Valentine's Day SucksTwice

by Danny vs A Month

Finn really hates holidays and the fact that he's the only one in Ooo that practices most doesn't help. WARNING: mixed happy and sad ending.

I do not own Adventure Time or any of the characters. I own Finn's new Axe-guitar and use of kunai knives. I own Finn's outfit and high school ring.

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Valentine's Day Sucks...Twice

Finn hated holidays. His birthday was sad because nowadays the only person there was him. Christmas was bad because he always got called away to fight something no matter who he was celebrating it with. Usually that was Marceline since she was the only one that knew all of the old traditions. Halloween was bad because the only costume any store sold was a human costume. All the other species were so abundant that it would be disrespectful. All of the minor holidays were bad because Finn was the only one that they meant anything too. He was human so they were a part of his species' history. Marceline said she gave up on them so he usually just sat in his house and imagined that the entire world was human.

The worst holiday, by far, was Valentine's Day. It was the only day that every species got along on and that every species celebrated the exact same way. Everyone that was in a relationship would go on a date with their partner. Everyone else would go get drunk and tell their friends all of their romance stories even though half were complete lies. Their friends usually knew because they heard the story in a different way every year but they were all drunk so they didn't care. Princess Bubblegum was married to the only prince in all of Ooo and always went on and on about how great Valentine's day was for her. Finn was beyond thankful that she didn't go into excessive detail. Even Marceline somehow found someone knew to go on a date with every year. The only problem with her way of celebrating was that her father killed all but one of them. The only one he hadn't killed had been so scared by her father that he had jumped off of a cliff into the Fire Kingdom less than an hour after the date ended. Flame Princess had gotten married to Flambo right after Flambo killed her father so that he didn't kill her.

Finn got off his bed and walked toward the wall. He meant to punch it to let out stress but stopped when a section of the roof collapsed in front of him. He glared at it for a minute then got his tools and put it back into place. His tree house was dying and Finn was no good at fixing it. Jake had been better at it but he and Lady Rainicorn had moved to the crystal dimension right after their marriage. They were immortal there so Jake still looked exactly the same even though Finn was now eighteen. Finn had started hating the holidays right after he and Jake had found the miniature versions of themselves. Finn had found out that it was the Magic Man so he had gone to the Magic Man's house and had tied the Magic Man to his ceiling then had gone home.

"Stupid Martin Luther King Jr. Day," Finn grumbled as he climbed back into his house through the window. "Stupid humanity. Stupid Ooo. Stupid Life! STUPID JAKE!"

When he yelled Jake's name, he threw a picture of him and Jake with their family at the wall. The picture cracked and the wall smashed. Finn slammed his fist on the top of the coffee table and that smashed too. Finn put a piece of wood over the hole in the wall and nailed it there then laid on his back on the couch and put his arm over his head. He hated his house and he hated the fact that it could easily fit fifty people comfortably and he had to live there alone. He almost didn't hear the tiny footsteps approaching him. He looked up and saw Beemo walking toward him with a nervous look on his face.

"Oh, hey Beemo," Finn said. "I haven't seen you in a while."

Beemo coughed and his screen went fuzzy then came back into focus and he smiled a tiny bit.

"I've been charging," Beemo said. "I can barely hold a charge for fifteen minutes these days."

"Is there anything I can do?" Finn asked.

"No," Beemo said. "I'm just old. I just wanted to say that I got a message that Jake is coming over to visit. I don't think you would want him to come in in the middle of one of your fits."

"Thanks for the warning Beemo," Finn said. "Go plug in before you shut down."

"It won't help," Beemo said. "My hard drive's fried. I've got about another five minutes with or without charging. I want to see Jake one more time before I lose power."

Just then the door opened and Jake walked in. Jake seemed to be on top of the world and that just seemed to tick Finn off. Jake didn't notice and saw Beemo and ran over to hug him. Then he turned and shook Finn's hand.

"Good to see you too, Bro," Finn said.

Jake winced and turned away. Him and Jake had gotten into a fight the last time he was there and in the end they had both wished they had never met the other and Jake had stormed out. Finn regretted it but the fight had started because Jake had been ragging on Finn for letting their house fall apart. It wasn't Finn's fault that the only thing Jake had ever taught him was to fight and shop.

Finn walked into the other room and got his small weapons pouch. He set it on the couch and sat next to it then pulled out several kunai knives and began cleaning and sharpening them. Finn had lost quite a bit of his morals over the years and was no longer above killing unaligned people or torturing anything he had to to find out information. He had started torturing the one and only time Marceline had lost a fight. It was against the Lich so Finn hadn't been able to gloat. He wouldn't have anyway given the fact that when he got there, Marceline was traumatized. She had cried so much that she was in a state that was similar to shock but was much worse.

"The place looks like crap," Jake said pulling Finn back to the present and away from the memory of finding Marceline, broken and on the verge of tears, in the Lich's dungeon.

"Well maybe if you would stop complaining about it and fix it, it would look better," Finn said through clenched teeth while pressing so hard on the blade of a kunai with the cleaning cloth that he was cutting his fingers and spreading fresh blood on the blade.

"I told you last time," Jake said through clenched teeth. "It's not my house anymore, it's yours. You fix it!"

"You're right," Finn said throwing his knife into the floor and turning on Jake with all the rage he had been restraining for days. "IT'S NOT YOUR HOUSE ANYMORE! STOP COMPLAINING THAT IT'S A DUMP! I LIVE HERE! I KNOW IT'S A DUMP! IT'S DYING! IF YOU WANT IT TO LOOK GOOD, BRING IT BACK TO LIFE!"

"DON'T YOU YELL AT ME!" Jake shouted. "IT'S NOT MY FAULT THAT EVERY GIRL YOU'VE EVER HAD A CRUSH ON HAS REJECTED YOU AND MARRIED EITHER SOME POMPUS JERK THAT THINKS HE'S BETTER THAN EVERYONE OR ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS! I DIDN'T INVENT HOLIDAYS! I'M NOT THE ONE THAT DECIDED YOU SHOULDN'T GO TO THE PRISON KINGDOM WITH MOM AND DAD THE DAY THEY DIED! BUT I DO WISH YOU HAD SO THAT I WOULDN'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOU!"

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Finn shouted. "AND IF I EVER SEE YOU HERE AGAIN, YOU'LL FIND YOURSELF IN A PINE BOX SO FAST YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO SAY EVERYTHING BURRITO!"

Jake looked hurt and remorseful at the same time. He took a step back then turned and left. He slammed the door behind him and Beemo just sat there with a blank screen.

"You still online Beemo?" Finn asked.

Beemo didn't answer so Finn picked him up and put him on a shelf next to a picture of Jake and Finn that was taken after they had gone fishing. Finn was holding a fish as big as him and Jake was holding twelve that were all twice as big as Finn. Finn picked up the picture and threw it against the floor as hard as he could. The frame exploded and Finn tore the picture to shreds. Then he got all of his weapons and walked outside. He threw a Molotov in through the window and watched as the fire shot through the tree and burned everything he owned to the ground. After a moment he turned away and shifted his pack then began walking.

He had traded his old outfit for a set of black Tee-shirts, black cargo pants, black Converse All Stars, and a black book bag. He had gone through high school in a year and twelve years of college in three years. He had gotten a class ring from each but only wore his high school ring. He had gotten it enchanted to that when he wore it he could throw a kunai knife from a thousand feet away and still get a dead center bull's eye. The ring was silver with an emerald stone and had an engraving on the inside. It was the name of the only person that Finn knew would always accept him.

"Now where do I go?" Finn asked himself.

He suddenly heard Martin Luther King Jr.'s voice and remembered what day it was. His mood instantly got darker and he began walking west. He had no idea where he was going but knew that if all else failed at least he could take over the abandoned Ice castle. The Ice King had gotten his memories back and had destroyed the crown. Then he had left Ooo in search of a place called England in which he could die in peace.

"Man," Finn said. "Why can't I just find a human like me? Then at least I would have someone to hang out with. Why does Jake have to be such a jerk. I never did anything to him."

Before Finn realized where he was he was inside the Ice castle. He sat in the Ice King's recliner and looked around. It was cold and he would need a jacket but aside from that he supposed he could live with it. He got up and started putting his stuff into their new places but before he was a fourth of the way done Marceline arrived. He knew she was there before she was even inside the Castle. She sneaked up behind him and was about to tackle him but he stepped sideways and she wound up on the bed. Finn kept unpacking and she glared at him until she remembered that it was a holiday.

"What is it with you and being angry on holidays?" Marceline asked.

"Have you ever thought you were the absolute last of your kind?" Finn asked without any emotion in his voice and without looking at her. "It doesn't feel good. I'm the only person that the holidays have anything to do with."

"No you're not," Marceline said. "Christmas is famous. St Patrick's Day is famous. Valentine's Day-"

"Is the worst idea in history," Finn said. "It has no purpose."
"That's what this is about," Marceline said. "It's almost Valentine's Day and you're still single because every girl in Ooo has a boyfriend."
"Who's yours?" Finn asked.
"I don't need one," Marceline said. "I'm perfectly capable of getting any boy I want for a boyfriend."
"Goody goody for you," Finn said.
"You're not the only one that has a history with holidays," Marceline said. "I used to be human before I became a vampire."
Finn froze for a moment then continued to unpack.
"Doesn't matter," Finn said. "You still have a species that you belong to. My species died out a long time ago. I'm just too stubborn to finish it."
"Don't say that!" Marceline said. "That's a terrible thing to say! Why would you kill yourself?"
"I have nothing to live for," Finn said. "All of my friends have dropped out of contact except you. You basically only hang out with me on Christmas for about a half hour before I have to go kill something. My brother just told me he wished that I had died with the rest of our family."
"What?" Marceline asked. "Why would he say that?"
"He and I haven't been getting along since he left," Finn said putting the last of his stuff away. "I guess I'm a terrible brother now that I can't keep our tree alive."
"Your tree's dying?" Marceline asked.
"It died," Finn said. "Then it caught fire."
"That explains why you're here," Marceline said. "I'm sorry about your tree."
"It's fine," Finn said.
He pulled out his phone and set it next to his father's sword then sat in the recliner. No sooner was he sitting than his phone began to go off.
"Right on schedule," Finn said.
He picked up the phone and answered it.
"Hello?" Finn asked. "Uh-huh...I understand...okay...Be there in about five minutes."

"What's wrong?" Marceline asked.

"There's a hug wolf in the goblin village," Finn said.

"Don't they think you're their king?" Marceline asked.

"They found out who it was and forgot about me ever being king," Finn said. "Now I get to save them again."

"By doing what?" Marceline asked.

Finn didn't answer but picked up his root sword and left. Marceline went to the window and watched as he walked to the Goblin Kingdom. It wasn't very far away and within five minutes Finn was there. About a minute later she saw him walk out of the Goblin city with a hug wolf head on the end of his sword. He stabbed the sword into the ground and walked back to the Ice Kingdom.

"Harsh," Marceline said when Finn walked in.

"Easy," Finn said.

"What if it was one of your old friends?" Marceline asked. "Or Lumpy Space Princess?"

"Top drawer," Finn said.

Marceline opened it and instantly closed it again. Inside was a wolf's head that was purple and fuzzy with a deformed star on the forehead. The head itself looked like it had about fifteen huge tumors and was very deformed.

"You killed LSP?" Marceline asked.

"She turned into a werewolf," Finn said matter-of-factly.

"You don't regret it do you?" Marceline asked.

"Nope," Finn said. "Third drawer."

Marceline opened the drawer and her mouth fell open. There was a bunch of different pictures in it and under them was a pile of bloody crowns. The only two missing were Princess Bubblegum's and Flame Princess's. Even Ghost Princess's crown was in the drawer.

"You killed them all?" Marceline asked.

"Yes," Finn said. "They all turned into monsters and attacked a village so I killed them all."

Marceline took a step back then flew out of the Ice Kingdom. Finn smirked and picked up the plastic crowns. They were all covered in corn syrup and Finn was planning to use them to make a haunted house. He only needed to finish the dead bodies. Then he would be able to scare the crap out of anyone that went in. Lumpy Space Princess's head was real but she had regrown her head and went back to normal after he had removed it. About fifteen minutes later Finn heard something hit the ice floor and got three kunai and slipped them into the sleeve of the sweatshirt he had put on. After a moment he turned and threw one kunai. It stuck into the wall about a centimeter in front of the intruder. It was Susan Strong. Finn hadn't seen her in a long time and was glad she was there. She had stopped wearing her hood and now Finn knew that she had a human head but had gills on the sides of her neck.

"Hey Susan," Finn said as she gave back his kunai.

"Hello Finn," Susan said. "How are you?"

"Okay," Finn said. "I just want today to be over."

"What do you do for a job?" Susan asked.

"I'm a hero," Finn said. "Don't you remember?"

"Oh, um," Susan said. "Yeah. Um, have you made up with Jake for threatening to kill him?"

Finn knew something was off and was glad he still had two kunai in his sleeve.

"No," Finn said standing and turning away from her. "I haven't seen him yet. When I do I'm going to put a hole in his head. I guess for now I'll just had to start by doing this."

He glanced at Susan who seemed to be searching through his things for something. Finn threw the kunai she knew about and it stuck a centimeter from her hand as she reached for his father's sword. She turned toward him and he held up another kunai.

"Sit," Finn said pointing at a chair.

She did and Finn tied her down. Susan could have broken out just by standing, but she clearly wasn't Susan.

"So Susan," Finn said. "When did you learn to talk without your usual disability?"

"I...um...you...uh," Susan stammered.

"More importantly," Finn said. "How did you know about my fight with Jake if you weren't there? It was just me and him."

"Not quite," Susan said with a different but just as familiar voice.

"Of course it's you," Finn said. "It would have to be you. You were Marceline too weren't you?"

"Yes," Susan said with the same voice. "You're very observant around Susan but not Marceline."

"I know the difference between you and Marceline," Finn said. "For one, I wouldn't hear her coming."

"That's what she said," Susan said.

"That would actually be a 'That's what he said' joke," Finn corrected.

"Not if you like watching reverse swingers," Susan said grinning.

"Pervert," Finn said. "So why do you want my father's sword?"

"It unlocks the final seal," Susan said.

"And when that happens?" Finn asked.

"The Lich and his son both return and finish what the Lich started centuries ago," Susan said.

"Then I guess I won't be losing my sword will I?" Finn asked.

"Not now," Susan said.

Susan disappeared and Finn sighed. Then he picked up his sword and sat on the bed. Then Marceline flew in and he smirked.

"Hey Mar Mar," Finn said.

"Hi Finn," Marceline said.

Finn threw a kunai at Marceline and she ducked under it.

"What was that for?" Marceline asked.

"I told you I can tell the difference between you and her," Finn said.

Marceline glared at him then jumped out of the Ice Castle and ran off. Finn watched her go then turned in time for the real Marceline to pin him to the floor. Finn struggled but there was no way he could get away from her.

"Nice to see you too," Finn said.

"You sound like you're in an uncharacteristically good mood for it being a holiday," Marceline said. "Who are you and where's Finn?"

"Hilarious," Finn said. "Can I get up now?"

"No," Marceline said. "I love watching weaker species lay before me in worship."

"Ha ha," Finn said as Marceline let him up. "I just had a run in with a shape shifter."

"Cool," Marceline said. "How'd you know that I'm the real me?"

"I know you better than anyone," Finn said. "You could sneak up on an earclops without him knowing it."

"Good point," Marceline said. "Anything else?"

Finn shrugged but grinned evilly and pointed to the third drawer. Marceline opened it and whistled when she saw the crowns.

"Believable," Marceline said. "If I couldn't smell the difference between blood and corn syrup."

"Not to trick you," Finn said. "I'm making a haunted house for Halloween. I just need the bodies."

"Great idea," Marceline said. "I'll help."

Finn stared off into space for a moment then said, "I don't think that's a good Idea. I'm sorry."

"Why not?" Marceline asked.

Finn didn't answer so Marceline dropped the subject.

"What did the shape shifter want?" Marceline asked.

"My father's sword," Finn said. "To release the Lich and his son."

Marceline nodded and glanced at the sword. Then she began to cough. Finn raised an eyebrow until she began coughing up blood and he suddenly smelled garlic.

"Now what?" Finn said.

He put his sword over his back and picked up Marceline then jumped out the window and slid down the mountain. After about five minutes they came out of a barely visible cloud of garlic gas. Marceline slowly stopped coughing and Finn gently set her on the ground.

"Thank you," Marceline croaked.

"Of course," Finn said. "Can't let one of my few friends die in my house."

"Of course not," Marceline said. "That would make you look like a murderer."

"Right," Finn said.

Marceline smirked and coughed up some more blood. Finn couldn't smell garlic but decided it would be best to get Marceline home anyway. Finn picked her up again and carried her back to her house. When they got there Finn set Marceline of the table then got her a bottle of blood out of the fridge.

"Here," Finn said.

Marceline smirked at Finn then drained the bottle. She set it down and wiped off her blood mustache. Finn smirked this time and she gave him a questioning look. The moment she did his smile vanished and he looked confused.

"What's wrong?" Marceline asked.

"Didn't I have my father's sword on my back when we left the Ice Castle?" Finn asked.

Marceline looked and sure enough the sword was gone. He had put it through his back pack straps before he had picked her up. He still had his backpack but now his sword was gone.

"Magic maybe?" Marceline asked.

"That would mean that someone has my sword and they are probably working with the shape shifter," Finn said.

"I wouldn't worry about it too much," Marceline said. "I'm sure they won't actually help the Lich come back to life."

"Maybe you're right," Finn said.

Then he turned and walked outside. Marceline followed but by the time she was outside, Finn was sprinting back to the Ice Kingdom. She didn't know why and didn't care to find out just then. She knew who had the sword and why. It was Ash. He wanted to use the threat of bringing the Lich back to get her to go out with him.

"Great," Marceline said.

She flew to his house and kicked the door down then instantly covered her eyes. About a minute later three women ran by while finishing pulling their shirts on. When they were all gone Marceline uncovered her eyes and glared at Ash who had neglected to put his shirt back on.

"Well isn't this a surprise," Ash said.

"Don't even start Ash!" Marceline said. "We both know that you took Joshua's sword to get me to go out with you again!"

"How else was I supposed to do it?" Ash asked. "You wouldn't pass within a hundred meters of my house. Let alone talk to me."

"YOU SOLD HAMBO FOR A STUPID WAND!" Marceline screamed. "HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO REACT!?"

"Like that," Ash said. "But don't worry. I forgive you for breaking up with me and beating me up with that runt Finn."

Marceline glared at him and he just smirked and leaned his head toward a glass case on the wall. It held Joshua's sword and was protected by a magical barrier. There was a circle of runes glowing on the round part of the cross guard. It was the spell that would release the Lich but it wasn't complete. There was one more rune that should be there and Marceline knew that the only thing he had to do was say the last word.

"If you refuse, I finish the spell," Ash said. "And we both know what would happen to your precious Finn then."

"He's just my friend," Marceline said.

"Not anymore," Ash said. "Now he's just some stranger that you're never going to speak to again."

"No way," Marceline said.

"Panca-" Ash began.

"Okay!" Marceline said. "I'll do it."

"I know," Ash said. "Because you know that Finn could never defeat both the Lich and his son."

Marceline didn't say anything and didn't try to fight the tears running down her face. Ash smiled evilly and walked over to her.

"Oh come on," Ash said. "I'm not that bad. You put up with me for five hundred years."

"Those are the worst five hundred years of my life," Marceline said glaring at him.

"Wow," Ash said. "That human really did change you didn't he?"

"Yes," Marceline said. "He did. And I'm glad he did."

"Why's that?" Ash asked.

"Because he showed me how much of a...how much I hate you," Marceline said barely restraining a swear.

"Since when do you not swear?" Ash asked. "Don't tell me you're trying to be a better person for him."

"I'm christian," Marceline said. "My faith was restored because I prayed to be saved from the Lich and not only was I saved but Finn killed the Lich in under three minutes in a straight fight."

"Amazing," Ash said in slight annoyance at her level of respect for Finn. "Now, the first thing I want you to do as my girlfriend...is...um..."

"Don't hurt yourself," Marceline said.

"I see you still have a big mouth," Ash said. "Let's see you use it."

Marceline recoiled and Ash began to say the last part of the incantation. Before he could Marceline dropped to her knees and stared at the floor. She was crying again and Ash was finding himself having to restrain a laugh. He dropped his pants and pulled Marceline toward him.

About a half hour later Marceline was sitting on the roof of Ash's house crying her eyes out. Ash had always been a dirt bag but it was the first time he had ever actually raped her. Marceline wanted to erase her memories of the last hour just to be safe.

Ash suddenly stuck his head up through the skylight and smirked at her. She knew he was there but she ignored him.

"Okay Mar Mar," Ash said. "Time for you to make supper."

"Make it yourself," Marceline said.

"I don't think so," Ash said. "That's the girlfriend's job. Now get down there and make...me...SUPPER!"

Marceline cringed when he yelled and then obediently went downstairs and began making his favorite sandwich. She knew full well he wasn't going to make it that easy and she was right. When she gave him the sandwich he threw it in the trash then slapped her so hard she fell against the door frame.

"I don't want a sandwich," Ash said. "I want spaghetti."

Marceline cooked him spaghetti and when he got it he dumped a full bottle of garlic on it then threw it in Marceline's face. She screamed in pain and brushed the garlic off then received another, harder slap for screaming.

"I don't want spaghetti," Ash said. "I want wasabi."

"I can't make wasabi," Marceline said.

"Then you had better learn," Ash said shoving her into the kitchen.

Marceline knew that Ash was taking revenge for her breaking up with him. She was trying her hardest to not give him the satisfaction of breaking down in the middle of a task but was getting very close.

"I don't hear anything cooking!" Ash called from the living room. "And why is the TV off?"

"The remote's right in front of you," Marceline said.

"What, is it supposed to magically float from my legs into my hand?" Ash asked.

"You are a wizard," Marceline said.

"PAN-" Ash began.

Marceline slammed a pot to the floor and stormed over. She slapped the remote into his hand, pushed the power button, set it to his favorite channel then set the remote back on his legs and stormed back to the kitchen. She began to try to remember the recipe for wasabi and eventually managed to make a meatloaf. She walked into the living room and slammed the plate with the meatloaf onto the coffee table then cut it up for him and stuck the knife into the coffee table. Ash was less than impressed and slapped her harder than anytime before. She smashed into the TV and it exploded in a shower of sparks and Ash just got even more angry.

"YOU BROKE MY TV!" Ash shouted.

"You made me!" Marceline cried desperately.

Ash stood and walked over to her then punched her twelve times in the face and poured a bottle of garlic down her throat. She coughed it back up along with most of her lungs, throat, and stomach. When she finally stopped Ash kicked her in the ribs and broke three.

"I don't want meatloaf," Ash said. "I want my favorite sandwich."

Marceline pulled herself up on the arm of the sofa and dragged herself to the kitchen. Then she made him his sandwich and set it on the table in front of her. He glared at her and took a bite of his sandwich then spit it out then threw it away.

"That's disgusting," Ash said. "I've decided I'm not hungry. Go warm my bed up for me."

Marceline wordlessly began to make her way toward his room.

"When you have it nice and warm," Ash said. "You can go to sleep...for now."

Marceline went into his room and heated up some coals then put them in a bed warmer and put it under the mattress. When the bed was warm she went to her room and threw herself onto the bed. About fifteen minutes later Ash called for her. Marceline had been waiting for him too and went into his room.

"My bed's gone cold," Ash said. "Warm it back up for me."

"Would you like the match or the flamethrower?" Marceline asked.

"I choose...you," Ash said.

"I wasn't an option," Marceline said.

"No?" Ash asked. "Well now you are so get your perky, perfectly formed ass over here before I release your old friend the Lich."

Marceline glared at him and didn't move for a moment then her shoulders sunk and walked over. When she was within reach, Ash jumped out of the bed and threw her on the bed then tore her clothes off and chained her to the bed posts. Then he took his own clothes off and Marceline began to yank against her restraints. After a couple seconds Ash climbed onto the bed and raped Marceline again and again and again until the sun rose. When it did he finally unchained her arms and legs then threw her out of the bed and got in and instantly fell asleep.

Marceline smashed her head on his writing desk when he threw her off the bed and nearly blacked out. She swam on the edge of consciousness for a long time but finally woke up. She got up and saw that it was noon so she went downstairs and got an apple to eat. Before she could make herself drain it she put it back and went to the roof. She sat on the edge and hugged her knees to her chest then buried her head in her legs as she sobbed. After a little while she went inside and got dressed, and by the time she was done, Ash was awake.

"Hello Mar Mar," Ash said. "Go get me a new TV to replace the one you broke."

"From where?" Marceline asked.

"Don't care," Ash said.

"I have no money" Marceline said.

"Not my problem," Ash said.

Marceline went outside after putting on her hat and gloves then flew to the store. She found a TV exactly like Ash's and found a newer one. She knew he would actually leave her alone if she got him the newer one but also knew that the only way to get it was to steal it.

"Looking for a TV are you?" Choose Goose asked walking over. "This one is good too."

"I need this one but I have no money," Marceline said then muttered, "He might kill me if I don't bring him a TV."

"Price is no object," Choose Goose said. "I will give it to you for the reason of to protect."

Marceline hugged him then picked up the TV and flew back to Ash's house. She carefully set it where the other had been and took the old one to the dump then came back.

"You were gone awfully long," Ash said walking over to her. "Did you go see that loser?"

"No," Marceline said shaking.

"What?" Ash asked.

"No," Marceline said.

"What?" Ash asked.

"NO!" Marceline shouted.

Ash slapped her in the face and she fell sideways onto a knife and it came out through her heart. She stood pulled it out then dropped it and took a step away from Ash.

"I believe you," Ash said.

"Then why did you hit me?" Marceline asked.

"For taking too long," Ash said.

Marceline dropped her gaze to the floor and Ash turned back to the new TV and turned it on. Then he changed it to a football game and put his feet on the coffee table. Marceline glanced at the sword and considered stealing it and leaving.

"Don't try it Mar Mar," Ash said. "The magic barrier goes off like a bombing siren when it is broken without my okay."

Marceline went to the kitchen and got a bottle of blood and drank just enough to heal then put the rest back. Then she went to the roof and began to sob again. After about fifteen minutes she scrambled back and hid on the far side of the roof because she could see Finn storming up the path toward the house.

Finn knew that Ash had something to do with Marceline disappearing and refused to leave the house until he knew where she was. He kicked the door down and grabbed Ash by the front of the shirt and slammed her against the wall.

"WHERE IS SHE!?" Finn shouted.

"Who?" Ash asked innocently.

"DON'T PLAY DUMB!" Finn shouted. "WE BOTH KNOW THAT YOU STOLE MY FATHER'S SWORD AND USED IT TO FORCE MARCELINE TO DATE YOU AGAIN! NOW WHERE IS SHE!?"

"Finn?" Marceline asked faking surprise when she entered the living room.

"GIVE ME MY BLOOD!" a red demon screamed appearing in the middle of the living room.

"Kee oth rama-" Finn said.

"FINN NO!" Marceline yelled.

"Pancake," Finn finished.

Instantly the demon exploded into a ball of fire at the same time as Joshua's sword shone bright red and Finn had to shield his eyes.

"What is...oh you have got to be kidding me," Finn said.

"You freed the Lich and his son," Marceline said. "At least now I don't need to serve Ash anymore."

"Why do you always have to ruin my plans?" Ash asked.

"Because I don't like you," Finn said. "Are you okay Marceline?"

"She's fine," Ash said.

Finn threw a kunai over his shoulder and hit Ash in the throat, killing him instantly.

"I'm far from alright," Marceline said. "But I will be."

"Good," Finn said. "For now, I have to fight. You should run."

"Not without you," Marceline said.

"I'll meet you at your house," Finn said. "I promise."

Marceline didn't believe him but nodded and ran to her house. When she was gone Finn turned back to the sword and pulled out an Axe-guitar he had bought at Choose Goose's store. The moment the axe was out two skeletons came out out the sword just before it exploded. One skeleton was the Lich without question. The other was similar to the Lich but without a crown or horns. It was about half the Lich's height and had a sword made out of bone. The Lich himself had his hands lit on green fire that could kill and was holding a bone axe that was also burning with the same fire.

"May I go first father?" the son asked.

"Very well Pierre," the Lich said. "Make me proud, you need to because I am far from proud of your name."

"Today's really not a good day for you to fight me guys," Finn said. "I'm really not in the mood."

Pierre charged forward and Finn swept his legs out from under him with the axe the used it to cut his skull in half. The Lich charged and swung at Finn as fast as he could but Finn was easily able to keep out of the way of his axe. After a few minutes Finn darted past the Lich and cut him in half then cut his skull in half as well. Then he walked out of the house and began to walk away. Before he was very far away the house exploded skyward and then fell and smashed on the head of a giant Lich King that made the house look like a toy. Finn knew that this was his chance to end the Lich so he ran to the Lich's leg and climbed to his skull and into its eye socket. He went to the brain and found a well similar to the one Princess Bubblegum had fallen into.

"Come on out," Finn called. "I know you're here."

A normal sized version of the Lich fell out of the wall and landed in front of Finn. Before it could do anything, Finn tackled him into the well and then climbed out as fast as he could. He watched the Lich melt and felt the giant version shudder. He jumped out and was prepared to die when Marceline caught him and flew him back to her house.

"Thanks for the catch," Finn said.

"Had to make sure you kept your promise," Marceline said.

"I have to ask," Finn said. "What did Ash do to you?"

"Nothing," Marceline said very unconvincingly. "I'm fine."

"You can't lie to me Marceline," Finn said. "Not about this."

Marceline's face fell and Finn was able to guess the real answer. He covered his mouth and bit his tongue hard to keep from swearing.

"It's okay," Marceline said.

"How could it possibly be okay?" Finn asked.

"You saved me," Marceline said. "Again."

"You do make a pretty good damsel in distress," Finn joked.

Marceline punched him in the arm and they both laughed. Marceline got an apple and drained it then tossed the rest into the trash.

"At least I don't have to worry about the Lich anymore," Finn said.

"How did you kill him this time?" Marceline asked.

"I threw him into his well and he disintegrated," Finn said.

"Why didn't you die?" Marceline asked.

"I guess I just got out fast enough," Finn said.

Marceline smirked and couldn't help but make fun of him.

"Maybe the well just thought you stink," Marceline said plugging her nose.

"Very funny," Finn said. "Maybe if you had been there it would have gone nuclear because it thought you were butt ugly."

"Ha ha," Marceline said. "Thank you."

"Of course," Finn said.

Just then his phone went off and he answered it by the second ring. Then he set his face in his hand and hung up.

"Let me guess," Marceline said. "Why-wolf."

"Worse," Finn said. "The Flame King just declared war on the Candy Kingdom and Ice Kingdom."

"But, you're the only person in the Ice Kingdom," Marceline said. "And why does Flambo want to go to war?"

"God knows," Finn said. "Guess I have to go stop a war now."

"Don't get burned," Marceline said.

"Don't worry," Finn said. "I was an Ice Ninja once."

"Can you still use the tricks?" Marceline asked.

Finn made three hand signs and an Ice Sword grew out of his hand. Marceline flew him to the Candy Kingdom and then retrieved her Axe-base and when she got back he had his Axe-guitar.

"Where'd you get that?" Marceline asked.

"Choose Goose," Finn said. "Like it?"

"Can you play?" Marceline asked.

Finn flipped the axe over and began to play Crazy Train perfectly. After a couple measures he stopped and his smile faded.

"They're here," Finn said.

Marceline turned around and sighed. The entire Flame Kingdom was marching toward them. Finn walked out and met them halfway with Marceline.

"What are you doing here?" Finn asked.

"We need to kill Princess Bubble-butt before she kills us," Flame Princess, now Flame Queen, said.

"I don't think so," Finn said. "I'm sorry but if you even try you'll die."

"How's that?" Flambo asked.

"Look around," Finn said.

They did and saw that they were surrounded by Finns. Most were a little smoother and shinier than normal.

"Ice Clones," Flame Queen said. "Impressive. I didn't know you were an Ice Ninja."

"Well I am," Finn said. "So go home or all of you die."

"We'll go if we can have her as a slave," Flambo said pointing at Marceline.

Finn stepped in front of her protectively and Flame Queen grinned.

"We found our slave men, get her," Flame Queen said to the army.

"Caltrum Hailstorm!" Finn said making hand symbols in sync with his clones.

All of them shot hundreds of Ice Shuriken and together they shredded every Flame Soldier. Only Flambo and Flame Queen were left.

"I'll give you both one chance," Finn said. "Leave now."

"Only if you give us her," Flame Queen said.

"I don't want her," Flambo said. "It's over your highness."

Flambo walked past Finn and Marceline then turned and glared at Flame Queen. Flame Queen, however, wouldn't be denied so easily.

"You'll regret this," Flame Queen said.

"No," Finn said. "I won't."

Finn began to make hand symbols but before he could finish, Flame Queen exploded into a column of flame and all of the Ice Clones melted. Finn kept making hand symbols but just as he was about to make the last one, Flame Queen picked him up and he stopped and began trying desperately to get out of her grip before he turned into charcoal. After a second he made three desperate hand signs and made an Ice Sword then drove it into Flame Queen's hand. She dropped him and Marceline caught him. He made fifteen hand symbols and then smirked.

"You lose Flame Queen," Finn said. "Absolute zero!"

The sky filled with clouds and it became a blizzard in seconds. A moment later it was a complete white out and the only two things they could hear was the wind and Flame Queen's screams. After a couple seconds it was twenty below zero and Finn was shaking so hard that Marceline was beginning to think his skin might fall off the bone. Then it was over. The clouds cleared, it was back to eighty degrees Fahrenheit, and Flame Queen was gone. Finn, however, was still shaking just as violently.

Marceline flew him to the Hospital Kingdom and the doctors took him to warm him up. About fifteen minutes later Doctor Princess walked out with Finn and told Marceline that he would have a cold for a while and that he shouldn't live in the Ice Castle for a little while. Marceline thanked Doctor Princess then flew both of them back to her house.

"Aren't you worried about getting sick?" Finn asked.

"No," Marceline said. "I don't get sick."

Finn smirked and purposefully coughed on her but she just wiped his saliva off of her face then wiped her hand on his sleeve.

"Nice try," Marceline said. "It'll take more then that to gross me out."

Finn smirked but decided not to try too hard yet. Over the next couple of days Marceline took care of Finn until he was healthy again. He never really got around to trying to gross her out but didn't mind. When he was finally over his cold he said his goodbyes and went back to the Ice Castle. He instantly began cleaning and sharpening his weapons and when he was done that he began to train with his Axe-guitar. Mostly as a weapon but when he took breaks, he practiced playing it as a guitar. After a few hours of this he got hungry but found the fridge empty. He went to the closest store and bought enough food for a week then went back to the castle and found Gunther searching the fridge for something to eat.

"Hungry Gunther?" Finn asked tossing him a fish.

Gunther ate the fish then went into the other room. Finn put his food in the fridge and was glad he didn't get any bottles.

"Now then, I think I'm in the mood for spag..." Finn trailed off when he remembered all the time he had spent with Jake. "No, I feel like pizza."

He made himself a pizza but didn't have a working oven. He tested his ability to change the element his abilities used and was able to make a small flame. He used it to cook his pizza then ate it quickly and was just about to go back to training when his phone went off again.

"Hello?" Finn asked putting his phone on speaker.

"Finn?" Marceline asked. "I think there may be a problem."

Finn pulled his shirt off then got a new one.

"What kind of problem," Finn asked.

"There's a group of vampires outside my house," Marceline said. "They have the vampire King's seal on their full plate mail armor."

"Yikes," Finn said pulling his shirt on. "What's the easiest way to kill a vampire?"

"Wooden stake and garlic but silver works too," Marceline said.

Finn picked up his only silver sword and then took his phone off speaker and put it to his ear.

"On my way," Finn said.

Finn slid down the mountain then ran to Marceline's house and found the vampires waiting for him.

"Lord Finn," one said. "I am Count Vlad."

Finn threw his silver sword at one of the vampires and it cut him in half then looped around and cut a second one in half before returning.

"Sorry, I like to fight one on one," Finn said.

"Nice sword," Vlad said. "As I was saying, we...I...am here for Marceline and will not do any more damage than it takes to capture her."

"Not gonna to happen," Finn said. "See, she's my friend. I don't like people threatening my friends."

Vlad looked like he had expected this answer and looked like he was genuinely happy to get to fight Finn. He also looked a little unsure about the outcome of said fight.

"Ready?" Finn asked.

"Wen you are," Vlad said.

Finn charged and Vlad outpaced him with ease. No matter how fast Vlad was, Finn was able to keep him on the defensive. Vampires couldn't touch silver without their flesh burning so he made sure to keep out of range of the sword. After a couple minutes Finn drove the blade of the sword into the ground and Vlad and him both of them stopped. Vlad took his armor off and knew what Finn wanted. When Vlad was free of his armor they began to fight again and this time Vlad was on the offensive as much as the defensive. For the next few minutes Vlad and Finn traded punches but were able to either dodge or block all of each others. After a few minutes, Finn managed to land a punch against Vlad's jaw and the silver of his ring sent pain through Vlad's entire body. Vlad landed on his back and glared at Finn. Finn retrieved his sword and walked over. Vlad began to scramble away but Finn drove his sword through Vlad's heart. Vlad went limp and Finn smirked then wrenched it out and stuck it back in the ground.

"You lose Vlad," Finn said.

"I don't though," said a very disturbing voice behind Finn.

Finn grabbed his sword and spun around to see another vampire standing in front of him. This one looked about a thousand years old and clearly had a lot of confidence.

"And just who are you?" Finn asked.

"Dracula," the vampire said.

"Nice name," Finn said. "I liked that movie too but not enough to take the monster's name."

"The monster is based off of me," Dracula said.

Finn swung his sword and Dracula caught his arm then threw Finn into Marceline's house. The wooden siding exploded and fell on top of him. He stood and picked up two wooden stakes then glared at Dracula.

"Fell free to try it," Dracula said.

Finn threw both then picked up more and threw them. He continued this for several minutes but Dracula just dodged them all. Eventually Finn picked up the last one and Dracula charged. At the last second Finn threw the stake and Dracula caught it so that it was over his heart but still about an inch away. Then Finn jumped and kicked the stake forcing Dracula to accidentally drive it through his heart.

"How?" Dracula asked.

"You forgot to check my skill first," Finn said.

"You cheated," Dracula said. "How?"

Finn held up the hand with the ring and smiled.

"It allows me to throw things with deadly accuracy, even from a hundred yards," Finn said.

"Nice," Dracula said. "The King is on his way. Make sure Marceline's gone when he gets here."

Finn nodded and Dracula turned into a pile of ashes. Then Finn sighed as Marceline walked out.

"Dude said the King was on his way," Finn said. "You should split."

"The King isn't a threat," Marceline said. "It's his right hand servant you should worry about."

Before either could move two more vampires suddenly appeared in front of Marceline's cave. One was in a white jumpsuit with jewels and shine metal decorating it. There were strips of cloth hanging off of the bottom of the sleeves and the sides of the pant legs. The vampire also had a white vest with similar designs over his arm and aviator sun glasses. He put the vest on and Finn nearly keeled over from laughing so hard. Then he really did fall over when he saw that the King's right hand servant was a stereotypical scrawny preteen nerd with glasses that had tape around the middle, a massive overbite, braces, a yellow plaid shirt with two pens and one pencil in the left breast pocket and a calculator in the right breast pocket, khakis, and brown loafers.

"The King is Elvis Presley?" Finn asked.

"Yes," Marceline said.

"Which makes the geek his right hand," Finn said.

"I'm not a geek," the right hand said before making a sucking noise and he cleaned his braces with his saliva.

Finn couldn't take anymore. He began rolling around on the ground laughing as hard as he could. After a second the nerd appeared over him and grabbed him by the throat, completely cutting of his oxygen supply and making Finn's eyes go wide.

"My name, is Arthur," the nerd said. "Use it."

Arthur threw Finn into the cave wall and one of the stalactites fell and pinned Finn's left foot to the ground. Finn fought the urge to scream but did notice that every vampire in the cave suddenly looked hungry.

"Don't even think about it Marceline," Finn said pulling on the stalactite but finding it impossible to remove. "Darn it! Why is this so hard to lift?"

"Let me help," Arthur said walking over.

Finn pulled out a silver kunai and said, "You stay back."

Arthur just kept walking and When he got there he tried to pull the stalactite out but it really wouldn't budge. After a couple seconds he smashed in near Finn's foot then pulled his foot up and off. Then he tackled Finn and began to try to bite him.

Finn kicked Arthur off and threw his kunai but Arthur caught it between his middle and index fingers then tossed it aside and smirked.

"Not quite chief," Arthur said.

"How are you so good?" Finn asked.

Arthur undid the buttons of his shirt then pulled it open. The inside was lined with at least twenty pockets. Each one was filled with kunai.

"Did you think you were the only one who knew how to fight with throwing knives?" Arthur asked.

"Give me one," Finn said.

Arthur tossed him a kunai and Finn caught it. It was made out of enchanted wood and Finn knew that Arthur wanted a challenge.

"Really?" Finn asked. "Are you challenging me?"

"Yep," Arthur said.

Finn charged at Arthur and they began fighting at close rang with the knives and after about fifteen minutes, Arthur put a knife through Finn's stomach and Finn put his knife through Arthur's heart. Then he pulled Arthur's knife out and wiped his blood off and turned on Elvis.

Elvis clapped slowly and Finn grinned and couldn't help but imitate Elvis and say, "Thank you. Thank you very much."

Elvis grinned as well and sprinted forward but before he could get all the way there Finn threw the kunai and it went through his heart and came out the other side.

"That's all folks," Finn said.

Marceline clapped and began to walk over but stopped when yet another vampire walked into the cave. Finn picked the wood kunai up off of the ground and began walking forward.

"Stop!" Marceline said.

"Why?" Finn asked.

"He's my ex-boyfriend," Marceline said. "He's just here to visit."

Finn threw the kunai into the ground and retrieved his own then left without saying goodbye.

"Did I do something wrong?" the vampire asked.

"No, you didn't Chad," Marceline said. "He just hates holidays and the day after tomorrow is Valentine's Day."

"Oh," Chad said.

Chad and Marceline walked inside and Finn went back to the Ice Castle. He sat on his bed and tossed his kunai into the drawer. Then he laid on his back and waited to fall asleep. It was well after midnight when he finally fell asleep.

In his dream it was Valentine's Day but he was happy because he had finally gotten the guts to ask Marceline out and she had agreed.

When Finn woke up it was about three in the morning and he got up and began to train. He really didn't feel like doing anything but he wanted to keep busy enough that he wouldn't have time to think. The problem was that he had more time to think training than when he was sitting still. He knew full well that he liked Marceline as more than a friend but he was too afraid of rejection to ask her out.

After a couple hours Finn stopped training and got cleaned up then went for a walk. He didn't realize where he was going until he was halfway to Marceline's cave. He stopped short and was about to start walking back to his house when he saw Marceline and Chad sitting on top of her cave. They were kissing and Finn glared at Chad before he turned and took off jogging toward Choose Goose's store. When he got there, Choose Goose took one look at his expression and knew what Finn wanted. He led Finn to a newly added room on the store and Finn saw that it was filled with pictures of people in Ooo and with Valentine's Day things. Finn pulled out his Axe-guitar and began destroying everything. After about ten minutes he had destroyed everything except one picture. It was of Marceline. He picked it up and after a second he tore it to shreds then picked up his guitar and went out of the store. He didn't feel any less angry after destroying everything than he had when he started. If anything he was more angry. He looked at his guitar and noticed an inscription that hadn't been there before. The inscription was in Kanji because Finn was one of the only two people in all of Ooo that could read it.

Once translated, the inscription read, "Since this is important to you I decided to right this on it. Thank you for saving me from Ash. I never would have though you could defeat both the Lich and his son. Thank you for everything you've ever done for me. You're a great friend. Marceline."

Finn suddenly felt his angry soar to new heights. He had been trying not to think about what he knew Ash had done to her. He suddenly found himself smashing his guitar on the ground. He knew that he was angry with ash and was taking it out on anything that had to do with Marceline. He also knew that most of his anger was with himself for being human, for being alone, and for being too afraid to ask Marceline out while she was still single.

When Finn was done smashing his guitar he went to the Barbarian lands and found the Golems. He told them to attack him because he needed to take his anger out of something and they happily obliged. One Golem attacked Finn from each side and Finn went berserk. He beat them all to rubble and waited for them to regenerate before he did it again. No matter what he did he couldn't get rid of his blind fury so he eventually gave up on the Golems and instead went back to his tree. Most of it was gone but there was still his basement. It had been under a layer of cement so that, in the event of his house collapsing, it would survive. He went into the basement and looked around.

The basement was divided into two rooms. One room was the his trophy room. He had skulls from a wide range of creatures, Xergiok's broken wand, Ash's cloak and pouch of sleeping powder, the Ice King's crown, and several weapons from multiple bandits. The other room was his torture chamber complete with a werewolf strapped to The Rack.

Finn walked over to his tray of torture instruments and picked up a simple straight razor. He turned toward the werewolf and was about to release him when the werewolf decided to speak.

"Torture me all you want but you will never get me to talk!" the werewolf said. "Marceline will die and you will join us!"

Finn showed no emotion but still slit the wolf's throat. He then put the razor down and carried the wolf's body out to his back yard and threw it into the landfill there. Then he went back to his basement and sat on the edge of The Rack. He had once been on one himself but that memory was a long time ago. He got up and went to his trophy room and began to reminisce about the battles he and Jake had had. He wished that Jake were there and also wished that they hadn't gotten into a fight the last time he had seen him. He briefly wondered if Jake had actually come back to the tree. He stopped wondering this when he found Jake sitting on the floor if their house with a Katana in his hand.

"You burned down our house," Jake said.

"Accident," Finn said. "I dropped a hot frying pan and the place went up in smoke."

"You burned our house," Jake repeated standing.

"Can we not do this right now?" Finn asked.

"YOU BURNED OUR HOUSE!" Jake shouted.

Jake charged at Finn and swung but Finn blocked it with a kunai blade.

"It was an accident!" Finn said. "I told you that already!"

Jake kicked Finn away then charged again with the blade out in front of him. Finn kicked the sword away then pinned Jake and put the knife to his throat.

"Calm down!" Finn said. "I didn't mean to burn it!"

"Everything of Mom and Dad's was in there!" Jake said. "You destroyed everything we had left of our family!"

"NOT OUR FAMILY!" Finn shouted. "YOURS!"

"What?" Jake asked taken aback.

"They're not my family," Finn said. "They never were. They raised me and I can never repay that. But that never made them my family! My family abandoned me!"

"They were too your family!" Jake said. "You loved them and they raised you as their own!"

"They're dogs!" Finn said. "I'm a human! They're Man's Best Friend! Filthy mongrels! You're the worst of all of them!"

Jake kicked Finn away and Finn stood.

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Jake shouted growing until he smashed the cement covering the basement.

"NO!" Finn said. "It's true and you know it!"

Jake smashed the ground where Finn had been but Finn was running toward Jake's foot. He climbed up Jake's leg and to his head then drove a kunai into his eye. Jake howled in pain and smashed Finn away. Finn stood and threw another kunai at Jake's good eye abut Jake covered his eye and the kunai got stuck in his hand. Jake shrunk back down and grabbed his kunai they turned to fight Finn. Finn, however, was appalled at what he had done and was running away as fast as he could without caring where he was going.

After fifteen minutes he arrived at the Evil Dark Forest. He went to the heart of the forest and sat on a log. He didn't care that he was probably in danger. All he cared about was the fact that he had attacked his brother with the intent to kill him and had called his family filthy mongrels. He put his head in his hands and tried his hardest not to cry. As if in answer to his distress, Marceline floated out of the trees and wordlessly wrapped her arms around him. He didn't react at all and Marceline had no intention of trying to find out what was wrong.

"I hurt him Marcie," Finn said. "I was going to kill him."

"Who?" Marceline asked.

"Jake," Finn said. "I put a kunai into his eye."

Marceline didn't know what to say so she simply remained silent. She expected that to be all that was troubling Finn but he wasn't done yet.

"I called my family filthy mongrels too," Finn said.

"I'm sure you didn't mean it," Marceline said.

"Yes I did," Finn said. "I meant every word."

Marceline knew there was nothing she could say to make him stop hurting so she just hugged him tighter. Finn just sat there and eventually fell asleep. Marceline smiled slightly when she saw him sleeping then carefully lifted him and flew him back to the Ice Castle and laid him in his bed. She pulled the blankets up to his shoulder then turned and silently left. She went back to her house and went to bed. She and her ex-boyfriend had kissed to see if there was anything left between them but had agreed that it would be better if they didn't date.

She fell asleep and was listening to her alarm clock what seemed like a moment later. She just lay there for a long time and eventually reached over and shut it off. She got up and took a shower. Then she got dressed. She brushed her teeth and drained an apple then sat at her table and just sat there. It was Valentine's Day and Finn would be, once again debating killing himself. He had once told Marceline that it got harder to resist every year. She didn't know if he would be able to survive this year but didn't think she could help him anyway. She knew That she was in love with Finn but she didn't think he felt the same. She got up and looked out a window. She instantly froze. Finn was standing a couple yards away from her door. He was holding a heart-shaped box and Marceline could smell the chocolate inside.

Finn stared at Marceline's house for a couple minutes then looked down at the box. It was covered in red velvet and was filled with every kind of chocolate in existence. He smirked at how stupid he was. Marceline was a vampire and didn't eat chocolate. He knew that she could probably drain the velvet but she had done that once and had told him that it tasted like crap, even to her. He smirked and threw the box at the wall as hard as he could and it exploded. Then he turned and began walking back to the Ice Castle.

Marceline covered her mouth in a mixture of surprise and hurt feelings. She couldn't believe that Finn had smashed the box on the wall. She had assumed that Finn had been going to give it to her but he had instead destroyed it and gone back to his new home. She went out to the remains of the chocolate box and knelt. She had once told Finn that she didn't eat chocolates but that didn't mean that she couldn't or that she didn't like chocolates.

"What's wrong with me?" Finn asked himself as he stomped through the snow to the Ice Castle. "Why would Marceline like me? She's immortal and compared to her I'll be a kid when I die of old age. I'm so stupid if I actually thought I had a chance."

Marceline stood and flew into the air. She knew where Finn was going and knew that if anything could save him it would be her telling him that she loved him. She got to the door to the castle and saw that Finn wasn't there yet. She walked over and sat on the only piece of furniture that wasn't made out of ice. The bed was actually surprisingly comfortable and was big enough for multiple people to lay in it at once.

The moment Finn stepped inside his castle he could sense her. He knew that she wanted to talk, and he knew that she had seen what he had done.

"You can come out," Finn said. "I know you're here."

Marceline stepped out of the bedroom and looked like she wanted to apologize for something. He looked about the same so neither spoke at first.

"You saw?" Finn asked.

"Yes," Marceline said. "Were they originally for me?"

"Yes," Finn said. "But you don't eat chocolates so they were a waste of time."

"No they weren't," Marceline said. "Just because I don't eat chocolates doesn't mean I can't or wouldn't eat them. I love chocolates."

"I don't," Finn said. "I'm sorry I smashed them."

"I don't care about that," Marceline said. "I care more about why you were going to give them to me at all."

Finn didn't answer and his eyes had yet to leave his shoes. He didn't seem embarrassed or apologetic anymore. Now he just seemed hurt.

"Because...I love you," Finn mumbled.

"What?" Marceline asked.

"Because I love you," Finn said looking her in the eye.

Marceline blinked in confusion. She had to have heard him wrong. But the look he was giving her made it obvious that she had heard him correctly.

Finn wanted to laugh, to say he was joking, to do anything to get Marceline to stop looking at him like he had just spoken gibberish. After about three minutes of her just staring at him she suddenly shot toward him in a blur. He reached for a kunai, but before he could grab one, Marceline had reached him. She put her hands on his shoulders and his immediate reaction told him that she was going to kill him but before he could react she kissed him. His eyes widened and he simply blinked in confusion and after a second Marceline pulled away. Finn blinked again as his brain struggled to comprehend the simple fact that Marceline had kissed him. After a couple seconds his brain suddenly began to work again and he began trying to talk but he had lost that ability.

"You...but...I," Finn said.

Marceline smiled and kissed Finn again. Finn had a similar reaction but this time his brain recovered after a moment and he closed his eyes and began to kiss Marceline back. His hands moved to the small of her back and she wrapped hers around his neck. After a couple of minutes they broke apart and rested their foreheads against one another.

"I love you," Marceline said.

"I love you too," Finn said.

About five weeks later Finn went to Jake's house to apologize. Jake forgave him and Finn got called out to hunt a werewolf pack. He found them but nearly died fighting them. As it was he wasn't expected to recover.

"Finn?" Marceline asked when she arrived at the hospital immediately after hearing about what had happened.

"Hey Marcie," Finn croaked. "Looks like I underestimated how many werewolves could be in one pack."

"How long do you have?" Marceline asked.

"About a week," Finn said. "Give or take a day."

"I could turn you," Marceline said. "I can still save you."

"I know you could," Finn said. "But I wasn't going to ask."

"Why?" Marceline asked.

"Because you deserve to be happy," Finn said. "I was going to let it be your choice in case you were unsure that you really wanted to be with me."

"I love you," Marceline said. "I have no doubt that you are the person I want to spend eternity with."

Finn smiled and nodded. Marceline bent down and bit his neck. He didn't make a sound and when she pulled away she nodded. He smiled a tiny bit then blacked out and his heart monitor flat-lined.

"Sleep well Finn," Marceline whispered. "I'll see you when you wake up."

About a day later Finn woke up and Marceline instantly pushed an apple into his hands. He drained it and was able to keep from draining anyone. He and Marceline got married about a month later. When Jake found out what Finn had become he tried to kill him and Finn reacted by accidentally killing Jake. Lady Rainicorn wasn't very happy and also tried to kill Finn with a similar result.

THE END