Tomoyo has always been my favorite anime character. If all goes well, I'll continue updating these drabbles, but don't expect them to be long. I'm not the best author, so expect occasional errors ;
Liminality
Ever since she could remember, she always sacrificed her happiness for others. Naively believing that her happiness is dependant on others.
How foolish was she?
She stared emptily as she read through her newest piece of music.
She often glanced at pictures of her younger self. Whatever happened to that smiling girl that was staring at her? So many sacrifices. What for? That was a question she always wondered. Never has she received a 'Thank you' for her actions. Neither did she regret anything.
Can't anyone see through her mask? She doubts it, but she will always remain that smiling friend who will give up everything for others.
"I'll be there, by your side, in the land of twilight. In your dream, I will go, till we find the sunrise." She wondered to herself, why did her teacher choose this song?
She paced around the room as she studied the music. She scanned the music, every note, every lyric. Perfectly in her range, perfect to bring out every emotion she ever repressed. The musician in her couldn't help but appreciate the song. So hauntingly beautiful, how she wished her ears could have the pleasure of listening to the string version of this song.
"You are lost in nightmare, deep in blue illusion. One more kiss to wake you up. Come be mine. You are mine." For every love in her life, she chose for them to find their true soul mate.
Her dearest Sakura-Chan. Her innocence was almost unnatural to her. She wished she could express her real feelings to her, but she knew she will never be hers. Her heart belongs only to Syaoran. She wondered, maybe she misinterpreted the feeling as love? Sakura was the first real friend she ever had. Maybe still misinterpreted it as love? Eriol, as much as she found him charming, could never be hers also. There would be too many differences, too many secrets that she will always want to know.
"I will be there seekin' for liminality. No destinations to see, I wander in quiet places so dark as eternity. I'm crying calling your name. I'm searching for you." She wasn't searching for anyone. She was searching for herself. Where did she fit in? She understood that life wasn't a puzzle, but she always felt like an outsider.
"Dreaming in the land of twilight. We are in the land of twilight. Deep in blue eternity. Search for liminality" She thought about the definition of 'Liminality' Which meant 'In between'
She paused staring emptily at the paper in reflection as a voice interrupted her thoughts.
"So, why did the songstress stop?" Yukito asked politely his brown eyes watching her intensely. As if he was trying he was trying to figure out what she was thinking
Her amethyst eyes met with his. How long was he watching?
"Oh! Tsukishiro-san, what a pleasure to see you here!" She said smiling
"There's no reason to be so formal." He said with a light chuckle
"I'm sorry; it's a force of habit." She said as she looked toward the ground.
"You seemed...distressed while you were singing. Is anything wrong?" Yukito asked.
He must have been watching her long enough. She simply smiled at him.
"You shouldn't worry about me. I'm fine! ."
"You shouldn't lie to me." He said. Wow, he must've been around Touya too long or Yue is influencing him.
She sighed softly. It wouldn't hurt to open up to him. Maybe he can give a little insight.
"Have all you ever wanted was a 'Thank you?'" She asked as she sat down in the piano bench. Yukito gave her a curious look as she started to explain more
"I feel like I sacrificed so much because I simply wanted my friends to be happy. I foolishly thought..." She paused. She felt she was revealing too much.
"Thought what?" He asked hoping to get more information. Usually, she was a reserved person, how much she was revealing is surprising.
"If they were happy, I will be happy. Now, it seems, they're happy and I'm lost."
The was a long pause of silence before Yukito finally spoke up.
"You did the thing that most wouldn't; you put your feelings before others. You knew the results of your actions, and you selflessly pursued them. If anything, thank you Tomoyo, Thank you for making others happy."
She looked at him in confusion before smiling.
"Thank you, Yukito-kun." She spoked softly as she hugged him, "I really needed it."
He was correct. She did want them to be happy, and they were. She never had any regrets, she just wished someone would return the favor.
She slowed pulled back from the hug. Did they just call each other by their first names?
"Tomoyo?" She asked
"Yukito-kun?" He answered mocking her as he chuckled lightly. Still the same as ever, happy-go-lucky. He was happy to help solve one problem of hers. He remembered when he questioned his own existence.
She stared at the clock as she grabbed her bags. "I'm sorry, but I must go. I hope to meet up with you soon!" She said placing her bag on her shoulder turning to leave
"Allow me to join you." He said walking toward her side.
A simple nod was her answer