Loss of his sanity

by Lost in the wing of angels

HarryXDraco. another one of those Veela things. Lets just say Harry ends up being tied to Draco and he can't decide to accept or not. While at first it was Draco it was now Harry that is at a loss of his sanity as he can't choose what to do.

1. Chapter 1

Loss of his sanity.

By Luke Daniel.

I Draco Malfoy, am about to go insane. Let me explain this to you as delicately as I can. I was officially about to lose my mind, if my head didn't explode first.

You see, over the summer I had become sixteen and in doing so the veela blood in my veins had kicked in. Thus making me succeptable to whoever was destined to be my mate. Their was only one person that existed for a veela to mate with. And sadly if I didn't get them, I would die.

That's why it sucked when a veela's mate refused them because it meant your life was cut short by something that's out of our control. When my veela blood had first kicked in I hadn't sensed anything but now I was here on the train to Hogwarts and their scent was EVERYWHERE, and it was driving me crazy.

Because of the movement of the train even though you couldn't tell the scent was slowly being pushed everywhere in the train. That's why I had sat at the very back of the train because that would be the last place the,luscious, scent had would drift too. Unfortunately it had drifted faster than I had anticipated and I still had about two hours till we got to hogsmeade.

A boy that looked a little over my age sat next to me. I knew it wasn't him because he was a close friend of my family. I was trying to keep myself from slamming my head against the cart wall when another strong wiff came through the air conditioning tube that was probably connected to my mates cart.

I had three fears. One, it was a boy I could live with that, because I was gonna love them no matter what, but they might not. Two, they didn't really have much of a fancy towards me. Three, they were a griffindor. If any of those three were true then chances are I'd be dead in a year. A veela's love was impossibly loyal. It was the purest love you could ever have. Once we found our mate we would pour so much adoration into them that it was nearly impossible to resist sometimes.

God I hope whoever it is accepts me. Even if they deny me I'd always be kind to them even if I was gonna die. It was how a veela lived if they accepted you, you end up being the perfect person for them. They denied you, your heart is practicly torn apart and you live in depression as long as you can without them.

I turned to the older boy beside me and he turned and locked my gray eyes with his violet ones. "Its driving you insane isn't it?" I just groaned at his voice that was like a purr and fell over banging my head against the wall. Hard.

He chuckled. "Its okay after you find them it won't be as hard anymore, though you will have to refrain from jumping them at first sight or coming on too strong. That's why your father sent me. To try and keep you under control I know how much it must be driving you crazy right now." I nodded while groaning again as the scent gave another spike.

"GOD! Please Jade just let me go look!" he chuckled beside me again. "You know I'm not allowed to do that. We're gonna wait for the welcoming feast then I'll turn you invisible and you can search each table fror them, but no touching! If they feel you touching them not only will it freak them out but they will figure it had been you later on and get freaked out. Also you might end up losing control and going too far."

I groaned and slammed back into my seat groaning periodically. The stupid immortal could be so difficult sometimes. I looked at him. His hair was the darkest black I had ever seen and hung loosely on his head his bangs hanging slightly into his eyes. The ruby color seemed to dig into my soul when we locked eyes and I hated that feeling. His thin but nicely muscled body was being shown through his tight black shirt and the baggy black jeans with chains hanging over it periodically made a wonderful show with his pale skin.

He was an immortal guardian for the malfoy family and had lived for over 300 years with each of the malfoy family era's protecting us from the bigger dangers, though the dark lord didn't count as that was done out of his knowing. I had only seen him actually protecting the family once before in my life. It had been when my mother was angry at my father and she had tried to take it out on me.

Luckily before she had been able to hurt me Jade had appeared in my house. I remember it like it was yesterday.

"NO mother please stop!" I yelled at her as she came at me with her wand drawn planning to use the toture curse on me to take out her anger on me. "No! Its all your fault! We were so much happier when you didn't even exist!" right before she had cast the curse a flurry of black feathers had appeared infront of me and her spell was easily deflected. I looked up to find Jade there infront of me with a clawed hand under her chin holding her in the air his ruby eyes now a brighter red that resembled blood.

"Narcissa, you must learn your priotities. Your son is someone that has made you and your husband proud and happy for many years. Now I am going to sit you down, but for the rest of my or Draco's days I am goin to be his personal guard." He then lowered my mother to the ground as the black feathered wings that jutted from his back lowered down to where they weren't jutting into the air.

"Come Draco lets get you to bed. I must discuss some priorities with you, like how our friendship will exist now with me pledging myself to you for this era."

I sighed at the memory wich had been beginning of a great friendship. Luckily the memory had distracted me from the delectable smell that seemed to be beckoning to me. I could almost hear a voice on the wind that came with the scent. No wait….I can hear a voice. It was a males voice calling me to him.

Well there goes fear one. "It's a male." Jade turned to me at my sudden out burtst. "You hear it then?" I nodded. "His scent is starting to speak to me. Calling me to him. surprisingly instead of making it harder for me it seems easier." He nodded.

"When he's calling to you it means your getting a few moments where his scent will be less strong. But just give it a minute and then his voice will be stronger and the scent will return just as strong. Then it will be even harder because both will be calling to you. Then I will really be needed because your gonna want to go to him so bad it will hurt."

"Just try to go to sleep, if you fall asleep before both senses return then you will have a more peaceful trip. But if you do fall asleep you will have dreams of small glimpses of him whoever it is. It will never grant you a full picture. Probably you'll see his hair color as he turns away from you or the flash of his eyes as he looks through a mask. The mask thing is more common. Chances are when it's a mask vision he'll be naked other from that and well………I think you get whats happening between the two fo you…"

I made a noice but instead of a groan it came out more as a moan of pleasure at the mental image. "Hex me asleep PLEASE?" he frowned in my direction but reached in his pocket and pulled out a small violet bottle. "Lucius gave me this to help you sleep if you needed it." I opened my mouth invitingly and he turned the bottle over pouring it down my throat. I nearly gagged at the foul taste but I wanted to sleep so bad that I was able to resist.

It was less than five seconds before my vision blurred and I was out cold.

I watched Draco quickly nod off after giving him the potion. I smiled at him and twisted his body so he could lay across the seat in the train before moving to the other side of the cart. I wished I had more of the sleeping potion as I knew what was coming next. He was gonna be making noises in his sleep and I didn't want to think about it much less hear it though I doubted there was much I could do. I had to stay to make sure he didn't start sleep walking while searching for his mate.

Oh merlin I wasn't gonna like this part. Well maybe a little…….

I sat there at the edge of a crystal clear lake on white sands that seemed to seap between my toes. I wore a simple cloth pajama bottom under the moonlight looking out over the water. I hummed a simple veela song to myself trying to pull on the veela's singing talent which didn't come easy.

I was finally starting to get the pitch right when I felt a soft hand on my shoulder. I turned to find someone with a mask covering the top of their face while their lips and eyes were uncovered. I looked into those dark emerald eyes trying to remember anyone with those eyes.

I looked over his body to find he was wearing the same clothes as me but his was made of blue soft silk. I barely had a few more seconds before he leaned forward. I was stuck with my lips to his looking into the blue fox mask that extended off the back of his head pointing off into blue ears.

He pulled me closer into his lips and I couldn't help but smile and return the kiss now with a shy soft hand on the back of his neck. He pulled away smiling at me before leaning in and kissing very slightly. As he leaned away again I found myself leaning toward him trying to prolong the kiss as long as possible, before he pulled too far for me to connect anymore. I tried desperately to lean in and kiss him again but found him leaning further away smiling mischieviously.

I finally found the adoration that resided in my love for my mate residing enough for me to speak. "Who are you." He placed a finger to his lips shushing me. When he spoke his voice was magically enhanced so I couldn't find out who he was, probably from the mask. "Lets not spoil the moment with words. Besides right now is just for me and you. Right now…. .no….. .one …..else ….exists." in the last sentence he had leaned closer to me with each word.

Finally he kissed me again finally answering my prayers to all that exists. I could have given my life for another one of those kisses. I placed my other hand on his cheek soflty moving myself over to where I was lying atop him slowly pushing him down into the soft sand. I tasted his wonderful flavor wich was something like choclate frogs and cinnamon.

Now being so close I could narrow out what his scent was. It was a mixture of cinnamon and rain. Sorta like one would smell after flying in the rain on a broom. And also a small twinge of something that smelled like the forest. I ran my hands over his thin form.

He wasn't very muscled but he had a small amount that made him very attractive. The small amount of muscle was just enough to make his stomach muscles visible against his skin, he had small bicep muscles and the rest of his skin was milky pale. All in all…he had me drueling.

I took in the sight of his beautiful torso and licked my lips savoring his cinnamon and choclate flavor. I then leaned back down bringing my lips hard to his. I heard him chuckle at me against my lips and smiled against his lips. Then my mate pulled away and started talking to me again.

"It might be difficult. When you tell me. I might not accept you. But you can't give up. I'm gonna end up hurting your feelings. And I'm sorry for that. Luckily you have friends close to you that will help you. He will set something up with me, making me give you a chance. I can't be positive that I will sway to love you because I cannot see that far but it's a better chance then none."

He leaned down and kissed me one last time before standing up. As he stood he grabbed at his mask and was removing it just as I felt as if I was drifting away. He slowly began to fade until eventually he was no more.

I sat up suddenly in my seat in the car looking across my seat at the sleeping immortal. I was panting and covered in sweat. Then I realized I could now taste him on the wind. Not only hear or smell but when I breathed in my mouth I could taste him as well. Merlin what a taste. It was like the sweetest thing I'd ever tasted before.

I stood suddenly and without thinking I ran out of the cart following my veela instincts pushing me in the direction of my mate. I knew I'd woken up Jade, but I hoped I could go fast enough to find him before Jade could stop me.

I was wrong. With a blur of black feathers he was suddenly infront of me stopping me with a hand on my chest. "Draco you can't find him like this. It will only end badly." Unfortunately I caught the smell the strongest I'd felt it yet and a cart beside me opened and out stepped my worst nightmare.

It was Harry Potter. It was my mate. Harry froze infront of me giving me a death glare. I turned to Jade and said simply. "I'm dead." Then I blacked out last thing I heard was Jade and (surprisingly)Harry yelling my name in conern. Then I fell with a loud thud and I knew nothing after that.

I suddenly took an intake of breath and sat up with a jerk, wich sent a surge of pain through my head. I must of hit it when I fell. I looked to my right and found Jade. Then a hand touched my shoulder from the left and I spun to see Harry. I blushed deep crimson. "H-Harry…" I leaned over into Jades arms though everything in me was telling me to go to Harry.

Harry just gave a weak smile. "Just making sure you were okay. Now I need to go to Ron and Hermione." He turned to leave. "Harry wait!" I covered my mouth as soon as it came out. Then groaned when he turned his beautiful emerald eyes on me. "You've never called me just Harry before………are you alright?"

I blushed again. Damn it am I gonna start blushing every time I see him? "Uhhh…..i'm fine just forget it.." I looked down remembering what the dream had said. It said I was gonna get my feelings hurt. Well they were slightly hurt but mainly because it just HAD to be him didn't it?

Jade looked at me. "Its him isn't it?" I nodded sadly. He nodded. "Okay Harry can you walk with me a second? I need to talk to you." I looked at Jade pleadingly and he just nodded while pulling me to a carriage. He turned to the front of the carriage and seemed to be giving commands to air then he closed the door and put up a ward so strong that I flinched away at first.

I sighed sinking down into the cushion. Then said it again. "I'm dead."

I walked beside the 'Boy who lived'. Tring to figure out how I was gonna do this. I decided to just go out on it. "Harry, my name is Jade. I have been the Malfoy family guardian for many, many years. And I regret to be the one telling you this. You see, in the Malfoy family there happens to be some veela blood. That explains the pale skin and bright hair. Well when veela's reach 16, they must start looking for their mate. They have no choice who the person is and they cannot just switch to someone else."

"Well Draco has been smelling his mate all day and its been driving him crazy. Well he tried to get away from me at one point to go and find him. well I caught up to him and caught him just outside of your car. When you came out the reason he blacked out was because he got the strongest wiff of his mates scent he'd ever had….and well…..he found his mate….you do see what I'm getting at right?"

I looked at his face and apparently he was because it was pale and his eyes looked as if they were a dolls eyes. "Your Draco's mate." Harry looked up at me and shook his head. "That can't be right. And why did he say 'i'm dead'?"

My face darkened. "He said that because he knows you'll reject him as a mate. Because if their mate denies them veela's die. Its impossible for a veela to live if their mate rejects them. If you denied him he'd never say a word of but he'd always be depressed, and eventually you'd stop seeing him all together. Draco would stop eating stop moving stop talking. You'd never know because by the time it happens because no one would know him anymore, but Draco would die of depression."

Harry looked up at me a new emotion on his face. was that really pity? "Harry I know that you'd like nothing more then to deny him. but I beg you for his sake make a deal with me. Give him one month. One month for him to try and build the bond needed and if you feel absolutely nothing for him after a month then you can deny him and I'll take him back to Malfoy manner. You'll never see the two of us again."

Harry looked at me with that emotion again. "You know I can't just plain say no. No matter how much Malfoy troubled me in the past I can't just let him die. Fine I'll give him one month but even then I don't think I could just condem him to death."

I smiled at him. "Harry truthfully with the undying love that veela's give I wouldn't be surprised if you don't want to let go of his hand at the end of the month. I'll make the preparations with Dumbledore when we get to the school, and Harry. Be ready for him to be a bit clingy at first. He'll probably be ecstatic that you didn't flat out deny him. To him you are his sunshine. He will do anything as long as he gets to be with you. I've seen veela's that have been turned into slaves because of their mate. The veela blood should point them to the one person perfect for them. If it picked right Harry then Draco will be like your other half. The two of you should complete each other. Harry, for his sake. Just give him a chance. Now come on I bet he's practicly about to explode in worry. You'll find he's gonna be rather protective of his mate. He can't harm you no matter what, but if anyone else ever tries to touch you in a harmful way or try to steal you from him he is likely to get protective if not violent."

I knew he was just following me reluctantly but he followed none the less. When we got close to the carriage I heard singing in a boys voice though it was still soprano and melodic. When I looked back at harry I saw his head swaying slightly and his eyes closed as he listened to the song. I smiled. Harry was really meant to be Draco's mate if Draco's songs were doing this to him it meant that somewhere in deep not only Draco was feeling the effects of the bonding.

I opened the door and Draco's song immediately ended. I saw Harry suddenly open his eyes and shake his head as if throwing off the effects of the song. I smiled when I saw all the worry on Draco's face melt away when Harry uncomfortably walked into the carriage. A small red headed girl tried to follow him in but I stuck out my claws and waved my hand at her face and she immediately back away as the door closed and I yelled to the thrystals in the front that they could leave.

I felt the carriage suddenly spur into a movement and saw Draco move as if he were gonna do something like reach out to Harry but then stopped himself settling his hands down in his lap. I gave a sideways glance to Harry who looked very uncomfortable and mouthed the words. 'tell him!' he immediately caught in on what I meant.

"Oh uh Malfoy," I could have groaned at the pained look on Draco's face when Harry said his last name alone, "I have agreed to give you a month of trying to build this 'bond' as it is called." Draco's face lit up and he looked over at me and I just smiled and nodded.

"I told him to give you a month and if he didn't have any feelings after that then he could leave if he wanted to." Draco's face darkened again and he looked back down. "Thank you for giving me a chance Harry." He said almost in a dead voice with no emotion.

Harry looked oddly at me and Draco. "What was that about Draco?" I smiled when he'd fixed himself and instead said his first name. Draco looked down even more. "I figure only way I could ever get you to like me after everything I've done is if I do everything you say no matter what." Harry knew that a hard thing that must be for Draco to say as he was usually so proud.

Then harry surprised me. He stood and slid in beside Draco. Wrapping an arm around the boys shoulder. "Never say that. Draco if you do ever get me to like you its not gonna be because you're my slave. Its gonna be because we develop a friendship then –maybe- a relationship."

Draco looked up at Harry in surprise then blushed. "Harry you don't have to touch me if you don't want to I know you just doing it because it makes me feel better. I can smell it in your emotions. I'm so adept to your scent that I can even smell your emotions. I'd rather if you would hold my shoulder because you wanted to, not because you pity or feel sorry for me." Then surprising me even more Harry reached the other arm around and hugged Draco.

I saw Draco tense up suddenly then the effect of his mate took effect again and he loosened up relaxing immediately. I smiled at the sight knowing still that Harry was doing it because he just wanted to comfort Draco. I sighed knowing that building a bond between these two was gonna be difficult.

When Harry let go I saw Draco make another motion like he was gonna reach out again but stopped again. Draco knew Harry's boundaries and was making sure not to press them. I think Harry finally noted Draco's movements meant something and stood to head back to his seat uncomfortable with what he had just noticed.

Draco looked up after him and nearly spoke but stopped himself. Ok this was gonna be much harder than I thought. Harry saw me frown at Draco and turned just in time to see Draco trying to choke out his words and suddenly stopped looking between his seat and Draco in a point of indecision.

Draco answered it for him and placed a hand on his back pushing Harry into the chair on the other side of the carriage away from himself. "Don't want you uncomfortable if you don't have to be." Draco said simply with a friendly smile.

I knew Draco would never make Harry do anything unless it was something better for Harry. He'd always try and be on Harry's good side. As the carriage drifted on in silence Draco eventually started to hum the same song as before. I knew because of his I guess you could call 'heat' he was gonna be singing more often now because his veela powers are coming into effect and his mate will always react to his songs.

As if to prove my point I saw Harry start staring at Draco when he started to form words. When Harry started to stare at Draco dreamily Draco finally looked up at Harry and he stopped singing suddenly, wich made Harry wake up a bit flustered.

"Draco I think I should warn you that every time you sing Harry's going to get drowned out in you songs. That is proof that he really is you mate. Be careful Harry. He can get you to do anything while he has you in the song. Though I'm gonna be there the whole time he's here to try and keep him under control. Sometimes new mature veela's can lose control and they tend to get a bit……physical."

Harry looked over at Draco who looked down in disgust at the thought of himself doing anything remotely like that. Harry looked at me. "How does his song prove anything. Maybe theres just some magic behind it." I looked at Harry with an eyebrow raised. "Do you love it when he sings?" Harry was about to speak when he stopped.

I continued for him. "It makes you want to listen to him for the rest of your life. You see images of anywhere tranquil. A forest or the ocean perhaps?" Harry looked at me in surprise. "A lake. With white soft white sand that goes right between your toes." Draco's head suddenly shot up and he looked at me and Harry.

I nodded smiling. "It was in your dream about him wasn't it? The place he kissed you." Draco gave me a death glare then looked down with a dark blush on his face Harry looked at him questioningly. "Your dream?"

Draco nodded sadly. And I answered for him since I knew if he spoke right now he'd squeak rather loudly. "Veela's have a dream about their mates when their senses get the strongest. When Draco had his dream it was right after he started to hear his mate calling to him. first he can smell you and trust me your scent was driving him crazy. Then he starts to hear you calling him. last his can almost taste your breath when he breaths. The three steps that lead to him finding you. Before he started to taste you on the air I gave him a sleeping potion. That was when he had his dream. He never told me all the details but I bet the lake was where he saw you. You probably had a mask on in the dream. In those dreams the veela atleast kisses the mate if not more……and you know what I mean…..though his dreams will get more vibrant over time." Draco sent me another death glare at mentioning somethine he planned to keep secret from his mate.

Harry looked between the two of us then blushed himself. "I had something like that as a dream as well. Is it normal for me to have it too?" I looked at him with my eyebrow raised. "Not unless the connection the both of you share will be very strong. Though at the moment I doubt it as you are barely speaking." I said bluntly showing them how difficult they both were gonna make this.

Harry looked up at me scowling at the last bit but added. "Yah but you said they just kissed in his dream……well in mine………uh……." I saw Draco look up blushing the same shade red as Harry. I laughed at both of them. "Draco you were apparently transferring your feelings over the bond. Trust me Harry that dream was probably the dream he was hoping for. Though you don't seem to be complaining much about it." Harry turned a dark crimson and stuttered for words. Embarrassing there boys was so easy.

Draco laughed embarrassed at me as he realized that I was right when I said it was the dream he'd probably wanted. "Jade I'd be thankful if you wouldn't say such things like that its really embarrassing."

I chuckled. "Well its my job to get the two fo you together so I figure it best I get the embarrassing news out of the way first. After all with all the stuff I have dug out of Harry's mind I could go on forever." Harry paled even more.

I chuckled. "How I love being psychic." Draco chuckled at Harry paling again. "Now now Draco I can say more on you. Can't I Dray-kins?" Harry laughed out loud and Draco looked down at the floor. "Now now Harry. Lets be nice. Or maybe I should tell about how Ginny tried to make moves on you last year." Now Harry stopped and Draco was laughing.

"The next one to laugh at the other, will have something BIG told." They both quieted down and looked at the other then Draco smiled. "So what about you jadey-wadey, as your mother said. Of course she seemed so weird to be your mom looking your age."

I glared at him darkly. "Ok I earned that one. Now lets get situated the carriage is about to stop." As if on cue the carriage started to slow down to a stop. They both stopped chuckling but now I had lifted the incomfortable air and now they were smiling at each other.

Good I had gotten somewhere. Now I smiled and opened the door removing the ward I had put up. "Come on children." They both scowled at me then laughed at each other. Good I have gotten them on neutral ground so their teaming up on me.

"Oh so now your getting along?" Harry laughed and draped an arm over Draco's shoulder. Draco froze. "Harry please don't do that."Harry looked at his arm then reluctantly pulled away. "Sorry if that made you uncomfortable." Draco chuckled under his breath. "Actually its quite the opposite. It makes me too comfortable. It makes me want to lean into you but I know that you'd just pull away from me."

Harry blinked. He'd been way off. "Draco. I wouldn't pull away. I'd have to get used to it but I wouldn't pull away from you. I don't plan to deny your offer as a mate. Part of it is because I don't want you to go off and die. And another part though I hate to admit it is, I kinda enjoyed the dream."

Draco gaped at him. "I wish I'd gotten that dream. If YOU enjoyed it then it must have been good. I mean you hated me when we first got on the train. I hope it was good." Harry smiled. "It was."

I decided this was the time I should leave to make this conversation more private for the two. "Ok boys I'll be back in a little bit. I am going to go make the preporations with Dumbledore." I walked away quickly not wanting to hear much else about Harry's dream.

Okay now I wanted to know what had happened in the dream I'd wanted to have but Harry got anyway. "So uh….this is embarrassing to ask…….who was on top?" Harry blushed dark red, almost purple. "Well you kinda made ALL the moves. I was still a bit against the idea of me and you for a while before you stopped and said something I'd never though I'd hear from you."

Harry cleared his throat. "You said you were sorry. Sorry for all the things you ever did to me. All the mean things youy said. Then you said sorry for never trying to help me. Then you said………well……"

He looked down but I leaned over so my head was under his and I could still look him in the eyes. "You said you loved me." I blushed and straitened up. "Well uh……..that's kinda what happens for veela's. my bond for you simply means that I would have fallen in love with you eventually. It was just a matter of time."

Harry looked up at me sadly. "I'm sorry for not seeming to work with you. This is gonna take a while to get this to work if it does at all. It just seems to strange, me and you. How do I even know if its you or your Veela blood that likes me?" I frowned. "Harry I will always love you."

I tried to reach for him but he pulled away. I looked down. "Sorry I'm gonna have to practice not trying to get close to you. Its almost like it's a need for me to comfort you. I'm sorry." I scooted a little further away from him. This had gone from a nice conversation to a very uncomfortable moment.

Luckily at that very moment Jade came back. "Okay boys, I've made the preparations with Dumbledore. He's informed the school of why the two of you will be together at almost all times and I am to lead you to your dorm. You've been excused from class for the first month of school, so the bond can begin. He doesn't want to risk pulling the two of you apart."

He looked between me and Harry and seemed to notice the new tension. "Well okay boys……best we leave. Come on lets go to your new room."

Damn it in the few minutes I'd been gone someone had ruined the small bit of connection I'd built between the two. Okay this was going to be a lot harder then I'd come to expect.