Hmm…uh…Me wrote this story when I was thinking about eating peanut butter but was too lazy to get up and get some…and then I remembered me laptop was here…and thus this was born!! Ya…well let get it on!

The Mystery of the Mr. Peanut and Butters Caper

Chapter One: Butters's new T.V.

It was a wonderful day in South Park, which was very surprising. At the Scotch residence a delivery truck could be seen unloading a plasma screen T.V. Mr. Scotch brought it into his son's room.

"Hey Butters, come here for a second." He said.

"Yes dad?" said Butters.

"Look son, I know your getting older, and you'll want a little more privacy, so I thought if you had your own television you would get the privacy you've always wanted, and the learn to understand the responsibility of having an electronical device in your room."

"…but I'm only eight."

"The earlier you start the better!" Mr. Scotch said cheerfully as he left the room.

"O-oh dear…" said Butters as he looked at the huge screen before him. "Wonder what I'll do with it…Hmm…I know, I'll invite my friends for a sleepover to help me enjoy it!" he then ran out of his room to plan for the next day. The door to his room came steadily to a close, and the second it shut a small flash of green light emanated from the television for a few seconds and then it turned back to its original black state.

The next day at school, Butters had asked is friends over to his sleepover.

"Oh hell no." said Cartman. "There is no way I hell that I'm going to your sleepover Butters."

"Yea Butters," said Kyle. "not to sound mean but it does sound kinda lame."

"Yea, the Jew would know, he's hella lame."

"Shut up fatass!"

"Ahh com'on guys." Butters pleaded. "My mom'll make cookies, and we could watch Terrance and Philip, and my dad just bought me a huge plasma screen T.V."

"Holy crap you had me at cookies." Said Cartman.

"You got a new T.V? Sweet!" said Stan.

"Mmmnffee mwe mu munnh mwurn." Said Kenny.

"No Kenny I think you can only get that stuff on pay-per-view." Said Kyle.

"Muh?"

"Ha! Kenny's doesn't know about pay-per-view cuz he's hella poor." Said Cartman

"Mwaa mu!"

"Yea Cartman and stop saying that!" Said Kyle.

"Hey you Jew! You will respect mah authoriteh!"

"Screw you!"

"(Sigh) We'll see you Butters." Said Stan.

"Okay. Oh boy, this is gonna be awesome!" said Butters.

The boys arrived at Butters's house and Mrs. Scotch let them in. After they watched Terrance and Philip, they ate their cookies and went to Butters's room (Cartman also carried a good thirty extra cookies with him.)

"Awesome T.V dude." Said Stan as he revealed his Terrance and Philip sleeping bag.

"Yea, it's bigger than Cartman's ass." Said Kyle as he also revealed a Terrance and Philip Sleeping bag, but his was the Halloween version.

"No it's not you guys." Said Cartman. Kenny unraveled his out-of-date tattered black sleeping bag.

"Well, well well, it seems that Kenny is so hella poor that he can't even afford a decent sleeping bag unlike mine!" said Cartman smugly as he unraveled his sleeping bag.

"…Dude…wtf is that?" said Stan.

"Well, this is a My little Pony, 10th anniversary, special royal Pinkie Pie edition sleeping bag. It is the rarest of rare sleeping bags. There's only four of them in the world, and I am a proud owner of one…Bet you're jealous aren't you Kyle!" yelled Cartman.

"Why the hell would I be jealous of some gay-ass sleeping bag a fatass owns?" said Kyle.

"Em not fat em BIG-BONED!"

"Uh…well let's watch some T.V." said Butters as he took the remote. He pressed the ON button but nothing happened. "Hmm, that's strange."

"Ah damn don't tell me the TV's broken!" said Cartman.

"Hey look, it's not plugged in." said Stan.

"Mwe ma mit." Said Kenny. He then went to the plug in the wall. Before he had it in the wall a strange green light appeared from the T.V screen. It hit Butters and it was levitating him from the ground.

"Holy hamburgers!" yelped Butters in mid-air.

"Butters what the hell is wrong with your T.V." Said Kyle.

"I-I don't know!" Just then a great flash of green light filled the room, and also electrocuted Kenny. After a few seconds, the light dissipated. Stan noticed Kenny's burnt body.

"Oh my god they killed Kenny." Said Stan flatly.

"You bastards-hey where'd Butters go?" said Kyle.

"I think the light took him away."

"Com'on guys, it's impossible for someone to be captured by a light." Said Cartman.

"Well, what about the time aliens put a probe up your ass?" said Kyle.

"I told you guys that was a dream, dammit!"

"Hmm…Kenny's dead, Butters's gone, and the T.V was destroyed in the flash of light…so what do we do now?" asked Stan. They all pondered on their next action. "Wanna play with Cartman's alien probe?"

"Sweet dude!" said Kyle.

"Yea kickass! …Hey wait a minute, I told you guys that was a dr-" said Cartman before Kyle operated his probe device. "I love to singa! About the moona and the tuna and the springa! I love to singa!"

"Dude, where'd you get this anyway?" said Kyle

"Oh I found it in a cow field." Said Stan. The next day they left Butters's house with a very un-amused Cartman. The T.V flashed one last time as they left.

Hmm…this in my first south ark story…I think its petty good…humor could get better, oh and I'm gonna brig Kenny back to life in each chapter so if you have any ideas for a death situation tell me.