2003-02-15, 12:53PM EST
Lingomon: what's wrong with you?
DS: Fifty-two games of minesweeper and I've finally won for once…
Lingomon: Don't you have better things to do than this?
DS: *glances behind* Well let's see… I should be doing my Geo presentation work, my oral book report for English, I have to clean out my closet, wash my hair, do my math homework, work on my art project, plus it's that time of month again.
Lingomon: How bout that NightWalker songfic you were supposed to do?
DS: Eh… haven't watched all of NightWalker yet…
Lingomon: So you're going to do this fic instead huh?
DS: Yep, gotta stay on the Savage Garden track for a while…
A/N:
Hallo everyone! Apparently I'm not dead! (Shocking, isn't it?) So, now I bring you my first ever angst fic "Gunning Down Romance". "GDR" was my theme song for Valentine's Day this year, and I figured it suited Taichi just so very well. Originally my idea was to make a song parody called "Gunning Down Friendship" but something stopped me… so instead I'm making a one-sided Taiora! Beware though; there'll be suicide, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, and a bit of non-canon thrown in. Plus T.O.M. seriously, messes up my writing.Disclaimer:
I don't own Digimon, or the song "Gunning Down Romance". Toei International and Savage Garden own them, respectively.Gunning Down Romance
Sitting on the roof of the building he lived in was Yagami Taichi. The day was his birthday. He had just turned 18 years old.
Tai sat there and sighed. Looking out to the far off buildings, he thought to himself *I know I should be happy right now, but I'm not. Does it make a difference anymore?* The wind blew through his hair as he took another swig from the can of beer he was holding.
Love and other moments are just chemical reactions in your
brain
In your brain
And feelings of aggression are the absence of the love drug in
Your veins, in your veins
All around him were needles, garbage, crumpled newspapers, empty cigarette boxes and empty beer cans. On one of the newspapers, the headline on the main page read "Teenage Wolves' Lead singer feels the LOVE connection with past girlfriend again".
Glancing at that page, Tai finished up the remaining beer in the can he was holding in one chug. Crushing the can in one hand, he tossed it into a pile of garbage nearby.
*The one girl I loved… My best friend…*
Tai winced as the memories came flooding back; the Christmas concert, the day when Sora and Matt announced that they were officially going out, the day that Tai's girlfriend broke up with him because she felt that he "didn't care enough for her" (which was technically true, since he had only love Sora in that way).Many of Tai's friends had tried to cheer him up, saying that "there are many more fish in the sea" and that "love isn't everything". In front of them, Tai had acted happy and like nothing had happened to affect him. But actually, Tai was in emotional turmoil.
He had become a drug addict and drank whenever no one else was around. He figured that he could get his mind off of Sora this way; the chemicals would blur out his thoughts.
Instead, they just made it worse. He often dreamt of Sora and he couldn't control his thoughts anymore.
Love come quickly
Because I feel my self-esteem is caving in
It's on the brink
Love come quickly
Because I don't think I can keep this monster in
It's in my skin
Often Matt and Sora would treat him as their "best friend" and invite him along for dates and stuff. He always turned them down saying that he didn't have a girlfriend for a double date. His hatred for the couple grew. He started to avoid them.
*I can't do anything right… I can't even feel happy for my friends… I can't even feel happy on my birthday…*
His vision blurred as his eyes filled with uncontrollable tears. He quickly rubbed them away and grabbed another beer can.He always felt down about himself. Tai became anti-social and never talked to anyone about his emotions and problems. He quit soccer and isolated himself from everyone, including Agumon. He was always afraid that one day his hatred would get the best of him and he'd attack Matt or even worse, his evil thoughts would cause Agumon to digivolve into Skullgreymon. He felt that he himself was a monster worse than Skullgreymon, worse then Myotismon. He didn't want that monster to be shown to anyone; to hurt anyone.
Love and other socially acceptable emotions are morphine
They're morphine
Cleverly concealing primal urges often felt but rarely seen
Rarely seen
*RING!*
"Moshi moshi. Kochira Takenouchi Sora. …oh hey Mimi! What's up?""Sora, don't you remember? It's Tai's birthday today!"
"Huh? Oh yeah! I almost forgot! And I was wondering who that present wrapped up on my desk was for too! Silly me!"
"Sora, what's wrong with you? Tai's your best friend! I can't believe that you almost forgot his birthday!"
"Well, you know… last night Matt and I went to-"
"*sigh* How come I'm not surprised? You're head over heels for him aren't you?"
"Well… you know love does that to people… it's kinda like a drug."
"Yeah well, great… how ironic that you're going out with
friendship, and you almost forgot your best friend's birthday!""Mimi, what's wrong with *you* today? There's no need to be sarcastic all of a sudden! And I figured you'd be the one to understand how I felt!"
"I'm sorry Sora…"
"It's okay, but seriously, why'd you get so flustered all
of a sudden?"
"Well… I heard from Kari that Tai hasn't been
himself lately. And most of us have noticed a significant change in him. He's so
distant nowadays…"
"Change? I haven't noticed it!"
"Really? Almost the rest of us have! Izzy, Joe, Davis, Kari, T.K., Cody… even Yuuki, who's only been here for two months!"
"Well, maybe I'll have a talk with him today at his party. What time is it at again?"
"It's in half an hour… hope you don't forget about by then! I've got to go!"
"Ha ha… very funny. See ya then. Bai."
"Ja!"
Love I beg you
Lift me up into that privileged point of view
The world of two
Love don't leave me
Because I console myself that Hallmark cards are true
I really do
"Sora…" groaned Tai as he placed his head against the cold stone of the wall behind him. The sirens inside his head blared as his eyes blurred up again. This time he didn't even bother wiping the tears away; he just let them run down his stained cheeks.
I'm gunning down romance
It never did a thing for me
But heartache and misery
Ain't nothing but a tragedy
Inside Tai's mind bright lights started to flash around. An image of Sora appeared and stood right in front of him. She smiled and touched his face, a gentle caress wiping away his tears. Then she slowly started to back away.
"No! Sora! Don't leave!" Tai screamed and started. "Matte! I beg of you Sora, don't leave!" He slurred in a mix of English and Japanese as she faded away even more.
"I need you!" Another person appeared farther away from Sora; Matt, smiling and reaching out for the retreating girl. "Sora!!!!"
"No~!" One final yell and both Matt and Sora disappeared. Tai woke up with even more tears running from his eyes.
Love don't leave me
"Wher- Where am I?" Looking around, Tai remembered that he was on the roof of Odaiba heights. He stood up and looked out at the far off buildings again. "Guess I must've dozed off…"
The wind blew up again, and Tai turned around hearing a flap as a piece of paper flew up onto the ledge. The paper stopped right by his hand. He looked at it, and picked it up. It was a birthday card from Catherine, the French digi-destined.
"Happy Birthday!" it said with a picture of the Eiffel tower on the front. Inside, written in Catherine's beautiful handwriting it read "Bon fête Taichi. I wish for you to have a happy birthday. Love, Catherine. P.S. I hope that you'll get a birthday kiss from that girl you were telling me about. Sora, wasn't it?"
Tai closed the card, staring out blankly. Then there was a change on him. Determination filled his face, though it was obvious that he was still not exactly there.
Downstairs, Sora, Mimi, and Yamato had just reached the Yagami house. They rang the doorbell and waited.
The door slowly creaked open and out peeked two brown eyes. The owner of the eyes smiled and opened the rest of the door. "Oh hey you guys! Here for the party?" asked Hikari winking at them.
The three outside made their way in to see that many other digidestined had arrived before them
"Oh c'mon Kari, you know it!" laughed Mimi as she placed the present she was holding on the table.
Sora looked around and trouble filled her eyes. "By the way Kari, where is the birthday boy?"
Kari suddenly looked sadder than before and looked up. "He said he wanted to have some time alone before the party so he went up to the roof."
"Well, we might as well go get him then!" exclaimed Matt, heading for the door. "So, who's coming with?"
Sora, and Mimi moved towards him and so did Kari and T.K. The rest of the people stayed behind.
"We're going to finish 'preparing' the food, kay?" laughed Davis carrying a large bowl of popcorn.
The five, Matt, Sora, Mimi, Kari, and T.K. started going up the stairs. They had five more stories to go, too bad for them that the elevator was broken.
Take these broken wings
I'm going to take these broken wings
And learn to fly
And learn to fly away
Meanwhile, on the roof, Tai was sitting on the ledge with his legs hanging over the outside edge of the building. One false move and he would fall to his death. His eyes were dark and yet, he was alert and was aware of everything around him.
A raven flew by, the messenger of death. Tai was about to go to a better place, somewhere where he could evade his uncontrollable emotions. What he was about to do wasn't cowardly, it was going to be a new beginning.
Tai glanced behind. He could hear his friends charging up the stairs. They had reached the last five steps. The first one going up was Matt then it was Sora right behind him. When she reached out the door, she gasped.
Tai looked up in front of him. The light beckoned to him; the wind blew past again. The five behind him just stared wide-eyed at him. He glanced behind again and looked Sora in the eye. He smiled, a smile that brought tears to the eyes of everyone there.
"Goodbye, Sora." With that one phrase, Tai jumped. Down he fell and he felt like he was flying. An angel came to him and then, it was the end.
And learn to fly away
Still in complete shock, Kari, Matt, T.K. and Mimi just stood there, frozen in place. The only one free was Sora, who broke away and ran to the edge. "No, Tai, Nooooo!!!"
~*I'm gunning down romance*~
In the end, they couldn't find his shattered body on ground below. Perhaps he had really flown away to a better place?
The mini Japanese dictionary (written by a girl who doesn't know Japanese... AT ALL):
Yagami - Taichi's Japanese last name. I wrote it for the heck of it. (I personally like "Kamiya" better, but I kept on thinking "Kamiya Kaoru" so yeah...)
Moshi - Telephone "Hello".
Kochira [insert name here] - I think it's like "It's [insert name here]".
Bai - "Bye." *shrug* That's it.
Ja - It's like "Later.".
Matte - I think it's like "wait!"
Bon fête - 0_o wait a minute... this is French... for "Happy Birthday."
You all should know "Gomen nasai" ... oh, and anyone's who's seen the Gravitation OAV, should know the Yuki thing. (*drool* Yuki Eiri...)
A/N:
Gack! The date: March 1st 2003. The time: 2:24 PM. And now you know how long it took me to complete this. Oh and gomen nasai to any Taichi fans. *bows*Tai:
You should apologize to ME! YOU KILLED ME!DS:
Sorry, Yuki-san, but really, it was either you dying or me dying.Tai:
0__o Did you just call me Mr. Snow?DS:
…yes…Tai:
ANYWAYS…DS:
Review please!