Author's notes: Hello, everyone! So glad you made it! :D
Under the Star Wars and Star Wars the Clone Wars FanFiction headings, there are many parodies. The hilarious and marvelous parodies written by Snips Skywalker and Bluesaber3 inspired me to write my own.
No, I don't own Star Wars.
Yes, I have a lightsaber.
…yes, it's a plastic one.
The enemy of my enemy is me.
Brothers fighting again! After a game of hide-and-seek gone awry, Savage Oppress found his brother, Darth Maul, alive! Even though Maul was cut in half by Obi-Wan Kenobi over ten years ago! Savage started yelling at Darth Maul for not coming out of hiding earlier, but Maul had played hide-and-seek so long he thought he was a spider. Maybe it's a guy-who-was-cut-in-half thing. So Savage decided to take Maul to a creepy witch in hopes of a cure. Meanwhile, Maul was angry at Obi-Wan.
Savage yelled at Maul to be patient since they were almost home, but Maul wouldn't stop alternately asking if they were there yet and humming the Mission Impossible theme song.
At the same time, halfway across the galaxy, Obi-Wan angrily told Anakin to "shut that horrible song off!"
"What, this song?" Anakin turned up the volume.
"Yes, that song! I hate the Mission Impossible theme song!"
"Scandalous! But, since you don't like it…" Anakin turned the volume down and went away, carrying his boombox with him.
Thirty minutes later, Obi-Wan discovered why Anakin conceded to his wishes so immediately. Anakin had hacked into the Coruscant's public-broadcast system to play the Mission Impossible theme song. Over and over and over again.
Back to Savage and Maul. They were finally at Dathomir, where the creepy witch lived. Savage told Maul it was time to get out, but Maul refused, saying right now was his be-angry-at-Obi-Wan-by-saying-his-last-name-over-and-over-again time. When Savage tried to press the issue, Maul threw a clipboard at him. There, on the clipboard was a neatly-written schedule.
6:30 a.m.: wake up just for the pleasure of turning off the alarm and going back to sleep again
8:30 a.m.: wake up for real, and stare sleepily at the ceiling
8:38 a.m.: get out of hammock and throw 17 darts at the Obi-Wan dart board
9:00 a.m.: breakfast, choice of house flies, fruit flies, dragon flies, or French toast. Pancakes and popcorn on days that are a multiple of 17.
9:17 a.m.: obsess over the number 17
9:34 a.m.: break a plate
9:35 a.m.: draw on the walls with permanent marker while humming the Mission Impossible theme song
10:00 a.m.: wash off the walls
10:07 a.m.: give up on washing the permanent marker off the walls
10:08 a.m.: stare at a digital clock
10:09 a.m.: print a bunch of pictures of Obi-Wan off the internet and then color over them to make him look ugly
11:46 a.m.: hum the Mission Impossible theme song; if on a trip, alternate with asking if you're there yet
1:17 p.m.: show your anger at Obi-Wan by repeating his last name over and over again
1:51 p.m.: watch Episode IV: A New Hope
Savage stopped here. He looked at the clock. Sure enough, it was 1:20 p.m.
Author's notes: I hope I was funny! Please leave a review!