Warning, rather inappropriate for young readers – Innuendoes (and lots of them...)

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This is a sequel to Summer Lovin' but can be read on it's own, it's basically the opposite :)

Written just for fun because I needed a little break from 'Fireworks', I shall be updating that soon though. Please excuse the lack of plot and cheesy/sleazy chat up lines :)

I own nothing, as the amazing characters are from JK Rowling, and the lines are from the internet. Hope you like it :)

"So Granger, bet I'm never going to hear some of your chat up lines." Draco said slyly.

"Shut up Malfoy, I'm trying to walk here."

"Just because you can't beat me..."

"Hey Malfoy!" Hermione called.

The blonde hid his grin and turned round. "Yes?"

"Do you have an owl? My ex told me to tell him when I found somebody better."

"Erm, I don't have an owl."

Hermione hid her snort and carried on. "How you feeling today?"

"Good?"

"Great, can't wait to feel for myself." She winked at him and walked slightly faster. He stopped dead and shook his head to snap out of it.

He hurried after her, "Sorry can't have that, might catch something."

"What? My burning temperature? You shouldn't have got me so hot then."

"I-I don't think I can catch that, you're just not hot enough?"

"Oh baby, you're hot enough for the both of us."

"I know I am."

Hermione stopped suddenly and span round. "I've got mirrors in my pants, can you see yourself in them?"

Draco's mouth fell open and Hermione grinned triumphantly.

"Ooo, you're thinking naughty things you bad boy, go to my room!" She pointed in any direction and his eyes followed his finger wistfully.

"I erm... would much rather go to your mum's room." Draco stuttered.

"You have such a way with words, I wonder if you're as good with women."

"No, I'm even better – not that you'll find out." It was Draco's turn to wink. Hermione scowled.

Hermione looked quickly around her, she noticed a small rockery. "Okay then, how about we go behind that hard rock and get a little bolder?" She prayed that he understood the boulder/bolder joke.

"I'm bold enough without you." He said, gaining confidence.

"Ah but are you hard enough?"

Draco blushed and lost the confidence.

"You know sweety, my lips won't kiss themselves." She pouted.

"Well you won't be kissing mine..."

"Yeah right." She winked again then raked her eyes over his body, "It's a good job I've got my library card because I'm checking you out."

"Shame I'm in the restricted section then."

"Yeah but baby those sections have doors, and I know how to turn knobs." She blinked innocently up at him, batting her eyelashes. Draco visibly gulped.

"How about I sit in your lap and we talk about the first thing that pops up?" Hermione asked, gesturing to a nearby bench.

"Well that will be short conversation." Draco replied. Hermione tilted her head and looked at him confused, his eyes widened as he realised that he had insulted himself.

"Don't worry baby, I'll make it longer." She promised.

Draco scowled. "How do you like your eggs in the morning? Because you're certainly not getting them fertilised."

"Ooo good, I'm glad we're using protection then."

"Yeah, abstinence is the best way to avoid things." He agreed.

Hermione thought for a second. "Speaking of avoiding things and losing things... I lost my virginity, can I have yours?"

"Too late sunshine, I already gave it to your best friend." He replied.

"Funny... my best friends are male." Hermione smirked. "I'm feeling a little off today, would you like to turn me on?"

"Sorry, I can't even turn on a radio." He replied, quoting her with glee.

She scowled again. "Why would you want a radio? We can make our own sweet music."

"I don't like the song you're singing."

"Oh I'd be doing something with my voice, and it wouldn't be singing."

"Me too, telling you to go away." He said childishly.

"The only things going away will be my clothes."

"Oh good, that means my clothes won't be."

"I wish you were my homework, then I'd be doing you on my desk every night."

Draco retorted, "I think you are my homework because I'm avoiding doing you at all."

"Hey! I just realised, you look like my next boyfriend..."

"Hey! I just realised..." He hesitated, not knowing what he was about to say.

"That I'm the one for you?"

"You wish."

"Oh I know baby, I know."

#

"Who in their right mind would turn her down?" said a watching teenage boy, "She's all over him!"

"Bet he's gay." His friend said.

"So how come he's checking her out every time she looks away?"

His friend shrugged and they both continued to watch the girl in the denim shorts, secretly hoping that she'd give up on the blonde and find them sitting nearby.

#

"Do you want to come to mine for some tea?"

Draco opened his mouth to comeback with a witty retort but stopped short when he realised the simplicity of her chat up line. "What...?"

"Tea? At mine?"

"Erm..."

Hermione grinned happily, "I win."

"Huh?"

"I win. I beat you. I did better than you." She smiled brightly at him.

"Only because you have a dirty mind! I use nice, polite ones!"

Her smile turned devious, "I do what I can to win."

"Come on then."

"Where?"

"Back to yours." He winked and pulled her arm gently.

#

"Okay, maybe he's not gay."

I apologise if this offends you, you don't like it or if there are any mistakes :)