beckett. Kate does as she's told. "They're on the orchestra floor, and yes, they're the back row, but you're a cop and you like sitting with your back to the wall. Row ZZ is also a short one, so they're quite near the middle of the theater, but you can still sit at the end of the row." Kate frowns.
"Am I that predictable?"
Lanie laughs, "Yes honey, and I'd rather you sit at the end anyway, wouldn't want to have to deal with other people's broken arms and legs when you've climbed over them to get out and help if there's an emergency."
She tries to hide her smile "Thanks, Lanie."
It's not surprising that the theater is packed when they arrive with twelve minutes to spare. Lanie lets Kate weave through the crowd, aiming for a merchandise booth.
"You can get your t-shirt later, girl, let's get inside!"
Kate laughs, "I don't need a shirt, just the playbill!" She sneaks her way closer to the booth and waves her ten dollar bill to the busy guy behind the counter, calling her order out to him, "One playbill, keep the change!"
He parrots it back to her and reaches for the cash as she takes a booklet with a small smirk. Lanie slips her arm through Kate's and pulls her along to the correct door to get to their seats. "Would you stop trying to read that while you're walking?"
She pulls her nose out from the playbill and smiles sheepishly at Lanie. "Sorry? I'm excited now!" Lanie just shakes her head as Kate goes back to drinking in every article, biography and photo like a case file.
"Should I be quizzing you on that in the intermission?" Lanie asks with a smirk.
Kate's about to sass back at her, but the lights start to dim, the band begins to play, and every other cliché she's ever heard about the magic of the theater from Martha comes to life. The colors are so vivid, and the costumes dazzle her, she can't see one outfit that's the same design as another. The band is so loud but so perfectly mixed that she can hear every individual strum across guitar strings and beat of the snare. She's swept along in the tidal wave of the story, not letting herself try to guess what will happen for once, even though she knows The Wizard of Oz, film and book versions, she's getting the feeling this isn't a show you can assume anything with.
So she doesn't.
She adores Popular, and claps and hollers along with the rest of the audience at the end. Lanie spies the huge grin across her face and pats herself on the back for having such a great idea, making Beckett get out of her apartment and out of the precinct to just do something fun. She hasn't heard her friend laugh at all since Writer Boy left for the Hamptons, and that is entirely too long ago as far as she's concerned.
Kate finds Dr Dillamond's removal from the school shocking, her jaw slackening as she watches the events unfold from the edge of her seat, and then the rescue of the little lion cub has her eyebrows knitting together with concern. Fiyero and Elphaba wind up having a convoluted conversation that's probably about the cub but also about themselves and something in the back of Kate's mind pipes up about it reminding her of Castle.
And then... then Elphaba begins to sing. And it's like she's pouring the words straight from Kate's heart.
And Heaven knows
I'm not that girl
She'd almost thought Castle could have been... but no. He'd gone with Gina. He didn't chose her. He chose the beautiful blonde, the one who already knew how to win his heart. Not Kate Beckett, who tripped over her words when it really mattered, and had absolutely nothing to make him want her.
A sob is escaping her chest before she even realizes she has tears streaming down her cheeks, and as the song is ending she is out of her seat and heading straight for the exit. In six quick steps she's in the corridor connecting the auditorium to the foyer with the door closed behind her and she doesn't even try to hold anything in. She can hear the music start up for the next number and it's at that moment she notices a pair of clean, shiny shoes in her line of vision. They're swiftly joined by a hand holding out a packet of tissues, and she looks up to see the guy who sold her the playbill.
"Here." He offers her the tissues again with an understanding look, and she takes them gratefully, trying to take a deep breath. "I'm Sam."
"Kate." She pats her cheeks and blows her nose. "Sorry."
He shrugs it off, "Don't be. Happens at least once a week. It's an emotional song." She laughs mirthlessly. "Is it about a guy?" She confirms his question with just a look and he nods knowingly. "If he left a beautiful lady such as you behind, he's not worth the tears."
This time her laugh is genuine. "Does this work every week?" Sam laughs with her.
"No. About one in four." He stands up and offers his hand to help her up. "You don't want to miss the Act One finale. I think it'll help."
"Yeah? What's so special about it?"
"It makes my scalp tingle every time I hear it." He says it so matter of factly she tilts her head to the side, trying to work the comment out. "Trust me, just get back in there so you don't miss it."
"Alright. Thanks Sam."
"You're welcome, Kate."
With a final sniffle and a deep breath, she silently slips back into the theater while the Wizard reveals his secret to Elphaba. And by the intermission, she's got her Beckett armor firmly back on.
"I'm ready for that pop quiz now, Lanie."
They grin at each other and the incident is never mentioned again.
Please head over to lousiemcdoogle's profile to read Broken Summer, as I spent most of my spare time in the last two months writing chapter five for that story - it was great fun to collaborate with Lou and, well, I just think you should go read it. Also, watch out for a new chapter of No Sleep Till Brooklyn very soon! :)