A/N: I'm in the tragedy mood today so I'm writing depressing oneshots to keep me in that mood because I love tragic things.
The First of November
It is the first of November, the day after Lily and James Potter were murdered. I am dressed in my best black suit, though it is still patched up and ragged. I don't think James or Lily would have minded though. Their dead now anyways. Killed by Lord Voldemort. My two other best friends aren't here with me and it makes everything ten times worse. Sirius has become a murderer and Peter, murdered by Sirius.
The others try to comfort me, but their soft words don't reach my heart. I have no one. I am alone.
They are lowering the caskets now. Side by side. They go slowly into the frozen earth together and I want to go with them. I want to die so I can be with them again. The knife is in my pocket. The point of it pricks my finger, but I don't even wince. I can't feel any pain now that I've died inside.
The others leave and only the traitor, Severus Snape and I remain. He looks awful, kneeling at Lily's grave, bitter tears dripping from the end of his long, hooked nose. He knows I'm still there, but he doesn't pay any attention.
I take out the knife and position it by the left side of my chest, where my hardened heart now lies. I'm ready for it and I don't think twice. The day I have to bury my friends, should be the day I die as well. When I go to plunge it into my heart, it is torn from my hands by some magical force. I look around. Snape is holding it in his hand.
"They would want you to live," Snape said.
"You know nothing, you filthy bastard," I said.
"You know it's true."
"You really did love her didn't you?"
Snape wiped the end of his nose with his sleeve. "You are to tell no one."
I nodded and took the knife back. I stabbed it into the ground between Lily and James' graves, where it rusted and sunk into the ground over time. The death of my friends took a great toll on me and I was never again the same person.