AN: I should probably mention that this story was the result of a number of absolutely random thoughts, starting with 'there isn't enough Artie Maddicks stories', including a comment about Teen Wolf's Kanima's tongue in a 'Kiss, Kill, Marry' video played by the cast on Youtube, and I'm not sure Harry got involved. All well, I had fun writing it.
I should probably just mention that since Flea only existed in the movies and we never saw his power, I went with the name gave him shrinking and enhanced physical strength.
Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter or X Men, do you really think that this would be on this sight? No, didn't so.
"That's so cool Harry! Can I take a turn?"
"Sure Siren, hop on."
Siren smiled brighter than the sun as Harry brought the broom to the ground, quickly climbing on behind him. Smiling amusedly right back, Harry quickly coached her into adjusting her grip around his waist and tightening her legs around the broom before take off with a good kick, bringing a whoop for joy from his auburn haired friend as they shot like a rocket into the sky.
She was having the time of her life. A lot of students were. Harry was one of the most fascinating students ever to come to the Xavier Institute. He was the first mutant, wizard hybrid to ever to be born and he lived in a magical castle for most of the year. The differences between the magical world and the 'Muggle' world, as he put it, and the stories about his adventures at Hogwarts were more than enough to draw a crowd. They'd hoped to get a good look at his spells and were disappointed about the fact that he couldn't use them outside of the castle yet, but that was quickly overcome when he started bringing some magical items with him for his weekend visits.
The kids had a blast with them. Frisbees that sparked like fireworks as you threw them, fake wands that either poofed up flowers or wiggled like a worm when you tried to wave them, animated chocolate frogs, animal crackers that made you act like the animal they were shaped after for a full minute, potions that made your voice squeaky or turned your hair ridiculous colours, the list went on. Though, most people got a clue and stayed away from the Bertie Bott's Every flavour beans after the first round. Kitty and Jones were the only ones that still touched them, but everyone else was always keen to watch their reactions when they did. The funniest time was when Kitty ate a red one that turned out to be a red hot chilli pepper flavour and ended up phasing through every surface she came across, including the floor, in a desperate search for a gallon of water.
Still, the most popular trinket brought to their attention was Harry's broom. The chance to go for a flight was too good for just about any of them to pass up. Even Bobby, Rouge and Peter had taken a ride with their newest student. It was so popular that eventually Professor Xavier had to pull an overcrowded Harry out of the masses and set up a scheduled time period when you could go for a flight with Harry and be booked in. Siren was only getting a go without all that because it was slower day and she hadn't had a go before. Besides, it was the winter holidays. Harry had come to spend the whole thing at the Institute, but most of the students who had families that loved them had headed home. Significantly less demand equalled a bit of rule bending.
But still, it wasn't so much Harry that Flea was paying attention to right now. Actually, he was too busy feeling sorry for Harry's roommate, Artie Maddicks.
Artie was standing a little off to the side, as he always did with crowds surrounding Harry, a sad, longing look never quite hidden by his curiosity and amusement. Artie was fascinated, both by the magic and by Harry in general. And, based on personalities, Flea would have thought that Harry would find Artie amusing. He still did. Sadly, that wasn't the case. Ironically, one of the few people in the school Harry was pretty guarded around was his own roommate.
It hadn't made any sense to Flea. Sure, Artie was a bit mischievous and sometimes a little childish, but he was an easy person to be around. Like most mutants, he just wanted care and attention. Harry didn't seem to mind him too much when they were first introduced. Heck, Flea was fully aware that he had a tendency to be far more annoying, especially when it came to personal space issues, which was something Harry was particularly unnerved by, but the two of them had grown thick as thieves.
Eventually, he had cornered Harry and confronted him about him about it. Harry had quickly grown very uncomfortable and guilty about the situation, but he had come clean, so Flea got his answer. Apparently it was a number of things about Artie that just set off the wrong memories. It had all started with Artie's tongue. A snake's tongue.
Mere weeks before discovering that he was a mutant, he'd faced a giant snake called a basilisk that could kill you just by looking at you or with its poisonous fangs, one of which had pierced Harry's arm. The basilisk had been terrorising his other school all year and had petrified one of his closest friends and two acquaintances. The reminder of such a horrific experience unsettled him.
And because of that, Artie's basic appearance became associated with a man named Tom Riddle's. They had very similar hair and eye colour, same skin complexion and a similar spark in their eyes when they're planning something that amused them. Normally, that wouldn't have happened, except he was not only there in the snake's chamber, but was the one controlling it. Also, Tom Riddle was discovered to be Lord Voldemort, the monster of a man that tried to kill him after murdering his family. The man who also came to Hogwarts in Harry's first year by, ironically, possessing the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher.
And that's where Harry's final issue with Artie stemmed. Not only had Voldemort possessed someone, but the basilisk scenario occurred by a piece of Voldemort's memory being placed in a diary and taking full mental control of his best friend's sister. That had caused a few issues in the school and with Harry in general. Of every person at the institute, he was by far the most wary of Professor Xavier, never feeling comfortable around the man. The ability to get into one's head was absolutely terrifying to the wizard. The possession wasn't even the beginning of that problem. Rather, it was the fact that Harry had come from an abusive home where he was absolutely defenceless and his free mind was the only thing he really had. All of it accumulated to the point where he simply couldn't handle the thought of telepaths touching his mind at all. And that included the miniscule version Artie had. Mind locking, the ability to paralyse the mind completely, and therefore, the body along with it.
Harry knew he wasn't being fair to Artie, but he just couldn't look past it all. Flea had tried again and again to mellow him out, but it never seemed to end well for any of them. Still, he wasn't going to give up until Harry and Artie were spending so much time together that he had to physically shove himself between them. That was his promise. Besides, that would give him a reason to invade their personal spaces that they couldn't complain about.
But how to do it? What haven't I tried? That was good question. He'd tried subtle approaches, random comments intending to calm Harry's aversion to telepathy down, inviting both of them to play basketball with him (that one had been seriously awkward, though it was a good game), 'coincidental' approaches, dragging one of them into the others' conversation (A bit of a challenge considering that Artie was a mute), trying to make them share common interests (though with their different life styles, sweets and breaking curfews seemed to be the only shared hobbies), convince the instructors to team them up in group training and straight out demanding that they make nice. Aside from convincing the Professor to remove the issues from Harry's head, something neither his friend or teacher would ever allow or do, Flea had officially run out of ideas.
A grumpy sigh left his lips as he trudged through the snow, towards the building. Normally, he'd ask Peter for ideas, but the metal coated junior X Man still had plenty of family that loved him, powers and all, so he was currently singing carols back home. He could try Bobby, he was usually good with getting people to open up, but that was always to him, not directing it to someone else. Besides, he often had it easy. Eight times out of ten, it was a girl that seemed to have a crush on him, though whether he was aware of it or not was usually a mystery.
"And it's not like there are too many other people left right now." Flea sighed again, looking around the grounds. Only so many mutants stayed during the holidays and it wasn't like Flea was actually friends with every student. He only had so many he could go to and most were keen to just let Harry and Artie work themselves out.
"I really wish I was a wizard too. Then I could just wave a wand and make the problem disappear." A small grin spread across his face as he mused out loud, though he doubted the problem would be nearly so simple even with magic. Harry would find some way to be a problem child.
Reaching the main door, Flea took one look back as a happy scream struck his ears to find Artie letting out a soundless sigh while Harry and Siren spiralled around a tree before heading inside. Maybe the internet could give him a few new ideas. They say can you learn how to build a bomb on that thing, how hard could it be to find tips for pushing roommates into a friend zone?
...
"Oh come on! Hasn't anyone ever heard of a quick fix?" When glaring at the screen didn't give him the answer he wanted, he huffed and spun on his chair, crossing his arms and pouting moodily at everything that came into his vision. Unfortunately, web searches hadn't been as enlightening as he'd hoped. Sure, there were solutions to this problem in front of him, but therapy takes years and if he was willing to wait that long, he'd leave the problem to resolve itself! "Why? Why did Harry have to be traumatised by someone so similar to Artie? It's all freaking random and Artie just happens to have all of it?"
"Sometimes the universe just loves to screw people over." Jumping, Flea spun his chair around to find Bobby leaning against the doorway, staring at him sympathetically. "We should all know about that by now."
"Yeah, but Artie's short end of the stick's only getting smaller." Flea sighed, running a hand through his hair. "And I really do think Artie and Harry would like each other if Harry would just stop associating Artie with a deranged lunatic."
"Well, he is getting better." Bobby offered a small smile. "Now you can just cut the tension with a knife."
"That's better?"
"Before, you could actually slam into it like a brick wall. So yeah, it's progress." Well, he did have to give Bobby that.
"Well, do you have any suggestions to speed up progress that doesn't involve 'how does that make you feel'?" Flea asked, glaring back at the computer through the corner of his eye. "I'm stumped."
"I'd believe it." Bobby nodded grimly. He'd seen plenty of failed attempts. Harry's just too stubborn. "Sorry, but I can't think of anything besides locking them in a room together and refusing to let them out until they're getting along. Don't even think it." He added quickly as a bright, intrigued look. "Harry has a bad history with locked rooms as well. And if he gets mad enough over it, well...you don't wanna experience what his 'aunt' did. Unpredictable magical outbursts, remember?"
"Right. Of course he does! Stupid, abusive pieces of-"
"Language Flea!" Bobby cut him off, though one look at his face was more than enough to know he agreed with the sentiment whole heartedly. He'd gone to Harry's old home and apparently almost sealed it inside a glacier. Complete with the family inside.
"Right, right, of course, swearing is wrong." Flea drawled, rolling his eyes. "Locking a door wouldn't help anyway." He conceded with a sigh. "They'd just draw attention from one of the teachers and get me in trouble for locking them up in the first place. But..." A mischievous grin started growing on his face and he was sure that Bobby could actually see the light bulb above his head. "What if we made it that they could let themselves out at any time?"
"Wouldn't that defy the point?" Bobby raised an eyebrow as Flea quickly spun back to the computer, typing away fast on the keyboard. "What are you planning?" He was starting to get worried.
"The one quick fix I haven't tried." Was Flea's only response as he pulled up another webpage. Only growing more wary by the second, Bobby walk right up to him and looked over his shoulder. One look at the page had him frowning very uncertainly.
"You realise that that method is a double edged sword, right?" He asked. "You could very easily make it worse."
"Yeah well, it's worked plenty of times before."
"Yeah, on people who were high strung, not the mentally scarred. And...You're not doing that one!" He added adamantly. "You are not shedding them of their clothes!"
"Oh, come on Bobby! You know I'd never do that!" Flea cried, his face burning as quickly scrolled passed a suggestion of a nudity day. He had the ability to shrink and unfortunately, his clothes did not shrink with him. That had given him a few too many humiliating moments to ever consider that as an option. Besides, anything he did to them, he had to be willing to face himself. Artie was involved, whether this worked or not, there was going to be payback for this and he had no intention of streaking through the halls. Again.
"So what are you planning?" That wariness was not going away. Flea wasn't ever going to leave this room if he didn't answer, he knew that for sure.
"Just to make them get close and personal." He answered, his smile growing twice as big as he finally found the info he wanted to check. "How embarrassing and awkward it gets depends on them. Meaning, how much of a crowd they attract before they swallow their prides."
"This won't work." Bobby shook his head, staring at the page. "You'll only make things more awkward between them. And then probably find yourself tied up and tossed into the snow for making them do it."
"If I do, at least it'll be both ways and Artie won't be watching Harry like a kicked puppy." Flea shrugged. "And maybe getting even with me will help with bonding. Either way, at least after this, it can't get any more awkward between them, so they can only improve."
"Or stay stagnant." Bobby muttered before sighing in defeat. There was no way he was going to be able to stop Flea. "Just know I'm not helping when they turn on you. How do you intend to make this work anyway?"
"Easy." The smile crossing the fourteen year old's face could have sat quite comfortably on the Cheshire Cat. "With one of the little charmed toys in Harry's room."
"Ah, so stealing is also involved in the plan that won't even work." Bobby responded with mock light heartedness.
"Hey, according to the Professor's philosophy, it will work." Flea retorted smartly. "According to him, you stop associating things with the word bad by learning and experience with it. This will teach Harry that Artie is not like this riddle guy, who would kill him, not kiss him, and do you know a better way to learn about a snake tongue?"
"Read a book? Observe with eyes?" Bobby offered, though it did come out defeatedly. There was no changing Flea's stubborn mind. He did get that codename for more than one reason after all. Grabbing on and not letting go until he was satisfied was well part of it.
"This will give him more detail. It proves that Artie doesn't have the venom or bite to go with it. And it's something to laugh about later." Flea responded cheerfully, shutting down the computer. It had given him all the reassurance that he needed. "Now, are you going to help me and speed this up or what?"
"Oh no, you're on your own." Bobby shook his head, already heading out the door. "But I will be there to laugh at you when Artie or Harry get even." He added with a grin, tilting his head back into the doorway as he left.
"Oh, ha ha!" All well. Better get started. The boys wouldn't be outside forever and he should at least have grabbed his weapon before they could find him in their room.
...
He couldn't rid himself of the proud, smug smile on his face as he hopped down from the ladder, carefully hiding it away before anyone could be the wiser. Stashing it out of the way in the rec room, he headed back out into the main hallway and waited, warning the other students away from his little trap. After all, he didn't need angry mutants out for his blood and warning his friends of his little scheme. Maybe it'd be worth it later, after the main purpose of his stunt was accomplished. It would be funny to see what matchups occurred.
It had taken a lot sneaking to get the ladder in and a lot of careful observation for signs of the teachers, but all his hard work had paid off. Hanging from the light bulb was a clipping of green and white mistletoe. Harry had got and brought it with him by request of some of the girls. It was magically enchanted to ensure that its custom was enforced. Whenever two people stood under it, it would release wards around itself and its victims that made it impossible to get away. The wards were easily shut down of course. They immediately collapsed after those imprisoned performed a 'proper kiss'. Normally, that was just a peck on the lips, however, this one was given to Harry by his friends, the Weasley twins. They were apparently major jokesters and had uped the charms to respond to what a teenager would call a proper kiss. A little experimentation on two classmates with varying levels of keenness had quickly had that determined to mean practically making out. Jubilee had called it tonsil hockey.
The only other way out, besides knowing a counter spell that Harry wasn't allowed to perform outside of Hogwarts, was to remove the mistletoe. Which was kind of hard when it was well beyond anyone's reach inside its wards and protected by the wards on the outside. Flea had planned that part out well.
"But still leaves the hard part." His smile turned into a bit of a frown as he stared at the door. "How do I get them under it at the same time?"
That was going to require some work. They were not going to come in at the same time. Heck, one of them may even use a different entrance. "Maybe I should have picked a more likely spot. Like their room." The only problem with that one was the pressure to get it out of the way before they drew a crowd wasn't there and they might be able to get the right help to remove it. Flea couldn't guarantee that Cyclops couldn't blast through the wards and turn the plant to cinders. It's not like they were particularly strong wards. They were meant for innocent fun, not prison. No, it was best if the fear of being spotted there and drawing a crowd over-rid their common sense.
He didn't have to wait long before the distraction part of his plan started. Much to his relief, Harry, who was just as likely to return inside the building through the roof or a window as he was the front, came striding in with Siren on one side and blast of wintery wind following behind them.
"That was so much fun Backlash! You gotta take me up again some time." Siren squealed as tried to fix her hair. She must have lost her cap during her flight, auburn locks were haphazardly thrown all around her head, struggling against her as she tried to move them away from her face. "Though it would be more fun if the broom didn't seem like it was going to suddenly fall out of the sky every five minutes." She added, shaking her head nervously at the thought.
"Yeah, sorry about that. It's an old school broom I borrowed." Harry muttered sheepishly, staring down at the wooden chips sticking out of the broom handle. "I haven't managed to replace my broom yet. Took an arm and a leg to get the school to let me borrow this old Comet. Sad to say, it's one of the better brooms that they have in that shed."
"You mentioned that your broom was a...Nimbus two thousand, right?" Flea jumped in quickly. This was the opening he needed. Harry loved flying brooms and everything to do about them, especially Quidditch. If anything could keep Harry distracted, broom talk would. "So what's the difference between a Comet and a Nimbus?"
"Oh, hey Flea." Harry deadpanned, taking his presence in stride. He'd only recently started to do that. He used to jump in fright every time Flea appeared. Flea missed that. Still, that didn't matter right now, Harry's eyes had already brightened at the question. "Broom names, such as Comet and Nimbus, can mean one of two things, brand or company, sometimes both. Nimbus brooms are a series of brooms, but they are also the only brooms made by the Nimbus industry. Comets are another set of brooms, racing brooms like the Nimbus', another series, but the same companies make other brooms. I heard that they also create a number of different travelling brooms as we as racing brooms. Travelling brooms move much slower, but are often bigger and handle a great deal more weight..."
He went on for a while, mentioning different types and brooms. Flea kept him going in the advantages and disadvantages of each series, though he wasn't retaining much. Siren soon got bored and took off, something that Flea was actually grateful for. Extra help holding Harry there would be great if they were in the know of his plan, but her oblivious presence only added another way to ruin it. What if she ended up under the mistletoe with one of the boys instead?
Fortunately, it didn't get to the point where Flea would have to pretend he'd caught every word, for a few minutes later, his other target made his way through the door. This could have been the trickiest part of his plan. Getting them close enough and under the charmed plant without his own body messing it all up or looking too suspicious and letting them catch on before the trap was sprung.
However, he was saved the grief as their conversation and the broom still in Harry's hand caught Artie's attention. That look of longing was back in his eyes and he slowly walked closer, as if he wanted to touch the flying stick, but was unsure it was a wise idea. Harry had gotten the nickname Backlash partly from his mutant power of deflection and partly because an emotionally peaked Harry had a tendency to unleash, wild, uncontrolled, unpredictable magic. They'd all heard the story of the woman who blew up like a balloon and the glass that disappeared, leaving his cousin at the mercy of a boa constrictor. With how uncomfortable Harry was around him, Artie wasn't keen to find out what would be in store for him.
Still, it brought him close enough. Waiting just a few more moments, counting down the steps his mute friend still needed to make, Flea let his curious expression turn into a huge smile and made his move.
"Artie!" Artie and Harry jumped, Artie startled right out of his daze and Harry out of his next sentence, as Flea bounded like his namesake right into the newer arrival's face. "I was hoping you'd show up soon. I have a question that I want you to answer."
Artie stared at him with wide eyes before he calmed into an expression that so obviously exclaimed 'oh, what now'. It was simply amazing how expressive the fork tongued boy could be, how much he could say even without a voice.
"Don't worry, it's a simple question. It'll take about ten seconds to find an answer." Artie didn't even have time to tense up before Flea's arm latched on to him and shoved him forward. Right into Harry.
"Ah-OOMMPH!" The bespectacled failed to react in time too and, not expecting Flea to use his enhanced strength to propel his roommate, completely failed to set himself up to withstand the force, sending bow boys stumbling to the ground in a heap. "FLEA! What the hell?"
Flea openly smirked as Artie gave him a dark look asking the exact same thing at the exact same time, pulling himself away from Harry so quickly that you'd think he was burned. He was about to give a verbal response, but right as he went to open his mouth, he opted to just let his smirk grow and point a finger up to the ceiling. And then laughed as their gaze followed it and locked on to the mistletoe, Harry gasping loudly at the sight of it while Artie's head shot right back down with a 'you are crazy, jerk' look. What actually surprised Flea to actually stop laughing was that Artie had ditched the usual, careful self control he held around Harry and actually stuck his reptilian tongue out at me. Though, he immediately pulled it back in a moment later, a sad apology shining in his eyes, when Harry looked down to glare at me, twitching a little at the sight of it.
"I want Artie to tell me what it's like to kiss someone. I bet it'll be real interesting with that forked one of yours." Flea replied chipperly, smiling first at Harry, then Artie.
"You want us t-ah!" Harry started, stomping towards Flea only to bounce back as he hit the wards. "That's my mistletoe! You dug that our of my room?"
"Like it's the first time I've gone through your stuff." Flea rolled his eyes, smirking again as a blue energy disk appeared over Harry's palm. "You know that won't work, right?"
"We'll see about-bah!" Harry retorted, only to bounce back, more forcefully this time, as he thrust his disk bearing hand at the wards, only to be repelled. "What?"
"You know you can't deflect anything that isn't in motion." The shrinker reminded him cheekily. "Wards just sit there, right. What moving force is there to deflect?"
'Let us go!', would be the only message Artie could ever possibly be trying to convey with the look he was giving the blond at the moment, but Flea just shook his head. At this point, he couldn't let them out if he wanted to. Only they could.
"Come on Artie, you paid attention when Harry was explaining it last week. You pay attention to every magical thing he says. The mistletoe has activated its wards. The wards encase it as well, so no one outside them can touch it. And it's far too high up for you to do anything about it. The wards will only be lowered one way. So go ahead. Release yourselves. Before you're doing it in front of a crowd." He added, his smirk turning sly, and causing Artie to pale, turning his head in all directions for unwanted spectators. Harry on the other hand, gritted his teeth and glared at his friend with eyes like daggers.
"Why are you even doing this?" He spat out, keeping his voice low. This was bad enough as it was, he did not need an audience on top of it. "You know that-"
"That's exactly why." Flea cut him off, letting his amusement die for a moment and piercing Harry with a look as sharp as the wizard's own. "Nothing was getting you passed your issues, so I thought I'd create a moment when you were vulnerable and awkward and had no choice but to face it. Now, come on Backlash!" With that, his seriousness disappeared instantly, a mischievous smile back in its place. "You say you're from the Hogwarts House of the brave, gather your courage and pucker up. It takes a lousy ten second make out. What self respecting teenage boy says no to that?"
"Well, usually, they're not faced with not only their own gender, but also the person who reminds them of the man and beast who tried to kill him!" Harry snapped right back, stunning Artie. The poor boy hadn't known what was the problem and that was not done tactfully. Flea couldn't help but feel a little guilty about that as Artie snapped his head at Harry, staring at him wide eyed and clamping his mouth shut tightly. It wasn't a secret that Harry was unnerved by his tongue, but now he knew why, he wasn't taking any chances.
But as much as Flea felt steadily worse as the guilty, pained looked on Artie's face grew and Harry gasped in guilty realisation at what he'd just blurted out, it did give him an opportunity and he was taking it.
"Who cares about gender? It's just a kiss, not a marriage proposal. Now, look at Artie. Look at him!" He started, growing more forceful as Harry hesitated. It took a good long moment, but with a pointed glare directed right at him, Harry complied. "Really look at him Harry and tell me you see a psychopath. Tell me he reminds you of a diary ghoul and a puff of black smoke. Tell me you don't see a sad, vulnerable kid before you."
"I..." The young wizard started, only to lose all his words as he stared. He'd never seen Artie look like this before. The few looks he got before Artie revealed his tongue and freaked Harry out had depicted a mischievous, possibly troublemaking child, completely confident in himself, completely in control. Like Riddle. Now however... "I can't." He didn't see Riddle. He actually saw a bit of himself. Scared, desperate to be liked, guilty for causing distress, even if he didn't actually do anything or know that he was doing it. Behind the look of sad realisation in his eyes, Harry could see the longing Flea saw there every time the pure mutant looked at the wizard hybrid. Behind the features that made Harry see a shadow of Voldemort around him, or flashes of the basilisk when that tongue came out, Harry saw a vulnerable child who wanted a friend.
"Then free yourselves." Flea stated, cheerfully once more. "Kiss him. Associate him with an embarrassing moment instead of a lunatic. Come ooonnnn, you know you wanna. And someone will show up and watch sometime soon. If you wanna limit the embarrassment, I recommending hurrying up."
"You know, I hate you." Grunting, Harry spared a few more seconds to glare at Flea before stepping up to a stunned Artie and looking him squarely in the eyes.
"No you don't, you love me." Harry and Artie completely ignored Flea, focusing solely, uncertainly on each other. Tension and awkwardness rolled off of them in waves and strong, steady blushes were growing on their cheeks, Artie's spreading down his neck.
"I'm sorry." Harry muttered, moving slowly and awkwardly, completely oblivious of what he was doing. Having absolutely no experience himself, Artie just stared unsurely at him. He wasn't sure what Harry was apologising about, the kiss, his reactions to Artie, it could have been any of it. Still, he bit his lip for a moment, struggling with a decision, before slowly, hesitantly, opening his mouth.
'It's ok'. He moved his mouth slowly, hoping Harry wouldn't be too distracted by his blue tongue to catch the words. Whatever he was apologising for, Artie was forgiving. His own Dad was killed right in front of him when he tried to protect him. He could understand the effects of trauma. And his motions were just as stiffly and clunky as Harry's.
Artie's blush only continued to spread up his ears as they hesitantly, squeamishly, forced their faces closer, only to bump their noses together, Harry grunting in frustration at the same time. More embarrassed than before, Artie started to pull back, but Harry finally did exactly Flea told him to and dived in, tilting his face a little and planting his lips right on Artie's.
His mute roommate gave a large gasp as their lips met, causing them to open for an increasingly embarrassed Harry to dive his tongue into his mouth. Artie didn't even think at all, his tongue simply responded to Harry's, causing the wizard hybrid to shiver as the prongs ran against the underside of his.
A loud pair of giggles smacked both of them in the ears a second later, making them much too aware of their surroundings. His blush growing ten times as dark as the mortifying realisation of being caught like this struck his brain, Artie immediately started t pull away, but Harry as having none of it, quickly wrapping his arms around his roommate, holding him in place and forcing him to continue kissing. I hadn't been quite ten seconds yet and he was not going through this twice.
Keeping his eyes clenched tightly shut, Artie started counting down the remaining time needed and couldn't pull away fast enough once he got to zero. Opening his eyes, he felt as the heat in his face intensified at the sight of Jubilee and Siren laughing at them, with Flea standing a little away a big smile on his face and his arms held wide in a 'what can you do?' gesture.
"I told you you should have done it quicker." He shrugged merrily, shamelessly. "You resisted and you got caught."
Feeling about ready to die of mortification, Artie sent one last embarrassed glare at Flea that guaranteed retribution before taking off to the stairs as fast as he could.
"You little git! I swear you planned their arrival too, didn't you?" Harry glared, storming right at Flea, trying to ignore the laughing girls as he picked up the forgotten broom like a baseball bat. A move that quickly had the still laughing Flea growing nervous.
"No, they came on their own. This is just a very used area, hehe." He shook his head, raising his hands defensively. "But look on the bright side. Your moments with Artie can't get any more awkward than they were just then. So it'll only get better from here."
"That's the bright side?" Harry growled, making Flea leap away from the ticked, embarrassed wizard mutant stomping his way. "I can't believe you..."
"Something wrong kiddies?" All four of them were effectively silenced as a gruff voice dominated the room. Looking up, three of them tensed up and quickly muttered nothing as the intimidating Wolverine casually walked right toward them, fixing each of them with a hard, unreadable look that sent chills down their spines.
Harry however, took one look at his approach, noticed where they were all standing and turned to Flea with such a feral grin even Wolverine was impressed. And Flea suddenly became absolutely terrified.
"Notice where Wolverine's going to be standing in a second?" He whispered evilly, moving deliberately noticeably so that Flea was between him and the scariest of the X Men. Flea took one look and paled with horror to find that Wolverine was heading straight for under the mistletoe. And Harry's broom was positioned perfectly to push him under too.
"AAAAHHHHHHHH!" Screaming so loud that everyone's hands flew to their ears in pain, and actually startling Wolverine enough to halt him in his tracks, Flea whipped around and took off out the front door so fast that you could almost see the comical dust storm behind him.
"What the hell was that about?"
"Magical mistletoe." Harry answered, turning back to Logan with the most innocent expression he could with his face still enflamed. "Flea put it up as a joke. I'm not too happy about it and you've stepped underneath it."
"I don't even wanna know kid." Logan sighed, sidestepping away from the charmed plant. "Just get it down before things get out of hand. Again."
"Right. Umm, how am I supposed to reach it sir?"
...
After that interesting day, when Flea finally resurfaced, he made a point of staying near Bobby and Rouge for the rest of the night, much to their amusement. The whole story had gotten out to everyone in the institute by the time dinner was on the table and everyone thought it was all hilarious. The teachers were trying to act mature and frown upon it, but Logan's involvement was enough to get even them snickering, particularly Cyclops. Which all equalled a moody Wolverine, which was a terrifying thought for all the younger kids, a panicky Flea and a blushing duo of dark haired thirteen year olds that couldn't make eye contact with anyone except for Flea, who found himself on the end of both their glares.
Still, his choice of company paid off and neither of the disgruntled boys touched him, though Bobby warned him to sleep with one eye open. Something that really would have come in handy.
Though much more so if it wasn't for the fact that one of his victims was a sub breed of psychic.
The next morning, he was rudely awakened by a gong, making him jump sky high out of bed and got one look at Artie smirking at him before his mind went blank. The next thing he knew, he was sitting on a chair placed in the doorway to the breakfast tables with Artie silently laughing at him.
"What did you do?" Flea demanded, moving to jump up again only to jolt back as his boxers and shirt refused to separate from the chair. "You glued me to the chair?"
Sticking his tongue out at him, Artie picked up a notepad and pen and quickly wrote away, holding it right up to Flea's face, just out of range of his arms, for him to read when he was done.
'Harry offered me a spray bottle with a very sticky solution while we were talking about revenge. It'll only last for about an hour and a half, but until it does wear off, that chair and your clothes aren't going anywhere.'
"That's all there is to your little revenge scheme?" Flea asked, partly unimpressed while the rest of him reprimanded the first part for tempting fate and making it worse.
However, the smug smile growing stronger on Artie's face quickly had him gulping. There was no way that was end of it. Flipping the page, Flea was sure that Artie would be cackling if he could speak as he jotted down another note.
'I asked Harry for another vial too. Look at your clothes.' Flea immediately looked down before even finishing the note and barely stopped his scream from coming out as more than a mortified squeak. His previously black shirt and Daffy Duck boxers had both been turned bright pink and coated with red love hearts. And to make it worse, on the centre of his chest was big heart the held what little of his clothes' old colouring in the crude shape of Wolverine's face, particularly well defined by the sideburns and two tuffs of hair.
'Charmed to decorate whatever it touches for Valentine's Day.' Artie tapped the note, drawing Flea's grossed out face back to it, before visiblyshaking with mirth as he held up a mirror.
"AHH!" This time he couldn't hold it in.
'Borrowed some of Jubelee's makeup too.' Was on the next page in the notebook, though Flea barely paid attention, he was too busy staring in horror at his reflection. His cheeks were rosy, purple lipstick covered his lips thickly, with matching eye shadow on his eyelids, and his hair was as pink as his clothes.
"You dyed my hair! You dyed it pink!"
'Instant colour changing potion. Just pour it on the hair and it will change colour for twenty four hours. Don't worry, you'll be a blond again tomorrow. Your clothes will go back to normal too.' Artie wrote back, sticking his tongue out at him and bobby his head around merrily. 'Once you're back in your room, you can find a cap to hide it under till then. Of course, that won't be for another hour and a half, about the same time everyone will come down for breakfast. You could shrink out of your clothes or rip yourself free of them, but it's a long, naked walk back to your room and Wolverine's made sure that we're used to early risings. Good luck and hope your scream didn't attract any attention...besides his.'
"Who's" Flea cried, paling considerably as he followed Artie's eyes to find Harry walking into view...with a camera! "NO!"
"Smile." Harry stated cheerfully, immediately snapping the photo. "Great. That'll come out nicely."
"What are you going to do with that?"
"Keep it for ourselves. Don't worry, we won't share it. It's just for us to laugh at." Harry smirked, bumping his shoulder into Artie's "And as a reminder to you about the consequences of forcing us into public humiliation. Well, see ya. We're gonna go hide the camera and pretend to be innocent."
"No, come on guys! Please help me out of this" Flea called after them, barely remembering to keep his voice down, lest he bring a crowd. This would be humiliating. Especially since all wiping his face seemed to be doing was smearing the makeup over more of it!
"You are perfectly capable of getting yourself out." Harry replied, smirking mockingly as they turned back around with matching smirks. "However long you're there depends entirely on you." And with that, they chuckled at Flea's irritated face and disappeared down the hall.
"Great." Flea muttered to himself, struggling in vein as he glared after them. "The first thing they do together is get even! Oh well, at least they seem to be growing chummy now." Maybe his plan worked too well?
It couldn't be helped now. Sighing, Flea slumped back in defeat and opted to make himself comfortable. He'd shrink and escape if he heard anyone coming. Hopefully that wouldn't be needed until the magical replacement for glue wore off and he could hide nearby until they were free. In his small size, he could always wrap himself in a napkin. Or even just hide in his clothes. He was grateful that his friends had at least been kind enough to leave him some options, even if they did all carry risk.
Maybe next time he'd go for a less public awkward/embarrassing moment. All well, at least it was worth it.
AN: Well, that end's that random piece of work. Though, once I started writing it, an actual story idea popped into my head, which is why there's a fair bit of unnecessary details. Such as Harry's nickname and ability. So, you know, might give that a shot. If people don't mind minor mutants taking the forefront.