Orochimaru's GAY Story: On Valentines Day Orochimaru saw all the men having their dates with actual girls. He's tried many times to get a hotty, but he never could because he was just so dang ugly and evil. Besides, who would want to go out with a guy who looks like Micheal Jackson! " Dang! Dang! Dang! Why can't I get a chick like Tsunadae, or even Kurenai! I mean come on! Even if he's old and really perverted, Jirayia can still get girls swarming over him. Even if the swarm of girls are old and as fat as a sumo wrestler!" Orochimaru said. Then Orochimaru decided to get a Bud Light. He chugged it down and felt a little woozy. Of course, he was drunk. Then Orochimaru saw Kabuto coming. "Kiss me you hotty! Yeah, four-eyes over there! You are a fine piece of junk." Orochimaru hollered. "What th-" Kabuto said. " Is Orochimaru really fulfilling my dream! OMG! Cool down Kabuto, cool down." Kabuto thought to himself. Then Kabuto had a smirk on his face. Afterwards, Orochimaru gave Kabuto a big, fat, juicy kiss. Then Sasuke-Kun came over to them. "What's up my pimps?!" Sasuke said. "Hey foxy mama! Want to give me a kiss." Orochimaru said. "WHAT THE FREAK YOU GAY PERVERTED MAN!" Sasuke shouted. "How dare you lick my pickles!?" Then Sasuke ran away but oroachimaru was too fast jumped on Sasuke and made out with him.
Then Sasuke beat him with a blueberry pie pizza. Then Kabuto said " awww too bad."