Jack's Rap
**Third rap ever. Worst rap ever, but…Jack O'Neill gives a quick rap about the experiences he had throughout SG1. Um…good luck following this, because…I'm scared already, and I wrote this, so…religious ones, pray for this piece of ship rap because I'm white and shouldn't be doing this anyway, and by white, I mean 'wonder bread, white trash family in the Bible Belt of Georgia, and no one knows where the fuck I'm from, and…WHITE'. So…sorry, but here it goes:
Hey, I'm Jack O'Neill, and I know you're ready to hear the spill that I'm about to give you, the info about this nympho/ he came on in and started talking shit, and Teal'c he knew the rules, he knew how we should get this fool/ so we went after, set up some dates, try to see if he could relate to that thing inside us, that passion inside our new lo riders, the need to rap, not spread some crap
We gotta rap, and beatbox, quicker than a sly old fox/ like me, I know you see that sly old man with a plan, and maybe a wo-man/ but most of all we get all our dogs to find you, cut off your balls
The first guy on the list is Apothis, then Anubis, both trying their shit/ you'd think they'd learn or maybe try to earn the reputation we'se ditchin on/ but they don't, and now we're here, shooting their asses and callin em queer/ and in the end, we gonna win, gonna send your ass right out of this world with our passion, our hidden sword
We gotta rap, and beatbox, quicker than a sly old fox/ like me, I know you see that sly old man with a plan, and maybe a wo-man/ but most of all we get all out dogs to find you, cut off your balls
The next situation bringing us down were these little things with lots of sound/ they eat shit, like a termite, except they'd eat your whole damn rocket ship, quicker than a duck with a lisp/ replicators, yes they'll copy you, turn you into something new, undistinguishable between the two, them replicators will copy you/ but we'll get them, maybe one day, when they let us get in and play their little game and their many ways/ then we'll kill them, blow them up, make them wish they were him, yes you with the dick, the one who likes to stroke it and blow it, who will go to jail because he sold it…to a man/
But we got passion passion and experience experience and we had to learn to wing it wing it/ cause when you got all this dirt up under your shirt you got to use it, not lose it/ and when you got all this ability, you got to sing, not make too little jokes
We gotta rap, and beatbox, quicker than a sly old fox/ like me, I know you see that sly old man with a plan, and maybe a wo-man/ but most of all we get all out dogs to find you cut off your balls
Now the Ori, we cut them, faster than they could sing their hymns and bullshit, that's all they knew, how to confuse you/ now this shit its over now, like a cloud, it's gone away/ but I'm still here, bored out of my mind with Teal'c and too much wine/ so we'll be here, waiting, hoping that more might be in store, but we know better, and so should you, we know this world could be after you, and we know, like all shows, this shit must come…to…an…end