Warning: I cannot write songfics, also this one is kinda… uh Angsty? Not quite a happy ending… Flashback/Memories are in {…}
Relena fixed the collar of her sank uniform and stared at her image. She quickly raised her hair into its ponytail, tying the ribbon into a bow, and licked her lips. Another meeting, another day of being Vice Foreign Minister.
So this is who I am
And this is all I know,
And I must choose to live,
For all that I can give,
The spark that makes the power grow
She turned away from the mirror and her eyes fall on her bed… She crosses the room and picks up the cursed, blessed bear and studies it, studying as if she focuses hard enough she'll be able to see the person who gave it to her…
"Miss Relena, they're waiting." Noin calls to her and she hugs the bear briefly before replacing it and turns, one hand reaching for the doorknob…
And I will stand for my dream if I can
Symbol of my faith in who I am
But you are my only
A memory comes painfully crashing into her mind and a startled gasp escapes from her lips and her hand drops before touching the knob. "No." She whispers before the memory takes over and she's left in the past.
{Relena ran a hand through her hair and turned away from her dresser, readying for another meeting. One of her long drapes flutters in the wind and she gasps as a person pushes it aside and steps into the room.
"Relena…" Heero's eyes study her face, each gaze like a feathery caress.
She tries to compose herself, "Heero… I never thought you'd come back." Relena turns from him, wanting an escape and feels him step up behind her.
"Relena, I…"
She cuts him off, "Heero… You left me…. And over the years I've slowly gotten over the pain and come to realize something… I should thank you for leaving me." Relena turns facing him and his eyes widen slightly and she smiles to herself. 'I surprised him.'
"Thank me?"
"Yes. You made me realize that I had to focus on peace and stop fooling myself with my idiotic girlish whims. I had to put my crushes behind me."
Pain filled his eyes and she was shocked to see how emotional he'd become over the years. "Crush?"
Relena swallows and turns away from him again, "Just a crush, Heero. Now I must go, maybe later we can talk… A reunion between old friends… or comrades in a sense." She starts to walk away, but a strong hand on her wrist stops her and she's turned back around.
"Relena, I love you."
This time it was her who was surprised. 'I shouldn't be. He's always been blunt and just said what he means…' She forces the tears in her eyes to stay where they are and she lowers her political mask. "But I don't love you, Heero…" She gently removes his hand from her arm and leaves the room…}
And I must follow on the road that lies ahead
And I won't let my heart control my head
But you are my only
And we don't say goodbye
And I know what I've got to be
Relena lets out a strangled cry as the memory leaves her and stands there, stunned. The tears she forced away then come full stop and slide down her face. Relena backs away from the door and falls on her bed, hugging the bear close. "Heero, I do love you… But you waited too long… The people, my job, call for me…"
Immortality
I make my journey through eternity
I keep the memory of you and me inside
Relena never sobs aloud, but lets silent tears stream down her face as she remembers her encounters with the quiet Japanese pilot. Noin comes back and knocks on her door telling her that they're still waiting, but getting impatient. Relena stands, wiping the tears away and powders her face quickly before leaving the room, sparing a backward glance toward the teddy bear.
Fulfill your destiny
Is there within the child
My storm will never end
My fate is on the wind
Relena follows Noin solemnly, allowing herself to be escorted onto the stage and she stands before the podium. She scans the audience and smiles slightly as she sees Quatre standing with Dorothy, a sweet smile on his face, and then Duo who's waving two fingers in the air, the peace sign, while Hilde tries to calm him down.
The king of hearts, the joker's wild
But we don't say goodbye
I'll make them all remember me
"I am glad to be standing here before you, on this eve of peace. I hope that it shall continue to bless us and all future generations." She smiles and continues her speech, eyes traveling across the audience. Blinking as a camera's flash blinds her for a second. Some in the audience whisper and she hears one say 'Queen of the World' and a sad smile replaces the fake one.
Relena feels something and her eyes widen as she feels eyes watching her from above… Slowly she turns her head as clapping starts and spots him, like she did so many years ago. Heero watches her from a high balcony and their eyes meet. 'Relena, say goodbye.' A little voice yells at her persistently, but she ignores it… And Heero sees his love mirrored in her own. A rare smile dances across his lips as he stares down at her, pain and happiness in his eyes.
'Cos I have found a dream that must come true
Every ounce of me must see it through
But you are my only
Her eyes are torn from his as she's escorted off the stage and swarmed by friends, supporters, and reporters. She stares straight ahead, a proud beautiful woman, and walks with a sense of purpose. Relena walks into her room and brushes her hair, knowing he'll be here soon.
"Relena." His voice calls for her and places the brush on her dresser and stands, staring at him. Drinking in every detail of him before she must push him away… "Relena, don't lie to me."
"I won't Heero…" She walks to him, raising one hand to caress his face then she lightly kisses him… The kiss doesn't stay light though as Heero crushes her to him and it turns passionate from both sides. Yet, Relena knows this will be their first… And last kiss.
They break away and she takes one step back, "Heero, I'm sorry… But I can't… A long time ago you left me to find yourself, during that time I also found myself. My life is going down a path that can't include you. As painful as that is, it's the truth… You fought and pushed me away because you had to focus entirely on that… Now I must push you away… I'm sorry."
I'm sorry I don't have a role for love to play
Hand over my heart I'll find my way
I will make them give it to me
Pain lines them both, yet the words are spoken… And they must be… Heero stares at her, then slowly lowers his eyes. This is one mission he cannot succeed in… "I see… I'm sorry I didn't come back sooner… Maybe…"
She shakes her head, "No… It would've been the same. I would've realized it at some point… Heero, I love you… Know that, but this cannot be. Goodb-."
He cuts her off, placing a finger on her lips, "No good-byes, Relena… No good-byes." Heero leans in and kisses her lightly, then turns and walks from the room… Leaving as he came, through her window… Relena walks slowly out onto her balcony and watches as his figure slips out of sight.
Immortality
There is a vision and a fire in me
I keep the memory of you and me inside
And we don't say goodbye
We don't say goodbye
With all my love for you
And what else may we do
We don't say goodbye…
Relena turns and walks back to her room, slowly lowering herself to her bed. She picks up the old teddy bear and hugs it to her, and she stares outside her window.