Review and let me know what you think J Hope you all enjoy.

Chapter One

He stood in front of the giant Krogan statue, it towered towards the skies. He didn't quite understand why it was here, Korgan were feared and hated now and the statue confirmed their aggressive domineer. He knew he shouldn't be here, they'd be angry at him for leaving the group, but he didn't care.

"This is my favourite one you know." A voice spoke from behind him.

The sudden noise had startled him and he spun round to face the voice, he was greeted by a large pair of bright sapphire eyes, this person was far to close to him. He quickly stumbled backwards, almost tripping over himself. When he heard the giggle he realised it was a girl, around ten or so, standing in front of him, a large grin across her face. She looked fancy, like she was of some importance, golden loose ringlets of hair held back by a white ribbon, her space suit looked clean and top of the line; then he saw the doll she clutched in her right hand; a small stuffed Korgan doll.

"Not much of a talker, huh?" She asked giving him another grin, tilting her head to the side. "That's alright." She added taking steps towards the edge of the lake, staring up at the statue. He stayed silent but joined her in looking up at the Korgan, yep, he still hated it. "This is my favourite statue you know," she started again. "Korgan's fascinate me. They live for, like, ever."

"They do not." He finally managed to find words.

She turned to face him, grin back on her face. "So you do speak!" This seemed to excite her. "I'm Alyssa. Alyssa Rose Shepard." She saluted him respectively.

He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "Kaidan… Kaidan Alenko."

"It's nice to meet another kid." She said in just above a whisper. "I don't get to meet many on my parents' ships."

"You live on ships?"

She nodded her head. "I'm going to have a ship of my very own, one day."

"You sound confident of that."

Her grin returned to her face and she gave him a nod. "There isn't anything else I want more." She rocked back on her heels. "What do you want to do, Kaid?"

He frowned at this question, his life was crumbling around him right now, taken from his home to god knows where and she was asking him what he wanted to do in life? He wanted to yell at her, purely for his own sake, but he couldn't, he simply gave a shrug of his shoulders.

"Alyssa!" A voice bellowed, Alyssa's head dropped and she let loose a sigh. "Come out here now young lady!"

Alyssa looked up at him one last time, her bright eyes staring right into his, smile across her red lips. She quickly closed the distance between them and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. "Good luck." She whispered softly into his ear. "Hope to meet you again."

He wasn't sure how to reply to this strange girl, he hadn't met anyone quite like her before but he was unable to return the hug, confusion clouding his mind from thinking straight. Suddenly he felt Alyssa pulled harshly off him, a man gripping her shoulder, anger clear on his face.

"What have I told you about running off, Alyssa? Now we're behind schedule and your mother is copping it." He yelled at her, never releasing his grip on her shoulder. "You're staying in your quarters when we get back on that ship, young lady."

Kaidan watched him pull her away, she looked upset and this made him uneasy, he didn't like seeing her that way and he wasn't sure why. His eyes slowly made their way down to the ground, the toy she had clung onto so tightly before lay on the ground, he bent down and took it in his grasp; it looked just like a real Krogan. He ran his thumb over its face, finding himself wanting to see her again.

Kaidan's eyes opened and before he did anything else he groaned, rolling to his back, staring up at the dull grey ceiling. That bloody dream again, every night, he'd dream of her. He had tried so hard to move on, the last two years had been hard, too bloody hard. He ran his hand over his face, rubbing each eye as he went before cupping his chin and groaning in frustration once more.

"Dream again?"

He shot upright in an instant, turning towards the voice with a frown on his face. The fast movement made his head pound. "Iris." He grumbled placing each index finger on his temples.

She smirked at him, leaning against the doorframe, arms folded across her chest. "Least it wasn't her death this time." He looked back up towards her, sending a glare but that just caused her to laugh. "Relax, no one else knows. But seriously, Kaid -"

"Don't call me that." He growled, interrupting her.

She pushed herself off the doorframe and unfolded her arms, a sigh escaping her pale lips. "It's been two years, Kaid… an."

"Leave now, solider." Kaidan sighed, pulling a shirt over his head. "I wasn't asking either."

She stopped in front of the small frame that sat on his desk, a photo of him with the crew that saved the Citadel. The great commander Shepard next to him, grin on her face even with the bandages she was covered in. Iris was the only person to work out that Kaidan had more then 'just a fascination' with his commanding officer. She picked up the frame and tilted it to the right, another picture revealed itself; it was just one of Shepard. Golden locks fell down passed her shoulders, her blue eyes shined and bright smile on her red lips against her white skin; Iris scoffed. "Too pretty."

"Put it down, Iris." Kaidan's patience was wearing thin now.

Iris sighed and dropped the frame back onto his desk. "She's dead, Kaidan." She took a hand through her short brown hair and sighed once more. "Move on." And with that she took her exit.

Kaidan pulled his blanket off and threw it at the end of the bed. He got to his feet and made his way towards his desk, reaching out for the frame. He stared down at the picture of Shepard, it was one of the few times she let her hair down and he loved it when she did. He ran his thumb over her lips and sighed, placing the frame back onto his desk and watched the picture change back to the first one.

It just wasn't the same without her.

No matter how much he tried to distract himself or move on, a memory would pull him back to square one. He reached in to the front pocket of his pants and slowly pulled out a small Korgan toy, it had seen better days, far too old now; he had always meant to give it back to her. He couldn't even bare to leave it at her grave.

He had never loved anyone like he'd loved Shepard, he probably never would. He quickly shook his head at that thought and shoved the Korgan toy back into his pocket. Everyone was right, he needed to move on, and she was gone.

"Alenko, Anderson asked to see you." Davidson spoke stopping just next to his door. "I don't know what about though."

Kaidan sighed and turned towards the man that was now in his presence; Davidson saluted and held his position. "At ease." He said. "Any new news, solider?" He walked out of his room and the young man quickly followed after him.

"Hot new Asari working down in Chora's den back at the Citadel." Davidson grinned but quickly cleared his throat when he saw the unchanged face of his superior. "There are rumours flying round that Commander Shepard is alive."

Without even thinking Kaidan turned to face him, slamming him up against the wall. "What?"

Davidson tried to keep calm but the charge around Kaidan's body put him a little off. "Um… Yeah. Couple said they've seen her in Omega but she might be working for Cerberus."

"That's ridicules." Kaidan growled, releasing his grip from the scruff of his shirt. "The Commander Shepard I served hated Cerberus, she'd never join them."

"Sure, it's not the fact she was spaced or anything…" Davidson muttered rolling his shoulders. "I'm just telling you what I've heard…Sir."

"Dismissed." Kaidan grumbled. He gave a flick of his hand to tell him to leave and continued on his way to the Comm. Room. His mind was racing, rumours that she's alive?

Impossible.

He remembered running to where the last pod had been collected by an Alliance ship, so relieved they had survived that attack. But when the door had been pulled open he saw only Joker, holding his dark blue cap in his finger tips, staring down at the ground. He remembered getting down into his face and yelling at him, asking where the hell Alyssa was. Joker finally looked up from the spot on the ground he had been staring at and whispered 'she was spaced…'

Even the thought of that moment made him shiver. He shook his head and entered the Comm. Room, a hologram of Anderson already up and waiting for him. "You wanted me, Sir?" Kaidan asked upon entry.

"We have a lead that Horizon might be the next settlement to be attacked, if my thoughts are correct and it is Cerberus behind these attacks, I want you to be there to stop them." Anderson pointed his index finger towards him. "Feelings aside, Commander."

This made his stomach churn, was she really alive? "Feelings, Sir?"

"I'm sure you've heard by now of the unconfirmed reports of Commander Shepard's return? Although I can not conform or deny these rumours, there is a chance she could be there, leading Cerberus."

"She wouldn't do that!" Kaidan growled but quickly pulled himself back into line. "Sorry Sir."

"These rumours upset me as well, Commander. But if they are true we must not let Cerberus get away with it." Anderson tilted his head in respect. "I know that if anyone could step up to Shepard's shoes, it can be you, Commander."

The link was disconnected and as soon as it was he felt his head drop, he was no where near Commander Shepard's rank, she had this way about her, was always strong when she needed to be but also kind and caring. And if she was working for Cerberus? How could he ever look passed that? They took down that Cerberus lab together, horrified by the cruel things they did.

He growled and left the Comm. Room, feeling a strange mix of emotion, every solider he passed saluted him but he paid no attention to them. Alyssa Rose Shepard was dead. She went down with the Normandy two years ago.

She was dead.

Dead.

Alyssa Shepard stretched out her arms, a pleasing crack sound sounded and a smile came onto her face. She walked down the corridors of the Normandy SR2 with Garrus beside her. "Well, that went well." She commented lolling her head around.

"Tends to always go well when it comes to you, Shepard." Garrus replied glancing over his shoulder at the man that followed a few steps behind him. "I don't like this whole Cerberus thing, Ally."

Shepard turned her head to join him at looking back at Jacob Taylor who took no obvious notice of the two of them looking at him. "Doesn't always go well, Garrus, last time I died." She flashed him a grin, seemingly so calm about the fact she had been dead- dead, for two knew that it just hadn't sunk in yet, he had been by her side through everything since she let him come along with her to chase down Saren. He had grown an attachment to the human and often became very protective of her, regardless of the fact she could break him in less then two seconds. "I really hate how casual you are about everything." He grumbled.

She sent him a small smile. "I can't let stuff get to me Garrus." She sighed and tugged at her tight ponytail which held back her long golden hair before moving on to play with her side fringe. "I've been on ships where the Commanding officer let their nervous and worries surface, even a little… the whole team feels it. Their on edge enough I don't need to add to it." She stopped walking and turned towards Jacob who had noticed her sudden stop.

"Commander?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Has Grunt settled in?" She asked curiously, rocking back on her heels, arms behind her back.

"I believe so, Commander." Jacob answered, serious look never faltering from his face.

She nodded her head. "Thank you Mr. Taylor, you may head back to your post now."

Jacob nodded his head, saluted and when she nodded to the salute he took his leave, Garrus shuttered and ran his talons along his gun. "Creeps me out." Alyssa sent him a grin before the two continued down the corridor, her smile had faded from her face and she seemed to just walk, instead of bound down the corridors. Garrus lightly grabbed onto her arm and forced her to stop once more. "What is it, Ally?"

Shepard took in a deep breathe, her eyes slowly drifting up to the Turians' face. "What…" She frowned turning away with a grunt.

"You want to know what it was like? The last two years?"

"My mind can't get around that, Garrus." She sighed. "For you… Liara… Tali… Joker…"

Garrus saw her pause, eyes staring down at the floor. "Kaidan." She swallowed hard at that but managed to nod her head. "He was a mess at your service… Joker too, he never stopped blaming himself."

"It felt like I went to sleep." Shepard shook her head. "Well… by that I mean it was like I fell asleep and woke up. Being spaced hurt."

"Everyone changed after you died, Commander. We weren't much without you." Garrus sent her an awkward smile which caused her to laugh.

She moved towards the Turian and threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly. Garrus gently wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up so he didn't have to bend over himself to return her hug. It was true he had missed her, missed her greatly. Shepard rested her head on the hard metal of his armour, thoughts still else where, but appreciate of his comforting words.

"Ah, Commander, hate to interrupt this 'hugs and feelings' thing you got going on down there, but you got a call from the Illusive man." Joker's voice filled the ship and that was Garrus queue to quickly place her back onto her feet and take his exit, muttered a 'catch you later, Shepard'.

She glanced around herself until she saw the small cam sitting in the corner of the corridor, she pointed towards it with a frown. "I'll hit you for that." She growled turning back around to head for the Comm. Room.

"Looking forward too it, Commander."

Kaidan paced along the boarder of the colony, an uneventful day and he knew the colonists didn't like the Alliance presence here. He simply did his job and waited for the inevitable attack on it. Iris had given him a few things from his quarters, the frame included which was folded up and in his pocket, right next to the toy, close enough to him so he could feel it. It gave him a sense of comfort to know she was close to him, some how.

"The defence towers still aren't online yet, Commander." A female colonist, whose name he couldn't quite remember, spoke. She followed his foot steps when he moved.

"Their useless, we need them on." He sighed. "Anything else they've blamed on me?" He mused stopping to face her."Don't take it personally; these people just don't trust Alliance." She said softly.

Something caught the corner of his eye, he turned to see something coming from the distance, and he heard a few 'what is that?' from the colonists and reached out for his gun. A swarm of insects flew towards them from the ship as the ship landed beside the colony. "Get everyone somewhere safe, now!" Kaidan yelled pulling the gun from off his back holster and firing towards the bugs, nothing was happening, the bullets did nothing. He heard the colonists scream and try to run but he couldn't turn his body to look, he felt his feet freeze in place, the bugs landing on him, there wasn't anything he could do to stop them.

This wasn't Cerberus.

And he failed these people; he didn't even have a chance.

"This will be your new ship, lieutenant. You'll be under Captain Anderson and Commander Shepard." He simply nodded at the man who led him onto the Normandy.

He knew this was the same Shepard he had met all those years ago, he knew because he saw the report on the Blitz. She was a war hero, a common household name. He followed behind the man, glancing around at this amazing ship he had strolled onto, top of the line, or so they said. He worked hard to get here, to hopefully work for her, and see her saying that in his head made it sound a little creepy.

He was lead into a small room where he could see Captain Anderson in his suit, waiting for him, arms behind his back. The man that had let him in saluted at the Captain before taking his leave.

"Ah, Lieutenant Alenko. We have been waiting for you." His facial expression didn't change but the tone in his voice came across happy. "Commander, you're just in time."Kaidan turned around to face the door, there she stood as pretty as the posters made her out to be, hair up in a tight ponytail, falling into ringlets once allowed, side fringe across the right side of her face, bright eyes staring at him; the prettiest blue. Her armour shined in the light and her weapons matched, hoisted on her back. "Sorry I'm late Sir, one of the crew members asked a question.""That's quite alright, Commander." He replied. "If you'll excuse me I have something's I must do before we leave, Commander I'll leave you to show Lieutenant Alenko around."

Shepard saluted respectfully, Kaidan quickly following her lead. Anderson nodded to both and then made his way out of the room, leaving the two alone. Kaidan knew she wouldn't remember him, a woman such as herself wouldn't have him on her mind at all.

But suddenly she ran towards him and threw her arms around his neck; he stumbled backwards at her sudden weight crashing against him. "Kaidan! I always hoped I'd run into you again." She smiled his lack of reaction made her laugh. "Still not much of a talker, huh?" She asked releasing him from her hug. He rubbed the back of his neck, still unsure of what to say to her. She looked into his eyes and a soft smile crossed her face. "I know we met only briefly, but I was so glad we did." And with that she turned and headed for the door. "I'll show you around, Lieutenant Alenko." She added over her shoulder.

"Mordin, these suits will protect us, right?" Shepard asked sending a side ways glance towards the Salarian.

He turned back towards her, large eyes blinking. "Have to test them against seeker swarms, should be exciting."

"Please tell me he's joking." She turned to look at Garrus, who in return shrugged his shoulders, sniper rifle in his talons.

"Not enough time. Works on single." Mordin replied.

Shepard shook her head and groaned. "Alright, let's be careful then." She nodded at both boys before making hand signals, telling them which way to go.

The mission was a long fight, these guys took some bullets before they fell, they were almost at the defence towers, that was until something caught her attention, two Collectors were pulling a pod along the ground, dragging it towards their ship. One hoisted up an end and that's when Shepard saw it and before her mind could tell her otherwise, she ran towards them, jumping up onto a near by crate and readying her sniper, lining up both shots with quick and effective ease.

"Shepard?" Garrus called out from behind the cover of a crate.

But she didn't listen, as soon as the two Collectors fell she jumped off the crate and ran towards the pod, she didn't see the Collectors to her right, the only thing on her mind was getting to that pod.

"Shepard!" Garrus yelled moving out from his cover to get a better shot at the Collectors.

She turned just in time to see the grenade land at her feet, exploding on impact. She flew backwards into a pillar, her shields beeping furiously. She quickly got back up onto her feet, pulling out her pistol and shooting at the Collectors, using the pillar she had hit as cover, her armour had dented, digging into her back at a funny angle but she was thankful it didn't puncture a hole in her suit. She reloaded her sniper and pulled out from behind cover, lining up her shot with ease and skill before taking them. The two collectors falling to the ground, dead.

"Shit." She muttered, wriggling in her suit uncomfortable but only for a moment before she ran to the side of the pod.

"Shepard?" Garrus tried again, angry clear in his voice.

She pulled her gun back, taking a deep breath before throwing it down onto the pod as hard as she possibly could, smashing the 'window' type area. A strange gas left the pod and Shepard dropped off it coughing violently. Mordin ran to her side and dragged her away from the pod. Garrus carefully moved towards the pod, peering inside it, he bent down quickly and lifted the person out of the pod. His eyes stayed shut, his breathing faint. He dragged him away from the pod before placing him on the ground.

"Alyssa." Garrus turned to look towards her; she was staring at the man he had just laid on the ground. "It's Kaidan." He felt stupid stating the obvious, but he knew she needed to hear these words.

She needed to stop.

She took a deep breath and got back onto her feet, reaching for her ear piece. "Joker, come in."

"I'm here, Commander."

"Send down the emergency shuttle, tell Miranda to come to the ground team, Mordin's coming up."

"Any reason, Commander?"

"…I found Kaidan…"