"Are you two ever going to stop acting so weird?"
"What?"
"You and Oliver."
Felicity just stared at Diggle. Why did he have to always see /everything/?! "There's nothing weird going on between us," Felicity stated after a moment.
"I'm not the only one who sees it," Diggle told her.
She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as she leaned forward a bit. She was just thankful this conversation wasn't happening around Oliver. She loved John Diggle dearly, but really...well, sometimes she hated the fact that he knew both her and Oliver so well. It made things more difficult.
"Let me guess...Sara?"
"And Roy."
"Seriously, Roy?" Felicity questioned as she turned to look at him, moving her hand from her face.
"I'm serious," Diggle told her completely serious. "I mean, Sara and I have known for longer… Obviously you and Oliver don't want to talk about it, but there's obviously /something/ and you've been practically avoiding him at all costs lately."
"That's not true!" she said and knew she was getting defensive.
Diggle just stared at her. "You're /always/ early and Oliver's always late. There's something wrong when you don't walk in here until he's leaving… You've missed out on all his salmon ladder workouts and I know that you...appreciate...watching him do it."
It was true. She did appreciate Oliver and his workout on the salmon ladder. But then, who didn't? She always felt like Diggle appreciated it too and maybe pondered trying it out himself. She'd seen him eyeing it when it was just the two of them… Of course, they also both really enjoyed watching Sara on the salmon ladder. Felicity still wasn't sure how it seemed possible that both Sara and Oliver seemed to be able to do it for hours...she'd come to think that it was just something that came from boredom on Lian Yu.
"Come on, you know you can tell me anything," Diggle told her.
"Not this," she told him quietly, looking away from him.
"Felicity-"
"It's nothing-"
"Felicity, you're worrying me now."
She sighed and turned to him. "It's really not anything for you to worry about."
"Then tell me. You know I'm here for you."
She knew that she shouldn't have said anything. Felicity turned and looked back at him. "Really, Digg… It's nothing you can do. Oliver and I are-"
"Acting weird."
"Would it make you feel better if I talked to Oliver?"
"Only if it's going to alleviate the weirdness," Diggle replied.
"No promises."
So, she'd stuck around. Normally, she made a quick getaway, but not tonight. Diggle and Sara left together and had practically dragged Roy with them. She supposed that Roy wasn't quite as observant as the others. After all, he hadn't been there as long plus Sara had the advantage of having grown up with Oliver.
"You're still here."
"Apparently…" she said quietly as she spun around in her chair to face him. "You and I need to talk."
"Diggle."
Felicity nodded. "Diggle."
"Did you tell him?"
She shook her head. "And I'm assuming that you didn't…"
"I didn't."
"Apparently we're acting weird."
"You've been avoiding me."
"I-"
"We haven't talked about what happened."
"We already agreed that it was a mistake," Felicity whispered. She had really tried not to think too much about what had happened. Okay, maybe that wasn't the whole truth. She thought about it everyday and multiple times during the day…
Three weeks before she and Oliver had had far too much to drink and emotions had been high...and they'd ended up in bed together. Was it a mistake? Yes. Had it felt wrong? Nothing had felt more right to her. The thing was, they agreed that they couldn't go there...that they couldn't have a relationship. Things were far too complicated between them.
"Maybe it wasn't."
Felicity's mouth dropped open and she just stared at him. "Uh- Um- Well, I- I thought-"
"I told you before that I didn't think it was a good idea to be with someone that I could really care about," Oliver said slowly. "And you said that I deserved better…"
"I said that…" she said even slowly than Oliver and very quietly, still staring at him.
"You did," Oliver told her quickly. "And you were right… It's hard for me to admit that I need someone in my life. Sara had told me that I needed someone to keep the light inside of me… The only reason that I'm the man I am right now… The only reason that the Arrow exists and not the Hood… It's because of you, Felicity…" He reached out and brushed his fingers along her cheek. "Maybe it's not such a crazy idea for us to be together."
She stared at him, her eyes darting back and forth as she took in his face and how absolutely serious he was. She hadn't expected this. She hadn't expected him to come out and say that! She'd expected him to be moody and be okay with her avoiding him or maybe be oblivious to the fact that she'd been avoiding him at all. Felicity was fairly sure that that would have made this much easier.
"I-"
Silence.
Felicity tried again. "I-"
Silence.
This was a lot harder than she had thought it would be. "I don't think we can-"
"What?"
He looked heartbroken and it was obviously not what he'd expected to hear. Of course, Oliver Queen was used to being followed by dozens and dozens of girls at all times who were ready to say 'yes' and drop their clothes for him. The truth was, Felicity hadn't meant to blurt out what she had, but it was what her brain said was best, not her heart. Her heart wanted to grab him, kiss him, and head home.
"I-I don't think we can… Oliver, when we-when we were together that night…"
"It shouldn't have gotten that far."
"No, it shouldn't," she said slowly and realized that this was quite the adult and calm conversation they were having. It was almost too civil. Inside, Felicity was spinning with emotions, but she was trying so hard to keep herself together. "It was too far, too fast...but I don't regret it."
"Neither do I," he replied quickly and moved closer to her.
Felicity got to her feet and took a step towards him. "I'd be lying if I said that I haven't thought about it… That I didn't miss your arms around me," she told him and then looked down towards the ground as blush rose in her cheeks.
"I think about the feel of your lips against mine," he admitted.
Felicity didn't dare look up at him, but she could hear a change in his voice. It was something that she didn't hear too often, it was happiness...but it was something more… She couldn't quite put her finger on the difference, but it was definitely a good extra something.
"The feeling of our bodies pressed together," he went on.
She closed her eyes and looked up at him. Felicity sucked in a breath and then opened them, she stared at him and really didn't want to say what she knew would have to be said. "I want to say that we can be together, but-"
"But what?"
She could tell that he was almost desperate in his voice. The look on his face… Felicity felt horrible. It was like she'd taken hope away from him and then kicked him. She hadn't meant for him to come out and tell her that they should be together! Not now! Oliver really did have the best timing…
"I might be pregnant," she finally came out with it.
He was silent.
She was silent.
Felicity could hear his breathing and tears fell down her cheeks. This wasn't how she wanted to tell him...or anyone else about the possibility of being pregnant. She was fairly sure that everyone else always seemed super excited about it and there was crying and hugging and excitement. She finally looked up and he just looked shocked.
"I don't know what to say," he finally whispered.
"I don't know for sure," Felicity admitted. "I've been exhausted and have had some odd pain here and there and...well, maybe online symptom checkers aren't all they crack up to be. There's still a couple of days until my period's supposed to start." She paused for a moment and felt even guiltier for speaking up. "I was going to take a home test before saying anything, but whenever I got to the aisle with the tests on them...I just couldn't bring myself to buy one. It felt like everyone was looking and they're on the top shelf… I mean, who puts important things like that on the top shelf?"
"Is that why you've been avoiding me?"
"Partly," she admitted.
"Did you think I'd be mad?"
"I thought that things wouldn't be the same…"
Oliver was quiet and nodded. "Since I got back from the island, it's been extremely hard for me to think about getting married or having a family… I'm afraid that I'd put them in danger."
"Well, maybe being broke has its perks," she teased lightly. He smiled and it made things a little easier.
"Whatever happens… We face it together, like always," he told her and reached out to take her hand. He was staring right at her and she knew that he meant it. "You and I can take on anything, Felicity."
"Even a baby?"
"We've had practice with Roy," he teased.
"You two want to be alone or are we going to all go out for breakfast?" Sara asked.
Felicity looked between the others and Oliver. "How about we meet you there?" she offered.
Things had been better the last few days between them, but there was still a tension. No one asked any questions, well Roy started to and then Diggle grabbed his jacket and sort of hauled him in the direction of the stairs. At least Diggle and Sara got it.
"So…"
"So?"
"I'm /not/ pregnant," Felicity told him. "And I can say that I had never been happier to start my period." She tilted her head and then her eyes widened a bit as her hands went out towards him. "Not that us having a baby together would have been bad… It's just… I'm not ready… I don't think /we're/ ready… I mean, I /know/ they say you're /never/ ready, but-"
Oliver laughed. "Felicity...it's okay… I understand."
She relaxed and leaned back in the chair. "So…"
"So?"
"Where does this leave us?"
"Where do you want it to leave us?"
"I really don't know," she admitted. She'd thought about a lot over the last few days and she just didn't know. Felicity's mind sort of drifted off and she wasn't looking right at Oliver anymore. She didn't know how long she'd spaced, but suddenly his lips were on hers. The kiss was short, but it definitely wasn't unwanted.
"Can we try again?" Oliver asked.
"Only if we go slow," she whispered as her eyes fluttered. She was still trying to process the kiss that had just happened.
"And we'll talk to each other?"
"Definitely," Felicity agreed.
Oliver kissed her again. "Good, because I don't plan on disappearing…" He straightened up and then held out a hand to her. She accepted it and he helped her up and out of her chair. He was helping her into her coat a moment later.
Felicity grabbed her purse and they headed towards the stairs. She kept looking over at him. She really was the luckiest woman in the world. "Maybe we should agree on not drinking so much, too…"
His lips turned up and he was practically beaming as he turned to her. "That might be a good idea…"
"And what'll happen will happen on its own."
"Everything does."
The End.