I do not own the Labyrinth.
Rated R for content which, though it be humorous, is decidedly not for children.
Genre: Comedy/romance with a bit of stalker tossed in the mix. It does move from comedy to drama but bounces back again at the very end...
Summary: Jareth needs a new look to his castle so who would he chose besides the promiscuous and free spirited designer, Sarah Hardone?
A/N: This story is a result of watching way too much design shows, may they burn in hell, and mixing that with tacky comedy which is more sex then jokes. The comics may have had something to do with it as well… Technically, this is a one shot though it is a bit long. Enjoy.

Steamin'Designs

Sarah Hardone, formally known as Williams and renowned fashion designer all over the globe. If you have a fashion crisis then she's your gal. Sarah has excellent expertise in flooring, colouring, ornamental displays and decorations. For a small fee, she will willingly travel to all four corners of the globe, help with ideas, organise workers to do the grunt work and also view different and unique houses. She is always looking for something new and exciting to spice up her style. She also almost never said no to short, spicy relationships either.

She was in one now. Well, rather she was in his bed; he was the one currently in her. "Oh, Renaldo! Yes, there. There! Oh, yes!" Sarah Hardone was currently on her back as her very accomplished lover did horribly unspeakable but terribly delightful things to her.

Her legs kicked out and Renaldo grunted with one last thrust. He rolled off her. They lay for a moment to regain their breath and cool down. When his panting died down, Renaldo looked over at Sarah. "Well Ms Hardone, what do you think of my bedroom?"

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Miles beneath the land in another realm, the Goblin King was staring at his wall in contemplation. The grey stone was hideous and all it did was depress the Goblin King and his subjects but for the life of him, Jareth couldn't decide how to make it better.

He had contacted the goblin artist, Da Vinny, but he only suggested hanging a painting of a chicken which he dubbed, 'The Mona Chick'. Jareth had fired him even before hiring him. Silvestre, the only goblin smart enough to wear glasses was humming and hahing beside Jareth. He was writing on a notepad in his nearly illegible handwriting a list of things that needed to be changed in the castle.

Jareth snapped his fingers and Silvestre cleared his throat. "Light fixtures, flooring in the throne room, walls and flooring in the lavatories, tapestries and walls in the main hall as well as in the royal apartments. New furniture in the royal bed chamber; bed coverings, curtains, vases, flooring, walls…"

"Vases?" Jareth interrupted.

Silvestre nodded. "…Vases, flooring…"

"Vases? Silversteen, I don't have vases in there now. Why on earth would I need new ones?"

"Just to brighten things up a bit, sir." He said before continuing, "Flooring, walls, rugs…"

"Stop! There is obviously too much to get done. How, may I ask are we going to accomplish this list?"

Silvestre lowered his notepad with a bit of a scowl. "We'll hire someone of course. The treasury has enough funds in it."

"And the only decorator we have is currently hanging above the bog for trying to place vomit-yellow patterned wallpaper in the throne room. There isn't anyone else." Jareth felt the beginnings of a headache.

"We have to get a designer from Aboveground is all." Silvestre handed a piece of paper from the back of his notepad to the king. Jareth looked over it.

Divine Designers
Patty Patterson- Party Room Specialist
Paige Commando- While You Need Help
Selina Sinclair- Business Expert
Sarah Hardone- Steamin'Designs

Jareth read through the names, pausing at Patty Patterson only because he knew this was who Silvestre wanted because she could design a clutter free concept for the goblins and their parties. Jareth did see the opportunity that presented but Paige Commando also had potential. He folded up the piece of paper and put it in his pocket. "Contact Patty Patterson and Paige Commando. See who is available to discuss ideas with me this week. I don't care what they charge."

He took a crystal out of his pocket and tossed it at the goblin. He yelled, cowing where he stood but it was too late. He elongated and widened until he stood a head shorter then Jareth, with a large belly. Jareth snickered at the disgraced look on his subject's face. "You are now able to attend the meeting with me without alerting them to our status. In their presence, you will call me Jareth or Sir. Never 'your Majesty'." He frowned. "Come to think of it, I don't think I ever heard you call me 'your Majesty' before."

Silvestre started to inch away, "Uh, of course I have. I must go now… people to talk to and places to go, you understand I hope." He ran down the hall, his fat belly jiggling and his lumpy ass swaying.

Jareth sighed and covered his eyes with his hand. "King of the Goblins indeed."

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah compared a pallet of colours with the room and the amount of light it let in. The colour was chosen, it was only the shade that needed to be picked. The owner of the house, a middle aged woman with no husband or children, was seated at the table watching Sarah with hooded eyes. Sarah shivered under the scrutiny. The woman was expecting a miracle and Sarah was doing her best to give it to her.

She set her pallet down beside her customer. "If you choose this colour then you can choose this or this for the flooring." She explained, pointing to the different shades. I would suggest darker here," she indicated a part of the wall, "and lighter over there where the sun doesn't reach. "I know this seems like an overly simple solution with the price you paid and my reputation but I promise you, the simple solutions are always the best."

The woman, Abigail, suddenly smiled. She grabbed Sarah's hand. "Thank you my dear. Thank you. I was told of you by a number of friends and you come highly recommended."

"Thank you Abigail. The workers will start on my plans for your kitchen in two days and I'll be back in a couple of weeks to see how it turned out."

"Where are you going now?"

Sarah stood and stretched. "I'm on a plane to Toronto first thing in the morning, after that, I'm going to spend a few weeks in Europe. I'm touring a few complexes in Italy, and then a family in France would like my input of the furnishings in their house. It should be entertaining."

Abigail laughed. "Oh dear. You should have a television show."

"No way in hell, Abigail, no way. I am much to busy and my life is much too complicated. I have too many lovers in these parts not to become a scandal in the eyes of TV audiences."

"Ah yes. That was the other half of your reputation. How many states have you covered so far?"

"Twenty-seven. I have an appointment in May in Colorado so it should bump up to Twenty-eight."

"To be young again. Well, goodbye and good luck."

Sarah left with a smile on her face.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

"No, no, no! No one will come to see the castle. Patty and Paige won't travel out of their district and I can't get a hold of Selina Sinclair. I haven't tried Sarah Hardone yet but I don't know… I've heard some fishy things about her." Silvestre was telling the king. Jareth was listening without enthusiasm.

He sighed. "What fishy things about Ms. Hardone?"

Silvestre looked left and right. "Well Sir," he whispered. "I heard she was a very good designer but she has other… talents."

Jareth raised a single eyebrow, intrigued. "What other talents, Silverbloom?"

"I've heard women call her a… a Scarlet Woman." Silvestre blushed in his human form. His many chins each going a different shade of red.

Jareth merely smirked. "Is that so?"

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

"Hey Mic, what's hanging?" Sarah spoke into the phone attached to the seat in front of her. She was crossing the Atlantic and, as she usually does, she called her correspondent in her home town. He was an elderly gentleman who didn't travel and didn't leave his home, or rather apartment. Sarah arranged for him to be the stationary part of her own business. Letters and calls went to his address and, for a price; he recorded messages and key elements to tell Sarah at a later date. She then listened to the different projects and the ones which need advise got a letter or email back and she had the pictures of houses wanting to be viewed by her scanned and sent to her laptop. The projects were harder to sift through. There were too many but because she charged airfare as well, it weeded out her prospects considerably.

"Sarah, only one project came through today and I think it would be well worth your efforts." His usually deep voice seemed exceptionally shaky today.

"First things first, Mic. Have you seen a doctor yet?"

"Now, now Ms. Hardone, I don't need any of that from you. I get enough of it from my children."

Sarah rolled her eyes. "Yes, but they want to keep their father around. I just want to keep my business afloat and I can't do that without you."

"Thank you Ms. Hardone. At least I can count on you not coddling me."

"Don't count your chickens before they hatch, Mic. Now about the project. What is it?"

"It's a villa in the central region of England. The owner of the establishment wants to redo all the furnishings and most of the floors and walls."

Sarah thought about it and did a quick calculation. "That's going to cost the owner a mint. I wonder if they realize that."

Mic cleared his throat. "The benefactor said, and I quote 'Money is no object.' They are fully willing to pay anything for your attentions."

"A benefactor is involved? Who is this guy?" Sarah said in wonder after hanging up with Mic. "Who is this guy?"

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth straightened his jacket. "I'm going to be thrilled when all this is done! These clothes just don't cut it."

"You mean they don't cut into your skin with their tightness." Silvestre muttered under his breath.

Jareth, luckily, didn't hear. He was looking at himself in the window reflection, straightening and smoothing his appearance. For some off reason, the chance to meet this Sarah Hardone, the Scarlet Woman, was somewhat nerve wracking.

A knock, quiet and insignificant, drew the two's attention. Jareth said, "Let her in Silvestre."

He did and then stepped aside to let the young woman in. Jareth felt his breath catch. Sarah Hardone was the image of an angel. She was tall and lithe with just enough bust and hips for something to grab on to. Her long hair, a burnished gold with slightly darker roots indicating that it wasn't her natural colouring, was thrown up with bobby pins holding everything together. A small diamond stud graced the side of her nose and matching drops were attached to her ears. She wore a simple tailored pant suit of grey and light blue. Jareth almost felt the need to kneel in her presence. Almost.

"Ms. Hardone, I presume. It is a pleasure." Jareth held out his hand for hers and kissed it lightly.

"The pleasure will be mine, I'm sure." She purred. The lilt of her voice trembled with familiarity but Jareth couldn't place it. "Mr. Gob, I hear you have quite the extensive project for me; however I must warn you that I charge rather higher then my competitors."

He motioned for her to sit and took a seat on the other side of the small table. "And I believe Silvestre here told your dear Mr. Mic that money was of no object. I have the means to pay anything you ask…" he leaned closer. "however you ask it."

Ms. Hardone smiled slowly, showing her teeth. "I may require a down payment."

Jareth leaned back and crossed one leg over the other. "That can be arranged."

Silvestre cleared his throat. "As the benefactor," he shot a look at Jareth, "I suggest you get down to business and cease with this banter. Mr. Gob, if you intend to bed this woman, do so after the plans are done!"

Jareth glowered at the man-goblin silently thinking up a way to get rid of him so he can have his way with the goddess sitting across from him. Nothing, however came to mind without arousing suspicion from the lovely Ms. Hardone. Or perhaps arousing her is what I want to do…

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah had a very hard time indeed keeping her attention on the sketches and original pictures in front of her. All she truly wanted to do was ogle at the divine creature seated across from her. His sports jacket and straight fitted pants sculpted his figure deliciously. His hair was white blond and cut in longer layers that framed his face nearly perfectly. His eyes were mesmerising and piercing all at once. Just by the way he held himself and moved was a clear indication of what kind of lover he would be. Sarah just shivered in anticipation and delight before guiltily turning her attention back to Mr. Gob. It was an odd name, but Sarah had encountered many strange and unusual names.

She looked up to see his eyes on her. They were sparkling with amusement as if he knew what she was thinking. She flashed him a smile.

"Ms. Hardone, what do you think of these patterns? How could we portray- Ms. Hardone? Oh for the love of- will you two stop making eyes at each other!" Silvestre glared at both, one after another. Sarah looked down, suppressing a giggle and feeling like a naughty child. Mr. Gob was glaring right back at his benefactor, looking like he would love nothing more then to toss the fat man's ass in something terribly unpleasant.

"I'm sorry Silvestre but this is boring." Mr. Gob said in that smooth voice of his. "How about I leave you with Ms. Hardone and I will arrange rooms for her use."

Sarah's ears pricked. "My use? Aren't you being just slightly presumptuous sir?" Her tone chilling.

Mr. Gob leaned back. "I am paying you well for your time-."

"I have other clients."

"And I will compensate your lost wages."

Sarah did a quick calculation in her head. "My God! That is close to a hundred thousand dollars, not including my lodgings and the material needed." Sarah sat back flabbergasted. This man was, not to mention insanely sexy, but altogether crazy!

Mr. Gob folded his hands under his chin, flicking one finger at Silvestre. Silvestre took an envelope out of his inner shirt pocket and slid it across the table to her. Sarah's hand shook as she reached to take it. She opened it and looked at the amount written on the cheque. She swallowed and closed the envelope again.

Both men were looking expectantly at her. She nodded slowly. "How long should I tell my assistant this should take?"

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth entered his throne room where every goblin was waiting for him. They were tossing chickens and beer kegs around like pennies. He slammed the doors behind him, causing instantaneous silence. He walked to his throne, his steps echoing in the now silent room. He took a seat and surveyed his subjects. They all stared back at him, a few were even strangling a chicken in their attempt for quiet.

Jareth cleared his throat. "You are all banished from the Castle until further notice. I expect you to clear out within the next hour. GET LOST!"

The goblins all scurried and stumbled over each other in their hurry to get out of sight. Jareth laughed quietly to himself and lounged in his chair, throwing a leg over the arm.

"My dear Ms. Hardone, you give me a hard on." He sung softly to himself.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah was pacing the street outside the hotel where the meeting took place. She was arguing with Mic. She was trying to get him to tell her that it was impossible to drop her other projects and focus on one single project and Mic was telling her that it was a good deal and they could refund the down payments to those people who paid.

"But my time will be monopolized for a good six weeks to get this job done. You haven't seen him! He just oozes charisma. I don't think I would survive six weeks in his company!"

"Ah, so the truth comes out. Sarah, may I speak candidly?"

"You know you can Mic. I value your opinion more then anyone else's." Sarah thought briefly of Karen and her father whom she became estranged to after she graduated from high school.

"Then, my dear, if you do this one project then you can go on a much needed holiday. With that beautiful amount on that cheque in your hand, I would say six weeks of physical exertion is well worth it. Enjoy the pleasure my dear."

"You know Mic, some of the things you say sound so wrong and twisted, considering that I'm younger then your youngest child!"

"By only a few months. Lucy just turned thirty last month."

"Ah, right. Anyway Mic, go see the doctor like I'm paying you to. I have to go back in to see my new employers."

She shut the phone and went back inside to the tiny conference room. Silvestre was alone. "Mr. Gob is just making arrangements at his home to ready some rooms for you. We must not tarnish English hospitality."

"Silvestre, English hospitality can not become any more tarnished where I am concerned. I'm afraid I evaluated one too many homes here." Sarah took her seat to wait for Mr. Gob. "A private room is more then I received in a long while."

A few moments later, Mr. Gob entered the room and smiled when he saw Sarah. "Everything is arranged, my dear. Please except our hospitality and travel in our vehicle."

"Today? Now? Alright then. Let's go."

Sarah lead the way to the door and as she left she heard, "Sir, are you sure everything is arranged? What of the…"

"It's taken care of Silvertone. Don't question me…"

Something in that statement struck a cord in Sarah but she could only shrug it off. Dreams from ages past don't matter.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

The drive was long and the road curvy. Sarah was alone in the back seat of the Mercedes. Apparently Silvestre didn't trust Mr. Gob to keep her company as he tried to. It's not like she could really blame him. The crisp leather seats would not have stayed crisp before too long. That man had too much… essence to him.

So, without the male companionship Sarah fell asleep. She didn't know how long she slept, only that her eyes were bleary and her neck stiff from how she fell asleep. The tinted windows were dark and they pulled up to an old large mansion better described as a castle.

Sarah's mouth fell open at the immensity of it and a similarity that singed her memory. It was a large, stone, ancient, castle better suited to Dracula then a man such as Mr. Gob.

Said man was looking back at her and laughed. "Yes, it's real and you are more then welcome to explore most areas. I will show you the off limit rooms and explain the reasons for being off limit but everywhere else you have free reign."

"My God. You live here? By yourself?" Wouldn't he get lonely?

"Yes, I live here but hardly by myself. Silvestre here dwells inside and as do a number of others whom are away at this time. Please, let us enter."

Sarah was feeling very giddy, she just couldn't stay still. Everything- from out to in- was even better then anything she could have imagined. The walls were stone, yes, but also ancient. An antique. Sarah couldn't figure out why on earth someone would want to destroy such art.

She immersed herself in her design classes from graduate school. "This layout is fourteenth century but this foundation," she moved her hand over the slightly discoloured stone outline just off the floor. "These designs here indicate that it may go back as far as the twelfth of even eleventh century."

Mr Gob looked on in amusement and Sarah had to look back at him. "Do you find something funny?"

"Not specifically. You know your structures on castles do you?"

Sarah lifted her chin slightly. "I do my best, Mr. Gob." She grinned suddenly. "I also know my colours and material and their meanings. Your shirt, grey, means that you are slightly insecure and would rather blend into the background. The silk means nothing more then that you are rich with perhaps sensitive skin."

Mr Gob raised his head to mimic her. "Well played. There is no doubt you have a good eye. Please, let me show you the rest."

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth placed his hand on her lower back, leading her through the castle, pointing out things he would like to change. Ms. Hardone was like a child in a candy store, nearly bouncing on the tips of her toes. A number of times she showed a desire to argue that things should stay the way they are but Jareth just smiled without explaining her reasons. Should he tell this strange woman that her was rather wrong on the dates of the foundations? The castle was built well before the eleventh century and it was only one of the few mortals who crossed the veil and stole his designs that gave it the appearance of being of that age. He didn't. He just watched the beautiful designer go through room to room, spewing ideas. He didn't want to wait any longer for her other specialty.

They came across a high arched doorway with a curtain covering, hiding the room from view. It was his puzzle room; his very own design that was stolen and published by M.C Escher. Jareth stopped Ms. Hardone before she could enter.

"This is one of the rooms in which you may not enter. It is very easy to become lost in there and I do not wish for you to be hurt. This way please."

Next was a high doorway with large imposing wooden doors painted red. It led to the throne room. "This is the other room you may not enter. The reasons are more personal, I hope you understand."

Ms. Hardone smiled. "Of course." She said.

The rest of the tour was uneventful and they discussed where and how to start. Soon Ms. Hardone was yawning and Jareth was forcefully brought back to the present. He looked at the analogue clock he purchased while in the Above. It was unfamiliar in its twelve hours but it would not do to shock Ms. Hardone. "I believe it is now time for the evening meal. Please join me."

They ate dinner and Jareth showed the young woman to her room. She stood with her back to the door and he leered down at her, leaning an arm just above her head.

"You have a beautiful home and I think I will enjoy this project." Her voice was weary but her eyes were hungry as they roamed up and down her body.

"You are welcome to spend the night in my bed." Jareth invited and he saw temptation flash across her eyes.

She opened her mouth to reply but a yawn escaped. She smiled a bit guiltily. "I think I will sleep in my own bed tonight. I'm afraid I may just fall asleep." She yawned again.

Jareth chuckled. "Good night then Ms. Hardone." He bent down to kiss her, lips feather light then harder and more urgent. Ms. Hardone gasped and Jareth took advantage, pressing her against the door. He sighed inwardly. Nothing was better then a quick tryst with a mortal woman. Their reactions were much more genuine and intense. For example, Ms. Hardone was mewing and panting into his kiss, moving her hips very gently against his. If he pushed it, he would no doubt spend the night in her bed. However, she was tired and if she were well rested it would be much more satisfying. He pulled away.

"Until tomorrow, my dear."

"Good night, Mr. Gob." Ms. Hardone called out as he turned to walk slowly to his own room. Jareth could hear the door open then close softly behind her.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah woke late the next morning. Immediately after opening her eyes she went to the ancient wooden desk where she spread out some plans. She consulted them for a moment, absently wishing for coffee. She, of course, got her wish.

A knock on the door indicated that someone knew she was awake. Sarah was half expecting some kind of servant, perhaps an ageing, motherly maid or a young woman being trained in the service.

She was not expecting Mr. Gob himself holding a tray with a steaming pot of coffee as well as a covered dish. Sarah opened the door wider and welcomed him in instantly, smiling.

"Good morning." He said. "I thought you might appreciate some breakfast with some coffee."

"Oh I would! Thank you. Good morning." Sarah hurried over to the desk and cleared a spot for the tray. Mr. Gob placed it in said spot and poured a cup for Sarah then for himself. He motioned for her to sit in the chair and he took a place on the bed.

Sarah tried not to think too much about him in that bed with her… on top of her… rolling, moving, thrusting…

She shook her head, blushing slightly when Mr. Gob smirked, obviously catching on to her heated stare.

Mr. Gob reached over and plucked on of the design plans from her pile. He smiled suddenly. "I like this! Just a little marble and the entire front entrance is transformed. Wonderful! Ms. Hardone, I believe we will be good for each other!"

Sarah felt her face flair in intense flame. "Uh, yes. I think we might be compatible."

Mr. Gob boomed in laughter. "Ah, you precious thing, yes, if last night's kiss is any indication then yes, we will be quite compatible."

Something he said then, lurking behind the pleasurable memory of that knee watering kiss, pulled more intensely. The way he caressed the word 'precious' chilled her to the bone. However, that feeling was gone just as quickly. Fresh eggs with a dish of mouth watering fruit. Her attention was adequately shifted.

They ate in peace, Mr. Gob looking over her sketches and plans. Sarah was about to pull out samples and different companies she dealt with but Mr. Gob shook his head.

"I have workers here who can supply any material you need. I also have the man power so they can install whatever needs to be installed."

Sarah raised her eyebrows. Was this guy a dealer of some kind? Sexy as hell but if he were a criminal, could she really work for him?

Mr. Gob was oblivious. Sarah dug into her brief case holding the contact numbers and grabbed her cell phone. "If you excuse me, Mr. Gob. I have to make a quick call to Mic, my assistant." She left the room quickly, forgetting that she was still clothed in the flannel PJs that she wore.

Pulling out her cell phone, she searched through the contact names and called Mic.

Beep beep beep.

There was no service.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Mic was just slightly worried. He left a number of messages on his employer's cell phone but so far there was no response. He received a call from a branch of the Swiss Bank saying that a cheque was bounced because the name and account numbers were wrong. He tried to contact Sarah so she could talk with Mr. Gob but with no answer, he had no choice but to find any and all information on this new client. He looked up the name Garrett Gob and as far as he could tell, the man didn't exist.

He called the police next who gave him the number for a lieutenant in Amesbury. The officer, Lieutenant Parker, said the address given to Mic led to a rundown castle in the middle of no where.

Ms. Sarah Hardone had been declared kidnapped by an unidentifiable male in his late thirties. With no ransom demand, she was thought to be dead. This was three months ago.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah had a very bad feeling, one that seemed to come and go at very odd times. When she was in the company of Mr. Gob, all she felt was desire and a need to touch him, smell him… stroke him…

But when she was alone, measuring the bricks or comparing colours, an aching dread made itself known. Sarah was getting worried.

It was the second week with no other physical contact between client and designer then the kiss that first night. They were eating dinner in a small room with Silvestre, the fat benefactor who did all the work. Mr. Gob was controlling the wine bottle. After a meal of potato salad, Silvestre hurried away to order work for the project. The plans were all laid out.

Sarah was finishing her glass of wine and would have like some more but Mr. Gob refused.

"One could say that you want me drunk, Ms. Hardone."

Sarah smiled. "Perhaps that is one's goal."

Mr. Gob grinned wolfishly. "One would like to participate in that goal, my dear."

Desire washed through her, erasing all thoughts of earlier doubts. "Oh my." She whispered. She squeezed her thighs together slightly, a flush spreading throughout her body. "Oh, Mr. Gob. The designs are finished and the grunt work needs to be taken care of."

He leaned back, enjoying her discomfort. "I would like to help with the grunting, of course."

Sarah's eyes widened. "Please," was all she could say.

Mr. Gob looked at her calculatingly and nodded. He stood and held out his hand. "I believe we waited long enough, haven't we?"

It was her turn to nod. "I have never waited so long."

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth looked at the woman who seemed about ready to fly apart at the seams in her need. He was partly amused and partly aroused.

Truth to tell, he wasn't sure if he wanted to bed the designer. Something about her always told him that it would be a very bad idea so listening to his gut feelings for once, he kept his distance from the tasty little morsel when he felt things would get out of hand. This evening, however, Ms. Hardone reacted to his usual innuendos almost immediately before Jareth could head off the conversation and escape.

Even now, as he led the only too willing woman to his chambers, did he feel the unease that went with her presence. It was unnerving but the angel attached to his hand didn't seem to mind in the slightest.

He sent Silvestre to the Aboveground a couple of days ago to pick up any messages for Ms. Hardone, instead he found a very large missing persons report for the famous designer, Ms. Sarah Williams Hardone. That name made him even more uncomfortable but he couldn't remember for the life of him. He felt guilty for not realizing that time changes differently in the Underground then the Above. Now he had a woman on his hands who was believed to be dead. It's a good thing her cell doesn't have service down here…

They made it to the door and Jareth opened it. Ms. Hardone suddenly pushed him through and jumped on him, attacking his mouth and nearly ripping his shirt in the process. Jareth pried her arms off from around his neck and tossed her on the bed. She squealed.

"My dear, have you ever heard of 'slow and sweet'?" Jareth said with a laugh in his voice.

Ms. Hardone growled at him. "I've heard of 'fast and fantastic'; hard enough for very pleasant memories which help for round two."

Jareth felt that right now, he would have no difficulties with round two. He unbuttoned his shirt, his eyes locked on her face, watching as she viewed him. She slowly licked her lips and Jareth wondered if there would be a round three…

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah watched mesmerized as he slowly striped for her. Just a peak of his pale chest at first as button by button is undone. Then he pulled one sleeve, exposing the right side of his torso. His well toned muscles shifted and bulged as he brought is right hand over to his left sleeve and pulled, dropping the silky shirt in a heap on the floor. Sarah spent a second wishing that he would have tossed the material to her. She tensed, stretching her lower back and rotating her hips in need.

Mr. Gob chuckled, obviously aware of the effect he was having on her. Sarah just groaned in embarrassment but it came out as a moan instead. Mr. Gob had started on the button and zipper of his pants. She couldn't take it; she just closed her eyes and leaned back letting the delicious feelings wash over her. The bed decompressed and she shivered. Sarah sat up and opened her eyes, looking into a perfectly mismatched pair. A twinge of something that wasn't desire stilled her breath. Something wasn't right…

His hands found the bottom of her sweater and pulled up. She had no choice but to raise her arms and let her skin become exposed. Her skirt was next, sliding down her legs. Sarah refused to take her eyes from his, his glorious eyes, his familiar eyes…

His face was serious when he reached behind her back with one hand and undid her push up bra, letting her breasts fall free. She snapped out of her musing and began to pay attention to Mr. Gob. She giggled when he pulled on one nipple, slapping his hand away.

"Not like that. Like this…" she demonstrated on her own body what she wanted and he copied.

This learning curve continued until they moved in sync together; a leg wrapped around a hip, arms tangled together around bodies, hands pulling through hair and lips- lips everywhere to cause such sensations. The moment of climax and Sarah cried out, "Mr. Gob! Oh god!"

Mr. Gob grunted as his hips drove down, driving deeper in her. "Ja-reth. My name, scream my name!"

Sarah let loose, crying out the name with abandon and panting as her heart raced on. Mr. Gob pulled back and drove once more deep into her and released, groaning unintelligibly.

Sarah, her inner muscles still fluttering and clenching, felt her eyes drag shut, unable to stay awake anymore. Mr. Gob- Jareth Gob- chuckled. His lips landed on her hair, then pulled slightly at her earlobe. He whispered, "Sleep, there is more time tomorrow. Sleep, love."

She tried to deny her need for rest but her body had other ideas in its relaxed state. She vaguely tried to remember the last time an orgasm actually lulled her to sleep. She fell into blackness before she could remember.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth watched his little angel sleep. The Scarlet Woman. He smiled as he watched her eyelids flutter and shift in her dream state. He wished avidly and ironically that he could see into her dreams. He fell back and let his not cooled but sticky body relax into a meditative state.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah dreamed:

Even if you can reach the centre, you'll never get out again…

Take heed and go no farther…

My Lady?

Things aren't always what they seem…

And this door leads to certain death…

You little cheat! You nasty little cheat…

Friend…

How you've turned my world you precious thing…

Jareth…

Jareth…

JARETH!

She sat up straight, grasping for air and looking wildly around. First, she saw the tacky bed hangings and tapestries lining the walls as her eyes moved spastically left and right. They fell down, to the pale arm draped over her waist, covering her most private area from her view. Her eyes rolled like a fearful steed and she struggled to get out from that pale arm lacking any type of hair at all.

Jareth Gob, Jareth Gob… Jareth Goblin King!

Sarah was back.

Her squirming succeeded in waking the dreaded man from his sleep. His arm, now lower down holding to her thighs, tightened itself suddenly and she looked down, following it up to where it connected to shoulder, torso, neck and finally, finally face. He was frowning at her with no more a malevolent expression then that. Sarah jerked forcefully away, pulling the blankets tangled beneath them with her and falling in a heap on the floor.

She waited, wrapping the blankets and sheets around her until she was cocooned within them. She held her breath in fear, trying to slow her overexcited heart.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth looked at the spot where a warm body used to be and resisted the urge to scratch his head. Instead, he put on a sexy smirk, one he practised in the mirror until it was perfect and leaned over the edge, looking at the tussled head of blond with dark roots. "Is this the customary way you wake my dear?"

She flinched violently and ducked down even farther. Sounds like sobbing drifted from her covered face. Jareth frowned deeper, in his experience it wasn't supposed to be like this. He slipped off the bed, mindless of his nakedness and pulled the blanket apart to reveal her face.

It was a picture of pure terror. He sighed and tried again, "Mr. Hardone, what has happened? Are you hurt?"

She flinched away from him. "Don't touch me! Leave me along Goblin King." She spat the last words like poison and Jareth drew back.

Goblin King? How on earth… "My dear, I think you might be mistaken…"

Her head snapped up and her eyes flashed. "Don't even think of fooling me, Jareth. It might have been fifteen years and we've both changed but you can't fool me!"

Jareth froze in surprise. Fifteen years? Was she talking about… Suddenly the missing person's report and the unease about her made sense. "Sarah-" he cleared his throat. "You are Sarah Williams?"

She straightened out suddenly in anger. "Don't even thinking of telling me you didn't know! You planned it all, to trap me here, to take revenge..."

Jareth was shaking his head in denial. He didn't know and he would never have dreamed about deceiving her in such a way… well if he did know then perhaps something could have been planned and it wouldn't have been this clumsy.

"My dear," he began but she cut him off with a 'don't call me that!' so he tried again. "Sarah, I didn't know. I was under the impression that you were just my designer." He rubbed his face then let his hands fall onto his bare lap.

Sarah's eyes followed and she blushed suddenly. "Oh god," she said. "I can't believe I've just done that! Oh lord." She groaned and buried her head again. She spoke. "I should have known; the castle, the workers who I never saw, all the maintenance around here and most of all you. You haven't really changed I just wasn't expecting it all… oh man! I'm so stupid."

Jareth let her continue until she ran out of steam, when she did he took up the slack, "I didn't realize and I had, perhaps, more reason to. I didn't try to contact you since that night, nor did I allow the other subjects to but that is no excuse. I should have recognized your imprint once you set foot here for the second time but I just passed it off as you being somewhat otherworldly."

She looked up at him, still shaking and disturbed. Jareth really couldn't blame her. He was doing everything in his power not to surrender to the shock himself. But when she spoke, her voice was steady and clear. "Can I go now? I think I need a moment to situate myself."

Jareth was expecting that, "Go. I'll bring some breakfast along."

She looked away. "Can you get someone else to? I think it would be for the best…"

He was expecting that too. "It will be a goblin, then." He warned. When she made no objections he sighed. "Of course. Good bye, Sarah."

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Upon entering her own room, Sarah shed the blankets and sheets wrapped around her and made her way into the bathroom provided. At first glance, it resembled any other private bathroom attached to a single room much like a hotel or a B&B but Sarah never trusted anything to first glances, not when it came to decorating. It was obvious now that those fat ugly cherubs around the legs of the bath and the stand of the sink were truly goblins dressed up in wings holding bows and arrows. They were not circling nicely, nor at peace with the other. Each arrow was pointed at something. It was either another cherub, or, in a few cases, at the one holding the bow. In one instance, a cherub like goblin was pointing the arrow straight out at whoever was viewing the piece. Sarah felt uncomfortable with that assessment and looked away, filling her bath.

She soaked for twenty minutes, scrubbing uselessly at her skin to remove the permanent goose bumps left from that man's touch. She drained the water and filled it again, absently wondering when such a king would have installed plumbing. She soaked for a longer time, loosing track when she dozed, only waking because the water has turned cold. She sighed and climbed out, wrapping her own housecoat around herself. A tray of mouth watering food sat at the desk but there was no one in sight. Sarah felt a stab of regret at not getting to see a goblin but she had a feeling that more would come out.

The hour or so of avoiding any type of thought had done wonders. Now Sarah allowed herself to sit, drink her coffee and think about the past events.

Facts she knew:

She was in the Underground assisting the Goblin King in remodelling his castle.

Said Goblin King claims that he didn't know who she was.

He was a very thorough lover and was sexy as all hell.

She was falling in love with him.

That thought brought her up short and she studied it from different angles, trying to see a falsehood in it. There was none to be found. Sarah sighed. She knew that she would have to talk to Jareth sooner or later and the longer she left it for the more uncomfortable the conversation would be.

Sarah finished her breakfast, trying to savour the tastes but nothing truly registered. She got dressed in one of the many suits she packed. This time it was a sensible pant suit which she wore when she didn't want to extra attention drawn to her body. Her hair was brushed out and she placed a clip in the back to hold it off her face. Her face was scrubbed clean again but leaving off makeup. She looked drawn and pasty but she couldn't bring herself to care either.

Taking a deep breath, Sarah straightened her back and opened her door, making her way down to the small study that had become the meeting place. As she wondered the halls she felt the unsettling feeling that comes from becoming too familiar with a structure in hostile territory but that didn't stop her from wondering the corridors with ease.

The door was opened a crack and Sarah could see Jareth through it. She steeled herself and knocked.

His head lifted and he nodded when he noticed who it was. "Come in, please." He said, all business now.

Sarah took a deep breath and entered, forming an apology in her mind. She entered.

"Ms. Hardone, please sit down." Jareth greeted. Sarah had a difficult time thinking him of Mr. Gob now that she knew who he was. It was never his name and it didn't really suit him.

"You know my name. Calling me by my stage name doesn't change that, Jareth." She said quietly, looking at him and trying to make peace. It worked and he smiled a little.

"Alright Sarah, we'll do it your way." He teased. He opened his mouth to speak again but Sarah ran him over.

"Wait, before you say anything more, I'm sorry for how I behaved this morning. I fell apart. The dreams… I swear I replayed every event which took place here the last time. I- it unsettled me."

Jareth was nodding. "That's understandable and I can't say that I blame you. But things may get worse for you, I'm afraid."

He sat closer to his desk and pulled out a news clipping from the obituaries. It read:

In Loving Memory of Sarah Anne Williams Hardone, beloved daughter, sister and designer.
Survived by father, Robert Williams; brother, Toby Williams
Predeceased by mother, Linda Williams
A memorial service will be held at Saint Mary's Cathedral in Amsterdam, New York.

Sarah looked at the piece for a moment. The picture was one she sent to her family about five years ago. Then she checked the date. November 18, 2003.

Her head snapped up. "I've been Underground for three months? I've been here for two weeks!"

"Yes, well. Time does run differently here then there."

Sarah frowned and threw down the clipping. "Last time I was here I spent thirteen hours here and only four passed in Aboveground!"

He looked uncomfortable. "That was me. Technically, you shouldn't have noticed any time change, however, I thought you deserved a break from your duties. That was part of the game, not the rules of nature between realms."

Sarah was shaking her head. "I've been gone for three months. What's going to happen when I suddenly show up? What would I say? 'Oh I'm sorry. I was out of town…'" Her voice was increasing its octave and Jareth had to keep from wincing at the tone.

"Now, Sarah it's not as difficult as all that. Just say that you met someone and decided to take an impromptu vacation. I will vouch for you."

Sarah calmed her breathing with an effort and managed a weak smile. She picked up the clipping again. "This says it's to take place on the 23rd. When is that according to Underground time?"

"Tomorrow. Early in the morning if you want to make it on time."

"Can we leave today? Now?"

Jareth sighed. "If you wish…"

"I do."

He nodded. "Pack your belongings and meet me at the front entrance."

She stood. "Thank you," she whispered without looking back and slipped out the door.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Jareth watched her go. If it weren't for his guilty conscience then he would have attempted to keep her there. However, she did more then he expected. The castle was now in the process of going from depressing to clean, comfortable and organized. The areas included in the labyrinth run were still untouched so it kept the same foreboding atmosphere.

A goblin ran into his study carrying a pile of rolled plans. She quickly filed the plans in the appropriate boxes and scurried out again. That morning, Jareth lifted the banishment. If Sarah saw a weird creature running about all that would happen is she might scream. Though, he paused to reflect, she would more then likely make friends with the little monster and make the thing turn traitor to him. There would be no risk of exposure.

Not quite ten minutes later Jareth met Sarah at the entrance. She was carrying one bag and her purse on her shoulder.

"This is all I need for now. I can grab the other bag at a later time." She said as a way of explanation. Jareth tampered the flare of hope he felt. Maybe she would be back…

"We should go. This will be uncomfortable for you but it's faster then the way we came." Jareth focused and created a crystal. It had an image of a rustic house with a man sitting on the front porch, holding a news paper in his hand. The location was Sarah's old home and the man was her grieving father. He held out his hand to the woman. "Please, hold my hand."

Sarah hesitated for only a moment before giving her hand over. Jareth smashed the crystal and a vortex opened beneath them, sucking them in and traveling a hundred thousand kilometres in about two seconds.

Sarah was appearing slightly disorientated and she tripped on her way to the front of the house. Jareth cursed to himself as he helped her. Another crystal created and shattered set the street to forget the sudden appearance and allowed Robert to break down suddenly to keep him properly distracted. A black sleek car appeared just as suddenly and was finally noticed by the bereaved father.

His eyes widened and his mouth fell open. He stood, knocking over the small table as well as his coffee cup, breaking the glass.

"S-Sarah! Oh, Sarah. Karen. Karen! It's Sarah! She's here! She's alive. Come quick!" He stumbled down the few steps and threw his arms around her. "Oh you're here! You're alive." He was sobbing now and Sarah was trying to quiet him but tears rolled down her own cheeks.

An aging woman with grey hair followed by a gangly teenager with blond hair and blue eyes rushed to the open door. The woman took a step back at the sight, holding on the frame and clenching her chest in one hand. The teenager pushed through and rushed down the steps to throw his arms around Sarah's back. The two men ushered Sarah into the house as they cried or laughed and yelled. Jareth only smiled and wandered down the street to a little park that used to be a favourite haunt.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah finally escaped after telling the family a concocted tale about not being in a part of England with proper correspondence and being immersed in a project. She went outside for some fresh air and to see if she could find the one and only Mr. Gob.

He wasn't in sight. Sarah sighed and looked to the shiny black car with tinted windows. She went to the back and knocked, hoping he would be in there. The front passenger window buzzed down and Sarah looked. She was met with the smiling face of Silvestre.

"Hello, my dear."

"Oh hi Silvestre. Have to seen Jareth around?"

Silvestre winked. "He went down the street that way," he jerked a thumb over his shoulder. "I think he just wanted to give you some space."

Sarah thanked him and wondered down the street. At the end of it was the park so she was pretty sure of her destination. She was right.

He was standing at the end of the small field, near the stand of trees, looking up. Sarah admired him for a moment then made her way slowly to him.

He looked. "How was the reunion?"

Sarah took a deep breath, breathing in his scent. "I don't know how to thank you. I've been estranged from my family for over ten years. It was to the point that I was convinced they never cared and if I showed up dead, they would just forget me." She grabbed his hand and pressed the palm to her cheek. "You helped begin the healing process."

Jareth smiled, glad something at least worked out for her. His smile was only slightly touched by sorrow. Sarah kept her voice light, hopefully to ease him out of the depression that threatened to pull him in. "It's been nice, you know?"

"And short," Jareth countered.

Sarah just grinned. "Yes, well, it doesn't necessarily have to end… The castle is not yet finished." She waved her hand dismissively. "Sure the plans are all done, but I have been known to check up on my work."

Jareth picked up on her line of thought almost instantaneously. "The Underground is a wonderful place for vacation as well. If at all you need to get away…"

Sarah took a step closer until their bodies almost touched. "What an intriguing idea. I've never had reason to go on holiday before."

His palm that was still touching her cheek moved, sliding down to her neck while his other arm wrapped around her waist. "It's never too late to pamper yourself…"

She inched nearer still and their chests touched. She tilted her chin up, gazing at his lips. "Pamper me." She begged.

Jareth obliged her.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Mic was just going through the other finances left over from Ms. Hardone's business when erratic activity with her bank accounts suddenly too action. It was locked out when she was declared MIA and later deceased. However, at the moment it was open and active, the account growing to the amount of three times more then the last cheque received from Mr. Gob. Mic, still in the stages of grief and disbelief, was about to call the bank and demand what was going on when the phone rang.

He stared at it for a moment before answering it tentatively.

"Hello?"

"Mic? Oh how are you?"

"Ms. Hardone?" his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"Yes, Mic. It's me. I'm so sorry, I didn't know what mess this would create. Everything is fine now."

"Ms. Hardone, what happened to you?"

"It's a bit complicated... I was in the middle of a project and I became so absorbed with the work. It was at a residence where outside communication is hard to come by."

"But I called a lieutenant. He said there was no address for that street in Amesbury. He-."

"Was probably mistaken. Why would someone with the title 'lieutenant' spend time looking for an American girl who usually throws herself head long into intense situations? I'm back. I'm alive and safe. There is nothing more to worry about."

"Well one more thing… That cheque you deposited was bounced, but not ten minutes ago, your account just tripled that amount."

"Ah yes, Mr. Gob expressed his worry that the cheque was faulty so he sent it through again with the full amount he owed me. I believe there was a bonus in there as well…"

"That's quite a bonus."

"Oh, I know it is." She laughed. "By the way, Mic, I will be taking a vacation after this job. A very long vacation. I think we all deserve it."

"Yes, Ms. Hardone. I think God every time that my daughters were never like you. You would have given me a heart attack five times over already!"

Mic heard the drone of a masculine voice in the background and Ms. Hardone murmuring back. "Sorry Mic," She said into the receiver. "I have to run, vacation is about to being."

"Be safe, Ms. Hardone. And please, next time you disappear for three months, try and touch base at least once!"

"I will Mic. I will. And take care of yourself. I see you finally made that appointment."

"It was only a small cyst, Sarah. And I seem to recall telling you to mind your own business."

Her only response was to laugh again. The line went dead and Mic hung up the phone reluctantly. It seems that she found more then a rich client. Mic could only hope that the girl found something in him that was a bit more permanent. She may not be his daughter by blood but he has grown fond of her and he wanted to see her happy as much as he wanted to see his own children happy.

STEAMIN'DESIGNS

Sarah never married, but she gradually left her consuming and exhausting work, spending more and more time in the Underground. The castle was finished so she extended her efforts to the city and the labyrinth until there was an unquestionable signature all over the Labyrinth that distinctly said 'Ms. Hardone'.

However, when she wasn't convincing her family Aboveground that she was healthy and happy and she wasn't thinking up new and unique designs for this or that goblin's home, she was laying on her back with her legs spread high in the air with the most delicious man pumping and thrusting and ramming into her.

These encounters usually ended with her legs flinging higher, his hips digging deeper and twisting and rolling to completion.

The End