When The Going Gets Tough
Disclaimer: HP ain't mine. If it was, Ron and Hermione wouldn't end up together.
Chapter 1: In Too Deep
His legs were trembling violently and his skin which had been paler than its usual lately must have lost all of it's colour by now. He was breathing raggedly and he heard some shouting and the sounds of spells being thrown about behind him. His hands which were clammily and desperately clutching onto black robes kept slipping, his pupils were dilated and his eyes were wide from horror.
Draco had never felt such fear before in his whole life.
A part of him wanted to look back at the castle, but the other part was much too afraid. The last few hours had been so surreal. All that he'd shed sweat and blood for was over and done with in less than an hour. All that work couldn't have been just for half an hour of terror. It surely couldn't be!
He felt the sick feeling of repulsion building up in his stomach and felt like retching.
He had just gotten Dumbledore killed. Dumbledore, of all people.
The only one the Dark Lord feared.
Somewhere in the back of his mind he thought that the Dark Lord was unstoppable now. He might as well be declared the victor now. Harry Potter, Wonder Boy was useless without Dumbledore to back him up. When he realized this the world blurred and the sounds became muted as if he had just spun around ten times with woollen earmuffs.
He whimpered, hating the pitiful sound that escaped him and collapsed.
"Damn it!" he cursed his legs.
However, he wasn't alone and a very irritated Snape barked anxiously at him, "Draco, get up. We have no time for this!" He pulled him up, his sallow face was set grim and his skin was pulled tightly over his bones. After all, he had not forgotten about the vow he made to the boy's mother at the beginning of the year. Or about Voldermort's instructions either. Voldermort would have had an inkling by now what had transpired in the castle and Snape could only fear for the worst. He revered the Lord but also had an intense wariness of his Lord's temperament which was just as unpredictable and terrible as… well, who and what else was more terrible and fearsome than Lord Voldermort?
It had been impossible, he knew, from the beginning to properly protect Draco. He cursed his stupidity, and Bellatrix Lestrange. He could not refuse Narcissa's tearful pleads and he was also in his own way quite fond of the boy but Bellatrix had so cuttingly doubted his loyalty to the lord which had caused him to lose his temper and recklessly vow to protect Draco with his life.
"Draco, listen here, now," Snape said quietly and so quickly that Draco could barely catch the words. "I have an idea of what the Dark Lord will do when he hears of what happened before, and I want you to take it in full stride and still be his loyal follower. I need you to alive and okay, so bear with it no matter how much pain it causes you."
"But why do need me alive? What are you going to do?"
Draco didn't know about the unbreakable vow, and Snape had no intention of telling him about it. "I need you to do as I tell you because this is the only thing that I can do to help you."
"But professor–"
"Do not question me. Draco, I just need you to trust me and do as I say!" he pleaded urgently.
"I can't do it! What if he kills me, or mother? No one can help me. He's too powerful! I can't... I can't—"
"Just trust me!" snapped Snape getting annoyed even though he could understand the boy's feelings. "This is the only thing that I can do to help you, so I beg you, don't be picky."
They were still running and ducking the spells that were being shot at them by Potter (he guessed from the voice) and had just reached the top of the hill when Draco finally managed to croak, "Professor, you better not get me killed."
Snape looked down at him, "Of course not."
By now another two Death Eaters had caught up with them – the siblings Amycus and Alecto.
"Snape," gasped Amycus. His fitness was appalling and he was left struggling for air from running from the castle to the boundary between the school and Hogmeade. "The others— they are all—"
Snape cut him off, "Not now! Leave that for the Lord, not me." He thrust Draco into Amycus' arms, "Just take the boy and go! Go, go!"
Amycus nodded and then looked at the terrified Malfoy and leered at him showing his rotting, black teeth, his foul breath mingling into the air, "Congratulations, Malfoy. We pulled me mission off."
His sister cackled repulsively.
Draco sneered as convincingly as he could but said nothing and followed the man disappearing into the night.
"…no of course not, my lord," said Snape silkily, "You have absolutely nothing to worry about."
"Severus, you are my most loyal and competent servant. It would have been very disappointing if you had failed. I didn't expect anything less."
The first time Draco heard the Lord voice he felt chill run down his spine but at that time, it had thrilled him immensly giving an overwhelming sense of his own importance. Now, it had become an object of indescribable terror.
They were outside near a tangle of tall dark trees, a lush forest, reporting to Voldermort after their mission, and it was dark and deathly quiet. There wasn't any movement or sound from any animals or insects. Like all the freshness and vitality had been sapped dry from the place. Even the trees were slightly droopy. It was as if the life here had felt the great evil that had come to this place and fled. Either that or they have been shot with the Avada Kedavra.
Voldermort swooped in a circle around Draco with Nagini wrapped around him hissing viciously at the bowed figure. His voice was raspy and he spoke slowly but even his raspiness could not hide his wild glee, "My, my, little Draco Malfoy. You've done quite well, much better than I anticipated, oh yes, much better than I anticipated. But you did not kill Dumbledore as you were ordered! Very upsetting but of course, I didn't expect you to complete the mission. You know I will not let this pass, Draco. You will be punished as I see fit." His voice was cold.
Draco almost wet his pants from fear and had the urge to run away but the sensible part of his mind kept him in place, reminding himself that that if he did worse consequences would befall him. He would be tracked down and killed, his parents – he only knew that whatever happened to them would be terrible if he ran and also, whatever plan Snape was concocting, and for whatever the purpose he wanted Draco for would most probably be all in vain if he fled.
He had to stay put.
Besides, he was afraid, not stupid.
Voldermort's eyes glinted like rubies. No one dared make a sound and a tense silence followed for Draco.
Voldermort continued on, his voice a tone lower, "You are soft, Malfoy. However, I will take into account that you made it possible to enter Hogwarts grounds undetected. You have had your use. Do you have anything to say to that?"
He shook his head and said quietly, shakily, "No, my Lord. It is the greatest honour to be of use to you. If what I did pleased you, then I would be most humbled to do what you command once more."
Voldermort smiled baring his teeth in a way which only he could, making him appear as if he was ready to attack someone. "Good. Your parent's lives will be spared for now as I am feeling generous." Voldermort then suddenly turned to another Death Eater and advanced on her. "Now, Alecto… what do you have to say?"
The Death Eater stumbled over her words as she began to detail the fate of her other companions. If Voldermort had lips, he would have curled them from displeasure. The report went well though, overall which must have been because they had pulled their most important mission yet off. Nothing too frightening happened and Voldermort left, floating in almost an illusory way, hissing secret words to Nagini, and then disappeared entirely shrouded by the thick trees.
The three of them then, Alecto, Amycus and Snape, lifted their heads hesitantly and looked at each other. Then Snape and the siblings sneered at each other in a self-satisfied way, startling Draco. He could not comprehend how, or why they were smiling, albeit in a frightening kind of smile, but still...
Now the only thing that Draco had to worry about is what Voldermort would do next. Would he ignore him? Send him on more missions? Or would he continue to taunt him further?
Nearby, a cricket chirped.
It was like this for a few months. Draco couldn't go home because the damned Ministry had put up posters of him next to the snarling faces of his Aunt Bellatrix and a bored sneering Nott. He was wanted – dead or alive and he had no intention of being caught by them. He had to be careful of what he did and where he went because now, he was a marked man.
He'd occasionally risk it though, and had Snape apparate with him and then quickly run to the Manor with complex concealing charms placed around them. His mother delighted in their abrupt visits and would always give him a tight hug and kiss. She was worried about him and had become lonely because she could hard see anyone. Any other time, Draco would have been terribly embarrassed and his cheeks would be painted a bright red from humiliation, but now he missed his mother and yearned to see her more often.
Lately he had been learning what it was like to look after another person.
Narcissa had started to talk more openly with her son, her facade of perfect composure had crumbled long ago.
She often smelt sweet, like lollies, and no one but her husband and son knew how addicted she was to candy. She was no longer fit to spoil her child like she used to but whenever he saw her, she still reminded Draco of the times when he would be sitting at the Slytherin table and then their great eagle owl would come by and bring a giant package of sweets from home. It reminded him of a time when he felt safe and happy.
It was cloudy today, and dark as the sun tried to break through the thick clouds. They had come to visit Narcissa again. Snape told Draco that he wouldn't indulge him on any more of his spoiled whims – it was his second time this week – but ended up relenting not wanting to put up with anymore of the boy's bothersome insisting.
Narcissa was ecstatic. She gave her son a crushing hug and turned to Snape speaking without reserve, "Severus, thank you for bringing him here."
He nodded.
Narcissa summoned a stout house elf to bring out some brandy (and a glass of fizzing apple for Draco). They started talking about the usual things and Snape gave her an outline on what the Death Eaters were planning to do next, it wasn't important information.
Then there was a short silence.
Both Narcissa and Draco were not deep people who talked to each other about trivial matters of life or anything like that. They usually both spoke sparingly to one another relying more on actions and indirect words to communicate with the other, and at times like this, Draco hardly knew what to say to her. They hated showing their true feelings and immersed themselves in the comfort of being shallow people.
Snape cleared his throat told her that the both of them were going out for a few days on a task that Voldermort wanted them to do.
Narcissa listened silently but there was pain in her eyes which wanted to break out and start screaming. Instead, she just asked, "Is what the Dark Lord asking you to do dangerous, Draco?"
He hesitated, "No, it isn't," he then twitched in his seat, "It's not dangerous at all!"
But Narcissa, sharp as always — even when distressed — picked up on his lie.
"It is dangerous, isn't it? Don't you lie to me!" She cried indignantly dropping her glass on the table in such a careless manner that the drink spilled all over the able. She sniffed affectedly putting her head down in her hands, "No... not another one! Not another mission! I won't stand for it! Why is he doing this? Wasn't the first time enough? He's already ruined Draco's life. What more does he want!"
Draco panicked. He never knew what to do in these type of situations but Snape was calm and indifferent as he had become accustomed to Narcissa's outbursts. He calmly muttered, "Reparo," letting she glass shards fall back into place and left the spill for the house elf, Storky, to clean up.
Then he said flatly, "Narcissa, what would you do if Draco is killed?"
There was a clatter and Draco turned to Snape, wary, then pure silence. Even Storky, who was waiting outside the door ready just in case her mistress called for her, had stopped tapping her feet.
A strange strangled sound came from Narcissa's throat and she rose towering up over him and glared at him. She flushed similarly to her son in splotches and spoke angrily, "As if you wouldn't know, Severus! How dare you ask me such a thing! The audacity of it! What exactly are you trying to insinuate here?"
Narcissa looked ready to send a few hexes his way and Snape took this as an indication to stand up.
"We've got to leave now, Draco."
Draco nodded then turned to his mother speaking urgently and softly, "Mother, I'll be alright. I'm not a baby anymore! Really. You don't have to worry about me."
Snape then said, a bit more gently than usual, "Narcissa, it just a possibility. I haven't forgotten about that. But I ask you to seriously consider it. I don't believe that you would really know what you would do if your son actually died doing the Dark Lord's bidding. So think about it."
Narcissa sat and turned to the door where the house elf was standing, her voice thick but her head raised high and proud, "Storky, show them out."
They left on their mission the next day, but Draco didn't realize that failure was not an option until he got back and found the Dark Lord terribly livid and waiting at the Manor.
What could have been so important that Voldermort himself decides to show himself at the Malfoy Manor? Gek! Draco's in trouble!
I had trouble choosing a title but hopefully this will be suitable to what I will end up writing... And Deathly Hallows is coming out in about five weeks or so! I'm so excited!! XD
And I based the first bit off the HBP but I was too lazy to write it as it happened.
Well, anyways, I'd love it if you reviewed. It'd make my day! Did you like it? Hate it?
Thank you for reading!
xo
17/06