ages 3 (Ste) 4 (Brendan)
'give me that toy!' Ste giggled, gently grabbing hold of the red car in Brendan's hands.
'then you give me that,' Brendan pointed towards the small blue car in Ste's hands.
Ste pouted, then brushed his slight fringe out of his face nodding, 'lots of hair,' he breathed, and Brendan giggled, patting Ste's head.
'lots of nice hair!' Brendan smiled brightly at the blue eyed boy.
'nice?' Ste tilted his head to the side and blushed.
'a lot nice.' Brendan nodded.
'now we switchy cars?' Ste questioned.
Brendan nodded, trading his red car for the blue car.
'vroom,' Ste imitated car sounds while moving his toy gently along the floor.
'beep, beep!' Brendan crashed his car into Ste's lightly.
'aw Bren,' Ste sighed, picking up his car. 'now car is very hurt.'
'oh no!' exclaimed Brendan. 'is it really very hurt?'
Ste nodded and sniffled a little. 'red car has feelings too!'
'sorry, Steven. blue car says sorry?'
Ste nodded. 'say sorry.'
'sorry.' Brendan spoke shyly, and Ste instantly began moving his car again, bumping it into Brendan's.
'now blue car is hurt too.' Ste smiled.
Brendan sighed, and patted Ste's head. 'blue car is strong.'
/
ages 6 (Ste) 7 (Brendan)
'this addition is getting tough.' Ste sighed, as he and Brendan sat down outside for their lunch break at school.
'i can help you.' Brendan bit into his sandwich.
'okay.' Ste nodded and watched Brendan in fascination.
Ste had noticed that Brendan had pretty blue eyes, and very nice black hair. He hadn't let it bother him and thought it was completely normal.
'can we work on some now?' Ste asked, pulling from his lunch box a container of grapes.
'sure.' Brendan smiled. 'ooh! can i have some grapes?'
'course,' Ste passed Brendan the container. 'now can we try some maths?'
Brendan nodded, and pulled out a notebook and pencil from his bag.
'okay Steven.' Brendan felt proud of himself for being able to help Ste. 'here is 4+4.' Brendan scribbled out the numbers four and a plus sign in between them.
'how can i do that?' Ste huffed, pushing his fringe back.
'use your fingers.' Brendan demonstrated, holding up four fingers on each hand. 'now count.'
Ste did. 'one..two..three..' when he reached eight, he smiled. 'four plus four equals eight?'
Brendan nodded, grinning. 'well done, Steven!'
/
ages 10 (Ste) 11 (Brendan)
'we get a school dance next year!' Mitzeee spoke as she, Amy, Justin, Brendan and Ste walked down the hall to music class.
'really?' Amy spoke in excitement.
'yes! i hope Riley will ask me,' Mitzeee blushed.
'Mitzeee has a crush! Mitzeee has a crush!' Justin giggled.
'ooohh! Mitzeee and Riley sitting in a tree! k-i-s-s-i-n-g!' Ste sang.
'guys stop it! stop!' Mitzeee blushed even deeper looking away.
'what's your ship name?' Brendan asked quietly.
'what?' Amy questioned.
'ship name...'
'what's a ship name?' Mitzeee asked, everyone turned to look at Brendan.
'a ship name..i guess because you two like each other it's a ship and we put your names together?' Brendan spoke quietly. 'Chez explained it better.'
Ste discreetly glanced at Brendan and Brendan blushed.
'oh...okay!' Justin smirked. 'maybe miley?'
they all shook their heads.
'how about mitzley?' Amy spoke, and again they all shook their heads.
'how about ritzeee?' Ste added.
'yes! ritzeee it is!' Mitzeee agreed.
when they arrived at music class, Mitzeee, Amy and Justin went in and took their recorders out.
'Steven?' Brendan questioned, watching Ste begin to walk further down the hallway.
'come,' Ste motioned.
Brendan looked into the music class and Justin mouthed, 'i'll cover for you,'
Brendan nodded and ran down the hallway to catch up with Ste.
'where are we going?' Brendan asked Ste, and Ste brought Brendan into the toilets. 'what do you want Steven? we're missing class.' Brendan sighed, leaning against the sink.
'what's our ship name?' Ste asked quietly.
Brendan tilted his head to the side. 'boys are supposed to like girls.'
'it's called gay Bren.'
'gay means happy, Steven.'
'no, it means when two boys like each other..i think,'
Brendan widened his eyes at Ste, he kind of knew what that was but he didn't want Ste to know he knew. 'boys can do that!?'
'yeah, course, Ames told me,' Ste smiled. 'anyways, what's our ship name?'
Brendan opened his mouth to speak then closed it. was Ste gay?
'i don't know..' Brendan shrugged, wanting to seem like he didn't care.
'sten?' Ste chuckled. 'bre or breven?'
'stendan?' Brendan sighed.
'yes i like that one.' Ste grinned.
'but..' Brendan started then shook his head. 'nothing.'
'okay, let's go to music.' Ste kept smiling.
Brendan nodded.
before they left the toilets, Ste brushed his fingers against Brendan's before interlocking them and then letting go as soon as the door opened.
/
ages 11 (Ste) 12 (Brendan)
'Ste do you want to play football with me and the lads at break?' Justin asked Ste who simply shook his head at the offer.
'i think i'd prefer to make flower crowns.' Ste whispered.
Justin frowned. 'they're for girls Ste, you're being gay!' and he ran off to grab a football.
Ste's smile dropped as he trudged outside and sat in the small flower garden. was making flower crowns gay? Amy told him gay is when two boys like each other and that's what he told Brendan but he was still confused with it all and he was pretty sure he was definitely not gay.
Ste pulled out some red and yellow flowers and began to loop them through one another, creating a small crown. he wanted to figure out how to make flower crowns that would last forever instead of one day. Brendan had always told him to try using fake flowers. Brendan also said he'd help Ste one day but today he was off school sick.
'Ste what happened?' Rae, the girl that was in Ste's class looked at him. 'you look sad. did Justin upset you again?'
'hi Rae nice to see you.' Ste giggled. 'i'm fine,' Ste bit his lip. 'maybe not, never mind.'
Rae sat down with Ste. 'nice flower crown. maybe you can make me and Cheryl one? maybe Lynsey and Nancy too?'
Ste nodded. 'okay.' he smiled. 'can i ask you a question?'
'sure you can,'
'is making flower crowns gay?' Ste asked shyly.
'gay? is that what Justin said? well, no it's not and even if it was, it wouldn't matter.'
'you're right.' Ste said, relieved.
'oh my gosh.' Rae looked over to the football field and laughed.
'what is it?'
'look at Riley over there staring at Mitzeee.'
Ste widened his eyes, smirking. 'does he like Mitz?'
Rae nodded. 'yes! Doug told Lynsey who told us.'
'really?' Ste gasped and grinned.
'yup!' Rae nodded.
'i'll be right back,' Ste jumped up to run over to Mitzeee, he had to tell her.
'Mitz!' Ste shouted, wanting to get her attention.
She turned around from talking to her sister Maxine. 'Max said Riley has been looking over at me!' she squealed excitedly.
'yeah he has been!' Ste grinned. 'he likes you, Rae told me.'
Mitzeee opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.
'go talk to him.' Ste encouraged.
'you know what? i will.' Mitzeee walked over to where Riley was stood with his best mate, Doug.
Rae ran over to Ste. 'Riley is going to ask Mitzeee to the dance!' they both beamed happily and made their way closer to Riley and Mitzeee so they could hear.
'hi Riley.' Mitzeee said awkwardly, twirling her curls round her finger.
'hello.' Riley smiled. 'would um-' he stopped. 'would you like to go to the dance with me?'
Mitzeee's eyes widened and I mouthed at her to say yes.
'definitely, Riley." Mitzeee giggled happily.
'okay, that's great, i'll see you then.' Riley sprinted back to the field and the rest of the boys cheered for him.
/
-the dance
Brendan was back at school today, he was starting to feel better.
'Bren, the dance is today.' Ste grinned.
'yeah, why do you think i came back?' Brendan rolled his eyes jokingly.
'Riley asked Mitzeee to the dance.' Ste smiled.
'really? i knew he would.' Brendan chuckled.
'me too.' Ste nodded. 'who did you ask?'
Brendan shrugged. 'all girls are too needy.'
Ste shrugged.
'who did you ask?' Brendan questioned. 'did you ask anyone while i was at home sick?' Brendan tried not to sound worried or even jealous.
'no' Ste paused. 'can i ask Rae?'
Brendan gulped. 'yeah...i guess..if you want to..'
'okay, i will.' Ste ripped a piece of lined paper out his notebook and wrote do you wanna go to the dance with me? x
'no' Brendan bit his lip. 'take away the kiss.'
'fine,' so Ste did, then he threw it across the classroom to Rae's desk.
at break, Ste and Brendan sat together in the flower garden.
'i can help you with flower crowns today if you'd like.' Brendan seemed agitated at the idea but wanted to anyway.
'okay.' Ste nodded, grinning.
Lynsey came over to the two boys with the piece of paper Ste had given to Rae earlier. 'Rae was too afraid to give it to you.' Lynsey handed Ste the paper and ran off.
'open it then' Brendan spoke quickly, wanting it to say no, hoping it would say no.
it said yes.
'yay' Ste squealed.
'have fun' Brendan said quietly.
later at the dance, Riley and Mitzeee were dancing together, Amy and Lee were too.
Brendan smiled at Ste and told him to go to Rae. Brendan sat by himself, noting some other couples. Malachy and Mercedes. Lynsey and Doug. His sister and Nate. Nancy and Darren. Theresa and Joel. He was happy for them all but when he looked over at Rae and Ste, he'd never felt more jealous.
/
ages 13 (Ste) 14 (Brendan)
'i'm so done, oh my god.' Ste mumbled as their teacher continued talking.
Brendan rolled his eyes then raised his hand.
'yes Brendan?' the teacher asked.
'can i go to the toilet please?'
the teacher nodded and Brendan told her Ste needed to go too. the teacher sighed heavily but dismissed them both and they went together.
'thank you.' Ste sighed.
when they got to the toilets, Ste checked his hair in the mirror.
'why you doing that with your fringe?' Brendan shot Ste a confused look.
'i'm going to see my girlfriend after school.' Ste smiled.
Brendan's eyes widened. 'girlfriend?' he asked, uneasy.
'yeah, Rae.' Ste spoke.
'but i thought that was just a one time thing...at the dance a couple of years ago.'
'you thought wrong.'
and Brendan was broken.
/
ages 14 (Ste) 15 (Brendan)
Ste and Rae were still dating despite being at different schools now.
Brendan didn't like it all. he hated that Ste was dating someone, a girl.
'hey, remember that time when you told me what gay was?' Brendan chuckled as he and Ste walked to their english class together.
'yeah.' Ste nodded but instantly dismissed the memory. 'i really miss Rae. i haven't seen her since like last night.'
Brendan sighed heavily. 'you saw her last night?'
'yup, we played on my play station.' Ste grinned.
'we used to play on that.' Brendan sighed.
'things change.' Ste shrugged.
'people don't.' Brendan mumbled.
Ste was gay, and Brendan knew it. Ste just didn't yet.
when english was over, Brendan and Se left for lunch to meet Rae.
'hiya babe,' Ste smiled and hugged Rae but as she tried to kiss Ste, he discreetly dodged her.
Brendan raised his eyebrows and they went into the pizza place. he sat down and waited for Ste and Rae. when the two also sat down, they began to eat their pizza, Brendan glancing up at the couple every now and then.
'why are you watching us mate?' Ste chuckled, his arm draped around Rae's shoulder. Mate..
'i'm not watching you.' Brendan frowned, picking at his food, something he never does.
'you clearly are.' Rae laughed and Brendan wanted to throw her drink all over her.
'whatever.'
/
ages 15 (Ste) 16 (Brendan)
Brendan was taking drugs but Ste did not know about it.
Ste didn't spend much time with Brendan anymore as he was always with Rae. Brendan hated it and he just needed something to make him forget.
Brendan knew he was gay and he had told his sister, Cheryl, who was really supportive. all Brendan had to do now was tell Ste, the other important person in his life.
Brendan walked to Ste's class and nodded towards the exit, mouthing at him to leave class. Ste asked to go to the toilet and he was allowed to leave.
'i have to tell you something.' Brendan spoke, scared.
Ste nodded and Brendan dragged him outside where they sat down together on a bench.
'what is it?' Ste questioned, watching Brendan uneasily. he was noticing Brendan's pretty blue eyes and nice black hair again.
'i've known for a while now, since you told me what it was really but i've been so scared to admit it.' Brendan sighed.
'you can tell me, go on." Ste encouraged.
'i'm gay, Steven.'
Ste chuckled. 'yup, Amy told me that's when two boys like each other and then i told you.' Ste remembers. 'so, you are gay, you like boys?'
'i'm gay.' Brendan nodded his head, surprised at how he's been able to do this.
Ste placed a hand on Brendan's thigh and smiled at him. 'it changes nothing, you know that right? i have no problem with it at all. don't be so worried.'
'okay.' Brendan spoke shakily.
/
ages 16 (Ste) 17 (Brendan)
'god, you're good at this.' Ste said, as Brendan once again beat him at fifa on the play station.
'i always have been.' Brendan smirked.
'okay, one more match.' Ste reset the game.
'you're on Hay!' Brendan grinned.
'watch out Brady.' Bradehh. Ste pulled off his shirt, and Brendan instantly knew he was going to lose as he took in the gangly limbs and golden skin.
they began the game and Brendan licked his lips as he watched Ste's body out of the corner of his eye. Ste won.
'yess!' Ste shouted, dropping his controller onto the sofa and jumping up, raising his arms in the air.
Brendan watched, breathless, as Ste put his shirt back on.
'don't' Brendan mumbled and luckily Ste never heard him.
'we've got to play again soon.' Ste grinned and Brendan nodded.
'yes.' Brendan said, breathing out. 'so like you'll take your shirt off next time too?'
Ste heard but assumed Brendan was joking. 'you want some Ste?'
'yes, of course.' Brendan chuckled.
'sorry, i'm all taken.' Ste smirked, still thinking Brendan was joking.
'by whom?'
'Rae.' Ste winked, and just like that the moment was ruined.
/
ages 17 (Ste) 18 (Brendan)
'where's Bren?' Ste asked around worriedly as they all prepared to graduate. He knew Brendan could be taking drugs right now so he went out to behind the school and caught Brendan smoking weed.
'Bren, this is illegal!' Ste grabbed the blunt out of his mouth.
'so?' Brendan laughed.
'you're so high! Brendan what the fuck?' Ste dropped the blunt to the floor and stood on it.
'Steven!' Brendan groaned.
'what?!' Ste shouted.
'don't you get it? can't you see it?!'
Ste shook his head, confused.
'i'm in love with you, Steven,' Brendan pushed Ste against the wall and pressed his dry lips against Ste's plush, pink, soft ones. 'i have been for years and you never even knew.'
Ste nodded. 'i did.'
/
Rae and Ste remained friends, and Ste and Brendan were finally able to be together.
'we would have never been able to share this hotel room together if our teachers knew we were dating.' Ste giggled, happy that he was with Brendan for the school trip.
'i know,' Brendan nodded. 'i would have found a way to be with you anyways, always.'
Brendan kicked the hotel room door shut and pulled Ste's shirt off before connecting their lips together. 'i want you so much.' Brendan mumbled.
/
ages 25 (Ste) 26 (Brendan)
'oh baby, baby, how was i supposed to know that something wasn't right...' Ste was cut off by Brendan's arms wrapping around his waist and his soft lips pressing against his neck.
Ste pushed Brendan off him and turned to face him, continuing to sing along to the radio. 'when i'm not with you i lose my mind.' he kissed Brendan deeply, pushing him onto the sofa and sitting on top of him.
'the reason i breathe is you.' Ste sang out of tune. 'boy, you got me blinded.'
Brendan chuckled, pushing some stray strands of hair out of his boyfriend's face.
'hit me baby one more time.'
Ste grinded on Brendan and squealed as Brendan flipped them over so he was now on top.
'i love you.' Ste breathed, happy his boyfriend was finally home from work.