The Quileute Holiday Special 2017
HalcyonSeasons x Lady Blackwater
Authors' Notes:
HS: Y'all already know what the fuck goin' on. My best friend Lady Blackwater and I are finally collabing. It only makes sense since we spend all our time discussing Twilight fuckery, anyway. Btw, in this fic, Renesmee doesn't exist and Quil never imprinted on Claire. Happy holidays!
LB: Hey, bitches! Enjoy even though half of y'all won't read this. And to the ones who do read it, y'all better not complain.
Shit, twenty-three-year-old Jacob Black thought to himself on a crisp late-November day. I really have to get a gift for Leah.
It wasn't out of resentment or anything; Jacob was just nervous as shit. Sam Uley and Emily Young were putting on a Friendsgiving/Secret Santa gift exchange/ugly Christmas sweater type of event for the first time in three years, and of course, out of all people, Jacob had gotten Leah Clearwater for the gift exchange. He'd read over the emails plenty of times. Emily had planned the party out to a T. Jacob really had to get a gift for his estranged ex-girlfriend. Even worse, nobody had wanted switch with him—and he had definitely done as much begging as he could.
He wasn't too familiar with the department stores in Port Angeles' mall. Forever 21, H&M, Urban Outfitters, whatever… They all sold the same things and none of it made sense to him. When he thought about it (which he tried really hard not to do), Leah still didn't make sense to him, either.
Leah had left him three years ago.
Yeah, it was that bad.
After dating for about a year, they had moved into a one-bedroom apartment together in Forks that hadn't been much in the grand scheme of things, but it had been their space. Just the two of them. They'd both had jobs in town—Jacob had worked at a convenience store and Leah had worked at a boutique. Jacob had been pretty content, and Leah had seemed just as happy.
It turned out, though, that she had been planning on leaving town for years. He still couldn't believe it to this day. Since before they had even started dating, she had been saving up money and making plans to move to Long Beach, California. She had struck him to be a little depressed in the time that they had been together, but that depression had managed to grow with time, and one rainy night in May—May 2nd, to be exact—he had confronted her.
He couldn't bear to think about it again, even after all these years, but that night in May three years ago had been the last time he'd ever seen her. She'd quickly packed a bag, unveiled two more bags that had already been packed, and left. He hadn't heard a word from her since. And he might have never learned where she'd gone if he hadn't later talked to Seth, her younger brother.
"She's in Long Beach now," he'd told him easily. "California, not Washington. She really likes it there."
God DAMN.
So Jacob hadn't heard a word from Leah in the last three years until about a month ago. In October, Emily had sent out a massive email to a mailing list of eleven other people, detailing the holiday party. Jacob didn't have anything better to be doing—besides the regular patrols he did on his own, since he was still phasing— so he had RSVP'd to the event.
He had gotten all the emails, and everybody planned on going. Everybody. Even Leah. And what made things worse was that her birthday had just passed. He didn't have a choice but to get her a gift. No matter how elusive she was, no matter how many questions he had for her, no matter how confused he was, he still had to get her a gift. He was only gonna get her one present, though. It wasn't his fault that he birthday was so close to the holidays, so she would just have to deal.
Jacob roamed the mall for what felt like an eternity, as misguided and confused as a lost puppy. The nervousness didn't subside as he searched for the perfect gift for Leah. He visited a multitude of stores, and he was on his way out of the mall when he accidentally made eye contact with a salesman standing near a jewelry stand. And everyone knew kiosk salesmen at the mall were unavoidable once eye contact was made.
What the hell, he thought, making his way over to the stand. I guess I'll check it out.
Jacob sighed heavily as he drove onto Emily and Sam's driveway a couple days later, on Black Friday. He instantly recognized Paul's rusty pickup truck parked next to Sam's shiny new Jeep in the garage.
Just as Jacob turned down the radio and killed the engine, Sam was entering the garage through the backdoor and heading for the mini-fridge when he spotted his friend pulling into the driveway. An instant smile graced Sam's face, and instinctively, Jacob smiled back.
"Jacob Black!" Sam called with his arms stretched wide for a brotherly hug. Jacob grabbed his gift for Leah, stuck it in his pocket, and locked the car behind him before meeting Sam halfway with an enthusiastic hug.
"Aw, man," he said, patting him on the back. "Sam Uley. It's always good to see your old-ass face when I come home."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Sam rolled his eyes in mock annoyance as they pulled away from their embrace. "Glad you could make it, asshole."
"Wouldn't miss a dinner with my family for anything," he responded.
Not that I had anything better to do, he thought to himself, but he didn't let his expression show it.
"Who else is supposed to be coming, again?" Jacob asked as he watched Sam dig through the mini-fridge for a minute, then catching a bag of ice tossed his way.
"Everyone," Sam answered simply with a bag of ice thrown over his shoulder, shutting the garage door shut as he lead them back into the house.
Jacob gulped despite already know that answer.
Everyone.
Maybe he was subconsciously hoping Sam was going to tell him that Leah had decided she was too good for the campiness of a holiday dinner at home then said she wasn't going to come, but that'd just work too well in his favor.
The instant he entered the house, the aroma of turkey and smoked ham flooded Jacob's nostrils and the overwhelming nostalgic sense of home warmed him to the core. If there was one thing he could say he missed about getting together with everyone, it was the amazing meal Emily always made.
Maybe this wouldn't be that bad.
Sam rounded the corner connecting the hallway to the kitchen. "Jacob's here!" he announced.
Despite her hair and makeup not being done and stains galore covering her holiday-themed apron over her leggings and faded Metallica t-shirt, Emily managed to look cheery and beautiful when a huge grin stretched across her face.
"Jacob!" she exclaimed, abandoning the turkey she'd just extracted from the oven and put on the stove top. She threw her arms around Jacob's neck and squeezed. "Oh, you're here! I missed you!"
"Hey, Em," he muttered with his arms wrapped tightly around his old friend. He'd never understand how Emily managed to stay so positive and happy about any and everything—especially about seeing him of all people—but he wouldn't complain.
"That smells amazing. You must've been slaving away all day," he noted, eyeing the large bird with hungry eyes.
"I mean, I think I did alright." She nodded, proud of her work but still shrugging with nonchalance. "So, what'd you bring?"
The question made Jacob's blood run cold.
Fuck.
They'd explicitly said this was a potluck dinner in the group email, and to nobody's surprise, he had been so caught up with Leah to even remember to bring anything. Not even a fucking pathetic plate of stale cookies in the shape of snowflakes and Christmas trees.
"Aw, damn, I'm sorry, Em," he apologized quickly with his head down. "I forgot completely and—"
"No, it's fine, Jacob!" she interrupted, suppressing her disappointment with a smile, looking over his casual attire of jeans, snow boots, sweater, and leather jacket with confusion. "I see you forgot the ugly Christmas sweater, too!"
Damnit.
Before Jacob could respond with another sorry excuse, Paul entered the room—also not wearing an ugly sweater but a white wife beater, jeans, and a dingy Santa hat that Jacob was sure he had stolen from the mall Santa—saving Jacob from crashing and burning.
"Jacob!" Paul actually sounded enthused to see him, but upon further inspection and hugging him, Jacob could easily tell the guy was on his way to being drunk as hell, which only furthered the homey feeling.
"Man, I can't believe I'm seeing my favorite pack brother after three long-ass years!" he whooped, moving out of Emily's way as she bustled about the kitchen. "How you been, you dickhead? Can't call or text a muh-fucker anymore?"
Jacob exhaled slowly. He was not ready for these questions, especially from Paul. "I've been around, man. Just… around."
"Around" roughly translated to I haven't been up to a damn thing, and as goofy as Paul was, he could definitely see right through Jacob and tell that much.
Paul eyed him closely.
"Yeah. Around," he repeated and punched his shoulder lightly. "Can't ghost on me. I'm always watching."
It was hard to know when Paul was serious and when he was fucking with someone; Jacob assumed this was one of those in-between times, and just nodded in agreement.
"Oh, by the way," Paul quirked up, snapping his finger with realization. "Would you happen to have an iPhone 5 charger on you?"
Same old Paul.
"Missed you, too, Paul," Jacob laughed, genuine in what he's said. He did miss Paul, and if he was already this tipsy, it was making to be an interesting night.
"At least somebody missed him," Sam said begrudgingly. "He's been living here for two days."
"The longest forty-eight hours of my life," Emily said, leaning into Sam, side-eyeing Paul.
"Shit, two days?" Jacob asked Paul. "Why?"
"I drove up from Arizona," he said. "I've been staying there for a couple of months since my aunt passed away. Helping out with the family and shit, you know."
Jacob hadn't realized how out of the loop he'd been. He nodded.
"Are you and Rachel good?" he asked. The question immediately made him feel like an asshole. He hardly even talked to his sister these days.
"Uhh…" Paul began to falter nervously at the thought of his imprint. "It's complicated. She's been in Silverdale and I've… well, I've been in Arizona and now I'm here."
Emily and Sam exchanged a secretive side eyed glance to one another and sipped their hot cocoa gingerly out of their matching holiday mugs.
"Is Rachel coming today?" Jacob wondered.
"She said she couldn't make it," Paul replied dryly. "She always comes back, though."
Jacob just nodded again for lack of anything better to say. "Alright."
Within time, more people began to arrive.
Collin Littlesea and Brady Fuller, the youngest members of the pack, arrive together much like everything else they did.
"Hi!" Emily greeted them, still enthusiastic—or at least enthusiastic as she could be since they also failed to wear ugly Christmas sweaters. She pulled them into warm embraces.
"Sorry about the sweaters," Collin told her sheepishly before she could comment.
"Yeah," Brady said lamely. "We forgot."
"That's alright," Emily said sweetly, gesturing to the plastic bag in Brady's hand. "At least you guys actually brought food. That's more effort than some people." She flashed Paul and Jacob a playful look, but it shot deep in both of their souls.
"Hey, I did bring something!" Paul protested, gesturing to the dining room.
"You can't eat beer," Jacob muttered smartly under his breath to which Emily rolled her eyes at.
"Mind your business," Paul replied, shoving him in his chest a little.
"Oh, uh, sorry, Em," Collin said nervously, avoiding eye contact. "I didn't really have time to cook."
Emily narrowed her eyes. "Then what did you bring?"
Brady took a can of green beans out of the bag. "Green beans and corn."
"I'm not throwing a food drive," Emily said, semi-upset but remaining positive. "But I'll take it.
The doorbell rang moments later.
Who the fuck uses the doorbell? Jacob thought, and his question was soon answered. Sam opened the front door to reveal the evergood, polite, and grinning Seth Clearwater clad in the ugliest Christmas sweater Jacob had ever seen and holding a glass pan covered in foil.
Sam pulled him in for a gentle side hug, clapping his shoulder. "Hey, Seth, what's up?"
"Nothing much, gramps," he replied in good humor, smiling up at his old pack leader.
He then took the time to greet everybody else, saving Emily for last after setting down the home-cooked dish on the kitchen counter.
"You actually read my emails!" Emily said excitedly, pulling him in for a hug so warm that it could rival the sun.
"Yeah, of course," he said, still grinning.
"What'd you make?" Emily asked, gesturing to the dish on the counter.
"Squash casserole."
Emily, Sam, Paul, and Jacob exchanged a disgusted look.
"Well, shit," Paul said. "At least you cooked."
"I got the recipe from my girlfriend," Seth told them, trying to defend herself.
Everyone was silent.
"She's white," he added quietly.
Everyone then immediately nodded. It all made sense. They didn't feel bad, though. At least he hadn't imprinted on her.
Jared Cameron and his imprint Kim Conweller entered the house next, around twenty minutes later. They both wore sweaters, but they were neither Christmas-themed nor ugly. Emily wasn't too surprised with Jared's choice of attire since he could be forgetful, anyway, but she was slightly disappointed with Kim.
"You forgot the ugly sweater," Emily said, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice as she pulled Kim into a hug. By this point, she had already changed into her own Christmas sweater, and thank God there wasn't a contest for the ugliest sweater. She would have won by a landslide.
"Shit, I'm so sorry, Em," Kim replied. "I was in such a rush that I completely spaced and wore the first thing I saw."
"That's okay. How was the drive from Seattle?"
"Not too bad," Kim replied.
Jared greeted the guys, and Kim suddenly remembered that she had forgotten to bring a food.
"Shit," she hissed. "I forgot the pasta."
"So did everyone else," Emily assured her. "We'll make do."
Jacob felt relief wash over him when his best friends Quil and Embry finally showed up. Neither of them wore ugly sweaters (of course), but Emily and Sam still seemed elated to see them. Those two could really improve the mood.
Emily, however, could not even pretend to be surprised that Quil brought two bottles of Hennessy instead of actual food. She rolled her eyes as she pulled him into a hug. Embry, however, brought an ample amount of roasted potatoes, which Emily was overly grateful for.
Jacob individually bro-hugged Quil and Embry, and at last, he felt at home. It was as if they'd never separated.
"How've you been, man?" Quil asked him.
"Not bad," Jacob replied. "What have you guys been up to? How's Seattle?"
"Rooming with this dickhead hasn't been too bad," Embry said, playfully elbowing Quil.
"At least I pay rent on time," Quil replied.
"You have a job?" Jacob asked, causing Embry to burst in laughter.
"Ha, ha," Quil said sarcastically. "I'll just have you know that my music career has been taking the fuck off. You've got no idea, bro."
"What's your stage name again?" Jacob teased. "Trinket G?"
"Uh, it's Delinquent V," Quil clarified. "As a matter of fact, bump this." He began to pull out something from his jacket pocket and then Embry stopped him.
"Keep your mixtape to yourself, man." He turned to Jacob. "Is Leah here?"
"Uh, why?" Jacob asked nervously.
Embry gave him a wary look. "Because it's been a fat minute since I've seen her," he said slowly. "Oh, right, you guys used to date, huh?"
Jacob nodded.
"How long's it been since you guys broke up?" Quil asked.
"Three years," Jacob replied, trying not to sound as gloomy as he was feeling.
"Tough shit," Embry said.
Jacob hadn't rehearsed what the hell he would do or say if he'd ever see Leah again. Realistically, he knew he'd have to face her again given their social circle, but now that the moment had come, his heart wouldn't stop banging to be let out of his chest.
"Alright, man," Embry started, squeezing Jacob's shoulder encouragingly after peeking out the front window. "She's here. Now when she walks in, just be cool. Don't say anything wild, okay?"
Jacob nodded, quickly exhaling. "Yeah, I got this."
Like something out of a movie, the front door opened and Jacob's heart rate spiked, beating so loud that he heard it over his friends greeting Leah with open arms and excited faces.
God, she looked gorgeous.
She was still just as statuesque as Jacob remembered her, standing at an intimidating six-foot-two with her expensive-looking, designer brand, black velvet ankle boots adding a few inches. The black leather leggings she wore did wonders for her thighs, hips, and backside—it was hard not to notice that part. Almost without even trying, her glitzy gold watch and large hoop earrings matched perfectly with the emerald crewneck sweater hung loosely around her firm torso.
Leah's hair was at her shoulders now, styled bone straight with a center part complementing the immaculate symmetry of her face that was adorned with copper eyeshadow, shaped dark eyebrows, lengthy eyelashes, peachy orange cheekbones, and a subtle nude brown lipstick.
Even her nails were done.
Fuck.
You can do this, he thought. It's just Leah.
Her beamed from ear to ear as she greeted everyone. Upon seeing him, her smile dialed back a notch or two, but she still remained friendly-looking, and Jacob was sure he was about to die on the spot.
"Hey, Quil," she said, touching his shoulder and then nodded to Embry. "Hey, Em."
"Hey, Lee," they said in unison and immediately looked at Jacob.
You've got this! they seemed to be saying, and Jacob was sure he did, too.
Leah finally turned to him. "Hey, Ja—"
"Y-y-your ass is looking fat as hell in those leggings," he quickly blurted out, and he wished the floor would swallow him whole at this particular moment.
Quil and Embry snickered to themselves after they processed that their friend actually said that and Leah just stared at him, indecisive on whether she should be flattered or confused.
Jacob prepared himself to get slapped, but instead, Leah nodded with an unimpressed scoff, turned on her heels, and joined Emily and Kim in the kitchen.
Leah still had an unamused expression on her face when she set her plastic bag on the kitchen counter. "Sorry I'm late," she told Emily. "My Uber took forever and I had to go by the store first."
"That's okay," Emily said. "What'd you bring?"
Leah began to unpack the shopping bag. "Well, since we're dealing with the pack, I just assumed nobody would remember to get the essentials, so I got paper plates, napkins, and forks."
"Aww, Lee, you really thought of us," Kim said, smiling at her.
"Too bad nobody actually brought food," Emily added, grimacing slightly.
"Are you serious?" Leah asked, her thick eyebrows raised.
"I cooked a little, Paul brought beer, Collin and Brady brought canned vegetables that they expect me to cook, Seth brought a squash casserole from his white girlfriend, Embry brought roasted potatoes, and Quil brought Hennessy," Emily explained.
Leah rolled her big brown eyes. "Leave it to the pack," she said, peering into the living room.
Damn near instinctively, her gaze fell upon Jacob. She simply couldn't help it since it had been so long since she'd seen him, and while he was still a fucking jackass, he looked really nice today in his simple sweater and jeans. She quickly looked back down at the paper plates.
"Yo, Em," Jared said, approaching the girls. "I'm really sorry about the food situation. Do you care if I order a couple pizzas? I know it's untraditional, but at least it's something."
"We're Natives celebrating Thanksgiving," Emily reminded him. "I don't think traditions matter too much right now. Go ahead." She flashed him a smile. At least somebody was helping.
While Emily had already cooked the turkey, the macaroni and cheese still wasn't done yet, and honestly, she didn't feel like going to the store to get more food. Emily was sitting down for the first time in what felt like ages when Quil came by the dining table.
"Hey," he said to her easily, "how close is dinner to being ready?"
"Pretty close," she told him. "We hardly have any food, though. If I give you some money, could you run to the store for me?"
"Uhh…" Quil faltered and looked off to the side sheepishly.
"You're already fucked up, huh?" Emily guessed, disappointed but not at all surprised that the pack had managed to get loose so quickly.
"Shit, I wish," he said. "I actually came over to get some more." He gestured to the red plastic cups on the kitchen counter, next to a few cans of Coke and a single bottle of Hennessy that was already halfway empty.
She pouted. It seemed like exactly nothing was going her way tonight, and things hadn't even really gotten started.
"Hey, I'll tell you what," Quil began. "I'll get Jake and Embry to go to the store."
"I don't care who goes," Emily said. "Just get somebody. And get me a drink while you're at it."
"Oooh, Emily's widdit," Quil teased. He began to pour her a mixed drink that seemed to have a lot more Hennessy than Coke in it, but she didn't say anything.
He handed her the cup and sloppily clinked it to his own.
Before she forgot (since Quil already did), Emily located Jacob and Embry in the living room, watching TV with Paul, Jared, and Seth. She quickly glanced at the giant Christmas tree that she and Sam had taken over two hours to decorate. There was an ample amount of gifts underneath it; at least nobody had forgotten about the gift exchange.
Emily tapped Jacob on the shoulder. "Hey, can you and Embry go to the store for me real quick?" she asked, holding out two folded twenty dollar bills.
Jacob began to make a face.
"You didn't bring anything, remember?" she asked sourly.
Shit, she's right, Jacob thought. He took the money. "I gotcha," he said.
"Thanks, Jacob," she said sweetly.
In his peripherals, he spotted Leah, and he definitely knew he had to go. The house was starting to feel smaller by the minute.
Jacob and Embry hopped in the latter man's car (since it wasn't blocked in the driveway like Jacob's car) and drove off to the Thriftway, just on the edge of Forks.
The bright lights glitzing the colorful aisles of the grocery store nearly hurt Jacob's eyes as he came in with Embry by his side. He remembered exactly where everything was, but he pretended to be lost to deter questions from Embry, who looked at him with a Cheshire Cat grin.
He knew exactly what Embry was going to say about his awkward outburst with Leah, but he endured it anyway.
"So, you wanna explain why you freaked out when I told you specifically not to freak out with Leah?" he teased with a smirk in Jacob's direction before putting a bag of tortilla chips into the shopping cart.
Jacob shrugged. "I just got tongue-tied," he explained, fully imagining her before him in all her glory. "I mean, I wanted to say a simple 'hi,' but I didn't wanna make it too informal and weird."
"So telling her that her ass looks nice is the next best thing?"
Jacob's cheeked turned red with flushed heat. "It was a slip-up."
"Only you meant it."
"That's not true," Jacob disagreed, lazily looking over the label on a bag of candy before tossing it into the cart as well. "You saw how fine she looked, and it was easy for me to just mess up! She never looked that good when we were together!"
Embry side-eyed him incredulously. "She didn't have money to look that good when you were together, bumass. You and I and the rest of La Push knows she's always been way out of your league, but shit happens, and you managed to let someone that fucking fine go. That, my friend, takes a special talent."
Jacob knew Embry was absolutely right, but he did not want to admit it. "Jeez, tell me something I don't know, Em."
"I'm just sayin'!" Embry put his hands up in mock-surrender. "You already blew it once, and you're on your way to blowing it again."
"What are you—"
"Oh, come on, Jacob." Embry stopped his strides down the snack aisle to stop Jacob in his tracks and regarded him closely. "We all know you're still madly in love with Leah. This is your first time seeing her in fucking years."
"I know," Jacob said. "I know."
Embry clapped him hard on the shoulder. "Then do better."
"Okay. I'll try," Jacob said unconvincingly.
Embry stared him down. "No. Do."
"Sure, sure."
Jacob and Embry finished their grocery shopping and ended up returning to the house with what Emily would later call "a whole bunch of bullshit."
Leah and Kim were casually catching up in the living room just as they walked in. Leah glanced at Jacob briefly and stopped looking before he could look back. She and Kim had been talking about their jobs and their coworkers and their love lives (or Leah's lack thereof, these days). They had been discussing their yoga classes. Kim was thinking of leaving her yoga class and joining a boxing one at a more convenient time for her.
"Alright, Lee-Lee," Kim said, her voice suddenly much lower as she realized Jacob had returned. She gave Leah an earnest yet playful look.
Leah looked up and smiled breezily. "What?" she asked.
"You know what I'm about to ask you," Kim teased.
"No, I don't," Leah feigned ignorance.
"What do you think of Jacob?"
Leah's smile faded a bit. "Oh, I don't think of him," she said dismissively.
Kim raised an eyebrow. "You don't think of him? Really?"
"Yeah," Leah said, trying her hardest to sound convincing. "I swear."
Jacob stripped out of his leather jacket the second he put the grocery bags down on the kitchen counter. Embry followed behind him with more bags.
"God damn," he said. "It's scorching in here. Em, I'm gonna crack open a window if you don't mind."
"You must be coming down with something," Sam said, entering the kitchen. "I feel just fine."
Jacob gave him a dubious look. "Huh, I guess so," he mumbled.
The general atmosphere of the house became tense, but Jacob ignored it.
"So is dinner ready, babe?" Sam asked Emily, who was only slightly tipsy and setting food down on the rectangular dining table.
"Oh, yeah, just about," she replied. Then she peered into one of the bags that Jacob and Embry bought. She looked up at them. "What the hell did you buy?" she asked them.
Embry shrugged. "You asked us to get food."
She started to unload the rest of the bags. "You guys bought a rotisserie chicken," she began slowly. "Tortilla chips, salsa, candy, hot chocolate, a single can of peas, deviled eggs, fruit cups, Gogurts, and more alcohol."
"So…?" Quil piped up from the wrap-around couch in the living room.
"So, a whole bunch of bullshit," she hissed at him.
Quil made a scared face and turned back to the TV.
"Aw, babe, it's okay," Sam said, rubbing her shoulders. "It's still something."
"I guess," she grumbled.
The dining table was set up within minutes, the pizzas arrived, and finally, it was time to eat. Everybody sat around the long mahogany table, and it was hardly crowded with the twelve of the them. Some people did bump elbows, though. Jacob silently thanked God that he sat between Quil and Embry and not Leah. After their last verbal encounter, he was afraid he'd say something even worse in reaction to bumping elbows with her. He sat directly across from her, though. All he had stuck in his mind was Embry telling him, Do better.
Before everybody could eat, Sam decided to say grace. For what reason, Jacob had no clue. He knew for damn sure that Sam didn't go to church.
Everybody bowed their heads and joined hands. Sam, who sat at the head of the table, began. "God is grace, God is good. God, we thank you for our food. Bow our heads, we all—"
"I'll take it from here, Sam," Quil interrupted.
Jacob looked up at him with wide eyes. Then he turned to Embry and whispered, "What the fuck." Embry shrugged.
"Everybody, close your eyes," Quil said. Everyone did as so.
"I wanna thank God," he began. He let go of Jacob and Brady's hands. He was gesturing dramatically, all with his eyes close. "But most importantly, I wanna thank Jesus for this food. We've got all the munchies. We've got some bomb-ass food made by Emily. We've got pizza. Shit, we've got Hennessy. It's lit. All my motherfuckin' family is here after a hella long time, thanks to you. Thank you, Jesus, 'cause without you, none of this shit would have been possible. You're a real one for that. On my mama. A-motherfuckin'-men."
By the time he opened his eyes, everybody was already passing around the food and starting to eat.
"Hey, guys," Seth piped up as he passed his squash casserole to Paul, who swiftly passed it along to Collin. "We should go around the table and say what we're grateful for."
"Not a bad idea," Jared said. "Just don't let Quil get a turn."
Everyone started laughing, even Quil. "My saying grace was the shit, though, right?" he asked, smirking.
"Yeah, right," Paul said, causing Quil to playfully flip him off.
"I'll start," Jared said. "I'm thankful that me and my beautiful girlfriend made the trip from Seattle to see all our friends. I'm really happy to be here." He gave his imprint a cheesy grin.
Kim, Leah, Seth, and Collin went about the typical things they were thankful for—each other, their health, their jobs, whatever. Paul, who was just about drunk off his ass, sentimentally said he was thankful for his friends and family. He was also thankful for Sam and Emily housing him for the past two days. Brady was thankful for just being able to show up.
Once it was Quil's turn, everybody groaned.
"Hey, hey," he said. "Calm down. I'm not about to take forever."
"Just tell us what you're thankful for," Kim said.
"I'm thankful for my family," Quil said genuinely, "who I rap about on my new mixtape, which dropped last month. Nobody really bought it, though—"
"It was on SoundCloud," Leah pointed out curtly.
"Anyways," Quil continued, "I am thankful for you guys. Real shit. In fact, on track eight—"
Ding-dong!
The table at large (minus Seth) all simultaneously said, "I'll get it." Collin was the quickest, though. He hopped out of his chair and went to the front door.
Everybody had already resumed eating their food when Collin enthusiastically said, "Hey, Rachel!"
Paul audibly choked.
Rachel entered the dining room, smiling brightly. She greeted everybody. Jacob didn't mind seeing his sister. It had been a while. He got up to hug her and everything. Just about everybody got up to hug her, minus Paul, who stayed planted in his chair with a shocked expression.
It almost hurt him to see her because he loved her that much. As complicated as they were, he was entirely enamored with her. She was his imprint, after all, and regardless, she looked better than ever. He hadn't seen her in three months. She was glowing. He was all warm inside, and it wasn't entirely because of the alcohol.
Once Rachel was done greeting everybody, she turned to Paul with a smirk and a slight cock of her head. "Hey, Paul," she said quietly.
"H-h-hey, Rach," he stuttered timidly.
Rachel set a glass pan covered with foil down on the table wherever there was space. She peeled part of the foil back, revealing a sweet potato casserole.
"Oh my God, Rach," Embry said, a little more drunk than before. "You didn't have to bring that. You're so sweet."
"How could I just show up without cooked food?" she asked, pulling up a chair to sit in the corner of the table, just between Paul and Brady.
"You'd be surprised," Emily told her, her expression noticeably disappointed as she gestured to the various snack foods and pizza boxes on the table.
The air was kind of tense after Emily said that.
"Hey, Rach," Leah said cheerily, trying to save the mood, "we were all just going around the table saying what we're thankful for. You should tell us what you'rethankful for."
"Oh," Rachel said. She turned to Paul, and then back to the rest of the table. "Well, I'd just like to say that I'm thankful for the fact that I'm pregnant with a healthy baby." She smiled warmly.
Paul's plastic fork clanked to the table and his jaw dropped. All around the table were surprised—nearly terrified—expressions. Everybody had gone silent.
"By who?" Paul asked incredulously.
"Who do you think?" Rachel asked him, her smile long gone as she furrowed her brow and narrowing her eyes.
The rest of the dinner was really awkward after that, to say the least.
The guests gravitated back to the living room while Sam, Brady, and Collin cleaned up and put the leftovers away. Emily, who managed to drink even more over the course of the rest of dinner, wasn't in the best shape, toxicity wise.
She and Leah sat in a couple chairs in the back corner of the room. Emily was drunk-crying. She had red eyes, a little bit of snot, all the works. Leah stared at her sympathetically, with a sad smile on her face. She wasn't exactly sure how to comfort her.
"Everything is going wrong," Emily sobbed, sniffling as her tears fell onto the reindeer on her hideous sweater. "I cooked so much but people still ate the tortilla chips and Gogurts, all Quil can talk about is his stupid mixtape, and nobody is even wearing an ugly Christmas sweater. I just feel like nobody understands how fucking hard I've been working to make this party happen, Lee."
"Oh, Em," Leah said compassionately. "I mean, the turkey was a little dry, but we still appreciate you."
Emily covered her eyes and sobbed even harder, letting her head fall.
Leah pulled her into a gentle hug and stroked her hair. "Oh, Emily," she said quietly. "You're not even doing a bad job. You're such a good host. Plus, it's not even over yet. We still have the gift exchange."
"And the worst part," Emily continued, "is that I'm fucking engaged and I didn't get to tell anyone because dinner was such a shit show!" She held up her left hand, where a tiny but obvious diamond ring sat on her fourth finger.
Leah gasped. "Oh my God," she said.
Emily nodded, tears still running down her face. "Yeah."
Leah pulled her in for a tight hug. "Congratulations," she told her. "It's about time he proposed to you."
"You think so?" Emily asked gently.
"It's only been seventy fucking years," Leah said. She let her go and then smiled, wiping away her cousin's tears. "You're doing just fine, Em. I promise."
"I know what can make you feel better, Emily," Quil chimed in all of a sudden.
"Nobody wants to hear about your mixtape, Quil," Leah snapped at him. "Your fucking SoundCloud mixtape."
"I was just gonna offer her a drink, Lee," Quil said quietly, his tone offended. "No need to be rude as shit."
"No, Leah's got a point," Jacob said. He was standing against the wall next to the kitchen. "You should give it a rest, Quil."
Nobody really disagreed with Jacob and Leah, but nobody really agreed with Quil, either.. They all just stared at Jacob.
"See, you guys are fake as hell," Quil said. "Track eleven is all about fake people—"
"Give it a rest," Jacob repeated.
Quil stalked off to the refrigerator as if he hadn't just eaten.
Thank you, Leah mouthed to Jacob.
Embry lightened the mood by putting on music that wasn't recorded by Quil. He hooked up his phone to Sam's speakers, and the vibe of the house was less tense and more hip-hop.
Just about everybody ended up sitting around in the living room area, chatting. Paul and Rachel were in the corner, in the middle of a serious conversation about her—their—baby. She was just over three months along, and he was trying very, very hard not to freak out.
The others were catching up some more, talking about what they were doing with their lives as young adults did. Everybody was doing their own thing—work, school, internships, grad school, more work. All away from La Push. Leah resided in California, of course. Quil and Embry stayed in Seattle, as well as Kim and Jared, but in very different neighborhoods. Seth went to college in Pullman, which was damn near in Idaho. Paul had been doing whatever the fuck in Arizona, and he had a baby on the way. And Sam and Emily… well, they were full-fledged adults now, engaged and everything.
The only people who stayed in La Push were Collin and Brady because they had to. They were in high school. They were happy to be there, anyway, as well as Sam and Emily.
Jacob was just… there. Unhappy and unmoving. He wanted to use every excuse in the book, but he couldn't run away from the fact that he had stayed in La Push because he had always hoped Leah would come back (as well as the fact that he was just plain stubborn).
And she was back now, momentarily, and he felt as stupid as ever.
Jacob was stuck in his own head by the time Seth tapped him on the shoulder. "What about you, Jake?" he asked with a warm smile. "What have you been up to lately?"
"I've just been around," he admitted casually. "You know, working. I've been doing patrols every now and then, too."
While the group's general attention hadn't entirely been on Jacob, anyway, it certainly was now. He was faced with multiple perturbed expressions. Even Paul and Rachel had gotten out of their little bubble of stress to worriedly stare at him.
"You're still phasing?" Paul asked him.
It all made sense to Jacob now. The lone, quiet patrols he'd been doing for years. The fact that he was the only one who felt physically warm anymore.
His eyes scanned over various faces, all slightly more aged that he remembered, but still aged nonetheless.
I'm the only one who's still fucking phasing, he realized.
Jacob looked back to Seth. "Even you?" he asked, his tone a mixture of pain and surprise.
Seth just nodded, his lips pressed together tightly.
Leah opened her mouth to begin to say something, but because the party had been full of awkward pauses and even more awkward surprises, Emily made a swift effort to make things less awful.
"It's time for the Secret Santa," she announced cheerily as she got off the couch. She quickly plucked the dingy Santa hat from Paul's head and put it on her own.
"Hey!" Paul protested.
"Don't worry, you'll get it back afterward," she told him with a mischievous smile.
Embry was turning down the music as Emily kneeled in front of the Christmas tree. She took the first gift she saw—it was flat and obviously a card that was just wrapped up.
"Alright," she said, reading the label. "This one here is for Brady."
Brady unwrapped the present, which was, naturally, a Christmas card. When he opened it, a $50 Amazon gift card fell out of it.
"Oh, cool!" he said. "Who's this from?"
Leah smiled at him and Jacob just about melted. "It's from me," she told Brady.
"Aww, thanks."
"No problem, kid."
Emily picked up the next present, which was for Sam. He unwrapped it to find a box with a mug in it. The red mug said in big white letters, "World's Greatest Grandpa." Inside of the mug were two tiny bottles of Hennessy.
"Ha, ha," Sam said dryly. He looked to Quil. "Was this you?"
Quil grinned. "You know it, gramps."
Some of the gifts in the exchange were thoughtful. Collin had gotten Jared a nice pair of headphones, Jared had gotten Embry the entire series of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air on DVD, Embry had gotten Seth a pair of Timbs, and Seth had gotten Quil a recording microphone and a bunch of blank CDs. Kim had gotten Jacob a pack of socks, which he was grateful for, even if it wasn't entirely thoughtful.
Other gifts weren't that thoughtful at all. Sam had gotten Kim an old Miley Cyrus CD because he didn't know much about her besides the fact that she had liked "Party in the USA" back when it first came out. Kim still graciously accepted the CD, though.
Collin, on the other hand, didn't know how to graciously accept the fake Timbs that Paul had gotten him. He compared his boots to the ones that Embry had gotten Seth, because while they had both come in Timberland boxes and were roughly the same color, Collin's boots were… off. He knew that Paul wanted to flex a little, though, and he already wasn't having the best day, so Collin didn't say anything.
Regardless of the amount of thought that was put into the gifts, though, the single reaction that took the cake of the Secret Santa gift exchange was Paul's. Brady had gotten him a three-pack of phone chargers, which Paul needed more than anything since he'd spent the entire party asking someone if he could borrow their charger. From then on, Paul guarded his new chargers like his life depended on them.
"Hey, man," Quil approached him. "My phone's on, like, three percent. Can I use one of your chargers real quick?"
Paul quickly clutched his packet of chargers close to his chest and gave Quil a bewildered look. "Stay back with your broke ass."
Quil scoffed and went off to ask somebody else about borrowing a charger.
Night had since fallen by the time the gift exchange ended, and the music got turned up again.
As alienated as Jacob felt from his pack, he could still admit that they could really have fun when they wanted to. Watching everybody dance and sing to throwback hip-hop songs was a trip—it was like the college party experience he never had. While he could live without seeing Kim break off Jared ever again, it was still kind of fun seeing everyone else have a good time.
Over a noisy combination of music and chatter, Seth asked Emily, "Who got you for the Secret Santa?"
Emily just waved it off. "It's okay, I don't want anything."
"That's so sad," Leah said to Seth. She wanted to mention how she hadn't gotten a gift, either, and that Jacob hadn't given anybody a gift at all.
Leah glanced at Jacob from the other side of the room. Near the window, standing near Embry, he looked like he was just about having an existential crisis. Jacob was having a rough time at this party. Maybe even a more rough time than Paul, who was still in shock at his predicament with Rachel.
"Paul, you didn't get me anything for Christmas?" Rachel asked him, sounding genuinely upset as they sat on the couch.
Paul grimaced in return. "I got you pregnant."
"Here ya go, Rach," Quil said, his speech slightly slurred as he handed her a CD in a paper sleeve before she could protest it. He had at least fifteen other copies with him, too. "I've got stocking stuffers for everybody."
"Thanks?" Rachel said to him confusedly, unwilling yet grateful of the gift.
Since everybody was over shunning Quil for his unashamed promotion of his mixtape (especially since he wouldn't stop, anyway), everybody accepted a copy.
"I told him not to do it," Embry said to nobody in particular.
Sam tossed his CD aside and wrapped his arm around Emily's shoulders. "Babe, did you still wanna take a picture with everybody in it?"
Despite the party being a shitshow for the most part, Emily was still determined to get one fond memory out of it. "Yeah, of course."
"I'll go get the camera."
Sam returned with his digital camera just as Emily was rounding everybody up to stand in front of the Christmas tree. Quil was drunk enough that he had a hard time getting up, but Jacob kept a sturdy grip on him.
"Alright," Emily said. "There's a bunch of you guys and most of you are over six feet tall. Some of y'all are gonna have to get down in front."
Seth, Collin, Jared, Kim, Embry, and Quil all kneeled down, leaving the rest of them in the back. Jacob found himself next to Leah. She looked and smelled like heaven, and it made Jacob want to be swallowed up by the earth.
He felt like such an asshole—her Christmas gift was literally in his left pocket, but he had been too chicken to put it under the tree, let alone give it to her. He had managed to convince himself that the gift was stupid and he never should have RSVP'd to this party. All he wanted to say was sorry. Sorry for being a dickhead to Leah when she had first arrived, sorry for being a dickhead now, sorry for not knowing how to act at all when it came to her.
Fuck it, he told himself. Just say it. Say you're sorry.
He turned to her. "Leah, I'm—"
"Everybody, say 'cheese'!" Emily exclaimed. She turned to Rachel, who was the only one not in front of the tree. "Get in the picture, Rach," she said, almost like it was a threat.
"I'm not gonna argue with you anymore, Em," Rachel said, her arms crossed over her chest. "Give me the camera so you can get in the picture. You deserve it."
Emily sighed and handed the digital camera over. "Here." Then she moved to the far left side of the tree.
Rachel held up the camera. "Say 'cheese'!"
A chorus of "Cheese!" with Quil exaggerating the single syllable followed. Rachel took a few more pictures by Emily's request. The second they were done, something must have come over Paul because he rushed to Rachel with lightning speed. (It was probably the imprint.) It almost made Jacob want to throw up.
"Look, Rach," he said, taking her by the hands. "I'm sorry for being a dick about the whole baby thing."
"No, you're not," she replied to him.
"Yes, I am," he said. "I've been a dick lately, and I'm also sorry for being so distant, trying to figure shit out in Arizona."
She looked at him dubiously. "What did you figure out?"
"That I belong here in Washington, with you and the—our—baby. It's only what's right."
"Well, in that case, I'm sorry about how I told everyone. I could have at least told you in private."
"You've got that right," Paul scoffed.
Rachel pursed her lips at him, and he beamed at her, causing her to beam right back and kiss him briefly.
It almost made Jacob think he'd never imprint. Then he realized Paul was going to be the father of his future niece or nephew.
Fuck.
The rest of the party began to wind down after that. Jacob didn't want to lose whatever guts he had gained in order to talk to Leah, so he forced himself to be brave. Leah wasn't his imprint or his girlfriend or anything, but she still deserved better. She always deserved better. It was why she'd left him, after all.
He found her by the window next to front door. She was leaned against the wall, using her cell phone. She looked beyond done with the party.
"Hey," Jacob said. "What are you up to?"
So far, so good, Black.
She looked up at him with her big brown eyes, framed by thick, dark lashes. "Ordering an Uber," she told him. "It's gonna be a bitch, though."
"Why's that?"
She nodded her head to the window. "It's snowing and it's probably gonna stick."
Jacob peered through the space in the curtains. "Oh, shit, no way," he said. "We usually don't get snow until January."
"Yeah," Leah said. "I haven't seen snow in years. I've spent all my last few Christmases at the beach." Her tone was nostalgic, as if she still didn't live in Long Beach and wasn't only visiting La Push now.
"You must miss California more than ever, huh?" Jacob asked.
She shrugged. "A little bit," she told him. "It's not every day that I get to hear Quil bug me about his mixtape or Paul asking for a charger."
Jacob chuckled. "Yeah, they're jackasses."
Leah smiled back. "But what's new, ya know?"
They both smiled for a little bit, but it faded into the cool awkwardness that had clouded them over the course of this entire party.
"I'm sorry," they both said at the same time.
"What are you sorry for?" she asked him.
"For…" He could hardly believe he was finally getting to this. "For not being enough. For pushing you to move away. And I'm so fucking sorry for the comment I made earlier about your ass. I was so nervous I couldn't think straight."
"Jacob, that was so long ago," she said, her tone surprisingly understanding. "If anything, I should be the sorry one. I mean, I'm the one who left without saying anything. I'd be beyond pissed at me if I were you." She looked off for a moment, looking kind of upset.
"I'm not pissed," Jacob admitted, shaking his head. "I just wanted an explanation. That's all."
"I… I just…" Leah faltered. "Ugh. I didn't wanna get stuck here. I loved what we had, for the most part, but… Jake, I just didn't wanna rot here in La Push."
"Like me," he finished.
"I didn't say that."
His tone was curt. "But that's what you meant."
Leah's gaze fell somewhere behind Jacob, and he turned around. It was Kim and Jared.
"Hey, guys," Kim said slightly uneasily, like she knew she was intruding on something, "but we're gonna head out before the snow gets even worse."
"Oh, already?" Leah asked, pulling her into a hug as Jared pulled Jacob into a hug. "Have a safe drive. Make sure to text me."
"Of course, Lee," Kim replied.
Kim and Jared switched, hugging Jacob and Leah, respectively, and then they left. The ice cold air from outside flooded inside to Jacob and Leah within moments.
There it was. Another awkward pause. Leah hadn't wanted to be stuck at all, but she and Jacob were sure as hell stuck now.
She glanced down at her cell phone and then back at him. "My Uber's almost here," she said. "I'm gonna go say goodbye to everyone."
She retreated to the living room, and Jacob figured he might as well head out soon, too. He was glad he finally talked to Leah, but he just wished things could go well for him for once in his sad-ass life. Just one thing would be amazing.
Upon entering the living room, he saw that Paul was still being territorial of his new cell phone chargers.
"Come on, Paul," Embry said, exasperated. "My phone's at, like, thirty percent and I gotta drive all the way back to Seattle. Let me just charge my phone for twenty minutes."
"Go on low power mode or something," Paul said dismissively.
"Man, fuck you."
Jacob interrupted them to quickly say goodbye, and that he hoped Embry found a way to charge his phone. He did his rounds throughout the living room, hugging everybody goodbye. He got kind of sad. Even though a few of them lived in La Push just like he did, it wouldn't be the same. It hadn't been the same since they had all been a pack.
Now Jacob was just a pack of one. He had dropped from alpha to omega.
Something has to change.
By the time Jacob got outside, Leah seemed to already be gone. He had thought he missed his chance until he noticed a figure a few meters away from the driveway, standing underneath the large snowflakes swirling around her.
She was still here.
Because it was Jacob's last chance, he went to her. Catching snowflakes in his eyes and hair, he went to her.
"Leah," he said. Then he reached into his pants pocket for her gift. "I want you to have this."
He handed her a small, square, black box.
"What is this?" she asked him.
"Open it."
"I'm gonna beat your ass if this is—"
"Just open it."
She opened up the box, and inside of it was a gold plated necklace. On it was a little rectangle with her name etched into it in cursive.
"Jacob, it's beautiful," she said sentimentally. "Thank you."
The headlights of the Uber then pulled up to the house. "I have to go," she told him with a sad smile. "Goodbye, Jacob."
"Goodbye, Leah."
He watched her leave him, leave his life all over again. And she watched him, too, from the backseat of the Uber. She stared at him until he was merely a dark speck against the white snow.
She looked down at the necklace. It really was beautiful. All she could do was rub the smooth cursive letters in the metal. Then she felt something etched into the back of it, as well. She flipped it over, curious.
Engraved into the back of the necklace was the Quileute tribe emblem. It was the exact tattoo that she shared with her pack.
She was so fascinated with the detail in the necklace itself that she hadn't noticed the tiny note inside the box it had come in until it fell out onto her lap.
She unfolded it, and in Jacob's scratchy handwriting, it said: So you don't forget your roots.
She instinctively held the necklace to her heart.
I won't, Jacob. I won't.
Epilogue
A few days following the party, Jacob was sitting at the desk in his room surfing the Internet when an email notification popped up in the bottom right corner of the screen. It was from Embry, and it had been sent out to the group chat at large.
Jacob clicked on the message and the subject line read: Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
Below the subject line, Embry had attached one of the pictures they had taken that night with Photoshopped ugly Christmas sweaters on all who hadn't been wearing one that night. They looked like a real family, together and home for the holidays—happy and appreciative to be around one another as shown in everybody's smiles.
There was a string of replies from various people saying how good of a job Embry did, as well as one reply from Quil saying he had "waaaaay too much free time." At the end, there was a reply from Emily.
Thank you so much, Embry! I love it.
Jacob smiled to himself as he saved the picture to his hard drive. Just as the download finished, he got another email notification.
It was from Leah.
Fin