I WILL
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Gakuen Alice.
Hi. My name's Mikan Sakura. Hazel-brown eyes, waist-length auburn hair, a cheery personality. I guess you don't know who I am. Kidding. Well, most of you probably know who I am. I'm Natsume Hyuuga's so-called 'girlfriend'. Why 'so-called'? Well, let me tell you my story.
I'm a simple girl living a simple life. I graduated high school with flying colors. I was the number one on our class. Due to this, my parents enrolled me at one of the best universities in the country. Alice University. Yes, you heard me right. My parents. They were the one who decided that I should study on this particular university and that I should get Information Technology as my course. I don't like to study there, really. I wanna be with my friends. But who am I to decide? They were my parents. They're the reason why I'm alive and breathing.
I remember my first day at school, I was alone. Well, what do you expect? I don't know anyone on this school. Many students were looking at me. I may have one of the best brains and prettiest face, but many people say that I look 'bratty'. But being the friendly me, I made friends. They were my first friends in that school. Hotaru, Sumire, Anna, Nonoko, Nobara, and Misaki. I also made friends with the guys on our class.
Then there was this boy, named Mochu, from the other class. He confessed in front of me and my classmates that he likes me. I thanked him for that. But I have to study well, and I haven't had a boyfriend before. He said that he wanted to court me, but I refused. I can't afford to have a boyfriend. I have to keep my grades high. I have to focus on my studies. I don't wanna have a broken heart. And I want my first love to be my husband, and to my likeness, I haven't fallen in love yet. Well, at least not yet. Not until the day that a 'plan' became the reason of my very first heartache.
Natsume was a smart guy. We were sort of rivals in class. He's good in different subjects. He's handsome too. We became close when he was chosen as one of the contestant for the Programming Contest. He was my partner. Ever since that day, we became close. We often tease each other. Mochu didn't stop 'bothering' me. He always do things to get my attention. One day, when he was pestering me again, my friends told him that I already have a boyfriend.
"Who?" he asked.
Hotaru smirked. "Natsume."
I smiled inwardly. Well, this isn't a bad plan. I can play with it. Natsume doesn't have a girlfriend, and I think he doesn't mind.
"You seem surprise. Yes, Natsume's my boyfriend."
His shoulders fell. I pity him. But this is the best way to keep him away from me. Natsume was sitting a few chairs away from me, and he looked at my direction when he heard Hotaru's announcement. I can read on his face the question "WHAT?". I winked at him, mouthing a 'just play along'.
"Sorry. I didn't know. I won't bother you anymore."
Mochu kept his word. Ever since that day, he didn't bother me anymore. Everybody in our class knew the real thing. That Natsume and I aren't really a couple. But as the days passed, It seems like I'm falling for him. Everytime he sits beside me, I can feel my heart beating fast, and seems like there were butterflies on my stomach. I blush whenever he compliments me. But I'm good at hiding my emotions. Haven't I told you earlier that my parents were the ones who decide for me? Well, ever since was younger, I always hide my feelings. I'm glad I can use this now.
Everything went well on my first semester in college. I made more friends and spent more time with Natsume. We had new classmates and the girlfriend-thingy was forgotten, but my feelings were still growing. I'm falling in love with him more and more each day. Too bad, seems like there's no chance that he'll like me back.
One of our new classmates, Luna, caught his attention. I think he likes her. She was pretty and smart too (but I'm smarter, mind you :D). I always catch him sneaking glances at Luna. It hurts me a lot, but I can't be jealous, am I? I don't have the right to. I'm just his friend, nothing more, nothing less. I tried to put my attention on my studies; our lessons were getting harder and harder each day.
Though the girlfriend thingy has been long forgotten by others, we still use it on teasing each other. Just like what happened before.
"Hey, where's Mochu?" he asked, teasing me.
I glared at him. "I dunno. Why? You like him? I never knew you're gay. If you want a new 'girlfriend', go find someone better than me," I said as I giggled.
"Well, I'll get Luna to replace you then."
I remained silent. That one hurts. I stood up, my back facing him. "Goodluck on that. Well, I have to go," then started walking away with tears forming on my eyes.
The day I dreaded the most came, just after a few days after that conversation.
"It's official. She's my girlfriend now."
I tried to smile. I can feel my heart shatter into pieces. Those six words, I haven't had prepared myself to hear those words this early. I wanna break down and cry, shout my feelings for him. But can't. I can see that he's happy with Luna, so why bother telling him my feelings? I can feel a lump on my throat. "Congratulations." I tried to sound more cheery for him. He hugged me and said, "I'm the happiest guy on Earth when she told me she loves me too."
Tears were threatening to fall from my eyes. I hold them back. He broke the hug and I blinked my eyes many times to fight back my tears. I smiled. But that smile didn't reach my eyes.
That day, I had my first heartache. It hurts a lot. It's like many knives were stabbing my heart and my tears can't stop flowing as I entered my room that night. In the following days, I always see them together. Natsume doesn't sit beside me anymore. He's always with Luna.
I keep on reminding myself as the days pass. I can move on. I will. It may not be tomorrow or the day after, but I promise, I will. I'll find someone better, someone who will love me back and heal my broken heart.
I promise I'll forget about him and move on.
Well. It just came into my mind. Haha. Kinda lame, eh?
Oh, please leave a review and kindly suggest some completed fics for me to read ;)
Hope you will. Thanks ;P
mikie
