T'was the night before Christmas, and in Seireitei,
Rukia looked up to the dark sky.

She turned to her partner, and said, 'Ichigo,
It's Christmas time now, why isn't there snow?'

'Wrong time of year, midget,' he said with a snort.
She punched him hard, 'I am not short!'

Yumichika sat nearby, combing his hair,
'I'm getting split ends, damn the warm air!'

Ikkaku was nearby, said he, 'It aint nice,
My scalp's getting sunburnt, and I had to wax twice.'

Said Yamamoto, 'It's hotter when I get violent.'
Jushiro sighed, but wisely stayed silent.

'What can be done,' cried Hitsugaya,
'With no moisture around, I have no power!'

'Let's call a meeting,' said Kyoraku,
So they went to the courtyard to decide what to do.

Mayuri's idea was taken as droll,
'I'll mine tons of ice from the mortal North Pole.'

Nemu replied, her voice low and fawning,
'If we ever did that, it would increase global warming.'

'If I gained a new superpower?' Ichigo tried his luck.
'No,' said Kubo, 't'would make the story suck.'

'I have a plan,' said Kisuke, raising his finger,
'It will create snow, and that snow will linger!'

'Rukia, come with me, I need your face,
The rest of you can go decorate the place.'

So they pulled out the lights and the tinsel and holly,
Then drank Christmas whiskey till they were all jolly.

Then Kyo said, 'We're still missing something, what can it be?'
The others were mystified, till someone shouted, 'A tree!'

Kyoraku continued, 'I have a thrill,
Let's put it on top of Sokyoku hill.'

'We'll need a really big one,' Ichigo decided,
So they trooped all to Rukongai, where the tallest resided.

They found there a redwood, big as a small town,
Ikkaku said, 'Bankai!', and then cut it down.

They sledded it up, and dragged it forward at a crawl.
Kyo sat as the driver, and you could hear him brawl:

'Come Momo, Come Mayuri, Come Ikkaku and Ichigo.
On Hisagi, On Hitsugaya, On Yumichika and Jushiro.

'Through the gates, through the town, up the stairs on the wall.
Now hoist it up, steady it, drop the ropes all.'

In the place of execution, now stood a tree,
A symbol of life where death should be.

'You fools!' cried Yamamoto, in a coat of red brick,
With a white pom-pom hat, like an angry saint Nick.

Renji joined them, 'This could be bad for your health,'
He was dressed in all green, a tattooed Christmas elf.

Then out of the blue, the wind started to blow,
And low and behold, down came the snow.

Rukia came running, with Kisuke in tow,
'Look what I did, hey Ichigo!

'Snow is falling down from the sky,
It's coming from my brand new Bankai!'

And they all danced with joy at the wonderful sight,
Have a very merry Christmas, and to all, a good night.