'Nakashima Ayumu'

Typical Japanese name, a normal Asian baby with black hair and eyes, and born into a normal family.

But I supposed it might not surprising if there was something wrong with her.

Not with her body,

But with her mind and world.

It was a beginning of the existence that didn't suppose to exist.

.

.

It would be too clinch when I said I was reincarnated.

But unfortunately, it was true.

"Reincarnation: rebirth of the soul in a new body"

—Such a sick joke existed after all.

"Ah, aren't you cute little thing, Ayumu-chan" My mother, Hikari, cooed at me from above the crib. She has long beautiful black hair, dark as a night sky. Her eyes show kindness and love.

She was not my mother. She was Ayumu's mother, but not mine.

That woman would never smile like that, her eyes never show the kind of love, and she didn't even have black hair.

My father who named 'Masao' smiled and stood quietly neared his wife. His irises were painted in black jet ink and he had the same long hair the same as my mother.

He was not my father. My father never had black eyes and didn't or does favor long hair.

I didn't cry, move, nor did things like the other baby did. I just stared. It was when a week had passed and my mother was scared. My father lost hope. The doctor said he didn't know what happened to me.

At that time, I didn't really understand the situation.

To me, it was like I had shrunk, grown a dark black lock of hair and had two giant strangers hovered over me all the time.

Not to mention all I could do was breathe, slept, stared, and peed.

Err, let's again not mention the part when my mother tried to breastfeed me, only to discover that if the baby didn't suck, it was not a breastfeed.

Blessed the young mother.

Back to the topic, after I was born, my underdeveloped eyes made everything seem blurred and hazy. When my two stranger parents took me with them to see the doctor, he or she put their hands above my chest and it started to glow. Whoa, maybe I was reborn in harry potter, they could explain these green thing. And that was when I felt something wrong when the doctor used that thing on me.

It was like there some resonance inside your body, and I was frightened and terrified that my body started to stiffen.

I screamed, but I am not crying. There was no tear in my eyes as I screamed, screamed, and screamed.

It was the feeling of someone who discovered that there are something that didn't suppose to exist inside of themselves. Like a worm crawling under my skin, and it was inside my whole body.

I could remember the disgust I felt that day.

I wasn't supposed to be there.

I wasn't supposed to have something inside me.

I hate this! I hate THIS!

The doctors jerked their hands away while I had my panic attack with a bewildered look. But at that point, it was too late. My scream worsened as I squirmed in my mother's lap. When the doctor tried to touch me again, the scream became even louder as my stranger mother tried to hold me in her arm. I never let the doctor touched me again that day. My kicking attempt made the doctor's afford subsided. I did't know what he or she said to my mother and father, but my mother started to shout at them. Her voice shivered as if she was holding her tear. There was only silence from her husband.

Maybe the doctor said something like 'At this rate, she won't survived for another week', or my stranger mother and father wouldn't be so work up.

That day, my anonymous parents seem downright terrified on their return from the doctor. They kept looking at me as if I was going to fade away before their eyes.

My body went limp, but I didn't seem to care.

That night, both of my 'strangers' hovered above me again. As if they never tired of watching me sleep, they stared. Their eyes were downcast. Although they were silent, the strain of tears on mother still noticeable. It was as if they are waiting for something to happen.

Maybe it was to watch me die, life fading away from their child's eyes.

I went to sleep, and fully prepared to sleep—

—for eternity.

"—Pam, hey, Pamela?"

"...Jessy?" I blinked, looking as sleepy at least, or bewildered at best, "Why are you here? I thought I was dead."

I only got an 'are you crazy' glance in return.

Jessica, who was my best friend and coworker, huffed. "What are you mumbling about when we are about to go on our long-awaiting vacation? I mean it, look! You don't have to take care of your brother since he goes on a field trip for a week! You could, at least, try to have fun, will you?"

"...I guess you are right,"

"'I guess'? No, girls. I was always right." And she made an effort to flip her blond hair to prove her point.

I laughed, feeling as refreshed as ever. I was alive. Jessica was here, Nathan was here, and everything was alright.

It was alright.

And that's when everything went downhill.

"I guess we cannot travel with our wallet as flat as a sandwich," Jessica joked and jerked her thumb to the bank.

The bad feeling has returned again, and it started to grow in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to tell Jessica that I didn't want to go, but it was a ridiculous and unreasonable feeling. I had no real reasons, so I just shrugged my shoulder and hope for the best. I still could not help but look around the building.

The moment I started to think that everything was fine, the sound of a gun being fired echoed throughout the building. Everyone froze as they looked for the source of the sound. My inside twisted and turned. My eyes were wide and frighten. It was like a deja vu. I knew this is going to happen, but I couldn't remember. I turned to Jessica, and she was terrified.

It wasn't as if I had return from the dead, but this was a dream.

"Everyone goes down!" The group of men entered our sight as they shout. The silence panic overcame my mind as I saw

Everyone screamed as he shot the gun into the ceiling. Jessica and I flinched, and everyone quickly sits on the ground. I supposed to sit down with Jessica like other people.

Not until someone jerked her by her hair.

"Look who we have here," The robber grinned, his hand still fisted in my friend hair, "One Blondie and one brunette? How lucky!"

"Leave her alone," I grabbed Jessica by the arm and snarled at him. But it wasn't able to intimate anyone, even more with the person who have the gun in their hands.

The robber made a 'tsk' noise and raised his gun.

"Now, now. Don't be so feisty, will you? Look at who got the gun and who's not."

I clenched my jaw at the situation, feeling helpless to rescue my friend. Jessica could not say anything and she was tugged away by one of the robbers. Her arm slipped from my hand. The frustration and anger fueled my mind.

"We got hostage. Let's take the money and go—" That bastard hold Jessica in one hand and gun in another call to his friend, but he was unable to finished when he heard a group of people forcefully entered the place.

"This is the police! Raise your arm!"

I felt the sound of my heartbeat inside my ear as I saw the robber dig his hand into Jessica's hair. Her eyes then turned to me. Frighten, sad, and hopeless were shown inside her eyes. Her mouth, without sound, moved pleadingly.

'Help me' I clench my hand into a fist then did the absolutely worst thing in this situation.

Adrenaline rushed into my vein as I shot from sitting position into a full-out tackle.

Because the robber' attentions were turning to the police, he didn't seem to realize that he was tackled to the floor until it was too late.

My hand quickly pull up Jessica and shouted furiously at her. I wrestled to gain control of the man. "Go! Jess, GO!"

My best friend snapped out of her dazed and immediately ran to take cover.

Just when I turned to take the gun out of his hand, the solid object then hit me in the head. The impact made my head went dizzy. As I tried to grasp the reality, gunshot rung into my ear and I felt something hot went through my chest.

"S-Serve you right!"

The robber shuddered as he crawled away, shaking like a newborn baby. The red substance adorned his face.

It seemed like blood.

I didn't know when my body on the ground, but I failed to care so much for it. I weakly touched the part where I felt the burn, and what I felt like was something oozing out of my body.

When I tried to breathe, I coughed out blood.

—Ah, I was shot.

"PAM!"

I saw Jessica's blurry form then smile.

Take care of Nathan for me, Jessy.

My eye snapped open again. Tears pouring out of my eyes.

The crying tore out of my dried throat, awoken both my mother and my father from their nightmare. When my mother tried to feed me, I gulped up anything for me to survived. A pure happiness shown in their faces, and they laughed and cried at the same time.

I awaken again, but to my new reality.